Gullible's Travels, Etc.

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Lardner Ring. Gullible's Travels, Etc.

CARMEN

THREE KINGS AND A PAIR

GULLIBLE'S TRAVELS

I

II

III

IV

V

VI

VII

THE WATER CURE

THREE WITHOUT, DOUBLED

I

II

III

IV

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Accordin' to some authorities, a person, before they get married, should ought to look up your opponent's family tree and find out what all her relatives died of. But the way I got it figured out, if you're sure they did die, the rest of it don't make no difference. In exceptionable cases it may be all right to take a girl that part of her family is still livin', but not under no circumstances if the part happens to be a unmarried sister named Bessie.

We was expectin' her in about two weeks, but we got a card Saturday mornin' which she says on it that she'd come right away if it was all the same to us, because it was the dull season in Wabash society and she could tear loose better at the present time than later on. Well, I guess they ain't no time in the year when society in Wabash would collapse for she not bein' there, but if she had to come at all, the sooner it was over the better. And besides, it wouldn't of did us no good to say aye, yes or no, because the postcard only beat her here by a few hours.

.....

"What's it about?" I says.

He stalled a w'ile.

.....