Whicker’s War and Journey of a Lifetime
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Alan Whicker. Whicker’s War and Journey of a Lifetime
ALAN WHICKER. WHICKER’S WAR and JOURNEY OF A LIFETIME
CONTENTS
ALAN WHICKER. WHICKER’S WAR
DEDICATION
CONTENTS
THAT EARLY SUMMER DAWN IN SICILY…
BEING SHOT WAS FOR ANOTHER DAY…
A LONG LIFE WAS NOT IN THE SCRIPT…
HIS MAJESTY GOT A WRONG NUMBER…
THEY ASKED FOR IT – AND THEY WILL NOW GET IT…
THEY ENLISTED THE GODFATHER…
I STILL FEEL RATHER GUILTY ABOUT THAT…
VERY BAD JOKES INDEED…
A PASSING GLANCE AT PARADISE…
STRUGGLING TO GET TICKETS FOR THE FIRST CASUALTY LIST…
THEY DIED WITHOUT ANYONE EVEN KNOWING THEIR NAMES…
I’M AFRAID WE’RE NOT QUITE READY FOR YOU YET…
YOU SHOULD HAVE HEARD HIM SCREAMING…
HITLER WOULD HAVE HAD HIM SHOT…
A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN WITH HER TEETH KNOCKED OUT…
OUT-GUNNED ON ONE SIDE, OUT-SCREAMED ON THE OTHER…
I HAVE COME TO RESCUE YOU…
THE CALL-BACK SEEMED WORSE THAN THE CALL-UP…
WHATEVER HAPPENED TO TIME MARCHING ON…?
THE SAGA OF THE D-DAY DODGERS…
INDEX
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
PICTURE CREDITS
ALAN WHICKER. JOURNEY OF A LIFETIME
1. THERE’S BEEN A CHANGE OF MANAGEMENT
2. A TALK WITH SOMEONE WHO’S NOT TREMBLING
3. TWO LHASA APSOS AND A COUPLE OF PANTECHNICONS
4. CITY OF DREADFUL JOY
5. RELIEVING PATIENTS OF MANY POUNDS – ONE WAY OR THE OTHER
6. RANDOLPH: AS RUDE TO AMBASSADORS AS HE WAS TO WAITERS
7. NO ONE CARED ENOUGH
8. STILL NO DEAL WITH THE DEVIL
9. IN AMERICA’S SMARTEST SOCIAL RESORT ONLY THE LONELINESS GETS WORSE
10. YOU DIDN’T LOOK LIKE THAT IN HELLO!
11. IN MEXICO DEATH KNOCKS MORE OFTEN AND MUST MORE FREQUENTLY BE ADMITTED
12. EASY TO TEACH WOMEN TO SHOOT, HARDER TO TEACH THEM TO KILL
13. A POM WHO’S MADE GOOD – IF THAT’S THE WORD
14. A MOST SIGNIFICANT PINNACLE OF CORAL
15. THAT’S FOR THE RELEVANT DEMON-GIANT TO WORRY ABOUT
16. ALL THE TIME YOU HAVE A SENSE OF IMPENDING DISASTER
17. I’VE ALWAYS WISHED I HAD A BETTER PERSONALITY
18. THEY FEED THE PIGS ON PASSION FRUIT, THE SHEEP ON WILD PEACHES
19. TROUBLED SPIRITS, NEVER QUITE COMFORTABLE IN THEIR SKINS
20. I DON’T MIND A BEATING PROVIDED IT’S BEDSTAKES AFTERWARDS
21. THEY LIVE IN BAREFOOT POVERTY – AND NEVER SEE A MAN
22. A FEW LEFT BEHIND WHEN THE TIDE RAN OUT
23. NO MONEY, NO ENGLISH – AND NO TROUSERS
24. I AWAITED THE STRETCHER-BEARERS, BLEEDING QUIETLY
25. A RATHER SMALL UTRILLO
26. THIRTY BODYGUARDS FOR DINNER
27. THE RIGHT INTERESTS: LADIES, HORSE-RACING – AND TAKING THE LOCALS FOR A RIDE
28. BACKSTAGE AT THE ROYAL PALACE
29. NEVER A FRIENDLY ARMOURED DIVISION AROUND WHEN YOU NEED ONE
30. THE PARTY’S OVER – IT’S TIME TO CALL IT A DAY
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
ALSO BY THE AUTHOR
COPYRIGHT
ABOUT THE PUBLISHER
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Title Page
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Throughout the length of Italy German engineers delayed our advance by blowing every bridge in our path.
The Royal Engineers’ first solution sometimes looked slightly insecure …
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