Читать книгу In the Tudor Court Collection - Amanda McCabe - Страница 27

‘Why didn’t you tell me that you were Sylvester’s woman?’ Peg said when Maribel mentioned that he was sending someone to take her to his house and to fetch her trunk later that day. ‘You would not have needed to help with the chores if I’d known you were special to him.’

‘I did not mind helping,’ Maribel said and blushed. ‘It is good to understand what other people have to do.’

‘Show me your hands.’ Maribel held them out and Peg frowned as she saw the red marks on the palms. ‘You should have told me that you had never done hard work. I should not have asked you to carry water from the well if I had known. I’ll give you some salve for your hands.’ Her eyes narrowed. ‘It’s the first time I’ve known Sylvester to take a woman under his protection. You must have made an impression on him! There will be some jealous females once‘ tis known you’ve done what none other could.’ Peg grinned suddenly. ‘What is he like as a lover? I’ve thought many a time I would be happy to lie with such a man!’ She threw back her head and laughed as Maribel flushed. ‘I thought not! You have not lain in his bed, have you? He is protecting you from scum like Pike.’

‘Why do you say that?’ Maribel looked at her.

‘You are innocent, child. Anyone with sense can see it in your eyes. Besides, I know his heart is in the grave of the woman he loved.’

‘He has told you this?’ Maribel felt as if a knife had entered her breast, because to hear it from Peg seemed to make the woman real instead of the shadowy person Justin had mentioned in passing. ‘He has spoken to you of this woman—you know who she was?’

‘That I cannot reveal without telling his secret,’ Peg said. ‘Before I came here I was a servant in a big house. When I killed the rat that raped me I should have hanged had it not been for Sylvester. He took me from the hellhole I was locked in and set me free. I escaped to sea with a man I cared for. I know that Sylvester’s heart was broken when the woman he was to marry died of a fever a few days before their wedding…and if you tell him that I revealed so much I’ll slit your throat myself!’

He had lost his love shortly before his wedding day. It was not surprising that he could never think of putting another woman in her place. Maribel felt a flow of sympathy for him, feeling his hurt and the pain it must have caused him. In that moment she wanted to put her arms about him and kiss away all the grief and pain, to make him whole again. She knew how it felt to lose someone you loved and she had loved Pablo as a brother. How would it feel to lose someone who meant so much more—someone who was a part of you?

‘I swear I shall not reveal what you have told me.’ Maribel said. Her heartbeat had returned to normal. Peg had told her something so revealing that she thought it had begun to explain the mystery that was Captain Justin Sylvester. Sylvester was not his true name. He had come from a respectable family, from what Peg had hinted, perhaps a great family.

The mystery was deep and she might never reach the bottom of it, but Maribel suspected that she might be falling deeply in love with the man himself. He was a gentleman despite his present situation. He was also a man of honour.

Why did he believe he could not return to his homeland? What had he done that was so terrible?

She knew that he could be harsh. It was necessary to discipline the men that served with him. Yet he could also be compassionate and honourable.

Maribel’s heart ached as she saw to the packing of her own trunk for the move to Justin’s house. Being here on the island had caused her to lose so many inhibitions that she had had before being taken captive. When she first left for England she had been very much the correct Spanish lady. She was not certain who she was any more. Maribel was not sure that she would ever be able to give orders to a servant in the way she once had, taking it for granted that they should obey her every whim, though she would be expected to do so once she was living with her English family.

If only there was another way to live! One that was possible for her. She did not think that she could be happy living on the island, because the pirates were dangerous, coarse men and she would always fear most of them. Yet to return to the kind of life she had known in her father’s house would be hard.

She thought that she would like to live simply in a modest house, somewhere in the country—perhaps a farm—but with whom? One face filled her mind, but she struggled to push it away. To dream of such happiness was foolish.

Justin Sylvester was not looking to settle to a quiet life. He might desire Maribel, but he did not love her. He did not wish for a wife, merely a mistress to lie with when it suited him.

Blinking back her tears, Maribel dressed herself in a thin shift, one petticoat and the thinnest gown she possessed. She looked respectable, because her hair was disciplined into the ringlets she had worn at home. She had teased her comb into her tangled hair, curling it about her fingers. The effect was not quite as neat as when Anna dressed her hair, but she did not look like the wanton hoyden Justin had rescued from that vile man.

Lifting her head, Maribel glanced at herself in her tiny silver-backed mirror. She vaguely resembled the formal lady that had first set sail for England, though she knew that inside she was very different. She had been living inside a shell, in a cold dark place and barely alive. Now she was aware of her feelings, aware of pain and love and a need that she scarcely understood.

Maribel glanced round the room she had been given. It was furnished with an impressive tester bed of Spanish hardwood and hung with silken drapes. Other hutches made of a similar wood, a stool, and a cupboard on a carved stand had been provided for her comfort. She wondered where and how Justin had come by such fine items. They must either have been captured from Spanish vessels or brought here at some cost—perhaps both. A trunk with iron bands had been delivered and when Maribel opened the lid she discovered the gowns and undergarments she had been promised. They were of such fine silk that she knew they must have been extremely costly. Because of their light weight she knew that they would be much more comfortable than the heavier gowns she had prepared for her trousseau. She had deliberately chosen heavy materials because she had been told she would need them in the cooler climate of England.

She was finding herself more and more reluctant to complete her journey to the home of her mother’s family. Yet what else was there for her? If she gave herself to Justin without marriage, she would indeed be a whore. What if he tired of her? Where would she go and what would she do then?

The questions weighed heavily on her mind. Her heart was telling her that even a short time as his woman—to lie in his arms and experience his loving—would be worth losing her honour. However, her mind reminded her that she was a lady and gently born. Her father might be a tyrant and a murderer, but her mother was undoubtedly a lady. If she gave up honour for love, she could never return to the life she was meant to live. She would be an outcast and might one day be forced to earn her living on her back. Yet she was not even sure that she had a family who would take her in, though Juanita had told her that she had an uncle in England and named him. She had received no letters from him. Perhaps he would not wish to know her.

Maribel’s tortured thoughts were scattered as Anna came into the room bearing clean linen for the bed.

‘This is a fine house,’ Anna told her. ‘True it is built mainly of wood, but the foundations are set on stone. It should withstand the worst of winter storms.’

‘Yes, it is stout enough.’ Maribel gave a little shiver. ‘I should not want to live here all the time. Are you sure you wish to settle here, Anna? If you change your mind, you will have a place with me—if my family can be found and will accept me.’

‘I thank you, my lady, but in England I should always be a servant. Here I can be my own person.’

‘Surely you and Higgins could have an inn or a shop of your own in England?’

‘It would not be the same. You have always been a lady. You do not know what it is like for the people who serve you. The laws are harsh in Spain for such as us, and Higgins says it is the same in England. A man can be hung for stealing game from the woods, even if he only did so to save his family from starvation. Besides, Higgins would be hanged as a mutineer if he returned to his home country. If he cannot live there nor shall I.’

Anna’s words struck home. Maribel had been spoiled in some ways, for she had been waited on and given fine clothes and good food, but in other ways she had been poor. She had never known her father’s love or felt her mother’s arms about her. Juanita had been good to her, but after her death Maribel had felt alone and at times unhappy. She would not wish to return to a life like that—in Spain or England.

She sighed. ‘Is there no country on this earth where a man can be free from such harsh laws? I know you say there is freedom on the island, but the men here…’ She shook her head. ‘I do not care for men like Pike or pirates.’ Save one, her heart said, but she would not voice her true feelings for the man she knew would never love her. Peg had told her that his heart belonged to the woman he had meant to marry. Justin had told her himself that he had no intention of taking a wife.

‘Well,’ tis what I have chosen,’ Anna said. ‘The life may not be perfect, but I have no family waiting for me in England. I would not wish to return to Spain—I should have nothing to look forward to there.’

‘You must do as you please, but I could not live here—even though this house is well enough for a short visit.’

Maribel said the words carelessly, though it was not the house that she found lacking, merely the knowledge that she did not belong on this island.

Justin paused outside the open door and listened to the conversation between the two women inside. He had come to ask if Maribel had all that she required, but he had his answer. It had cost him far more than he had intended to spend to furnish the house to a standard he considered suitable for her use. In his foolish desire to please, he had imagined that she would understand that he had provided the best the island had to offer. It seemed that she found it lacking—as she had found him lacking.

He had given her his first name as a proof that he was willing to lower the barriers between them. Yet now he was glad that he had not revealed his other secrets to her. She did not care for pirates—or their captain presumably. It had seemed to him that she was warming towards him…that she felt something of the passion her beauty aroused in him—but it would seem that he had deceived himself.

She was willing to accept his hospitality for a short visit, because she knew that she would be safe beneath his roof. Clearly she could hardly wait for their stay on the island to be over so that she could continue her journey to England and the family that awaited her.

Frowning, Justin walked away. He had business enough to keep him occupied. His crew wanted only gold or silver that they could spend, which meant that he must bargain with the merchants and other captains for the best prices for the goods they had taken. The chests of silver had already been divided according to the rules of the brethren. He had spent much of his captain’s share, which was the largest, but still only a portion of that taken. Each man was paid according to his standing, and even Tom the cabin boy now had more money than he could have earned in ten years before the mast. If he took care of his share, he could be a rich man in another year or so—they all could be if they continued to be as lucky as they had been this trip.

Justin had wondered if his share would buy him a new life somewhere. Not here on the island. The money he had spent here could be recouped when he left, or at least a part of it; he might not get back all for he knew he had spent recklessly to buy things of quality for Maribel. Yet where could he go to start this new life?

Maribel had asked where on this earth there was a country where the laws were fair to all men. Not a pirates’ haven, but a land where a man could breathe and make a fine life for himself and his family.

Anna had not known how to answer her and Justin did not know either. He had left England under a cloud for speaking his mind. He had neither spoken nor committed treason. However, just for voicing his opinion that it was wrong to send a man to the fire simply because he followed a different religion, he could have been condemned as a traitor and executed. Perhaps if the old queen were dead he might have found a better life…but not with the stain of piracy hanging over him. His father would not accept him. He would accuse him of bringing shame to their name and it was true.

So if he could not return to England, where would he find the life he craved? Not in Spain and perhaps not in France—his cousins might also think he had brought shame on them. Justin would have to think again. There must surely be a country where he could find the life and the freedom he craved…

Maribel saw him chopping wood in the yard at the back of the house. Justin had taken off his shirt and his skin glistened with sweat. His body was tanned and his strong muscles rippled as he worked. Her eyes fastened on him hungrily and she was aware of heat spreading through her from low in her abdomen. He was beautiful and she wanted to touch him, to run her hands over his back and touch the scars she thought must have come from cruel whips when he served before the mast. No wonder he had taken the law into his own hands. The master of that ship deserved to lose his position! Yet it had made Justin something he had no wish to be, an exile from the law and his home. For the first time Maribel began to understand why a man might become a pirate. She watched him a little longer from her window. Justin was working so hard, attacking the wood as if it were his enemy. She thought he must be angry for his actions seemed those of a man bent on spending his frustration in work and there was surely no need for so much kindling.

Picking up the hat with a wide brim that he had so thoughtfully provided, Maribel put it on and fastened it to her hair with silver pins. She went out of the house, hearing the rustle of her skirts and relishing the feel of the silky material against her flesh. She had never worn anything as fine as this and thought that even her stepmother had not owned silk as costly as she was wearing now.

Justin looked up as she approached. He scowled at her, reaching for his shirt. ‘Forgive me. You should not have come out. I am not properly dressed.’

‘I saw you from the house. You were working so hard. I wanted to thank you for my clothes. They are so light and comfortable. I have never worn anything as fine.’

‘I am sure you must have…’

‘No, sir, I have not. My gowns were always heavier and thicker. Even my stepmother never had such fine silk as you have given me. I am grateful for your thoughtfulness…and for the room you have provided.’

‘The furnishings are not what you are used to,’ he growled. ‘But all I could find here.’

‘I thought it very comfortable. I am grateful for all you have done for me, sir.’

‘I am aware that my house lacks the comforts you were accustomed to, lady. Well enough for a short stay, but not for long. I shall endeavour to see you safe in the arms of your family as soon as it may be done.’

‘You heard me…’ Maribel’s cheeks burned as she realised she had been overheard. Shame washed over her, for she had been ungrateful and hasty. ‘When I spoke to Anna it was not of you or your house, Justin. It is merely that I do not find the island a pleasant place…’ She saw his expression and stopped. ‘I would not have offended you for the world, sir. I believe I owe you more than I can ever repay. It is just that I feel uncomfortable because of what happened with Pike—and what could happen if I left your house to go walking or visit the merchants.’

‘Do not judge us too harshly, Maribel. It is true that men like Pike are to be avoided, but many of those who live here would not harm you, especially now they believe you belong to me. You have not seen the rest of the island. The port is a shambles, I grant you, but the community is young and the town is not yet built. The island has become a safe haven for pirates and their kind, but one day it may be something more. As people make their homes here it will become a proper community. I think it might be possible to have a good life here—if one were willing to accept it for what it is.’

‘I should not have spoken so carelessly to Anna. I have received no harm at your hands, sir.’ She turned away, walking back towards the house, her head down. A moment later she felt her arm caught and looked at Justin. He had put on his shirt and his expression had lightened.

‘No, do not leave, Maribel. The other side of the island, away from the port, is beautiful…perhaps as paradise must have been before we humans spoiled it.’

‘I should like to visit this paradise you speak of…if it may be arranged.’

‘The interior of the island is hilly, covered in woods, and you would not enjoy the walk in this heat. I could arrange for us to be rowed there—perhaps one day soon. There are other things to enjoy here. This evening there will be a feast and then the division of the spoils. Would you care to attend the feasting? I must do so and I would prefer that you be there so that I can watch over you.’

‘I think I am a deal of trouble to you, sir.’ She hung her head, feeling ashamed that she had given him cause to think her ungrateful. ‘You have been generous…more so than I could ever have expected.’

‘I have given you my word that I will deliver you safely to your family, lady. I shall endeavour to keep it. If you do not wish to attend the feasting tonight, I shall ask you to stay inside and lock your door.’

‘Thank you, I should like to attend. I think I am safe enough if you are there, sir.’

‘You know that I would never allow anyone to harm you while I live.’ Justin hesitated, then, ‘Would it be too much to ask you to call me by my name? I should like to think we had gone beyond the formality of sir…’

‘I owe my life to you. If you wish it, I shall call you, Sylvester, as you are known here. You gave me your first name, but I think you may not wish others to know it?’

‘I once had hopes of returning to my home, but I doubt it will happen.’ Justin’s eyes clouded, his mouth thinning. ‘You owe me no gratitude, Maribel. Had we not attacked your ship the first time you might have been in England.’

‘And perhaps wed to a man I hated.’ She shuddered. ‘I think I should thank you, Sylvester. I resented being your captive, but I was proud and foolish, and afraid. I misjudged you and I am sorry. Perhaps one day I may do something for you in return.’

‘I ask for nothing.’ He inclined his head. ‘Excuse me, I have things I must do. You need not stay in the house; you are safe enough here in the garden, such as it is. I have been meaning to clear some of the undergrowth at the back so that a fruit garden can be planted, but as yet I have not had time. Be careful if you stray further. I do not think anyone will attempt what Pike did…but, as you know, these men are not always to be trusted.’

Maribel watched as he walked away from her. The barriers had come down as soon as she spoke of his name and reminded him of his home—and the woman he had loved. Clearly such memories pained him. He must have loved her very much…still loved her if it could cause the shadows to fall. He was a man and had a man’s needs. He might desire Maribel, but his heart still belonged to a woman he had once loved.

She was foolish to think of him! He had sworn to protect her but that was all. Maribel began to realise something her heart had tried to tell her long ago. Justin was an exceptional man and she was beginning to feel things for him that she could scarcely understand. He had been kind to her, but she had rebuffed him and it would serve her right if he abandoned her to her fate.

Maribel knew that she must make the best of her stay here. She could only hope that it would not be too long before the ship was ready to sail. In the meantime, she would make herself useful in the house. Some large chests had been delivered earlier and she knew they contained things for Justin’s house. He was so busy that he had no time to unpack them. She would do it for him.

Maribel spent an hour or more unpacking items of value from the sturdy oak trunks that had been set down in the living room. She discovered porcelain the like of which she had never seen and stared at the markings on the underneath, trying to make out the strange figures. Beautiful blue-and-white designs depicting figures dressed in clothes that seemed different to her. She imagined they must be very costly and thought that they rightly belonged in the chamber destined for the master of the house.

She sought and found Justin’s bedroom, discovering that his bed was much plainer than the one he had given her. Here there were no fancy hutches or carved stools, but just his sea chest and a plain stool with three legs. She set the vase down in a corner of the room, looking round as she thought that something more was needed here to make it comfortable. Noticing some stained linen, she picked it up intending to wash it for him. She was about to leave when she heard a sound and turned to find Justin looking at her.

‘What are you doing?’

‘I unpacked the chest you had sent here. That vase was so beautiful I thought it belonged in your room. I have never seen its like. Where did it come from?’

‘I believe China. It was taken from a Portuguese merchant vessel. I have been told that the Portuguese have trading arrangements with China that no other country has and vases such as these are rare—beyond price. It does not belong here and should have been left in the trunk to protect it.’

‘Forgive me. I thought you would wish these things unpacked. I shall replace it…’

‘No, leave it now. This room is bare. I dare say it will come to no harm.’ He frowned as he saw the linen in her arms. ‘What are you doing with those shirts?’

‘I meant to wash them for you. It is little enough in return for all you have given me and I have time on my hands.’

‘You will ruin your hands,’ he said and took them from her, tossing them on to the bed. ‘Tom will see to them for me. It is one of his tasks as cabin boy to care for the men’s clothes.’

‘I feel so useless. Everyone else has work to do.’

‘If you wish for work, there is some mending. A lady’s hands were not meant for menial tasks, but I believe needlework is acceptable?’

‘Yes, of course…’ Maribel was hesitant. ‘I did not think it right that I should do nothing. I am sorry I unpacked the chest if you did not wish it.’

Justin reached out and caught her wrist, as she would have turned away. She raised her head, holding back the tears that would shame her, but he saw them and reached out to touch her cheek with his fingertips.

‘Forgive me. It looks very much better in here. I did not mean to be harsh to you, Maribel. We should try to deal more kindly with each other for the time we spend on the island. I know there are things here that you cannot like, but it is not such a bad place—is it?’

‘No…’ She blinked away the foolish tears and smiled at him. ‘The view to the sea is breathtaking and some of the flowers are lovely. I should have asked before I touched your belongings, but I wanted to be useful. There is no place for a lady here.’

‘I should have remembered that you would need some employment. I will purchase silks another day and then you may use your skills to mend or embroider some trifle.’

Maribel turned away. He thought her good for nothing but idleness or some embroidery! At home she had been used to many tasks—she had helped Juanita in the stillroom and with mending, as well as embroidering covers and hangings for the house and the church. There had always been a task of some kind, though she saw now that much of her time had been spent in idleness, either walking in the gardens, riding or playing her viola.

What had she ever done of real use? If her husband had not died, she would have been mistress of his house, but in her father’s she had been nothing—just the daughter of a woman it seemed he hated.

What would she be in the house of her English relatives? Perhaps they would give her some tasks to perform for her keep?

Maribel was aware of a growing unease in her mind. She was not sure of her welcome in England. Even if her mother’s family accepted her, she could only be an outsider at best, for she did not truly belong with them.

Where did she belong? The answer was nowhere. Anna would be accepted here, because she shared the work they all did—but Maribel was too much of a lady to do hard physical work and so she could never belong.

Returning to her own room, Maribel spent the rest of the afternoon staring out of the window and watching birds flitting in and out of the trees. She had nothing to occupy her time and wished for some needlework or canvas and paint so that she might have something to make the hours seem shorter.

As dusk began to fall, she saw Anna at the well. She filled one bucket and left the other while she carried that back to the house. Maribel went out and tied the other bucket to the rope, letting it down until she heard the splash of water. She had begun to wind the handle to bring it up when Anna returned.

‘You should not be doing that, my lady.’

‘I am sick of being told what I should not do,’ Maribel told her crossly. ‘I have nothing to do but stare at the walls of my room, while you struggle to carry water, clean, wash my clothes and cook. In future I am going to help you with the chores.’

‘Captain Sylvester said that you were to be treated with the respect due you as a lady.’

‘He is not my father or my husband! He cannot command me. I shall do as I see fit. When I am in England I shall be a lady for I shall have no choice, but here on the island I must do some work or go mad.’

‘It is better to work,’ Anna said and smiled. ‘Let me carry the bucket, for you have filled it to the brim and it will be heavy. Tomorrow you can help prepare the food.’

‘We shall carry the bucket between us,’ Maribel said. ‘And then I shall change my gown for the evening. It will be cooler when the sun goes down and I think it would be better to wear one of my simpler gowns this evening.’

Maribel looked around the beach. Bonfires had been built at intervals along the shoreline and tables made of rough planks set upon trestles had been set up. Some of them were covered with plates of food: bread and fruit and messes of meat cooked in wine and sauces. She caught the aroma of roasting pig and the smell made her mouth water. Already barrels of ale and sack had been tapped, and the men were drinking heavily.

On some tables goods were displayed for sale. Weapons of many kinds, boots, clothes, all manner of trinkets, from combs for a lady’s hair to gentlemen’s silk breeches; barrels of wine and ale, goblets and cooking pots were jumbled together to be haggled over.

‘That is what is left of what we took,’ Higgins told Maribel and Anna. ‘The Cap’n sold the best stuff and we’ll be dividing the money later. The rest is there for anyone to buy, but it will not bring much.’

‘Is this the kind of thing you and Anna mean to trade?’

‘Aye, something of the sort. But there are other things that are scarce here, like flour, salt, spices and sugar—and I mean to buy a cargo after our next voyage and bring it back,’ Higgins replied. ‘But you must be hungry. May I fetch you food, lady—and you, Anna?’

‘I shall come with you.’ Anna smiled at him. ‘I know what my lady likes to eat.’

‘You are not to wait on me. I shall come with you and choose for myself.’

Anna made a disapproving face, but did not try to stop her. Maribel followed behind them, taking one of the pewter platters and moving along the table as others were doing. She helped herself to some coarse bread and a yellow cheese, hesitating over the fruit; eventually she selected a peach.

‘You should try the suckling pig,’ a voice said close behind her and she jumped, swinging round to look at the man who had spoken. That evening Captain Pike was wearing clothes that looked cleaner than those he had worn the first time they met. His beard had been trimmed, but his hair was still greasy and nothing could disguise the foul smell of his breath. Maribel’s flesh crawled; she found him repulsive. ‘Let me bring you a slice, Maribel.’

She shuddered, feeling her stomach heave. The lascivious look in his eyes robbed her of the desire to eat and she moved away, going to stand by a palm tree, her back against it as she surveyed the scene. A group of men were dancing on the beach, arms crossed as they performed some kind of a jig. Others were eating or squabbling over the goods set out for sale. She saw one draw a knife and threaten another. ‘Are you not hungry?’

Maribel turned her head as Justin addressed her. ‘In a little while, perhaps.’ She was aware that Pike was watching her still and suppressed a desire to run away.

‘Has something upset you?’

‘No, no, I am not upset.’ She took a peach and bit into it. The flesh was perfectly ripe, sweet and delicious, and the juice ran over her chin. Before she could wipe it, Justin reached out and smoothed it away with his fingers. He ran his index finger over her lower lip and then put it to his mouth and sucked it, his eyes on her face. Maribel’s appetite fled once again and she could hardly swallow even the small piece of peach in her mouth. She took a deep breath, her voice shaking, ‘You must not worry about me, Sylvester. Please attend to your business. I am perfectly well.’

Justin’s eyes flashed. ‘I did not ask if you were ill. You are distressed. Was it something Pike said to you?’

‘No, of course not,’ Maribel said a little too quickly. ‘He merely asked if I wished for some suckling pig. I said no…’

His mouth tightened. ‘You must tell me if he accosts you, Maribel. I would kill him rather than let him sully you with his touch.’

‘No…please, do not kill anyone for my sake. I am certain he will not try to touch me; I shall stay out of his way. Please, mix with your men. I am certain you must have more important things to do.’

‘Nothing is more important to me than your safety.’ Justin reached out to touch her cheek, caressing it and trailing a finger down her throat to the little pulse spot at the base. She swallowed hard, because the look in his eyes set her pulses racing again. His gaze was full of meaning, conveying a message if only she knew what he meant. Perhaps she did and that was why her heart was thudding so violently. He had told her once that he wished for a mistress, not a wife—was he letting her know she was his choice? ‘I would kill anyone who tried to harm you. I shall keep you safe until you are with your family if it costs my life.’

Maribel caught her breath, for his voice throbbed with passion. She wished that they were alone at the house. Her body was aching for his touch. She wanted to tell him that she did not want him to fight for her; she wanted him to love her. The moment was broken by the sound of shouting on the beach. Justin turned to look. A fight had broken out, drawing a crowd to watch.

‘I must sort out these fools before they kill each other,’ he said grimly. ‘I shall tell Anna to come to you.’

‘No, let her have fun,’ Maribel said, but he did not answer her.

However, as he walked away, Peg came towards her. She smiled, feeling relief as the older woman joined her.

‘This is the first feast yer have attended,’ Peg said. ‘Do not be too alarmed, Maribel. Most of this is high spirits. The men will fight, but it is not often anyone is killed; they are like children at play.’

‘Children do not have knives.’

‘Perhaps not where you lived. On the streets of London children learn to defend themselves early. I carried a knife from the age of eight. Me parents died of the plague, but I survived. I had to steal to eat until I could find work—and the work I wus offered did not please me, for I would be no man’s whore. Later, I found work as a servant, but men would not leave me be. When one of them raped me I used me knife to good effect to defend meself—and yer know the rest.’

Maribel saw the defiance in her eyes, but felt only admiration for her courage. ‘Would you teach me how to protect myself, Peg?’

Peg’s eyes narrowed. ‘Yer have Captain Sylvester to protect yer. Besides, yer will not stay here long. Why should yer need a knife?’

‘I should feel safer. You know what happened when Pike first saw me. I do not think he has forgiven me. Captain Sylvester cannot always be with me. If I had a knife, I might stand a chance against him.’

‘Yer have spirit despite yer fine ways,’ Peg said and grinned. ‘Yer may be a lady, but I see no fool. I will come tomorrow and begin yer lessons—and I will bring yer a knife.’

‘Thank you. I have some money. I can pay for my knife.’

Peg gave her a look of reproof. ‘Have I asked for payment?’

‘No. Forgive me. I did not mean to offend you.’

‘No offence taken, luvvie.’ Peg grinned at her. ‘I thought yer wus above yerself when yer first come to me, but I like yer. I wouldn’t show everyone me tricks, but I reckon I can teach yer to protect yerself from scum like that Pike. I seen him lookin’ at yer and I reckon he may try somethin’ if he gets the chance.’

‘Yes, I think he may,’ Maribel said. ‘I did not wish to say anything to Sylvester because I am enough trouble to him already, but that man frightens me. He is evil.’

‘Evil he is,’ Peg agreed, her eyes blazing, ‘but he bleeds like any man. If I show yer how to defend yourself, yer’ll be safe enough.’

‘Thank you.’ Maribel smiled. Someone had started to play a fiddle. The fighting had been stopped and men were dancing, some with their women and others together. ‘Do you wish to dance, Peg? You must not stay with me if you do.’

‘Aye, I’ll dance,’ Peg said and seized her hand. ‘And you’ll dance with me.’ She arched her brow as Maribel hung back. ‘Don’t tell me yer don’t know how ter dance?’

Maribel shook her head. Suddenly, she felt better. She was no longer the outsider, watching and feeling apart from the others. Peg was forcing her to join in the fun, and she discovered that she wanted to dance.

It was just a simple joining of hands. The dancers twirled, broke hands and then joined in a line skipping up to meet each other and then breaking off to dance with a partner once more. Maribel discovered that her partner was another woman instead of Peg, because everyone was changing partners. Next she danced with a man who grinned at her, but held her respectfully, clearly remembering that she was Captain Sylvester’s woman. After that, she found herself being twirled by Tom and then she was back with Peg again. When she broke from the line again, her hands were taken firmly and she looked up into bold eyes that made her heart race.

‘I did not know you liked to dance, Maribel.’

‘You hardly know me, Captain,’ she replied and laughed softly. ‘We sometimes danced at home in the courtyard when the wine harvest was done. I enjoyed dancing in the sunshine with the people of the estate, but when my father held a banquet, Juanita and I did not dance, for he did not approve of it—though others did. My stepmother taught me even though my father would not allow it.’

‘Then dance with me, Maribel…like this…’

He pulled her into his arms, directing her body so that she felt as if she were floating, thistledown in his arms. The music had changed, was slower now, and when he twirled her round and round he did not let go of her hand. Others swapped partners, but he kept her with him, gazing into her eyes as they moved.

Maribel hardly noticed they had moved away from the throng of dancers. When he took her hand and led her along the sandy beach her heart was racing, her breast heaving as she caught her breath. What was this feeling between them? Was it only physical passion, the need for release—or was it something more? Maribel felt that she was being drawn into a net from which she could never escape; her heart told her that this was love—but she was afraid that it was only on her side. Justin desired her and he was both generous and kind—but she wanted so much more.

‘Are you feeling better now?’ he asked, gazing down at her in such a way that she swayed towards him, wanting to be back in his arms, wanting to be kissed. ‘I could not resist when I saw you dancing. You seemed to be so happy…’

‘I was—I am happy,’ she breathed. ‘I am looking forward to seeing the other side of the island, away from—’ She broke off as his eyes narrowed. ‘Forgive me, I do not mean to criticise your men, but there is a wilder element amongst the pirates. I do not like men like Captain Pike.’

‘Well, you need not fear him while I am with you. Besides, I believe he means to leave soon. He had little luck last time out and needs to find a good prize.’

‘It would be a better place without his sort,’ Maribel said. ‘Though I have found friends. Peg is a friend. I like her.’

‘You know that she was convicted of murder and should have hanged had she not escaped?’

‘Yes—but she took revenge for what was done to her. I cannot blame her.’

‘Yet some would say that murder is wrong even if the cause be just.’ Justin’s expression was serious. ‘I shall return you to Anna. Higgins will take you back to the house. The serious business is about to begin and there may some fighting as the men drink too much.’

‘Yes, we shall leave you to your business.’

Maribel walked away from him to join Anna and Higgins. She had thought as they danced that Justin wanted to make love to her. If he had taken her in his arms and kissed her she would not have denied him, but she had spoken of wanting to see the other side of the island and the spell had been broken.

Justin was keeping his promise not to take advantage of her while she was under his protection. Maribel knew that if she wanted him to make love to her she would have to show him that she was willing to be his.

While a part of her longed for it, her pride ruled her head. To become his woman meant that she could never return to her own world. If he loved her she would give it all up willingly, but she was not sure he felt more than a fleeting desire—and that was not enough for her. She wanted, needed to be loved. There was a lonely place inside her that only love could ease.

He had told her that he could not return to England for he might be hanged as a mutineer. Maribel would be willing to sail with him—or settle in another country if he truly cared for her. She was not sure she wished to be a lady again. The life she had found here was a fulfilling one. She enjoyed helping to prepare the food and other small chores that Anna allowed her to do. Perhaps the life of a country gentlewoman would suit her, with a maid to help her. Juanita had delighted in her stillroom and Maribel had found it interesting to help with the preserves and cures they made from herbs.

To be a fine lady and sit all day at her sewing would not suit her. It was the life she would have had as the wife of Lord Roberts and perhaps in the house of her mother’s kin. Surely there must be another way to live, something more worthwhile?

Here on the island she would always have to be on her guard, but a simple country life mixing with honest folk would be so much more satisfying than the life of a grand lady.

Maribel shook her head, smiling at her foolish thoughts. Captain Sylvester might want her, but he would not be prepared to give up his way of life at sea to pander to her foolish whims. His was a precarious trade but it brought him great wealth. The money he must earn from preying on merchant ships would be far more than he could expect from the existence of a simple farmer.

Her thoughts were nonsense! She must accept what the future had in store for her. She would be restored to her mother’s family and then…her thoughts refused to think further; it seemed like a dark tunnel that she must follow with no turning or reward.

How much better it would be if she were like Anna, free to give her heart to a pirate and think nothing of it. Anna was prepared to live on the island and mix with the rough seamen that lived and visited here. Maribel did not think that she could settle for such a life, even though she longed to be with Justin.

She did not even know his true name! Maribel was restless as she lay in her bed that night. Who was he truly? What was his family like and how did they feel about his disappearance? Did they have any idea of what he had become?

It was very late when she heard him come in. His footsteps paused outside her door and her heart raced as she heard the sound of his hand upon the latch. The door was locked. She had turned the key as a precaution lest Pike should attempt to get into her room while Justin was occupied elsewhere. Now she wished that she had left it unlocked.

Would Justin have come to her? Would he have woken her, taken her in his arms to love her?

Her body cried out for him and she longed to feel his arms about her. Had she been less proud she would have left her bed and gone to him, but years of strict upbringing would not allow her to offer herself to a man.

If he loved her, surely he would speak? Maribel longed for him to give her a sign that he cared even a little for her, but her head told her that she could never expect him to love her.

It was no good, she could not sleep. The night was too warm and her mind would not let her rest. Getting out of her bed, Maribel pulled a thin wrap over her night-chemise and went through to the living room. It was still stuffy and warm in here so she unlocked the door and went down the little steps leading to the veranda.

The moon was full, making Maribel feel lonely. She walked a few steps to a position where she could see out over the cliffs to the ocean below. At night it looked dark and mysterious, the water strangely calm, unmoving. She sighed deeply for she longed for something…something she could not name.

‘What are you doing out here at night?’

Startled, Maribel turned to face Justin. He was wearing just his breeches. His feet were bare and he had not put on his shirt. She could see a trickle of sweat running over his bare chest and guessed that he too had been unable to sleep.

‘I could not rest. It is so hot and…I was thinking…’

‘I often come out at night to think. The air is cooler and things seem simpler.’

‘You must have many problems…regrets?’ Maribel looked at him. ‘You told me that you could not return home—do you miss your family?’

‘I think of them sometimes. I know my mother must miss me.’

‘Do you have brothers or sisters?’

‘I had a younger brother, but he died when he was but a child.’

‘Then your mother must miss you terribly.’

‘Perhaps.’ Justin frowned. ‘Did you have no brothers or sisters?’

‘My mother died giving birth to a stillborn child, at least that is what I have been told—but my father never spoke of her. I think they quarrelled.’ She sighed deeply and turned away to look out over the sea.

‘Were you sighing because you wished yourself at home?’

‘No.’ Maribel met his narrowed gaze. ‘I do not wish to return to my home ever. There was a time when I was happy. When my stepmother lived she made things better. I do not know if my father was always the cruel man you claim, but I remember that Juanita loved me. She was kind to me and I was happy then. I was happy when I married…’

‘You loved your husband very much?’ Justin’s voice was sharp suddenly.

‘He was my friend. He loved me. Yes, I loved him very much.’ Maribel hesitated, then, ‘You told me that you once loved someone?’

Justin was silent for a moment, then, ‘There was once a lady I would have married. She was young and beautiful. I loved her and I would have married her, but a fever took her before our wedding day.’

‘That must have hurt you terribly.’ Maribel looked into his face, witnessing the pain he could not quite hide.

‘Yes, it hurt me…’ His voice grated, as if he found it difficult to speak of his lost love. ‘It was a long time ago. I have learned to live again. A man cannot spend all his life in regret.’

‘No, that is true.’

Justin moved towards her. She stood absolutely still, waiting. For a moment his eyes held hers, then he reached out and drew her to him. He lowered his head and took her mouth, kissing her softly at first and then hungrily. Maribel melted into his body, realising that this was what she had been longing for…this was what she needed. She was so alone and she needed to be loved.

‘You are lovely. The moonlight becomes you, Maribel, but why are you out here alone?’

‘I was restless and could not sleep.’

‘Nor I,’ he murmured, his hand moving to the small of her back. ‘I was thinking of you. You haunt my dreams, waking and sleeping.’

‘Justin…’ she whispered, lifting her face for his kiss.

‘Maribel…’ Justin said hoarsely. He ran his thumb over her lower lip and she trapped it with her teeth. A shudder went through him and he pressed her closer so that she felt the hardness of his arousal and a thrill of desire shot through her. ‘I vowed I would not.’

‘I absolve you of your vow,’ she said. ‘Justin, I…’

What she might have said then was lost as they heard something and then a man came towards them through the gloom. Justin stood back from her, staring into the darkness for a moment, then he recognised the newcomer.

‘Hendry,’ he said, cursed beneath his breath and left Maribel to greet the newcomer. ‘You are back. I thank God for it. I was beginning to wonder where you had got to and to fear that things might have gone wrong—that Sabatini had reneged on the truce.’

‘All went well,’ Hendry said and took the hand he was offered. ‘The exchange was made and I have the packet for you.’

‘Thank you,’ Justin said. ‘Come and have a drink with me. The ship is yours, as I promised. You may sail with us or go your own way.’

‘I shall drink with you—unless you have unfinished business?’ Hendry glanced at Maribel, who was watching them.

‘I was merely telling Maribel that she should not wander outside alone at night,’ Justin said. ‘Go in, Madonna. I shall see you in the morning.’

Maribel inclined her head, turning reluctantly towards the house. She shivered, feeling suddenly cool despite the heat. Captain Hendry had looked at her so oddly. She wished that he had not returned. He had brought the information Justin needed to find her mother’s family but something in the way he looked at her had made her uneasy.

She had a feeling that something special might have happened with Justin had Hendry not arrived at just that moment. The barriers had come down between them and she had been on the verge of confessing that she was ready to be what everyone on the island already thought her—Sylvester’s woman.

‘Captain Sylvester asks that you forgive him,’ Anna said the next morning. ‘He has had to postpone the trip to the other side of the island, because he has business with Captain Hendry.’

‘Oh…’ Maribel’s disappointment swathed through her. She had been looking forward to the pleasure trip and for a moment the day seemed long and empty, then an idea occurred to her and she smiled. ‘I am going to clear some of the undergrowth behind the house. Captain Sylvester told me that he wants to create a fruit garden there, but has not yet found the time.’

Anna looked at her doubtfully. ‘Do you know how hard that will be, señora? Your hands have never done hard work like that and they will blister.’

‘I shall wear gloves,’ Maribel said, determined not to give up her idea. ‘Captain Sylvester has done much for me. I want to do this to thank him for his care of us, Anna.’

‘If you must…’ Anna sighed. ‘I suppose I must help you.’

Maribel smiled at her. ‘We can work together as friends, but I am not ordering you to help me, Anna. We shall clear more ground if we work together, but if you have something else to do I can manage alone.’

Anna gave her a look of grudging admiration. ‘I would never have thought you could change so much, señora. You would not have dreamed of getting your hands dirty once.’

‘I was another person then,’ Maribel told her. ‘I have been changing little by little, though at first I fought it—now I want to discover for myself what it is like to work hard.’

‘We must begin by chopping down the grass and weeds, then we can make a start on the digging…’

Maribel’s back ached and she was soaked in sweat when they decided that they had done enough for one day. A patch large enough to plant vegetables and soft fruits had been cleared at the back of the house and they had begun to dig a small part of it. The work had been even harder than Anna had warned, but Maribel was filled with a sense of pride as she looked at the results of their labour.

‘I think we have made a good start,’ she said to Anna as they walked back towards the house. ‘I am thirsty and dirty. I must wash away the sweat and change my gown before we begin to make a meal for this evening.’

‘You have done enough for one day. Let me bring water for you. You must be weary.’

‘No, I am not tired,’ Maribel said and smiled. ‘My back does ache and I think I may be stiff tomorrow, but I feel so alive. I have enjoyed working with you in the sunshine. I feel as if I have done something useful for perhaps the first time in my life.’

‘You used to have such soft hands and your needlework was so fine,’ Anna said. ‘Even Donna Juanita said how lovely your work was—do you not remember?’

‘Yes…’ Maribel sighed. ‘The girl who sewed pretty cushions was a different person, Anna. That world seems so far away. I have become someone different—a woman with a heart and mind of her own.’

Anna looked at her and nodded. ‘Why do you not tell him how you feel? I have seen a look in your eyes.’

‘I am not sure that he would care. I know that he desires me, but I cannot speak first.’

‘You must forget your pride,’ Anna told her. ‘You must decide if you want to stay here with us.’

‘I am not sure.’ Maribel’s throat caught with emotion. ‘I would stay, but only if…’

She would stay if Justin loved her, but she knew that he still loved the woman he had once wished to marry, despite what he had said about moving on. She could have him for a while, but in the end he would tire of her and then she would be alone.

Maribel enjoyed the feel of the cool water on her skin. She had been so very sweaty and her hair had collected bits of twig and dirt. Anna had helped her to wash it in the yard, and now she was stripped of her clothes in her room, the shutters closed for privacy. She washed in the water she had brought into the house herself, drying her skin and pulling on a shift to cover her body. Her hair was still wet and she sat down on the edge of the bed to rub it dry on a towel, singing a little song that Juanita had sung to her when she was small. She looked up as the door opened, expecting to see Anna, but was shocked to see Justin standing on the threshold. For a moment he stared at her without saying anything, but she saw the pulse at his throat and the way his eyes fastened on her and became aware that her body was clearly outlined through the thin shift. Her nipples had peaked with the instant response of her body to his presence, aching with the need to be touched and caressed.

‘Forgive me. I heard voices and thought Anna was with you.’

‘I was singing.’ Maribel reached for a silken wrap and drew it on over her shift. His eyes seemed to burn into her, making her breath catch in her throat. ‘Did you want something?’

‘The garden behind the house…who did all that work?’ he asked, but his breathing was ragged, his voice hoarse. He looked at her like a man dying of thirst when he sees the oasis for the first time, his need writ plain on his face. ‘Anna? Or Higgins?’

‘Anna and I did it together. You said you had not had time and I wanted to thank you for—’

‘Foolish woman!’ Justin strode towards her. ‘Show me your hands.’ Maribel held them out and heard his indrawn breath as he saw the red welts across the palms. ‘You should not have done such heavy work. Your hands will be sore in the morning.’

‘I enjoyed it,’ she replied. ‘I shall rub some salve into them. Anna always packs some into my trunks…’ She gasped as he caught her hand and carried it to his lips, licking at the redness in a way that made desire shoot through her. ‘Justin…’

‘Sometimes saliva will help,’ he said huskily, but as her eyes met his he groaned and reached out, drawing her close. ‘You were made for love, not hard physical work…’

For a moment she melted into his body, wanting his kiss to go on and on, wanting so much more that she could not name. Yet even as his hands held her closer so that she could feel the heat of his manhood pressing against her through the thin robe, she felt tears rise up to choke her. He said that she was made for love, but he did not love her—he only wanted her. As he gathered her up in his arms, her mind refused to work properly. She wanted him to kiss and touch her, to make love to her, but she knew that she might lose everything.

Justin placed her carefully amongst the sheets, bending over her to kiss her throat at the little hollow at the base. His hand moved aside her robe, exposing the open neck of her shift. He bent to kiss her, slipping his hand inside her shift to caress her breasts. His thumb caressed her nipple, making her gasp and tremble, her body arching towards his despite her fears.

‘You are very beautiful, Maribel, and I have wanted this for a long time. Deny me now if you will, for I can no longer deny myself.’ He raised his head to look down at her and then reached out to brush away the tear on her cheek. ‘Crying? Have I mistaken the case? Last night in the moonlight I thought…but I see I was wrong. You do not want this, do you?’

Maribel could not answer, nor could she control the tears. She felt them slide helplessly down her face, staring up at him wordlessly. How could she tell him that she loved him, wanted to be his woman, when she knew he did not love her?

‘Forgive me. I came to tell you we shall take our trip tomorrow and seeing you…I forgot myself.’

He turned and walked to the door. Maribel tried to speak, but could not make the words come.

‘Do not leave me. Stay and make me yours,’ she whispered, but the door had closed behind him.