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Out of the Woods
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But here’s where it gets tricky. That good, changed life comes with longevity; more time in recovery does equal more exposure to new ideas, concepts, and learning as we go, layer upon layer, through the Twelve Steps. But those changes and that growth are not directly correlated to simply accumulating days in recovery. And not everyone in the rooms wants the kind of deep, continual life-changing recovery that I am describing. I find that I still have to look around the rooms and ask myself, “Who has what I want?”
It’s possible to have thirty-five years of recovery and still be miserable and unhappy and filled with resentment and fear. (Sorry, but it’s true.) We share the rooms with some people who have been around a long time and they are still unhappy at work and unhappy in their primary relationships. That is not the kind of recovery I seek. I want a quality recovery. Marty Mann, one of the first women to recover in Alcoholics Anonymous, and a close friend of Bill Wilson, is credited with first expressing the notion that it’s the quality of your recovery that counts, not the length of it.
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