Читать книгу His Small-Town Sweetheart - Amanda Berry - Страница 8

Chapter Two

Nicole straightened her shirt, tucked her hair behind her ear and shifted the six-pack from one hand to the other. She stood in front of Sam’s screen door, which he could walk by any minute and see her standing out here in the dark like a ninny. This was Sam. Her friend, her confidant.

Taking a deep breath, she knocked on the door. She could hear some shuffling from the other room, and then he was walking toward her. Holy crap, it hadn’t just been her imagination. He was tall, dark and handsome. Not at all the kid she’d left behind.

Earlier today, his blue eyes had been amazing close-up, sparkling in the sunlight with flecks of dark blue mingled with light blue and even hints of gold. Not that she’d been staring earlier. It had taken most of her willpower not to check him out the way he’d done to her. Farming had definitely been good for his development. His chest was broad. His arms were muscular, but not overly so. And she’d bet money that he was packing his own six-pack under that AC/DC T-shirt.

As he drew closer, he ran his hand through his thick, shaggy hair and she wanted to do the same, except, in her fantasy, when she wove her fingers in his hair, she would jerk his full lips down to hers. When he stopped at the door, she held up the six-pack and smiled.

She needed to stop thinking of Sam as eye candy. Their meeting today had caught her off guard. She hadn’t thought, just reacted. And it had felt good.

With everything that had happened in her life recently, she could really use a friend. Maybe Sam could use a friend, too. She’d kept his friendship close to her heart when she’d moved to California. Sam, who’d always known the right thing to do. She’d written him letters as she maneuvered through a new school and social situations she never would have experienced in Tawnee Valley. She’d never sent the letters that shared all her secrets and fears. Just a few when she’d first moved away. Right now, she needed a friend more than sex... At least, that’s what she reminded herself of when he stood on the other side of the door looking like sex on a stick.

He opened the screen door, and she slid through the opening under his arm, into the kitchen, before he could tell her not to.

“How’s it going? I brought beer.” She moved around him, catching hints of the crispness of his soap and that distinct, manly scent that was all Sam. Raw, powerful.

“You aren’t going to hug me again, are you?” He eyed her suspiciously.

She shrugged and set the beer on the table. “Probably.”

She pulled out two beers and handed him one. He took it from her, almost as if he were afraid to touch her. He hadn’t returned her hugs earlier. Of course, he hadn’t been touchy-feely when he was a fourteen-year-old, either.

Twisting off the cap to her beer, she glanced around the kitchen. It looked the same. Her dad had mentioned that Mr. and Mrs. Ward had died years ago. Other than that, her father hadn’t talked much about the Wards, except to say Sam was a hard worker.

“Cheers,” she said and clinked her bottle against his. They both took a swig and then stood there awkwardly with their beers. “So...does the rest of the house look the same? The kitchen definitely hasn’t changed.”

He shrugged. His gaze dipped down to her bare legs. She’d changed into shorts and had managed to find her one pair of sneakers that she didn’t use for running.

“This is ridiculous,” she said.

He lifted his gaze to hers and raised his eyebrow.

“We were once best friends, Sam. I used to sleep in your bed. We used to run around in bathing suits and sneakers. I showed you mine and you showed me yours...in a perfectly scientific discovery sense. We should be able to have a beer together and catch up like normal people.”

He shifted his weight on his feet, and the corner of his mouth twitched upward, about as much of a smile as he could make, apparently. “Sure. You want to see the house?”

“I’d love to.” That had been what she was angling for, after all.

Sam had a house, a job, a couple of dogs that had greeted her when she walked up, while she was adrift in life. She didn’t have a job and could end up anywhere in the United States with her search. She’d just left a long-term relationship and wasn’t in the right frame of mind to start anything. Even with her old best friend who was now hot but completely anchored to this town.

He led the way, and she noted how he filled out his carpenter jeans with a very nicely shaped butt. As he stopped abruptly, she ran into him. He looked over his shoulder at her with that disgruntled expression of his.

“Do you ever smile?” She returned his look before she stepped back and glanced around the dining room. “Nothing’s changed. How do you manage that? I’m constantly changing things. Moving furniture, painting walls, buying lamps. Jeremy used to complain that I couldn’t leave anything for longer than a minute.”

“Who’s Jeremy?” he said in that gruff voice of his. Definitely lower toned, it made her spine tingle in response. Could she get him to read her a book or even the dictionary? Maybe the ingredients off a cereal box? Whole grain oats, sugar, calcium carbonate...

“My ex-boyfriend.” She wished she could say “my dog” or maybe “my snake,” but he was her ex. “We lived together in LA. He got the apartment. I lost my job and came back here.”

“That sucks.” He led her into the living room. There was a nice flat-screen and a game console, along with a few recliners and a couch that had seen better days. He gestured to one of the chairs and sat in the one with the best view of the TV. His chair looked like the most lived-in one.

“It did suck, but it was probably for the best.” Jeremy had actually had the gall to blame her parents’ divorce as one of the reasons she wouldn’t connect with him. It was ridiculous. “I don’t want to think about it. I want to find out what you’ve been doing since I last saw you. You obviously didn’t complete our tree house.”

He shrugged. “Didn’t have time.”

Getting him to talk was like pulling teeth. They used to talk over each other. They’d had so much to say and share. “I heard about your mom and dad. I was sorry I couldn’t be here for you.”

He nodded and looked at the label on his beer. The way his shoulders hunched told her he wasn’t over the pain of losing them. She wanted to let him know that he could cry on her shoulder if he wanted. She wished she could have been there. As she’d been there for him when his dog died when they were eleven.

“You had to take care of Luke and Brady and the farm? That must have been tough. I couldn’t imagine being responsible for another person at eighteen. I was barely responsible for myself. We won’t discuss my poor goldfish burial ground. How did you date or go out?”

“I didn’t.”

She opened her mouth and snapped it shut. Someone as handsome as Sam didn’t stay single without effort. He was gorgeous and tall, and she really wanted to see the solid body she’d hugged earlier. “Didn’t you have a girlfriend in high school? I tried to date in high school, but the guys were always after one thing.”

She looked at him, expecting his answer to her question. He was still looking at his beer label, lost in his own world.

“What?” He finally raised his gaze to hers.

“High school girlfriend?”

“Yeah, I had a few of those.”

She took a drink of beer. “What about after high school? Anyone special?”

“No.”

She felt compelled to fill the empty space around them. “Jeremy and I met in college. I think that’s why we stayed together so long. I’m surprised you didn’t have anyone like that. I mean, I realize you were busy with your brothers and the farm, but it’s really hard to go for a long period without...well, you know. I mean, even in a relationship, you can have dry spells. We had been in a rut for a while. Maybe that was part of the problem. How long has it been for you?”

He lifted his eyebrows at her and she flushed with heat, realizing she’d just asked him how long it had been since he’d last had sex.

“Sorry. I tend to just say whatever’s on my mind. My mom tried to stop me, but I like being honest and open. I can’t stand when people keep secrets or don’t say what’s really on their minds. You were always honest with me. But I overstep boundaries all the time.” She took a drink to stop herself from talking.

“My family says I don’t talk enough.” He returned to his perusal of his beer bottle.

She smiled. This was easy ground to tread upon. “How are your brothers?”

“Brady’s married to Maggie Brown. They’ve got a kid, Amber. She’s cool. Luke and Penny Montgomery are together down in St. Louis.” He didn’t lift his gaze to hers. His tone was matter-of-fact, just reciting facts with no emotion connected to them.

“That’s exciting.” The names of the women sounded somewhat familiar, but that wasn’t what she was focused on. Had he really changed that much? The boy she used to know seemed to have turned into a crotchety old man at the age of thirty-one. Surely there was something exciting in his life. Maybe a hope or a dream or a wish for someone special to share his life with. She stood up and circled the room, looking at the pictures and knickknacks. They were all old with a coat of dust on them. Like his mother had placed them there and no one had moved them since. “You out here by yourself, then? No one special now?”

“No.”

She stopped in front of the TV and turned to face him. Raising an eyebrow, she asked, “No, you aren’t by yourself, or there’s no one special?”

He lifted his gaze to hers, and she caught her breath at the deep blue of his eyes. They seemed empty of that spark he’d had when they ran through the yards with pretend weapons.

“No one,” he said with all the emotion of a stone.

Even so, her heart fluttered in her chest. Nicole was hopelessly hopeful, as her mother would say. She crossed the room to stand in front of him. “So we’re in the same boat, then. Single and alone with no one to worry about but ourselves.”

“I guess so.” He took a drink.

She glanced out the window at the accumulating darkness. Did that mean he wasn’t interested in her? Or anyone? Did she want him to be interested in her? She might have had the teeny tiniest of small crushes on him in eighth grade, but nothing she ever would have acted on. They’d been best friends. Buds.

Gah. She needed to get out of her head. “I haven’t seen good stars in ages. With the city lights and air pollution in LA, I was lucky to see a few stars in the Big Dipper. Do you remember when we used to wait until dark and look at the stars?”

He nodded, and a corner of his lips quirked up a little. That was all the encouragement she needed.

“Why don’t we grab the rest of the beers and go see the stars? We can go down to the tree house and lie on our backs, look up at the stars, watch for falling stars.” She grabbed his free hand and tugged on him. “Come on, Sam. Live a little.”

His hand closed around hers. The feel of his firm grip shot through her and made her aware of his heat and how close she’d gotten to him. She was practically standing between his knees.

“Slow down, Nikki. Not everything has to be go, go, go.” This time, when the corner of his mouth went up, a small dimple flashed at her.

She stopped tugging. The warmth of his hand spread through her. Her heart thrummed a steady rhythm as she thought of all the places she wanted that hand. Her eyes focused on his lips. She forced herself to focus on renewing their friendship. Clearing her mind and her throat, she said, “We could see the stars and watch the moon play hide-and-seek in the leaves of the tree. It’ll be fun.”

For a moment, she was sure he was going to turn her down. Instead, he stood. She didn’t have time to back up. His heat surrounded her. It slipped through her clothes and wrapped itself tight around her lungs, making it hard to draw in a breath.

She ducked her head and stepped back until she could breathe again. She wanted only friendship from Sam. She was too screwed up to try anything else. Focusing on friendship should work. Just because she was attracted to him and maybe he thought she was attractive didn’t mean she wanted to ruin what could be a good friendship for some meaningless sex.

The whole reason for coming to Tawnee Valley was to uncomplicate her life and figure out her next move. Sam could be a huge complication if she let things go that way. She wanted his steady presence to help guide her in the right direction, as he had when they were kids. And, yes, they had been children at the time and were now adults with a lot more complications, but that didn’t have to stop them from being friends again. Guys and girls could be friends.

* * *

When Nicole wasn’t touching him, Sam could think straight. They grabbed a couple of flashlights and the beer and headed into the fields. Barnabus and Rebel, Barnabus’s puppy, who was almost a year old, followed them. Sam had promised himself that he was going to allow himself to live, even if he couldn’t leave his family’s farm.

Following Nicole wouldn’t hurt anything. He was curious what had happened to her after she left Tawnee Valley. In the early years after her departure, he’d started letters to her but never finished them. Time had been against him with school and chores. Then so much time had passed that it seemed strange to write to a girl who had once been his friend.

“With the rope gone, how are we going to get up?” Nicole spun to face him. She’d been quiet while they’d trekked deeper into the woods. Maybe because the woods themselves were so quiet. Their tree house loomed ahead of them in the huge oak tree.

“The same way we did as kids?” he said.

She contemplated the tree. “I’m not sure I can climb a tree these days. I think I was a lot more spindly back then. Don’t get me wrong. I exercise, but climbing trees hasn’t been a specialty. The trees out in California weren’t good for climbing.”

“I can give you a boost.” He closed the distance between them and pointed out the spot that would be easiest to climb. For the first time in a long time, his shoulders felt lighter, and his chest didn’t feel as tight. The responsibility of the farm seemed far away. “Remember this was your idea.”

“I haven’t exactly been known for my smart decisions lately.” She set the beer on the ground and positioned herself in front of the climbing route they’d zipped up as kids. “I’m counting on you not to let me land on my backside here.”

She glanced at him over her shoulder. The darkness obscured the color of her eyes, but the moonlight streaming through the tree leaves gave her a glow that made her look ethereal, unworldly. He’d never noticed before she left whether she was cute or pretty; they’d always just been buds. She used to punch him in the arm for flinching. They’d had belching competitions. There’d been nothing girlie about her then.

As she hoisted herself up, he grabbed hold of her waist to help support her. From her curves to her seductive scent, she was all woman now. A very attractive woman. When she moved beyond his reach, he let go of her waist and watched her.

Her foot slipped, and his hands automatically braced her nearest body part, which happened to be her bottom.

“Thanks.” Her voice was higher pitched than normal. She lifted herself up onto the platform and then brushed her hands over her bottom. “Hand me up the beer.”

He passed her the beer and studied the tree. One wrong move could pull at his chest muscles, which still bothered him from time to time. The small incision wound was healed, but the muscles still weren’t quite up to full power yet.

“Are you coming, cow lifter?” Her tone was teasing. “Don’t worry, I’ll give you a hand if you need it. But please don’t need it, because most likely we’ll both fall out of the tree and break something. They won’t find us for a few days. We’ll have to eat grass and the fallen leaves. It might be a great diet, but we’d soil ourselves and when they found us, there’d be all sorts of questions. Why did you think climbing a tree at ten at night would be a good—”

“Would you be quiet for a moment?”

“Why? Are you afraid I’ll be right?”

She was just a shadow in the tree, but he glared up at her anyway. He climbed carefully, feeling stupid the whole time. What thirty-one-year-old climbed trees besides Nicole? He’d been responsible for the farm and his brothers since he was eighteen. Even as he chastised himself for doing something so foolish, after staying inside the lines for so long, it felt good to do something just because he wanted to and not because it needed to be done.

When he reached the platform, he pulled himself up the rest of the way with only a slight protest from his chest muscles. When he straightened, she held out a beer to him.

“I knew you’d make it,” she said and lowered herself to the planks of wood. She patted the spot next to her.

“There was more space up here when we were kids.” When they were fourteen, they hadn’t needed much space. Now there was just enough room for them to sit side by side with their shoulders touching.

At one point they’d known each other’s secrets and fears, but now they were little more than strangers. All he knew about her life now was what she’d told him. It was more of an outline than the complete picture. How much would she expect him to share? How much was he willing to share?

“Did you find a new best friend after I left?” Nicole took a drink of her beer and stared up into the canopy of leaves. The stars twinkled beyond the leaves. The moon didn’t overpower the stars, the way streetlights did.

“No.” There was no secret in that, just a fact. “I had a group of friends in high school but never got close to any of them.” Not as he’d been close to her. Because he lived out on the farm, it made it hard to connect with his friends, and with his chores, he didn’t always have time.

“Do you still see any of them?” Her voice was soft in the darkness, not quite a whisper, as if they were sharing secrets and not just talking about what happened between then and now.

“Every once in a while, someone comes to town to visit their folks or something.” The truth was, everyone moved away after graduation. It was rare to find anyone in Tawnee Valley between the ages of twenty and thirty who wasn’t married with kids.

“I tried my hardest to fit in at my new school,” Nicole said. “Mom insisted I start dressing like a girl since I wasn’t living on a farm anymore. I made a few friends, but I couldn’t tell them any secrets without someone spreading it around school. I certainly couldn’t make blood pacts or belch in front of them.” Nicole bumped his shoulder with hers.

“You were the one who wanted to do the blood thing.” He took a swig of beer. It had been a while since he’d drunk alcohol, probably since Brady’s wedding.

“Only because I saw it in a movie.” They sat quietly for a moment. “Do you think we would have stayed friends if I hadn’t moved?”

Sam took a deep breath and followed a shooting star across the sky. “Honestly? I don’t know. It wasn’t too long after you left that I started looking at girls differently.”

“Like they grew horns and tails?”

He smiled slightly. “You know what I mean.”

“Of course, but it’s much more fun to tease you.” She leaned her head on his shoulder. “Who knows what might have happened between us if I’d stayed?”

Would he have noticed her? As more than his friend? Would it have felt as awkward as it did now, or would they have fallen into it naturally?

She took his hand in hers and held it. “I wish I knew what to do now. I wish my future was laid out before me like yours always was.”

“Don’t wish that,” he said harshly. No one wished for his life. Not even him.

“You have the farm. I’m sure you’ll find someone who will make you an excellent farm wife, and you’ll have a passel of children to help raise your livestock.” She sighed. “I have an accounting degree but barely any work experience in forensic accounting. Finding another job is going to be confined to large cities. Once I start working, I won’t have the time to date. I’ll probably die alone, but independently wealthy because I didn’t have any time to spend any of my money. Maybe I’ll leave all my money to my cat. If I had a cat...”

“At least you have options.” He couldn’t give up his birthright, and unless he wanted to date the few eighteen-year-olds in town, he didn’t have options on the dating front. There was no way he could relate to someone over a decade younger than him with her future burning bright before her, confine her to the land that had been in his family for generations. His parents had trusted him to keep the tradition going. He couldn’t let them down, so he was bound to the land and cursed to be alone.

“Ugh, when did this become so serious?” She snuggled closer to him and pointed up through the branches. “What constellation is that?”

“What makes you think I know?” He tensed with her touch, but it felt nice to have someone trust him and not want to rehash the bad stuff. Someone he hadn’t let down. He relaxed and drank some beer, breathing in the cool night air.

“Please.” She snorted derisively. “You know everything.”

He didn’t know anything. All he could do was follow the path his parents laid out for him. Whether he wanted to or not. But right now, he could forget about his responsibilities for an hour and point out the stars to someone who could be his friend before she left him again.