Random Shots from a Rifleman

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J. Kincaid. Random Shots from a Rifleman

Random Shots from a Rifleman

Table of Contents

CHAPTER I. Family Pictures, with select Views of the Estate, fenced with distant Prospects

CHAP. II

ANECDOTE THE FIRST

ANECDOTE THE SECOND

ANECDOTE THE THIRD

ANECDOTE THE FOURTH

CHAP. III. An old one takes to his heels, leaving a young one in arms.—The dessert does not always follow the last course of—a goose.—Goes to the war, and ends in love

"A LAY OF LOVE FOR LADY BRIGHT."

CHAP. IV. Shewing how generals may descend upon particulars with a cat-o'-nine tails. Some extra Tales added. Historical, Comical, and Warlike all

CHAP. V. The paying of a French compliment, which will be repaid in a future chapter. A fierce attack upon hairs. A niece compliment, and lessons gratis to untaught sword-bearers

CHAP. VI. Reaping a Horse with a Halter. Reaping golden Opinions out of a Dung-Hill, and reaping a good Story or two out of the next Room. A Dog-Hunt and Sheep's Heads prepared at the Expense of a Dollar each, and a Scotchman's Nose

THE OFFICER'S STORY

CHAP. VII

CHAP. VII. The persecution of the guardian of two angels. A Caçadore and his mounted followers. A chief of hussars in his trousers. A chief of rifles in his glory, and a sub of ditto with two screws in the neck

CHAP. VIII. National Characters. Adventures of a pair of leather Breeches. Ditto of a pound of Beef. Shewing what the French General did not do, and a Prayer which he did not pray; with a few random Shots

SHOT THE FIRST. The Duel

SHOT THE SECOND. Cannon-Law

SHOT THE THIRD. Civil Law

SHOT THE FOURTH. Sword Law

SHOT THE FIFTH. Love Law

SHOT THE SIXTH. At a sore subject

CHAP. IX. A bishop's gathering.—Volunteers for a soldier's love, with a portrait of the lover.—Burning a bivouac.—Old invented thrashing machines and baking concerns.—A flying Padre taking a shot flying

CHAP. X. Shewing how a volunteer may not be what Doctor Johnson made him.—A mayor's nest.—Cupping.—The Author's reasons for punishing the world with a book.—And some volunteers of the right sort

CHAP. XI. Very short, with a few anecdotes still shorter; but the principal actors thought the scenes long enough

CHAP. XII. Shewing rough visitors receiving a rough reception. Some living and moving specimens thereof. Tailors not such fractions of humanity as is generally believed. Gentle visitors receiving a gentle reception, which ends by shewing that two shakes joined together sound more melodiously on the heart-strings than two hands which shake of their own accord

CHAP. XIII. Specimens of target-practice, in which markers may become marked men.—A grave anecdote, shewing how "some men have honours thrust upon them."—A line drawn between man and beast.—Lines drawn between regiments, and shewing how credit may not be gained by losing what they are made of.—Aristocratic.—Dedicatic.—Dissertation on advanced guards, and desertion of knapsacks, shewing that "the greater haste the worse speed."

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J. Kincaid

Published by Good Press, 2019

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It is not therefore much to be wondered at, if a parcel of wild young fellows thrown on their own resources, when that warlike age required a larking spirit to be encouraged rather than repressed amongst them—I say, it is not to be wondered at if they did occasionally amuse themselves with a class of persons which, under other circumstances, they would have avoided, and if the consequences were sometimes what they had better not have been—but the accounts between the man and woman of that day having been long since closed, it is not for me to re-open them, yet I remember that even that manner of life was not without its charms.

The only variety in my year's militia life was an encampment on the lines at Chatham, where we did duty on board the hulks, in the Medway. My post was for the greater period with a guard on board the old Irresistible, which was laden with about eight hundred heavy Danes who had been found guilty of defending their property against their invaders, and I can answer for it that they were made as miserable as any body of men detected in such a heinous crime had a right to be, for of all diabolical constructions in the shape of prisons the hulks claim by right a pre-eminence. However, we were then acting under the broad acknowledged principle, that those who are not for, are against us, and upon that same principle, the worthy Danes with their ships were respectfully invited to repose themselves for a while within our hospitable harbours.

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