One More Croissant for the Road

One More Croissant for the Road
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‘Joyful, life-affirming, greedy. I loved it’ – DIANA HENRY‘Whether you are an avid cyclist, a Francophile, a greedy gut, or simply an appreciator of impeccable writing – this book will get you hooked’ – YOTAM OTTOLENGHIThe nation’s ‘taster in chief’ cycles 2,300 km across France in search of the definitive versions of classic French dishes.A green bike drunkenly weaves its way up a cratered hill in the late-morning sun, the gears grinding painfully, like a pepper mill running on empty. The rider crouched on top in a rictus of pain has slowed to a gravity-defying crawl when, from somewhere nearby, the whine of a nasal engine breaks through her ragged breathing. A battered van appears behind her, the customary cigarette dangling from its driver’s-side window… as he passes, she casually reaches down for some water, smiling broadly in the manner of someone having almost too much fun. ‘No sweat,’ she says jauntily to his retreating exhaust pipe. ‘Pas de problème, monsieur.’A land of glorious landscapes, and even more glorious food, France is a place built for cycling and for eating, too – a country large enough to give any journey an epic quality, but with a bakery on every corner. Here, you can go from beach to mountain, Atlantic to Mediterranean, polder to Pyrenees, and taste the difference every time you stop for lunch. If you make it to lunch, that is…Part travelogue, part food memoir, all love letter to France, One More Croissant for the Road follows ‘the nation’s taster in chief’ Felicity Cloake’s very own Tour de France, cycling 2,300km across France in search of culinary perfection; from Tarte Tatin to Cassoulet via Poule au Pot, and Tartiflette. Each of the 21 ‘stages’ concludes with Felicity putting this new found knowledge to good use in a fresh and definitive recipe for each dish – the culmination of her rigorous and thorough investigative work on behalf of all of our taste buds.

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Felicity Cloake. One More Croissant for the Road

Copyright

Dedication

Contents

Prologue

PAUSE-CAFÉ – The Croissant Rating System

PAUSE-CAFÉ – Cycle Touring: A Bluffer’s Guide

STAGE 1. The Grand Départ, London to Cherbourg

Douillons aux Poires – or Pears in Pyjamas

PAUSE-CAFÉ – Breakfast in France: A Beginner’s Guide

Douillons aux Poires, or Pears in Pyjamas

STAGE 2. Cherbourg to Avranches

Moules Marinières

Moules Marinières

STAGE 3. Avranches to Dol-de-Bretagne

Omelette Soufflée

Omelette Soufflée à la Mère Poularde

STAGE 4. Dol-de-Bretagne to Saint-Malo

A Platter of Oysters

PAUSE-CAFÉ – The Mysterious Fruits of the Sea

A Platter of Oysters

STAGE 5. Saint-Malo to Redon

Crêpes Complètes

PAUSE-CAFÉ – French Trains

Crêpes Complètes (buckwheat pancakes with ham, cheese and egg)

Km: 53.5. Croissants: 0 (potato pancakes with Marmite: 2) High: Eventually producing a half-decent crêpe. Low: Nearly making a ticket inspector cry with pity

STAGE 6. A Stage in Two Parts: Redon to Tours, Paris to Lamotte-Beuvron

Tarte Tatin

PART ONE: Redon to Tours

PAUSE-CAFÉ – French Opening Hours: A Fun Guessing Game for all the Family

Km: 89.3. Croissants: 2 (average score, 6.5) High: The apple-tapping museum continues to cheer me up for weeks. Low: First hangover. PART TWO, THREE MONTHS LATER: Paris to Lamotte-Beuvron (TARTE TATIN AT LAST)

The Brotherhood of Tarte Tatin Lovers’ Official Recipe for Tarte Tatin

STAGE 7. Limoges (Circuit)

Clafoutis aux Cerises

PAUSE-CAFÉ – Black or Blue?

Clafoutis aux Cerises

STAGE 8. Limoges to Bayonne

Chocolat Chaud

PAUSE-CAFÉ – Chocolat

Hot Chocolate and Buttered Brioche (in the style of Maison Cazenave)

STAGE 9. Bayonne to Pau

Poule au Pot

PAUSE-CAFÉ – French Bread: A Bluffer’s Guide

Poule au Pot à la Façon de Chez Olive

STAGE 10. Pau to Carcassonne

Cassoulet

PAUSE-CAFÉ – Cassoulet: When Baked Beans Go to Heaven

Cassoulet

STAGE 11. Marseille

Provençal Fish Soup

Provençal fish soup

PAUSE-CAFÉ – Couscous

Km: 36.8. Croissants: 0; North African flatbreads: 1. High: Lunch Chez Meades. Low: Losing Eddy in Le Panier

STAGE 12. Marseille to Nice

Ratatouille

PAUSE-CAFÉ – Piment d’Espelette

Ratatouille

STAGE 13. The Col de Joux Plane

Tartiflette

PAUSE-CAFÉ – French Sausages, a Field Guide

Tartiflette

STAGE 14. Lyon

Salade Lyonnaise

PAUSE-CAFÉ – Andouillette

Salade Lyonnaise

STAGE 15. Chalon-sur-Saône to Dijon

Boeuf Bourguignon

PAUSE-CAFÉ – Confession Time

Boeuf Bourguignon

STAGE 16. Strasbourg to Meistratzheim

Choucroute Garnie

PAUSE-CAFÉ – ‘French Mustard’ n’Existe Pas

PAUSE-CAFÉ – The Wine-Snugs of Alsace

Choucroute (based on the Chez Yvonne recipe)

Km: 71.3. Croissants: 1 (8.5/10), plus a 10/10 banana and Marmite sandwich in the Strasbourg apartment. High: The choucroute factory, obviously. Low: Being dissed by a cat

STAGE 17. Meistratzheim to Nancy

Quiche Lorraine

PAUSE-CAFÉ – The French Menu/Carte

Quiche Lorraine

STAGE 18. Toul to Bar-le-Duc

Madeleines

Brown Butter Madeleines

STAGE 19. Bar-le-Duc to Reims

Soupe à l’Oignon Gratinée

PAUSE-CAFÉ – Coffee Break

Onion Soup à la Stanislas

STAGE 20. Reims to Bondy

Croque Monsieur

Croque Monsieur de Meaux

PAUSE-CAFÉ – The Restorative Restaurant

STAGE 21. Bondy to Paris

Croissant 101

PAUSE-CAFÉ – The Croissant, Une Petite Histoire

Butter Croissants

Acknowledgements

Praise for One More Croissant for the Road

Matthew Fort

Caroline Eden

Yotam Ottolenghi

Hadley Freeman

Tim Hayward

Diana Henry

Anna Jones

Rosie Birkett

Rhik Samadder

Bee Wilson

Rachel Roddy

Meera Sodha

About the Publisher

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In the text that follows, all scores are out of 10: 1–4 denotes a poor croissant not even worth finishing (a croissant contains about 260kcal); 5–7 as a mediocre-to-decent example not worth complaining about and 8+ as a good croissant worth repeating immediately if time permits.

It’s a satisfyingly neat loop around the country, but one, I note, that covers an awful lot of ground. A cursory google turns up the terrifying fact that France is the largest country in Western Europe, a whopping 27 times the size of Wales. Distances are vast – it looks like it might take me at least three days to cycle across Brittany alone.

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