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Chapter Two

Planning the perfect death wasn’t easy, but she wanted one. It was the only way. Abby read the doctor’s diagnosis and recommendations every morning. It was in her bedside table drawer, tucked away from the world but in exactly the same place for her daily routine.

She awoke, showered, dressed for her day and read the report as her tea brewed. She might be groggy from a poor night’s sleep, but she still put in her contacts and read the torn sheet of notepaper from the journal.

It took her the same number of minutes to read the other papers she’d collected. Three diagnoses over three years from three different cities. Her tea would be ready for a dash of lemon to help her concentrate.

Holistic remedies suited her much better than the prescriptions she’d used since her twenties. Stopping the input of chemicals into her body was the best thing she’d ever done.

It was so freeing.

Her mind could think on multiple levels like it hadn’t for the past several years. She sipped the last bit of her tea with her blueberry tea biscuit. More brain energy and antioxidants. She’d need to be on her toes this morning for the next phase of her experiment.

Killing Dr. Roberts had been eye-opening. An epiphany of sorts. Abby no longer was held back by perfectionism. Her death demonstrated it was no longer necessary. The good doctor’s analysis had allowed her to move forward last year. Finding the perfect form of death would take practice, yes. But the doctor’s death had provided enlightenment—of a sort.

If she couldn’t perfect the act of death herself, she’d enlist others to help in her research. Simple enough.

She covered her lips and giggled, ready for her day of research to begin. She couldn’t say that she loved this day each week. As Dr. Roberts pointed out, the unfortunate attachment disorder kept her from loving anything. But this day gave her a bit of excitement to look forward to. Moving toward the completion of a project should give a normal person a sense of accomplishment.

And she was so close.

The alarm went off on her phone. She gathered her things from the hall table. Purse, lunch and then the clean surgical gloves and mask from their dispensers. She walked to the door and stood there waiting for it to open, then reminded herself that she had the right to open it when she wanted.

Four years away from the prison they called a hospital and she still had moments where she forgot she was free to move as she wished. It was less than a minute of her life every now and again, but she resented every wasted second it took to force herself to reach out and turn the doorknob.

Thinking about her habits, she crossed the parking lot and climbed the steps to wait under the awning. Dwelling on the idea that her quirks were odd was a waste of time. That’s what had sent her to Dr. Roberts to begin with.

A mistake. But a corrected mistake. Using Victor Watts had been an uncontrollable moment of fury. Talking to him before his test had always been nice. Pity because he seemed perfect for the ultimate experiment.

Taking a job at the Veterans Affairs Hospital eighteen months ago had been a moment of brilliance. Her father’s attorney had used very little energy to convince the owner of a pathetic little box of a house on Denley Drive to sell. She would have preferred to continue living in the five-star hotel. Her parents could afford it. Instead, her parents insisted things would be better if she didn’t.

At least the new house had a specific and organized place designed to meet her more than rational needs. And if she wasn’t allowed to drive, walking across the parking lot to the Dallas Area Rapid Transit station was at least convenient. The last time she’d met with her father’s attorney, he joked how fitting it was that the two stores nearby were a pharmacy and second-hand shop. He’d laughed at her.

The light rail arrived to take her down Lancaster Road. The job was mundane, her social life nonexistent, but it was all worth it for her research.

The Veterans Affairs Hospital gave her the subjects she needed. Broken, easily manipulated men who had the strength and the wherewithal to perform the necessary duties. Ha. Duties. They had the strength to fulfill the experiment Dr. Roberts wrote would never come to fruition.

The doctors were wrong. Everyone was wrong.

Perfection in death was possible.

So close. So so close.

Moving from this venue would be difficult. But working with this group of men and women was coming to an end.

Changing a variable in last week’s test would be interesting today. The small amount of excitement she could feel recharged her with purpose.

“Hi, Abby,” Dalia said from reception. “Looks like we have a full day of appointments. You’re going to be busy.”

“Wonderful.” She’d practiced the good-morning smile and mimicked the intonation most used when they were excited for their day. The smile that continued on Dalia’s face indicated that Abby had managed to keep her voice free of sarcasm.

She picked up the charts as she did every morning and took them to their small, efficient office. There were tapes ready to be transcribed and yes, a full day of veterans checking in for their sleep studies. The private at eight o’clock would be perfect. According to the notes in Simon Evans’s chart, he didn’t have a history of violence, but she could change that.

She could definitely change that.

Simon arrived right on time. Abby prepped him for his EEG and then the technician applied the nodes to begin the procedure. No one could connect her to the actual study, which was in a sleep lab, on a different floor, on different days. No one at the shorthanded Veterans Hospital ever questioned her competent help.

The electroencephalogram monitored brain waves while a patient slept. It set up a baseline and then monitored the volunteers throughout the sleep studies. Perfect for her needs since each participant needed a session per month.

Two of her experiments had succeeded recently.

It wouldn’t be long. Not long at all.

Simon was snoring. She checked the monitor. He seemed to be in full REM. She locked the outside door so they wouldn’t be disturbed, cautiously placed earphones over Simon’s head and turned on her carefully recorded message.

For the next hour, her softly spoken words about injustice, violence and murder repeated. Keywords that helped the subject draw the logical conclusion that death was the only possible solution for their problems.

The tape ended. Three hours of sleep was all the patient was allowed. The timer dinged, she awoke Simon and alerted the technician it was time to finish. Once he cleaned up, she brought the questionnaire to be completed along with the second page for her own study.

Simon passed the next appointment on the way out—Private Second Class Rashad Parker with debilitating night terrors. He’d already tried to choke his girlfriend in his sleep. Abby went through all the steps, waited until he entered rapid eye movement and introduced her tape.

Curiosity was the closest she got to elation. She thought Rashad would have succumbed to her mind-manipulation last week. With her new keywords, culmination was probable within the next couple of days.

Wouldn’t Dr. Roberts be surprised if she was still around?

She covered her lips and giggled.

Ranger Defender

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