Leashes and Lovers - What Your Dog Can Teach You About Love, Life, and Happiness

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Sheryl Matthys. Leashes and Lovers - What Your Dog Can Teach You About Love, Life, and Happiness

FOREWORD

By Bruce Little, DVM

INTRODUCTION

How to Speak Your Dog’s Language

CHAPTER 1

Hand Over Your Leash

The Art of Listening

Handing Over Your Leash: When the Teacher Becomes the Student

CHAPTER 2

The Building Blocks of Communication – “Hip TLC”

Six Qualities You Can Share With Your Dog

• Humility •

• Intimacy •

• Playfulness •

• Trust •

• Loyalty •

• Companionship •

CHAPTER 3

How to Bark When Spoken To

International Dogs – Universal Language

Three Steps for Communicating More Effectively – Without Ever Saying a Word

CHAPTER 4

Know Thy Dog, Know Thyself

Affirmations: I’m Good Enough, I’m Smart Enough, and Doggone It, At Least My Dog Likes Me

Five Reasons To Get to Know Your Dog Better

CHAPTER 5

A Breed for Every Reason – A Dog for Every Season

Attention

Exercise

Companionship

Calmness

Love

The All American: A Word About Mutts

Designer Dogs

CHAPTER 6

Beyond the Breed – What Your Dog Says About You

What’s Your Dog-itude?

Five Tips for Keeping an Eye on Your Dog-itude

CHAPTER 7

Finding and Handling the New Relationship

The Dog-O-Meter: Dating’s New State-of-the-Art Defense!

• Attitude •

• Actions •

• Apathy •

CHAPTER 8

The First Sniff – First Date Impressions

Starting Off on the Right Paw

Where and How to Meet Companions of the Two-Legged Variety

Five Ways to Start Off on the Right Paw

CHAPTER 9

Sniffing Out First Impressions

• Step 1 • Hang Back, Observe, and Do Your Homework

• Step 2 • Approach and Do Reconnaissance

• Step 3 • Have Fun – Or Flee

CHAPTER 10

Merging Doghouses – Steps for Becoming One Happy Pack

Merging Doghouses

Who Let the Dogs Out?

Three’s a Crowd

Grappling with the Greenies: When the Dog or Mate Becomes Jealous

Tackling Jealousy in the Relationship, One Step at a Time

Becoming One Happy Pack

CHAPTER 11

Training to Stay – Sustaining Long-term Relationship Success

For Dogs, Every Day is a Blank Slate (There IS a Lesson Here!)

Life Without Grudges: The Secret to Unconditional Love

Don’t Blame the Fruit – Temptation

When Your Dog Becomes Your Child

Compassion and Kindness Combined with Tough Love

CHAPTER 12

Peeping Fido – The Secrets to Intimacy

Don’t Judge a Book by Its Cover

When 8 is Enough: 4 Feet + 4 Paws = A Dog in the Bed

Snoop Dog: When Fido Sticks Around (A Little Too Long)

Five Tips for Leading a More Intimate, Dog-filled Life

CHAPTER 13

Most of All, Be Happy – Happy Dog, Happy Couple; Happy Couple, Happy Dog

Prescribe DOGS, not DRUGS

Five Tips for ONE HAPPY PACK in and out of the Bedroom

CHAPTER 14

Make Room – Move Over

CHAPTER 15

Who Gets the Dog? – When the Relationship Splits, but the Dog Doesn’t

You Are Not a Pull-Toy: When the Dog is Pulling You Apart

It’s Not You, It’s...Your Dog: When The Dog Becomes a Problem

It’s MY Turn! No, It’s MY Turn! Custody and Visitation After a Breakup

Joint Future

Paper, Rock, Scissors: Who wins?

Five Tips for Dealing with Custody and Visitation

CHAPTER 16

FetchaFriend – Establishing Real Friendships

Can We Love Our Pets Too Much?

Perfection is a Moving Target

A Perfect Match

Break Down Barriers

CHAPTER 17

Mirror, Mirror – Your Relationship with Your Dog is a Reflection of the Stability of Your Human Relationships

Doggone Only Friend

Friends Sans Dogs

Five Tips for Leading a Stable, Solid, and Happy Dog-filled Life

CHAPTER 18

Bloodlines and Bloodhounds – We Are Family

It’s Not in the Genes

Bona Fide Beyond Belief

When Your Family “Just Isn’t Into” Your Dog: Time for a Breakup?

When a (Dog Lover’s) Family is United, It’s “Til Death Do You Part”

Hello, My Name is... Social Dog, Social Family

The Five Biggest Challenges Dog Lovers Face When Bringing Fido Home

CHAPTER 19

Compromise is “Key” When You’re Composing a Family Harmony

There is Hope: If MY Family Can Do It, Anyone Can

The 3 Rs – Responsibilities, Rewards and Recognition

Memorialized: When Fido Vies for Space in Your Heart

Five Tips for Being Part of a Happy Pack

Final Chapter in More Ways Than One

EPILOGUE

Love, Life, and Happiness – Unleash Your Dog

Counting On Us

Don’t Stop Now: Fetch a Friend Instead!

PHOTO CREDITS

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Sheryl Matthys, The Dog Expert

CONTACT INFORMATION

Отрывок из книги

As a typical youth in pre-World War II rural America, I was aware that the value placed on dogs was based on the work that each could perform. Sheep and cattle dogs helped protect the flocks and herds. Barn dogs protected the chickens and baby animals from foxes and coyotes, and yard dogs served as security to prevent skunks, rodents and other varmints from setting up housekeeping under the farmhouse porch. These dogs were basically outside dogs that seldom had the opportunity to gain admittance to the warm and cozy confides of the family home, except on occasions of extremely harsh winter weather or the stifling heat of the dog-days of summer. These are the dogs that I knew as a child and young adult in rural America.

Fortunately, the fate of the dog has changed appreciably from those humble surroundings of my childhood. The accelerated rate of the post-World War II urbanization of America has changed the purpose of the dog and has moved them inside the home as trusted companions of family members. Many dogs now even sleep with members of the family. As a practicing veterinarian in the 60s and 70s, I began to see and follow the value being placed on the family dog by all members of society. Sight and hearing dogs were the norm, as were police and military dogs that served a purpose beyond just being a best friend. I had clients in my veterinary practice who realized the value in their dog’s presence from warnings of oncoming thunderstorms to the unconditional love displayed by the family dog as a companion to a young recipient in a much deserved “time-out.” The dog’s love and attention never wavered. Dogs have been trained to pick up toys and place them on a tray for physically or mentally challenged toddlers, and dogs have been used to train prisoners and juvenile delinquents about the need for love and nurturing. In many of these scenarios the answer was found in the relationship formed between the family member and the dog.

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Dogs don’t hide anything. Dogs don’t rationalize. Just like children, they are direct in what they do and need and feel. They are honest to the core about their needs, wants, and desires; they know no other way. Yes, we are a more socialized being, acting properly in social situations and not biting or growling when someone or something is bothering us. But we’re a long way from living honestly. We argue with a spouse over whose turn it is to take out the garbage or about spending money we don’t have, when we both know those are symptoms of a bigger problem. It’s usually what we’re not mentioning and what we’re not listening to that is the crux of the matter. Often we over-rationalize.

How do we achieve a more dog-like honesty? It’s a matter of simplifying life and finding the truth within us. Before responding to a situation with a knee jerk reaction, stop and think about how the serene dog would react to the matter at hand. What would your dog do? Probably not overreact, but rather react to the extent that the situation calls for – nothing more, nothing less.

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