Читать книгу Hear or See? Play on 10,9,8 or 7 people. Fantasy. Drama (and oddly enough) Comedy - Николай Лакутин - Страница 4

ACT ONE
OFFICE

Оглавление

A small office sofa for visitors, on which, snoring, huddles heavy driver Gennady. Work desks, laptops at which the Manager Yuri and logistician Anton sit impressively, they are interested in a computer game of tanks, play with each other over the network. The noise of gunfire and the roar of engines comes from their computers. Accountant Natalia is engaged in pedicure, throwing her bare foot on her Desk, carefully displays the coating on her nails, while talking on a mobile phone with a friend, holding the phone with her shoulder to her ear. With all this, the working phone tube is torn, but there is no one to take it, everyone is "very busy".

Finally, Natalia can't stand it, glancing at the work phone several times and looking around, then picks up the phone.

NATALIA: (politely to your mobile) snezhinochka, could you wait a second. The phone is ringing under my ear, I can't hear you at all.

He puts down his mobile phone and puts the work phone to his ear.

NATALIA: (sternly, defiantly, boorishly) Yes! What do you want?

He listens to the phone, looks in the direction of the guys who are engaged in the game, turns to the phone.

NATALIA: (sternly, defiantly, boorishly) Yuri can't come to the phone right now, he has it… negotiations!

He listens to the phone, looks in the direction of the guys who are engaged in the game, turns to the phone.

NATALIA: (sternly, defiantly, boorishly) Anton is also busy right now. Do you think we sit around here all day waiting for your call? Avral, that you as a small! Call back in a minute… two hours.

Natalia looks doubtfully at the guys, who only begin to beat their fingers harder on the keyboard, their enthusiasm only increases.

NATALIA: (already moderately, without irritation) Although you know, call back better later in the evening, or even better tomorrow morning. I'll tell them you called, and if they're free, they'll call you back early. Good day.

Natalya hangs up, shakes her head in disapproval, and shouts at the guys.

NATALIA: Yura!

From the scream, the driver shudders on the couch, marking his experience of this gadfly with a particularly loud snore.

One of the guys reluctantly turns to Natalia.

NATALIA: (angrily) Yura, my e-my, I'm an accountant, not a Manager, why do your clients call me all the time, distract from work!

There is an explosive, furious, victorious laugh from Anton, who jumps up from his chair and gestures humiliatingly (preferably decently) at Yuri.

ANTON: (as emotionally as possible) That's it, baby, Yes!!! Ukontrapupil Gavrik. As to drink give otchekryzhil on one-two! On!!!

Yuri looks at his monitor in panic, realizes that he has lost, jumps out of the chair in horror, and starts yelling at Natalia.

YURI: (furiously, accompanying gestures) Natasha, mother peremat, to vymat to perejimati!!! Why are you distracting me at a time like this? I almost made it! And that you! (Brutally, inflating the veins on his neck from straining) Yyyyyyyyyyyyy!

NATALIA: (Yelling at Yuri) you deal with your clients first, then you will fill the Antonin hangar with your ammunition! You don't get any accounting calls, and I'm sick of your clients! Petropavlovsk called again, they still haven't received the cargo!

(turns to Anton, shouting) you, by the way, Antoshenka also concerns!

Anton stops making faces and dancing, which has been busy until now.

ANTON: I mean, Petropavlovsk. We shipped them everything two weeks ago.

NATALIA: (angrily, to Anton) Two weeks ago, this question was already removed a long time ago. They sent a new request, the invoice was issued and paid ten days ago. Have you forgotten?

Natalia looks in the direction of the sleeping driver.

NATALIA: (to the driver) Gennady, did you take the goods to the transport company in Petropavlovsk?

The driver is not responding, sleeping.

Natalya waves her hand in his direction.

YURI: (Natalia) what's on the bill? By what amount, from what date?

Yuri reaches into his laptop.

NATALIA: (to Yuri) there are two hundred and something thousand, I don't remember exactly. Look at the last bill from them.

Anton also goes to his laptop, looking for something there.

Natalia picks up her mobile phone, clips it back between her shoulder and ear and continues her pedicure session.

NATALIA: (into the phone, gently) yeah, Snezan. So what's up with that dog of yours?

Then he listens to the phone, nods, and paints his toenails.

Plays loud rhythmic music of a panicky nature (recommended Intro to " hymn of the fool»)

All office workers are scared.

The driver jumps like a scalded cat from the couch, rushes, runs to the side of the cooler. His face is sleepy and swollen (you may need makeup).

Yuri and Anton jump up from their seats, grab their heads, frantically start pounding on the computer keyboard, disconnect some cables, hide game disks, some records and magazines under the table, jump on their chairs, "stick their noses" in laptops, create the appearance of work.

Natalia with fright falls from her chair upside down, somewhere at the table, while only her painted leg remains in the field of view (to provide a soft safe fall).

A stern-looking Philip enters the office, dressed in a suit and holding a mobile phone. In the other hand, a work bag. Presses the phone button, the thundering music stops abruptly (the panic music is the soundtrack set as Philip's mobile phone ring).

Philip puts the phone to his ear.

PHILIP: (into the phone, sternly, loudly) Hello? Yes! Ya With me can agree on. What volumes are you interested in? (listens, expresses rejection on his face) Why are you calling me with your hundred kilos, we are a wholesale company, we work from a ton. Well, we can put five hundred kilos in exceptional cases, but no one will bother with a hundred here. You are welcome. Total…

Hang up. Dissatisfied with the situation in the office.

The driver is drinking water from a single Cup, squinting in the direction of Philip, trying to remain unnoticed.

Accountant Natalia rummaged under the table, trying to quickly put on shoes and quickly remove all unnecessary attributes of cosmetics.

Yuri and Anton casually, distracted from the pile of work, pay attention to the fact that the Director is in the office.

ANTON: (to Philip, as if surprised) Oh, Philip Georgievich! What are your fates? You were supposed to be on a business trip…

YURI: (to Philip) Good afternoon, comrade Director, what a pleasant surprise. And here we are already missing you. The office is boring, no one knows how to joke like you, everyone is sitting rotten stunted, but the work is really in full swing, here… from Petropavlovsk the order was knocked out for two hundred s …something like that. Snatched it can be said from the hands of competitors.

PHILIP: (to Yuri, sternly) what kind of order Is this? Which they paid for ten days ago?

YURI: (to Philip) Well… (improbably, wagging) they paid, then wanted to refuse, there someone offered them better terms, but in the end, thanks to my assertiveness and eloquence, we did not lose the client. All for the good of the company, Philip Georgievich, we try, we work!

Philip looks at Anton.

ANTON: (to Philip, nodding) yeah. All right. We work like hell.

PHILIP: (to Yuri and Anton) Well, I look, my eyes are so red. As if the day from the monitor did not leave. You at least have a rest sometimes, you can't do that either. There are, after all, regulations. No more than two hours in a row, then a fifteen-minute break. Have a Cup of tea, I've just brought it with me. I got off early, and the negotiations were easy.

Philip goes to the accountant's Desk, puts out sweets and cookies, and notices that Natalia is rummaging under the table.

Philip leans across the table and looks down at the accountant.

PHILIP: (Natalia) Good afternoon, Natalia Viktorovna!

Natalya looks out from under the table, confused.

NATALIA: (playfully) Hello, Philip Georgievich. Well, don't be so formal, Natalia Viktorovna…

PHILIP: (smiling) That's just me, which you can't say in a joke conversation.

All the employees of the office start laughing hard at once. The Director draws attention to the driver, who inadvertently gave himself away with a laugh.

PHILIP: (seriously) I Don't understand. Gennadievich. What are you doing here? Are you the driver or where? You've got a delivery schedule that's two weeks in advance, and everyone's pushing the deadline, and you're just hanging out here…

GENNADIEVICH: (stammering) Yes… Yes, I literally stabilizability to drink went. All in deliveries, working hard, and no honor! Why are you so quick, Philip Georgievich?

PHILIP: (to Gennadievich) does it mean to drink some Water? And why is the muzzle all swollen out and crumpled? Not from a dream?

Gennadievich makes a humble face, lowers his hands, lowers his head in agony.

GENNADIEVICH: (pitifully) I'm Plump with hunger, Philip Georgievich, I didn't want to say, but since you asked. My salary is not so great, as you know, utilities are getting more expensive. I'm not eating enough… result on the face. And dented – so it was in the transport company in the queue brawl was. I have a lot of cargo, so one of them in the queue lost his nerve. They dented me a little. I suffer, I don't regret my stomach, Philip Georgievich, but you treat me like this… like me… I'm ashamed to say it…

Colleagues shut their mouths, trying to cover themselves in every possible way and not give away their laughter from the skilful twisting of the driver out of the situation. And yet the laughter sometimes slips from colleagues.

PHILIP: (to everyone, apologetically) well, what's so funny? The man over there didn't get hurt for anything. Here's a bonus for you, Gennadievich (takes a wad of money out of his pocket, counts it out, gives the driver a nice pile of cash) you're doing a good job, I'm sorry if I said something wrong.

Gennady as if reluctantly, shy, accepts the money.

GENNADIEVICH: (plaintively, to the Director) I will go, perhaps, there is still a lot to do.

PHILIP: (to the driver) Can we have a Cup of tea? You won't get enough of water. And so you see… swell…

GENNADIEVICH: Thank you, Philip Georgievich, I'll have something to eat on the way, there's money now (shows everyone the bonuses received, colleagues look at the driver with indignation). I won't waste any time. We are all considered to be one family, we work in the same pot, if someone gives us a slack, we will all feel a drawdown.

Philip is moved, wipes a tear from his eye, hugs the driver, and pats him on the shoulder.

PHILIP: (to the driver) Come on, Gennady, take care of yourself. We need you and your family… Don't worry too much about it.

Gennadievich gives the Director a friendly and respectful nod and leaves the office with a grimace of a modest hero.

PHILIP: (to all the rest, cheerfully, positively) Well…, for a Cup of tea?

Plays loud positive music (recommended by Passion Fruit "The Ring Ding Dong Song").

Colleagues on the rise begin to approach the table, cheerfully and joyfully dancing, carrying their mugs, Philip unpacks Goodies, a pleasant organizational moment is coming.

ZTM.

Hear or See? Play on 10,9,8 or 7 people. Fantasy. Drama (and oddly enough) Comedy

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