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TABLE OF CONTENTS

PREFACE by Paul Herron

INTRODUCTION by Kim Krizan

AGAIN TOWARDS AMERICA -Will I ever reach joy?

JOHN - I believe I have defended myself against suffering

NANANKEPICHU II - We saved the dream

THE COLLECTOR - I suggested we feed him the diary

INTERMEZZO - Please lead me into the world of pleasure

I REMEMBERED THIS - My first erotic feeling

THE PRESS - I don’t want to think—I want to do some typesetting

NO PUEDO MAS - I do not want you back

A DREAM OF HAITI - My desire surges towards him

WOMAN OF ACTION - I feel ready for this

UNDER A GLASS BELL - My own soul has reached into other souls

L’HOMME FATAL - My difficulty with the feminine man

THE TRANSPARENT CHILD - He is my son, my lover

THE PROBLEM OF THE DIARY - My own voice is here

THIS GREAT HUNGER - Now you must find reality

GORE - If I could have loved a woman, it would be you

AWAKENING - Oh, the drug of my marvelous dreams

ENDINGS - The hell grew larger as the illusions broke

RENUNCIATION - There was a stranger in my bed

LIFE! - Touch, oh, touch this man of fire

INDEX