The Happy Hypochondriac Survives World Travel

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Kat Spitzer. The Happy Hypochondriac Survives World Travel

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Advance Praise

“This book is equal measures heartwarming and funny. Again, the Happy Hypochondriac shows that fears that beset us all need not stand in the way of a pleasurable life. I say this mainly because my wife, the Happy Hypochondriac, will read this and I am not a stupid husband. However, I also say this because it’s true. Of course, one hope for this book is that some of the random strangers we’ve encountered on our travels will read it and understand, ‘so THAT’s what that was all about….’”

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Belly full and mouth a little shiny, I headed out to the main lounge for some dancing. My father taught me to ballroom dance at an early age and he took every chance he could to show off my skills. They weren’t competition worthy or anything, but I could hold my own, be led easily by someone with skill, and amaze the older crowd with my mediocre footwork. My dad had been a cotillion escort during his younger days in the south and found the skill to be of utmost importance. In his eyes, the youth of my generation were suffering from severe ballroom dancing inadequacy; a condition he equated to bad breath and limp handshakes; unforgiveable.

We took the stage. My mother snapped photos. I noticed the curtains, navy blue velvet with millions of embedded pieces of glitter, catching the stage lights and disco ball in a way that lit the room. I also noticed that the curtains were swaying so violently that they rarely touched the ground, but instead, kicked up into the air like the waves outside. As we box-stepped, a step back turned into five as we fell to the rhythm towards the ocean with the listing ship. Then we’d spring back in the other direction, attempting to make our little rapid steps appear to be part of the dance. At one point we spun and lost our balance as the ship plunged over a watery precipice, but my father’s strength kept me afoot, his fingers digging into my back to hold us both steady. A few people walked out. I hoped it wasn’t because of our sloppy performance. I don’t like to disappoint a crowd. But I had a feeling it was because they needed to quickly find a place to lose their dinner. I was starting to feel the same way.

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