Ivan the Terrible

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Anne Fine. Ivan the Terrible

Contents

1. In which I meet Ivan and realise I am in for a really hard time

2. In which I decide I am a hot dinner and Ivan must be a packed lunch

3. In which I sing songs to toddlers about death, violence, poverty, hunger, beatings and cruelty to animals

4. In which I as good as threaten Ivan with poisonous pizza

5. In which I remember a little about Vladivostock and learn a lot about litter

6. In which Ivan chats to the teachers over an excellent lunch, and I choke to death on cold pizza

7. In which we all sing one song and Ivan sings another

8. In which Ivan sits with his back to us and writes busily at the table

9. In which rescue arrives in the shape of a very angry mother, great musical talent, and a small mistake

10. In which a lot of parents come up to the school to complain about report cards

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1 In which I meet Ivan and realise I am in for a really hard time

2 In which I decide I am a hot dinner and Ivan must be a packed lunch

.....

And then we came to our bit. Mrs Blaizely changed to her really bright and enthusiastic voice. ‘I have someone to introduce to you,’ she said to everyone. ‘His name is Ivan and he comes from a huge country called Russia. Russia’s so big that some snowg parts in the north are way up in the Arctic Circle while some parts in the south are so dry that they’re desert.’

She beckoned to Ivan. ‘Don’t be shy. Come up here on stage so everyone can see you and know that they’ve got to be especially thoughtful and considerate until you’ve settled in.’

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