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IF YOU REALLY want to win, you have to begin. I’ve always agreed with what I heard my friend and fellow speaker Joe Sabah say: “You don’t have to be great to get started, but you do have to start to be great.” This means you have to be before you can do, and do before you can have. That probably sounds simple enough, but there is a lot more involved in that statement than you might think. That statement really captures the core issues that are connected to being successful. When you understand what these three little words (be, do, have) mean, you will view success in an entirely new way—and ultimately change the world!
As we look at the game of life. I want to emphasize a couple of things. I personally believe that most of us have certain drives, hopes, and ambitions in life. I believe that each of us, whether we are female or male, young or old, black or white, short or tall, big or slim, have the desire to make a difference. I also believe you will agree that most people are interested in health, prosperity, happiness, friends, peace, and security.
Let me ask you a question. What is your definition of success? And do you know what success is and what it isn’t? Most people think of success in terms of power or recognition or the accumulation of money and material things. They also try to define it with one sentence or capture it with one central idea. True success has more components than one sentence or idea can contain.
For years I have been using a graphic to help people “see” where they are already successful and where they need help. I call it “The Wheel of Life.” I could not write this book without sharing this graph that has made such a difference in so many lives. This graph will help you “see” where you really are in the game of life. It gives you a starting point as you move forward. In other words, you have to know where you are in order to know where you’re going.
Each of the seven spokes in the wheel represents a specific area of life. The seven spokes of that wheel are:
Physical
Family
Mental
Financial
Personal
Spiritual
Career
You must master some degree of success in each area of life before you can experience the true satisfaction of total success. Every spoke in your Wheel of Life is connected to the other spokes in the wheel. If one or more of the spokes is neglected, the others are also weakened. On the other hand, as you strengthen these weak areas, the other areas become stronger as well. Think of it like each area working together as a team, and the team is only as strong as its weakest link. Let me give you an example. If you just focus on career success and neglect family and spiritual growth, you will not be as successful in your professional life as you hope to be. If you make a lot of money and don’t take care of your health, you might become a chronically ill wealthy person! You will clearly understand what I’m saying by understanding what success is and what it isn’t. Here’s a short list of the characteristics of what I believe success isn’t and what I believe success is. Let’s start with what success is.
WHAT SUCCESS IS
1 Success is knowing that you did a great job when you close the door to your office at the end of each workday and head for home.
2 Success is having a home and people to love who love you in return.
3 Success is having the financial security to meet your obligations each month and the knowledge that you have provided that security for your family in the event of your demise.
4 Success is having the kind of faith that lets you know where to turn when there seems to be no place to turn.
5 Success is having an interest or hobby that gives you joy and peace.
6 Success is knowing who you are, and Whose youare.
7 Success is taking good care of you and waking up healthy each day.
8 Success is slipping under the covers at the end of the day and realizing with gratitude that, “It just doesn’t get much better than this!”
You see from this list that success is more than a one sentence definition. Success involves the whole person, and if you skimp on one area, you will limit your success in others. Now, let’s take a look at what success isn’t.
WHAT SUCCESS ISN’T
1 Success isn’t missing dinner with the family several times a week because of working excessively.
2 Success isn’t rushing home from work and hiding out with the TV thinking, “After the day I’ve had, I need my space!”
3 Success isn’t about how to make more money when you already have more money than you can spend.
4 Success isn’t about going to church and ignoring everything you hear.
5 Success isn’t all work and no play.
6 Success isn’t about being so busy that you live on unhealthy fast food served to you through little windows.
7 Success isn’t spending mental energy worrying about late projects, being home on time, your health, missing your child’s school play, being able to pay your bills, or finding joy in your life.
8 Success isn’t texting while you drive to catch up on your overloaded schedule.
Do any of the symptoms on this list sound familiar to you? Have you noticed one or more of them in your own life? If you answered yes to any of these questions, I can tell you that your Wheel of Life needs close attention and some extra work in those areas!
YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU
As you look at the part that relationships play in your life, think about yourself. What is your relationship with yourself? Do you like who you are? If not, what are you doing about it? When I say that you have to be before you can do, and do before you can have, notice that I said you in front of be, do, and have. This is because I’m talking about the relationship you have with yourself and how it translates into you having the things in life that constitute success. I want to help you get acquainted with who you really are and share some things with you that will help you grow to like yourself better. It’s important that you like yourself, because if you don’t, who will?
Your ability to get along with other people is an indication of who you are and how you feel about yourself. You have to be the kind of person with whom you and others are comfortable. The more you respect yourself, the higher the standards you set and the greater your integrity which enables you to do the right things. When you do the right things, you are more likely to have good relationships with others, and more success in general.
LAYING THE FOUNDATION
There are six characteristics that comprise the foundation stones of your life and your success. The six characteristics are honesty, character, faith, integrity, love, and loyalty. All of these foundation stones are necessary to create a Wheel of Life that is balanced and will produce the kind of success I’ve described. In my eighty-five years of living I have learned that people who compromise any of these principles usually end up with only a beggar’s portion of what life offers them. I’ve seen people acquire money through dishonesty and deceit, but their friends are few and they lack true peace of mind. The business professional who alienates his family in his climb to the top is not a success. People who have no faith in something greater than themselves can only rely on themselves in times of great difficulty. The longer I live and the more successful people I meet, the more convinced I become that these foundation stones are the most critical success weapons you have in your arsenal.
