Sometimes I wonder how I didn't go crazy and end up in some nut house through all the madness I had endured throughout the years. The violence I witnessed as a child, being molested, dealing with alcoholism, deceitful people and then the fact I was gay. This had such a huge impact on me causing me to become such an angry person and it took a long time for me to seek help and forgive those who were responsible. I needed to stop judging those who were also in fear and pain as I once was. Trust me it never fully goes away but you have to learn to deal with it and look forward because you really don't have a choice. You can't keep living in the past otherwise there is no future for you. The way I see it is that you live life for yourself not for others as long as you don't hurt anyone along the way with your actions. We are all human and far from perfect so the easiest way to have peace is to accept everyone, no matter what or who they are. You or I don't have a right to judge. We are who we are.
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Shelley A Dewar. Nasty people
Review
Introduction
About me
Why do I think we are gay?
Why the masculine gay woman?
Why the feminine gay woman?
Why the masculine gay man?
Why the feminine gay guy?
Why the Gay Desires?
My Mum
Paul. The biggest bastard of them all!
Noel
John. The man of her dreams
In loving memory of John
My Dad
To My Dad (I miss you)
My Older Sister
My Younger Sister
My Cousin Brian
My Brother
Finding Myself
Lisa
Vagina of death!
Living in fear
Coming out
Back in the closet
You can’t be serious!
It’s Almost Over
My Life Was About To Change
I Couldn’t Help Myself
Goodbye my first love
My up’s and down’s with Sarah
The Roller Coaster Ride
The Knife….Oops!
The Flying Stubby (small beer bottle)
The Arrest
The Restraining Order
Stacey
Making Up
Ironic Jealousy
Backfiring Tranny
Two Months Have Passed
Kim
Carrie
One of the funniest things I have ever seen!
Another Two Months Have Passed
I’m Over It! I really am this time!
I Drove Her to Sell Up
Roger (the tosser) in short
Mandy
Epilogue
Special thanks to
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This book is a frank and honest account of one woman’s foray in and out of love and her determination to get to the truth, no matter what.
You will laugh at the author’s antics, you may shed a tear, and you may think she’s crazy, stupid or both! Either way, you can’t fail to notice how gutsy she is to do the things she does in this book…as gutsy as she is to tell you about them. There’s a little bit of Shelley in all of us I think.
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There were many other instances that happened along the way as you can imagine but these incidents was just to give you an idea of the type of man we were dealing with and how it affected me.
I was so upset I stormed out of the house and went to my best friend’s. This is where I felt safe and could think more clearly. I had to think of what I wanted to do and I eventually came up with a solution.
