The Complete Non-Fiction Writings of Mark Twain: Old Times on the Mississippi + Life on the Mississippi + Christian Science + Queen Victoria's Jubilee + My Platonic Sweetheart + Editorial Wild Oats
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Mark Twain. The Complete Non-Fiction Writings of Mark Twain: Old Times on the Mississippi + Life on the Mississippi + Christian Science + Queen Victoria's Jubilee + My Platonic Sweetheart + Editorial Wild Oats
The Complete Non-Fiction Writings of Mark Twain
Table of Contents
OLD TIMES ON THE MISSISSIPPI
CHAPTER 1. The Boys’ Ambition
CHAPTER 2. I Want to be a Cub-pilot
CHAPTER 3. A Cub-pilot’s Experience
CHAPTER 4. A Daring Deed
CHAPTER 5. Perplexing Lessons
CHAPTER 6. Continued Perplexities
CHAPTER 7. Completing My Education
CHAPTER 8. The River Rises
CHAPTER 9. Sounding
CHAPTER 10. A Pilot’s Needs
CHAPTER 11. Rank and Dignity of Piloting
CHAPTER 12. The Pilots’ Monopoly
CHAPTER 13. Racing Days
CHAPTER 14. Cutoffs and Stephen
LIFE ON THE MISSISSIPPI
THE ‘BODY OF THE NATION’
Chapter 1
The River and Its History
Chapter 2
The River and Its Explorers
Chapter 3
Frescoes from the Past
Chapter 4
The Boys’ Ambition
Chapter 5
I Want to be a Cub-pilot
Chapter 6
A Cub-pilot’s Experience
Chapter 7
A Daring Deed
Chapter 8
Perplexing Lessons
Chapter 9
Continued Perplexities
Chapter 10
Completing My Education
Chapter 11
The River Rises
Chapter 12
Sounding
Chapter 13. A Pilot’s Needs
Chapter 14. Rank and Dignity of Piloting
Chapter 15. The Pilots’ Monopoly
Chapter 16. Racing Days
Chapter 17. Cutoffs and Stephen
Chapter 18. I Take a Few Extra Lessons
Chapter 19. Brown and I Exchange Compliments
Chapter 20. A Catastrophe
Chapter 21. A Section in My Biography
Chapter 22. I Return to My Muttons
Chapter 23. Traveling Incognito
Chapter 24. My Incognito is Exploded
Chapter 25. From Cairo to Hickman
Chapter 26. Under Fire
Chapter 27. Some Imported Articles
Chapter 28. Uncle Mumford Unloads
Chapter 29. A Few Specimen Bricks
Chapter 30. Sketches by the Way
Chapter 31. A Thumbprint and What Came of It
Chapter 32. The Disposal of a Bonanza
Chapter 33. Refreshments and Ethics
Chapter 34. Tough Yarns
Chapter 35. Vicksburg During the Trouble
Chapter 36. The Professor’s Yarn
Chapter 37. The End of the ‘Gold Dust’
Chapter 38. The House Beautiful
Chapter 39. Manufactures and Miscreants
Chapter 40. Castles and Culture
Chapter 41. The Metropolis of the South
Chapter 42. Hygiene and Sentiment
Chapter 43. The Art of Inhumation
Chapter 44. City Sights
Chapter 45. Southern Sports
Chapter 46. Enchantments and Enchanters
Chapter 47. Uncle Remus and Mr. Cable
Chapter 48. Sugar and Postage
Chapter 49. Episodes in Pilot Life
Chapter 50. The ‘Original Jacobs’
Chapter 51. Reminiscences
Chapter 52. A Burning Brand
Chapter 53. My Boyhood’s Home
Chapter 54. Past and Present
Chapter 55. A Vendetta and Other Things
Chapter 56. A Question of Law
Chapter 57. An Archangel
Chapter 58. On the Upper River
Chapter 59. Legends and Scenery
Chapter 60. Speculations and Conclusions
APPENDIX
APPENDIX A
APPENDIX B
APPENDIX C
APPENDIX D
CHRISTIAN SCIENCE
PREFACE
BOOK I CHRISTIAN SCIENCE
CHAPTER I
VIENNA 1899
CHAPTER II
CHAPTER III
CHAPTER IV
CHAPTER V
CHAPTER VI
CHAPTER VII
CHAPTER VIII
CHAPTER IX
BOOK II
CHAPTER I
CHAPTER II
CHAPTER III
CHAPTER IV
POSTSCRIPT
CHAPTER V
SUMMARY
CHAPTER VI
THE PASTOR EMERITUS
THE BOARD OF DIRECTORS
THE PRESIDENT
TREASURER AND CLERK
BOARD OF TRUSTEES
READERS
ELECTION OF READERS
THE ARISTOCRACY
CHURCH MEMBERSHIP
AND SOME ENGLISH REQUIRED
“READERS” AGAIN
MONOPOLY OF SPIRITUAL BREAD
CHAPTER VII
THE NEW INFALLIBILITY
THE SACRED POEMS
THE CHURCH EDIFICE
PRAYER
THE LORD’S PRAYER-AMENDED
THE NEW UNPARDONABLE SIN
AXE AND BLOCK
READING LETTERS AT MEETINGS
HONESTY REQUISITE
FURTHER APPLICATIONS OF THE AXE
MORE SELF-PROTECTIONS
BOARD OF EDUCATION
PUBLIC TEACHERS
BOARD OF LECTURESHIP
MISSIONARIES
THE BY-LAWS
THE CREED
CHRISTIAN SCIENCE PUBLISHING ASSOCIATION
THE CHRISTIAN SCIENCE PUBLISHING SOCIETY
CHAPTER VIII
“MOTHER-CHURCH UNIQUE”
“NO FIRST MEMBERS”
“THE”
A LIFE-TERM MONOPOLY
A PERPETUAL ONE
THE SANCTUM SANCTORUM AND SACRED CHAIR
THE CHRISTIAN SCIENCE PASTOR-UNIVERSAL
PRICE OF THE PASTOR-UNIVERSAL
SEVEN HUNDRED PER CENT
CHAPTER IX
CHAPTER X
CHAPTER XI
CHAPTER XII
CHAPTER XIII
CHAPTER XIV
CHAPTER XV
APPENDIX A
ORIGINAL FIRST PREFACE TO SCIENCE AND HEALTH
APPENDIX B
APPENDIX C
APPENDIX D
APPENDIX E
APPENDIX F
MRS. EDDY IN ERROR
MAIN PARTS OF THE MACHINE
DISTRIBUTION OF THE MACHINE’S POWERS AND DIGNITIES
CONCLUSION
QUEEN VICTORIA’S JUBILEE
MY PLATONIC SWEETHEART
EDITORIAL WILD OATS
My First Literary Venture
Journalism in Tennessee
Nicodemus Dodge — Printer
Mr. Bloke’s Item
How I Edited an Agricultural Paper
The Killing of Julius Cæsar “Localized
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Mark Twain
Old Times on the Mississippi + Life on the Mississippi + Christian Science + Queen Victoria’s Jubilee + My Platonic Sweetheart + Editorial Wild Oats
.....
‘Exactly. Cramp her up to the bar! What are you standing up through the middle of the river for?’
The next few months showed me strange things. On the same day that we held the conversation above narrated, we met a great rise coming down the river. The whole vast face of the stream was black with drifting dead logs, broken boughs, and great trees that had caved in and been washed away. It required the nicest steering to pick one’s way through this rushing raft, even in the daytime, when crossing from point to point; and at night the difficulty was mightily increased; every now and then a huge log, lying deep in the water, would suddenly appear right under our bows, coming head-on; no use to try to avoid it then; we could only stop the engines, and one wheel would walk over that log from one end to the other, keeping up a thundering racket and careening the boat in a way that was very uncomfortable to passengers. Now and then we would hit one of these sunken logs a rattling bang, dead in the center, with a full head of steam, and it would stun the boat as if she had hit a continent. Sometimes this log would lodge, and stay right across our nose, and back the Mississippi up before it; we would have to do a little crawfishing, then, to get away from the obstruction. We often hit WHITE logs, in the dark, for we could not see them till we were right on them; but a black log is a pretty distinct object at night. A white snag is an ugly customer when the daylight is gone.
.....