Читать книгу Dancer in the Dark - Heidi Palazzo - Страница 1

You were the first true friend I ever had.

I grew up feeling nothing and feared I was a monster. There is only so much violence that can be reflected in the eyes of a child before their innocence hardens. I ate to fill the black hole inside, then hated myself more because people wanted me even less than they already did. I ended up turning myself inside out, hoping deprivation would suddenly make me beautiful. Weak in my quest for beauty, I never stood a chance against the ways new wounds could smother old ones.

I had friends that were connected to the version of me I yearned to be. Always smiling, laughing, hoping. That with enough force, it would stay. But my mind would awaken, that house would shake, and the transient wonder of a girl would slip away.

Then there was you. Oh, you. By the glow of that screen that connected England to my tiny room in Australia, I undressed and lay my reality naked before you. You understood, because chaos haunted your path, too.

You captivated me, and on a bed of roses I listened to the murmurs of a newborn heart. In each other, we found a place we both could live.

And so it began. The dance of a lover guided by the light of a friend.