Enjoying Self-Sustained Depression

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Harold Rowland. Enjoying Self-Sustained Depression

ENJOYING SELF-SUSTAINED DEPRESSION

EVER-LASTING MEMORIES

THINGS MISSED

THIRD CHRISTMAS

FEAR OR CAUTIOUS

WHAT NOW?-NOW WHAT?

49 MILES OVER SIXTY YEARS

THE UNEXPECTED

MID-LIFE

TWENTY EIGHT THOUSAND PAGES

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How long ago was it when you had a good belly laugh at yourself for not remembering why your hat is in your hand and you’re in front of the refrigerator? Little things are not as important as hearing an old song that brings back memories of the first date with your life time mate, and tears appear from nowhere. After all the refrigerator is before you and the memory is only sixty plus years ago. Things you never noticed before such as songs, smells, and sights trigger the brain and bring back important memories that are more important than the present. Today doesn’t appear to be special until you see tomorrow, and now today is only a memory along with the extra special days and nights of the past. Time passes and the daily routine of life doesn’t dim the pain and joy that memories bring, and sometimes the past is more enjoyable than the present.

World War II is over and the world is starting to recover and getting some of the bad memoirs behind and looking for a bright future. I met my wife to be at work, she was a telephone operator and I was a central office telephone equipment installer. We worked the night shift and I ask her one morning if she would like a ride home, and she said yes. She was living with her parents and brothers and sisters in a home close to the school. This broke the ice and I ask about a date as we both had the weekend off, she agreed and we went dancing. We dated off and on until my job was finished and was transferred to a town close by. I was on the day shift and she was working nights, that left the time between 5 PM and 11 PM open for us to see each other which we did every other day. As time went by I felt more and more comfortable with her and I was transferred 500 miles away. I made this trip on weekends just to be with her for such a short time made being apart was rough. I receive a transfer so I was only about 250 miles from her and working night shift and still making the weekend trips. One Wednesday in November about 3 AM, I phoned her and ask what she was doing this coming weekend, she replied nothing for sure. I said would you like to get married Saturday? The phone was silent and the reply I wanted finely came. We made our plans and this was the beginning of our life time together.

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One of our church members told me of a house that would be for sale soon, if I was interested and I told him I was and made arrangements for my wife and I to look it over. The house was an answer to problems we were having at that time with me sleeping during the day and the kids in the house making noise. Our friend told us he was working on his Real Estate Licenses and he needed the experience he would not charge us the usual fee, this made it possible for us to make the down payment. When we moved in there was so much room after living in apartments for so long, but that was to change as in July we were presented a girl, Edith perfect and loud as the boys. This house had a detached garage where I built me a bedroom, away from the house, so the kids could be kids and a mother could be a mother. And mother she did, when I was working the graveyard shift ever now and then, she would put the kids to bed early. She would come out to my bedroom climb into bed; these were times when physical love brings a man and woman to understand the true meaning of marital union.

These are the beginning of many happy memories to remember and they can cause depression deep and dark because they will not happen again ….

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