Читать книгу Green Lightning - Anne Mather - Страница 8

PREPARING for dinner that evening, Helen found herself going over those stormy minutes with Heath again and again, trying to discover how it was everything had gone so wrong. If only he had not come upon her and Miles like that; if only she had not stumbled into explanations he had not asked for; if only she had acted a little more maturely, she might not be feeling so miserable now.

Sighing, she sank down on to the padded stool in front of her dressing table and surveyed her reflection with brooding disgust. Tears always left her looking all blotched and puffy around her eyes, and she had cried for an hour after Heath had let her go. Even her nose looked as if she was going down with a cold, and she doubted if even a heavy make-up could disguise what she had been doing.

Resting her elbows on the polished wood, she sniffed dejectedly. Why was it that she always came out of their arguments feeling like a victim, while Heath could dismiss her one minute and talk casually to Mrs Gittens the next? It wasn’t fair! She wasn’t a child any longer. But Heath persisted in treating her like one, and she always seemed to end up proving he was right.

It wasn’t as if she had got angry with him for treating Miles like he had. On the contrary, if she was honest she would admit that she had been more than a little relieved when Heath had appeared, even if his entrance had precipitated another fight. Miles’ behaviour had warned her of the dangers inherent in their relationship, particularly as she was not interested in him that way, and she thought she ought to be grateful to Heath for that.

Nevertheless, her uncle had not been prepared to forgive and forget. The minute they were out of earshot, he had turned his contemptuous gaze upon her, and his belittling appraisal had done nothing to restore Helen’s self-confidence.

‘How long?’ he demanded, his green eyes raking her face with grim intent. ‘How long has that oaf been allowed to touch you?’

‘He didn’t—he hasn’t—I mean, it wasn’t what you thought, Heath,’ Helen started unhappily. ‘It was just—well, when I brought the Land Rover back, he—he sympathised with me.’ She tucked her chin against her chest. ‘I—I suppose I asked for it.’

Heath halted abruptly by the gate leading into the orchard. ‘What do you mean? Had you had an accident in the Land Rover? I’ve warned you about driving too fast before—–’

‘I wasn’t driving too fast,’ protested Helen helplessly. ‘And I didn’t have a crash.’

‘Why would he need to sympathise with you, then?’ Heath grated, his lean face taut with impatience. ‘What’s happened, Helen? What have you done? You might as well tell me, before Mrs Gittens does.’

Helen lifted her face unwillingly. Comprehension was dawning, and she didn’t like what she was thinking. ‘You mean—you mean—you haven’t seen Mrs Gittens?’

‘No. I drove straight to the garage. Why?’

‘Oh, God!’ Helen’s shoulders sagged. ‘But—I thought you knew. I thought that was why you were so mad—–’

‘I knew? I knew what?’ snapped Heath irritably, grasping her by the shoulders. ‘For heaven’s sake, Helen, get to the point. What is it I’m supposed to know?’

Helen shook her head. ‘Don’t you remember?’

‘Remember what?’

‘Where—where you asked me to go this afternoon?’

‘Where I asked you to go?’ declared Heath blankly. ‘No, damn you, I don’t—yes! Hell, yes, of course I do!’ He stared down into her troubled face with growing comprehension. ‘The Land Rover!’ he snarled. ‘You went to meet Angela Patterson in the Land Rover!’ His fingers dug painfully into the soft flesh of her upper arms. ‘Lord, I’d forgotten all about her!’

That was reassuring, at least, thought Helen tremulously, but her reassurance was shortlived. Her words had driven every trace of warmth out of Heath’s face, and the hard green eyes were like lasers boring into her.

‘You little bitch!’ he swore violently. ‘You self-willed little hellion! You deserve a damn good hiding, and one of these days I’m going to give it to you!’

His ill-chosen words brought her back from the brink of self-pity, and dragging together what little confidence she had left, she faced him bravely. ‘It’ll take a better man than you, Rupert Heathcliffe!’ she declared courageously, and tearing herself out of his grasp, she ran the rest of the distance to the kitchen door. There was a back staircase that led from the kitchen to the upper floors of the house, and ignoring Cook’s startled face, Helen took it. She doubted Heath would follow her, and she was right; but she didn’t stop until the door of her room was closed securely behind her.

Now she got up from the stool and surveyed her domain with troubled eyes. It was more than three hours since she had had that confrontation with Heath, and she was dreading the prospect of joining him and Angela Patterson for dinner. Mrs Gittens had brought her this news, tapping tentatively at Helen’s door and clucking her tongue reprovingly when she saw Helen’s tearful face.

‘You should have known better,’ she declared, tidying up the clothes Helen had left strewn across the soft pink carpet, and shaking her head at the silk wrapper which was all the girl was wearing. ‘You’d better get some clothes on. Your uncle’s sent me to tell you he expects you to join him for dinner this evening. He wants you to meet the young lady who arrived this afternoon.’

‘I have met her,’ muttered Helen sulkily, sitting crosslegged on her bed, but Mrs Gittens only gave her an old-fashioned look.

‘From what I hear, you refused to speak courteously to the young woman,’ she responded drily. ‘And if you don’t want Heath coming up here and dragging you down by the hair, I’d suggest you made a little effort to be civil.’

Helen sighed now, running the tips of her fingers across the quilted damask covering the wide bed. She supposed she would have to change into something suitable for the evening, but how she wished she dared ignore the summons. The idea of eating dinner in Angela Patterson’s company was not appealing, and whatever Heath said, she would never forgive him for speaking to her the way he had.

Her room at Matlock Edge overlooked the side and back of the house. Away to her right, the wooded slopes of Jacob’s Hollow cast long shadows as the evening sank into dusk, and bats had started their wild erratic swooping between the trees. Below her, at the back of the house, were the tennis lawns and swimming pool, the trellises that hid the changing cabins from view bright with creamy yellow roses.

The room itself was spacious, and the furnishings matched their surroundings—long fitted wardrobes, a square dressing table, with leaved mirrors, and a huge bed, big enough to accommodate half a dozen people.

Helen remembered how lost and frightened she had felt when Heath first deposited her in that bed. But he had always been able to soothe her baby fears away. She knew he had stayed with her many nights, nights when she had awakened screaming from a terrifying nightmare to find he was there to comfort and reassure her. Later, when he had returned to his own room, she had missed his calming influence, but she had always known he was just along the corridor, and she could always go to him if she was frightened.

His mother had objected, of course. Mrs Heathcliffe had still been living at Matlock Edge in those days. Her husband, Heath’s father, had died suddenly when Heath was only nineteen, and he had left university to come and handle his father’s affairs. Heath had been twenty-one when Helen came to live with him and his mother, and Mrs Heathcliffe had lost no opportunity to deride his reckless decision.

‘It’s not as if the child’s a blood relative!’ she had argued. ‘People will talk, Rupert!’

His mother was one of the few people who still called him Rupert, but her pleas had been to no avail. Heath had been adamant. Helen’s father had had no living relatives, and Heath and his mother were the only people able to claim a relationship with the child, the only people between Helen and a life in Council care.

Scrubbing fiercely at the unwanted dampness of her cheeks, Helen slid back the doors of the fitted wardrobes and surveyed the rack of clothes. Thank goodness Mrs Heathcliffe didn’t live with them any more, she thought fervently. Heath’s mother had never approved of her son’s decision, and had lost no opportunity to try and make the girl regret that she had been brought to Matlock Edge.

As the years went by, Helen learned to ignore the petty slights, the studied insults, the painful jabs in the ribs Mrs Heathcliffe used to administer if she was sure her son was out of the room, and eventually, when she was ten, Heath’s mother had taken herself off to live in Manchester. She had an apartment there, and Heath visited her dutifully every month, but Helen’s continued existence had caused a rift between them that was difficult to breach. Even so, Mrs Heathcliffe was not unhappy in Manchester. She played golf and bridge, and she took regular trips abroad for her health, or so she said, but privately Helen thought it suited her to let Heath feel she had been hurt by his loyalty to the child, as she had always dubbed her. He was so much more generous that way.

The clothes confronting her did not inspire any enthusiasm. Helen much preferred jeans, or slacks of any kind, to the more feminine items in her wardrobe, and in consequence, the clothes she possessed were mostly out of date. She so seldom ate dinner with Heath these days, she had taken to having her evening meal brought up to her room, preferring to curl up in front of the portable television to facing a lonely hour in the morning room. On those occasions when she did join Heath for dinner, she had generally worn a blouse and skirt, but somehow she knew Angela Patterson would not appear at dinner dressed so prosaically.

On impulse, she pulled out one of the party dresses she had worn less than two years ago. A flouncy thing, made of some synthetic fibre, it had not suited her even then, but after wearing school uniform all day, it had seemed a pleasant relief. Now, however, she saw it for what it was: a puerile attempt to make a gauche adolescent into a soignée adult, and she grimaced at her own taste in choosing it.

Sighing, she allowed her hand to brush lightly along the row of garments. What else did she have? she asked herself unhappily. If she had asked Heath for new clothes, no doubt he would have bought them for her, but she had been too busy showing off on her motorcycle to realise that proving herself as a woman was more important than aping Heath’s abilities. It was too late now. She had to wear something from this collection, and if she didn’t hurry up, Heath would have something else to get angry about.

A quick shower freshened her body, and rummaging in her drawer for clean panties, she returned to her appraisal of the wardrobe. If she wore any of these she would be a laughing-stock, she thought, pulling off a flimsy flowered nylon, which had crushed her breasts in such a way it was practically indecent. She would have to wear a blouse and skirt, as before, and hope that Angela Patterson did not appear in something too dissimilar.

She was fumbling with the buttons of her blouse when the door opened behind her, and expecting Mrs Gittens, she turned with an appealing grimace. ‘I know, I know,’ she was beginning, ‘but I can’t seem to get these buttons fastened—–’ and then she broke off abruptly as Heath let himself into the room.

He had changed for dinner, into a lightweight dark brown suit that complemented the darkness of his skin and the silvery lightness of his hair. It clung to his lean frame with loving elegance, accentuating the supple lines of his body and the powerful length of his legs.

‘Oh!’

Helen turned sharply when she saw who it was, bending her head deliberately to concentrate on her task. But not before she had noticed, with some relief, that he was no longer glaring angrily at her.

‘Here, let me,’ he offered briefly, coming behind her, so that for a moment their reflections mingled in the lamplit illumination of the dressing table mirrors.

‘No. I mean—you can’t,’ muttered Helen, more thumbs than fingers now with him watching her, and growing impatient, he laid his hands on her shoulders and turned her round to face him.

‘Why can’t I?’ he demanded, brushing her clumsy hands aside and deftly inserting buttons into holes. But she noticed that when his fingers accidentally touched her breast he withdrew his hand immediately, turning his eyes away from the sudden tautness of its crest.

He left her then, walking across the room half impatiently, as if unwilling to say what must be said. But finally he turned and faced her, and a little of the anger he had exhibited earlier was back there in the agate hardness of his eyes.

‘Look,’ he said at last, ‘I guess we were both a little reckless this afternoon. I spoke—hastily, I admit it. I’m not saying it wasn’t warranted. It was. But—well,’ he thrust one hand to the back of his neck, ‘I didn’t mean to hurt you the way I did.’

Helen’s lips trembled, and she turned her back on him again to unfasten the strip of leather holding the end of her braid in place. ‘Who says you hurt me?’ she asked, her voice annoyingly unsteady, and Heath uttered a muffled oath before striding back to where she was standing.

‘Mrs Gittens told me you’d been crying,’ he essayed quietly.

‘Oh—Mrs Gittens!’ Helen tugged fiercely at the hair she was releasing from the braid.

‘Yes, Mrs Gittens,’ agreed Heath, once more putting her hands aside and taking over. He allowed the thick silky hair to slide sensuously through his fingers. ‘I suppose I was speaking out of turn. You’ll be eighteen next year. Old enough to get married, if you want to. Certainly too old for me to object if you choose to allow young Ormerod to kiss you.’

‘Oh, don’t be silly!’ Helen tore her hair out of his grasp and reached for her brush. For a moment, she had thought he was regretting his anger over her treatment of Miss Patterson. Instead, he was actually condoning the way Miles had treated her! ‘I’m not interested in “young Ormerod”, as you call him!’ she snapped. ‘Don’t patronise me, Heath. You’re not my father!’

‘Maybe not. But I am old enough to be so,’ he retorted, his own tone responding to the sharpness of hers. ‘Anyway, as it seems obvious you don’t desire my forgiveness, I’ll go, and allow you to complete your toilette.’

The trace of mockery in his words was not lost on Helen, and she longed to say something to wipe that look of smugness from his face. But it would not do to antagonise him yet again, particularly with the prospect of the evening looming ahead of her like a visit to the dentist.

So instead, she said: ‘Thank you,’ and allowed him to walk to the door before adding in an undertone: ‘I’m glad you’re not still cross with me, Heath.’

‘I don’t remember saying I wasn’t,’ he retorted, his mouth twisting in acknowledgement of her counteraction. ‘I just want you to know I’m not indifferent to the fact that you’re growing up.’

Helen turned, her hair curling irrepressibly about her shoulders, her face suddenly alight with sudden hope. ‘Do you think so?’ she exclaimed. ‘Do you really think so?’

‘Yes,’ he agreed flatly. ‘You make me feel quite old,’ and before she could respond, he had let himself out of the room.

Dinner was just as awful as Helen had anticipated.

They ate in the family dining room, which was one of the smaller rooms at Matlock Edge, with a circular dining table that dated from the eighteenth century. In daylight, the dining room looked out over the patio at the back of the house, but tonight the lamps were lit, and only the urns of flowers that flanked the french windows were illuminated from inside.

The dining room was panelled in oak, with delicately-carved clusters of rosebuds decorating the wood. The ceiling was high and moulded, and although there was a crystal and bronze chandelier suspended over the dining table, they mostly ate by lamp or candlelight, on those occasions when Heath had company.

As Helen had expected, Angela Patterson was present at the dinner table, sleek and self-satisfied in an ice-blue chiffon creation that left a good deal of her shoulders bare. She was not tanned, as Helen was tanned, from days spent almost exclusively outdoors. Her skin was white, whiter than any skin Helen had ever seen before, and smooth as alabaster, and just as soft.

In her white blouse and dark blue pleated skirt, Helen felt as if she was wearing school uniform again, and she guessed Miss Patterson was enjoying the evident contrast between them. It made her wish she had worn the floral nylon after all. At least then Heath would have been forced to notice her. With her burgeoning young body bursting from every seam, he could hardly have failed to do so.

It soon became obvious that Angela Patterson had made good use of the time Helen had spent sulking in her room. She and Heath were already on the best of terms, and Helen wouldn’t have been at all surprised if Miss Patterson had called him Rupert. But she didn’t. She addressed him as Mr Heathcliffe, though she spoke his name with a certain air of intimacy, and the conversation between them was relaxed and easy, as if they had known one another for years, instead of just hours.

‘How fortunate for me that I went to Matt Hodge’s party,’ Heath remarked, while Helen was making an effort to swallow the mouthful of lamb she had been chewing for the past three minutes. ‘He and I are not exactly friends, more business associates, and it was only because I wanted to speak to him about a certain export order that I went along.’

‘It was fortunate for me, too,’ responded Angela Patterson eagerly. ‘I mean, I didn’t know what I was going to do. The rent on my apartment was due, and as you know, my qualifications don’t exactly equip me for any ordinary job.’

‘What are your qualifications, Miss Patterson?’ Helen interspersed politely, ignoring Heath’s sudden intake of breath, and the older girl uttered a tolerant laugh.

‘Oh, I’m afraid, like you, I was brought up expecting not to have to work. Mr father was a successful author, of technical books, you understand—–’ this for Heath’s benefit, Helen was sure—‘but when he died, the death duties were crippling. I’m afraid I was left almost destitute, my only accomplishments to dress well and look pretty!’

She turned helpless eyes on Heath as she said this, and Helen wanted to curl up with embarrassment. Dear heaven, she thought, did Angela really think she could get away with that? Surely no one could expect to make such a statement without being laughed out of sight. But apparently Heath had accepted it, for, as Helen was gazing at her incredulously, he went on:

‘The ideal accomplishments so far as I’m concerned. I suppose I am to blame for allowing Helen to persuade me that she was happy here at Matlock, doing nothing but race that noisy machine of hers. It’s time she began to look like my niece, not to mention act like it. I’m beginning to believe my mother was not so far wrong when she said I was letting her grow up like a gipsy.’

Helen gasped, but before she could speak, Angela added: ‘Yes. Well, I only hope she’s prepared to listen to me. One can only teach when there is a willingness to learn.’

‘Oh, I’m sure she will,’ remarked Heath infuriatingly, raising his wine glass to his lips, and Helen’s jaw clenched at this deliberate attempt to provoke her. They were speaking as if she wasn’t there, and she had what she recognised as a childish desire to storm out of the room. But she didn’t. She remained where she was, lifting her wine glass to Heath in a mocking kind of salute, so that his mockery faded to a brooding preoccupation.

‘You have such a beautiful home,’ Angela interjected, and Helen guessed she had noticed Heath’s sudden lapse of interest in herself. ‘Has it been in your family for a number of years? I noticed the exquisite carving on the stairs. Is it Grinling Gibbons?’

‘A contemporary of his, I believe.’ Heath recovered his manners, and forced a faint smile. ‘Actually, the house was bought by my grandfather in the early part of this century. Before that, it was owned by the Countess of Starforth.’

‘How interesting!’ Angela finished eating and leant towards him confidingly. ‘Daddy and I used to own a house in Cornwall—Trenholme. He bought it when my mother died. He found he could work there more easily than in London. He had so many friends, you know, and one or other of them was always calling in to see him when he was in town. That was why we moved away, really. He needed solitude for his writing.’

‘I’m surprised one of your father’s friends couldn’t offer you a job,’ put in Helen staunchly, determined not to be ignored completely. ‘I mean, that’s what friends are for, isn’t it? To help you when you’re desperate.’

Angela’s lips thinned. ‘I wasn’t—desperate exactly, Helen. As—as a matter of fact, there were several positions offered to me. But it was finding the right job that mattered.’ She exchanged a knowing smile with Heath. ‘You understand, don’t you, Mr Heathcliffe? A girl of my upbringing—well, it was important for me to find an occupation I could feel comfortable in.’

Heath nodded. ‘I appreciate that.’

‘What you’re saying is, you wouldn’t have scrubbed floors, or manned the check-out at a supermarket,’ Helen persisted annoyingly, and she saw Angela’s nails digging into her palms as she endeavoured to answer her civilly.

‘There was no question of that,’ she declared, casting another tolerant look in Heath’s direction, but having got her enemy retreating, Helen was in no mood to let her go.

‘I don’t see what else you could have done,’ she observed reasonably, folding her hands demurely in her lip. ‘I mean, you did say you had no qualifications—–’

‘That will do, Helen.’ Heath’s abrupt remonstration brought her brief bid for superiority to an end. ‘I’m sure you know perfectly well what Miss Patterson is talking about—–’

‘Oh—Angela, please!’

‘Very well, then, Angela. I’m sure you understand what Angela is trying to say, Helen. And while we’re on the subject, let me say I expect you to treat our guest with rather more courtesy than you’ve shown this far. I’ve apologised for your arriving to meet her in the Land Rover, and Angela’s prepared to forgive and forget. So am I, providing we don’t have any further demonstrations of that kind—do I make myself clear?’

‘Perfectly,’ exclaimed Helen tautly, her face burning with hot colour. ‘And now, as you evidently don’t need my presence to discuss my shortcomings, perhaps you’ll allow me to go to bed. I’m feeling rather tired.’

Heath’s mouth tightened. ‘Helen—–’ he said warningly, but she had thrust back her chair and was facing him with grim defiance. ‘Oh, all right,’ he muttered, lifting his expensively-groomed shoulders. ‘Go to bed. I’ll talk to you again in the morning.’

It was an effort to bid goodnight to Angela Patterson, but Helen managed it, leaving the room with her head held high, as much to hold back the tears as to demonstrate her independence. It had been a disaster. The day had been a disaster. And she was very much afraid that tomorrow and all the days after were not going to be that much better.