Seeking Rapture: A Memoir

Seeking Rapture: A Memoir
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From the bestselling author of ‘The Binding Chair’, this dazzling follow-up to her memoir ‘the Kiss’ explores the bonds of motherhood between four generations.When Kathryn Harrison was a little girl, her young mother left her in the care of her British grandmother who was raised in Shanghai. To Kathryn, her mother's mother seemed an almost unimaginably powerful figure: an imperious arbiter of good taste and a master storyteller, who, when coaxed, might reveal stories of a magic and vanished world. She jilted an array of suitable men before concluding that she was not quite modern enough to have a baby without a husband. At the age of 43 she finally married, and the fruit of this union, Harrison's mother, was no more interested than she in being bound by convention. An occasional witness to her daughter's growth to adulthood, she would appear sporadically in film-star clothes and urge unwanted glamour on her shy child. Harrison grew up a spectator of the remarkable, striving to comprehend these women and yet find her own way to live.In this witty, touching memoir, Harrison writes of the ties that bind mothers to their children – and the forces that can drive them apart. She ponders the legacy of storytelling she inherited from her grandmother, and peers into the deep well of family history from which she draws inspiration for her novels. Reconsidering her past as she watches her own children grow, she recalls the thrilling risk of shoplifting; the longing for perfection that resulted in a fierce eating disorder; the thunderous fights that showed how impossible and how necessary it was to leave home. ‘Seeking Rapture’ conveys the aching tenderness Harrison feels toward her children, and her awe of their imaginary worlds that no adult can enter. This powerfully evocative book will awaken readers to sift through their own sense of motherhood, loss and regeneration. In prose that sings, ‘Seeking Rapture’ chronicles the unforgettable episodes that form the drama of domestic life.

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Kathryn Harrison. Seeking Rapture: A Memoir

Seeking Rapture

Dedication

Epigraph

Contents

The Children’s Room

Home for the Holidays

Interior Castles I

Seeking Rapture

Interior Castles II

Keeping Time

Tick

Siva’s Daughters

Minor Surgeries

Beach Trip

The Supermarket Detective

A Pilgrimage to Saks Fifth Avenue

Renewal

What Remains

Nitpickers

Labor

Mother’s Day Card

If you enjoyed Seeking Rapture, check out this other great Kathryn Harrison title

Acknowledgments

Also by the Author

Copyright

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A Memoir

KATHRYN HARRISON

.....

‘You have to wear pearls every day,’ she said. ‘They have to be against your skin.’ She touched them. Now that she was old and thin, they hung lower than they had in the portrait. ‘If you don’t wear pearls,’ she said, ‘they die. They go gray and dull.’

It sounded fanciful, but maybe my grandmother was right. I haven’t worn the pearls, and recently I discovered that the white luster of a few of the larger ones has vanished. I think, though, that the reason my grandmother guarded the necklace so literally close to her heart was that it was a gift from her father, who loved her extravagantly and whose love she returned in like measure. Was it because she felt no other man lived up to the father she adored that my grandmother didn’t marry until after he died? She thwarted him, though. She rejected every match he made for her, and she did it flagrantly. ‘Poor Rube,’ she’d say. ‘Poor David.’ She’d shake her head, but I could tell that the gesture was one of manufactured sympathy, a tenderness she’d been taught to express.

.....

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