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Lindsay Ph.D Tighe. Better Leaders Ask Better Questions
About the Author
Note from the Author
What people say about this book
What people say about our workshops
Prologue
Introduction
Chapter 1. Leadership hats
The teacher/trainer/educator
Internal consultant or the expert
The mentor
The ‘asker’ space
Chapter 2. The way we do things around here
Beliefs
Self-reflection
Chapter 3. What else drives ‘telling’?
Changing your style
The ego
Chapter 4. Consequences of ‘telling’
Chapter 5. Beware the victim
How we become victims
Chapter 6. The hot potato
Handling victim responses
We versus you language
The entrenched victim
Chapter 7. Questions. Big deal!
Everyone is amazing
I AM AMAZING
I AM AMAZING – PLEASE HELP ME TO REMEMBER THIS
Accountability
Motivation
The power of questions
Chapter 8. There are questions ... and there are questions!
Open questions
Take care when using ‘Why’
What makes a question a Better Question?
Getting creative
Chapter 9. Qualities of the ‘asker’
Desire to change and your mindset
Trust
Self-awareness
Letting go
Leading questions
Quegesstions
Should I ask or tell?
Time
Chapter 10. Listening to question
Decision and focus
Paraphrasing and empathy
Listening traps
‘Own story’ listening
‘Own meaning’ listening
Make friends with silence
Chapter 11. Asking yourself Better Questions
The need for self-reflection
Guidelines for self-questioning
Be as specific as you can
Don’t be judgmental
Let it flow
Be totally honest
Good questions to use
Chapter 12. Practical applications for asking Better Questions
Scenario 1 — someone has a problem
Scenario 2 – feedback is required
Scenario 3 — delegation
Scenario 4 — career development
Scenario 5 — Reflection and learning
Chapter 13. Reviewing and sustaining the practice
Chapter 14. A final thought
Join the leadership revolution . . . become a Potentialiser!
Epilogue
Emodules available
Other resources available. Books
Cards
Websites
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Lindsay Tighe is a successful and highly regarded speaker, businesswoman, author and coach who is passionate about inspiring people to improve their own lives and the lives of others. She has a unique blend of life experiences that include working in the corporate world, establishing and running her own business, and gaining formal qualifications, while her genuine love of people give her the ability to inspire and really make a difference to others. In this book, she shares the wisdom gained from her life’s journey (so far!) with real passion, compassion and a desire to make the world a better place.
Described as ‘inspirational, wise and intuitive’, Lindsay lives and breathes the philosophy that if you ask a better question you will get a better answer. She is committed to changing the world by helping people to have more empowered thoughts and conversations with each other in order to tap into their own wisdom.
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It will be good to explore the ‘asking’ space a little further, so let me share a non-work-related example of when I was able to support a client with a problem she had. In this example, you will see that I had no idea how to help her in a traditional ‘telling’ sense, but by asking her Better Questions she was able to be resourceful and find the answers herself. This particular client had come to me because she wanted to make a number of changes in her life – and one of these changes was that she wanted to give up smoking. What was interesting for me to acknowledge was that I was unable to stand in the ‘telling’ space because I had never been a smoker; I had no personal experience of having to give up smoking, and I also couldn’t draw on expertise from experiences of friends or family as they had never given up smoking either. I hope you can see that I couldn’t be teacher, trainer, educator, expert or mentor – I could only be an ‘asker’.
This was one of my first conscious experiences of being an ‘asker’ rather than a ‘teller’, and whilst I confess to feeling a little apprehensive because I wasn’t able to help in the traditional way by giving advice, I stuck to the principles I knew about asking Better Questions. I have to say that I was amazed by how resourceful my client was and how she was able to find her own answer to her problem. It wasn’t that she was incapable of finding answers to the problem of successfully giving up smoking, it was that she had not given herself enough focused time (and the right questions) to enable her to find the strategy that was going to work for her. Using the skills that I am going to share with you throughout this book, she was not only able to identify her success strategy, but within a matter of weeks she was able to put it into place to successfully become a non-smoker.
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