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The Meathead Manifesto
Foreword
Getting Through That First Week
The Importance of the Training Partner
What to Wear and (Infinitely More Important) What Not to Wear to the Gym
How to Tell If Your Trainer Is a Douchebag
How to tell if you’re a Douchebag Client
The Thing about Squats
(A Little Bit) About Etiquette
The Benefits of Circuit Training
Debunking the Myths Surrounding Personal Training (+Training a Meathead!)
Form. Is. Everything
(So) Breathing. Is. Really. Everything
On Selfies and Sexting
Sexting: All Kinds of Wrong
My Love Affair with DOMS
The Rules of Attraction (--and Attracting--) At Your Gym
Put the Damn Weights Away
Finding Your Motivation
Shut Up
Getting Back Into It
Study up
Knowing when to walk away
The Ladies’ Only Section
The Adonis Complex
Stretching
Remembering the ‘Little Parts’
Muscle Confusion
Intensity
Tough Love
One of the guys
For the taking
Why Women Love Assholes
Why men cheat
How to Win her Over (or at least get her to call you again.)
How to Win Her Back (--provided there’s any winning back to be done)
How to Survive the Post-Dinner Movie (Without Coming on Too Strong)
How to Set Up that Second Date
The Art of Reconciliation
How to Handle Your Raging Jealousy
How to Meet Her Mother
How to Let Her Go
How to Meet Her Father
How to Get Over Yourself
The Art of ‘Spicing it Up’
Getting the Right Gift
The Meathead Manifesto, Book 3
Protein Intake (For Meatheads)
Protein Intake for Girly-Men (and Girls!!)
Whey vs. Casein vs. Soy vs. Food vs. You
A Final Meditation on Protein
Caffeine is Good for You!!!!
Creatine is Not the Enemy
(Unless) Creatine is the Enemy
Steroids are bad
Carbs are fun!
Fat, like the stuff you need (as opposed to the thing that you think you are.)
The Paleo Diet (Or, Your Excuse to Eat like the Caveman You Are)
6 is more than 3
Going Gluten Free
Meathead meal plan: For days ending in ‘y.’
A Final Bit of Advice (in lieu of an epilogue)
Brody McVittie.
Guys who workout as hard as they party.
.....
Fortunately, I’m sure some psychologist (far smarter than myself) has established that you’ll know ‘within Five Minutes of meeting someone, whether or not you like them.’ Meaning, ideally, you’ve got the rest of the hour/appointment to actually absorb the dumbed-down scientific process of the torture to come.
Yeah, you’ll now really quickly whether or not you like your Personal Trainer, which leads me to my next point . . .
.....