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Two

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At six o’clock Saturday morning, April 15, Michelle opened one eye and drew a bead on the waiting thermometer on the nightstand, hoping to instill a conscience into the unrelenting object. Both Thursday and Friday it had been a cold, heartless fiend. If it didn’t cooperate today, she’d be faced with the choice of canceling her cruise or missing a fertile month. Somehow she doubted a letter from Dr. Adam would qualify as a medical emergency. She could kiss the cost of her airfare and the cruise goodbye. She reached for the thermometer, hoping it would save the day.

It did. Sort of. It read higher, but not as high as she’d expected. She stared at it a moment, wondering if it was high enough, then kissed its hard, pointy little head and logged the number on the chart. She should have purchased one of those ovulation indicator kits months ago, but it was too late now. Trying to remain calm and confident, she called the clinic and said she was on the way. Once she was there, they would test her and tell her everything was okay. Today was the big day.

* * *

At eight-forty-five Michelle eyed the clock on the dashboard. Her flight for Miami didn’t leave until ten-fifty. Plenty of time. She eased up on the accelerator as she headed west on 1-94 for Metro Airport.

She’d missed last night’s stay at the Marriott in Miami that came with the trip, which meant she’d have to catch a cab directly to the ship. Then she’d have a couple of hours to rest in her cabin before departure. Michelle forced down the anxiety she felt pushing at her rib cage, willing herself to remain calm.

It had barely been an hour since the procedure and the doctor’s words still hung over her like a dark cloud. You’re not ovulating yet…Probably tomorrow…It would be better to wait… But in the end he’d agreed that sperm could live a couple of days with a high count such as her donor’s, and that as long as she ovulated soon, she still had a fairly good chance.

She turned the car radio to an easy-listening station and breathed deeply. Tomorrow at this time she’d be on the Norway, halfway to St. Martin and other ports of call. A weeklong cruise full of sunshine, fresh air and, best of all, no phones. All those odd-hour emergencies would somehow be handled by her clients. If all else failed, maybe they’d open their software manuals and figure things out for themselves. She frowned. If too many customers did that, would they need her when she got home? Finally she laughed and relaxed her grip on the steering wheel. Sometimes she worried about the silliest things.

She’d been free-lancing now for three years and had more referrals than she could handle. In fact, one of the changes she’d have to make before any baby arrived was to cut down on the sixty-hour workweeks. She exited the freeway at Merriman Road and headed for the terminal. The income was nice. It enabled her to take this cruise and pay for all the tests and trips to the clinic. But she didn’t have to put in so much time anymore. Years of hard work and no frills, plus her parents’ life insurance proceeds, had netted her a healthy nest egg.

“Humph!” She pulled up to the curb and flagged a skycap. Nest egg. Even her analogies were hormonal lately. Tick, tick, tick. It was so annoying. Thirty-six wasn’t the end.

The skycap tagged her luggage and stapled receipts to her ticket. A couple of laps around the long-term parking lot and she found a spot. She grabbed her purse off the passenger seat and locked the car, annoyed with herself for growing harried. If she let the possibility of motherhood monopolize her thoughts for the next month, she’d go crazy. And if she wanted those little swimmers to live until tomorrow and have a chance at reaching their destination, she’d better forget about them and relax. With a new resolve, she exhaled loudly and strolled toward the terminal.

Shortly after two o’clock, Michelle followed the porter and her bags up the gangplank, a humid head wind slowing their pace. At seventy-six degrees, it was already twenty degrees warmer than home and the ship hadn’t even left dock.

Michelle smiled. This had been the right decision. She had a good feeling about this trip. With any luck, a new life was already beginning inside her. And with the throngs of passengers leaning over railings and still boarding, certainly there had to be at least one handsome fantasy man among them.

They made their way up to the Viking Deck and aft to her stateroom, where the porter deposited her bags and promptly departed. A pair of portholes drew her to the far wall. She peered out and saw another ship making its way out of the harbor, waving arms visible from her many decks. On a satisfied sigh, Michelle turned and scanned the space around her. The room was small, but tastefully decorated. Actually, all she needed was clean and private. She didn’t plan on spending much time in here, anyway. She placed her hands on her hips and wondered what to do next. What she usually did first when she traveled was unpack. What she probably should do was lie down and rest.

Neither seemed appealing.

Her stomach growled and she looked at her watch. She’d chosen late meal settings, which meant dinner wasn’t until eight-thirty, more than six hours away. Sandwiches were supposed to be available near the pool, wherever that was.

She found a diagram of the ship and studied it a moment, getting her bearings. The pool was one level up, on the forward end of the Pool Deck. That seemed logical.

A moment later she pocketed her key and headed down the narrow hallway. It was all she could do to keep from laughing. The idea of cruising each deck in search of her fantasy man had already brought her hours of entertainment.

Now the game could actually begin.

She’d decided on blue eyes, dark hair, six-two or so, a rugged, tanned complexion and the body of an athlete. It might take her all week to find such a specimen, but hey, the looking would be half the fun.

Animated passengers swarmed around Le Bistro, plastic tumblers in one hand and paper plates in the other. Michelle pressed her way through the crowd, helped herself to a couple of tuna points, celery sticks and iced tea, then looked around for an empty seat. Finding none, she strolled back along the railing to the stairway and walked up a level. A quiet place where the sounds of the seas replaced the drum of the city was just what the doctor ordered. It was either that or go to her room and stand on her head in the corner. She’d heard some women actually did that to increase their chances…

Damn. She had to get her mind off this morning.

She turned to starboard and found a comfortable chaise longue. There she settled, placing her plate and tea on the table beside her.

With a celery stick between her lips, she took in the endless blue-green horizon, suddenly feeling very small, and that life’s little foibles were insignificant. She finished her snack, her eyes never leaving the gently rolling waters. It was so hypnotic she felt her lids grow heavier and heavier, until finally she leaned back and closed her eyes.

A cool breeze stirred the salty air. Waves slapped steadily against the hull far below, each one by measure stripping away layers of tension, leaving her limbs languid, her mind afloat. Her last waking thought was that she might never leave this spot.

* * *

HOOOHHHNNN…HOOOHHHNNN…

The nasal blast reverberated through the ship and Michelle sat up with a start. Looking left and right, she didn’t see a soul. Disoriented, she blinked rapidly, then remembered where she was.

She pulled herself awake and followed the hoopla coming from the other side, half expecting the ship to list—like in that coffee commercial she’d seen. She smiled at her own private joke as she rounded the comer. The elbow-to-elbow crowd was covered with confetti and streamers tossed from above. At first glance, the scene seemed too contrived for her tastes. It reminded her of plastic leis at backyard luaus. But apparently her attitude wasn’t shared.

She scanned the noisy crowd until she spotted the only other uninvolved figure. He was leaning on his forearms, looking like a poised cat amid a field of scurrying mice. In contrast to the riotous tourist garb that surrounded him, he wore a light blue button-down shirt and darker blue Dockers pants. His thick chestnut hair was cropped short, a breeze lifting a few strands from his pale forehead. While he was lean, he didn’t have the look of an athlete, and he certainly wasn’t someone who spent much time outdoors.

Below, the mighty engines toiled and vibrated as the ship pulled slowly from the dock.

Still, the man didn’t move.

And neither did Michelle.

She noticed the older couple to his right were still waving toward shore, smiling and chatting among themselves. The young couple on his left wrapped their arms around each other and hugged. The man in the middle looked like an island unto himself, staring, straight ahead, his posture not encouraging conversation. He didn’t fit the profile of her fantasy man, but nonetheless, something held her attention.

He straightened and turned his back to the railing and Michelle continued her assessment. About six feet tall, around forty, square jaw, dark eyes—though at this distance she couldn’t be sure of their color. She squinted and tried harder to see. Suddenly there was a dimple between his brows and he folded his arms across his chest.

Oh, God. He was looking right at her. She’d been caught—ogling him like a woman on the prowl. Heat crept up her neck and she spun on her heel. As quickly as she could, she walked back the way she’d come and out of sight before exhaling the breath she’d been holding.

Whew! She’d have to be more discreet in the future, she lectured herself, heading for the stairway. But for now, she’d give up the game and unpack. Then she’d take a shower and change for dinner. Later, she’d take a stroll and resume her search.

Kevin stood there and stared. He watched the sun play on the woman’s copper ponytail until it sashayed out of sight.

Now what was that all about? he wondered, turning and walking in the opposite direction. Was this what he was in for all week? Single women looking for unattached males? Or maybe that one had just watched too many reruns of “Love Boat.” Either way, he’d keep to himself and watch what he said. One thing was certain. He wouldn’t let on he was a doctor. Why women found that a turn-on, he’d never understand. How many birthday dinners or concerts or parties had he been dragged away from for a patient’s needs? Unless it was the money, he couldn’t imagine what attracted them.

He stopped and looked down at the water churning below. He’d thought Jessica understood the long hours and constant interruptions. Apparently, she hadn’t.

Jessica. She’d always wanted to take a cruise, but he’d forever been too busy. Damn. When was he going to stop beating himself up over the past? He walked on, staring blindly at his loafers. Maybe this trip had been a mistake.

After changing her mind three times, Michelle settled on a silk pantsuit. The pants were cut full, the top long. The watercolor fabric in soft shades of fern green complemented her burnished hair, which she wore down tonight, the blunt-cut ends brushing her shoulders.

She stood back from the mirror behind the door and made a final inspection. Even with low-heeled pumps, she thought she looked taller than her five feet five inches. The fact that she’d lost ten pounds since Christmas added to the long, clean lines of her outfit. Months of swimming and water aerobics had paid off. Without thinking, her hand moved over her flat stomach. She could probably get away with clothes like this for several months.

She jerked her hand away and turned from the mirror. It was too soon to think this way. It was one thing to think positive, but if she continued to assume it was a done deal, she could be setting herself up for a major disappointment.

She looked at the small clutch purse on the bed, then decided to leave it behind. There was no need for money, and if her lipstick wore off, oh, well.

The Windward Dining Room was midship, two levels down. Michelle sauntered along the halls and stairway, marveling at the architectural splendor—teak rails, hand-laid tile mosaics, marble statuary, art deco murals. A person could get used to this. At the entrance to the dining room, Michelle retrieved her seat assignment card from her pants pocket and handed it to the tuxedo-clad maître d’.

She followed him up the right side, weaving her way through the lively crowd, losing sight of him toward the end. She kept moving and found him again, standing behind an empty chair at a rectangular table for six. On the side facing her she saw a young couple who had the starry-eyed look of honeymooners, seated next to a kind-faced, blue-haired woman of about seventy. Across from her she could see the back of another woman about the same age who looked as if she’d visited the same beautician. Next to her was a man. In the few seconds it took to reach her seat, she couldn’t figure out where he fit in.

Michelle’s chair was no sooner pushed in than the young man in front of her extended his hand across the table.

“Welcome aboard. I’m Mark, and this is my beautiful bride, Kathy.”

Kathy elbowed her husband and giggled before lowering her lashes. “We just got married last night,” she said shyly.

“Congratulations!” Enjoy it while you can, she wanted to add but didn’t. “I’m Michelle.” She clasped each of their hands in turn.

The older woman spoke next, her gaze lingering on the new bride beside her. “Isn’t it romantic?” Then she turned her attention to Michelle. “My name’s Millie, and this is my sister Hazel.” Millie’s head shook involuntarily, reminding Michelle of Katharine Hepburn’s later years. “Nice to meet you, Michelle.” Too far to reach, both women offered friendly waves with bejeweled freckled hands.

“Nice to meet you both.” Michelle could see the mischief dancing in their eyes, not certain what they were up to, but deciding instantly she liked the pair.

Millie laced her fingers in front of her chest and smiled expectantly. “Michelle, allow me to introduce our new friend sitting next to you.”

Michelle turned sideways in her seat, her smile still on Millie who was obviously enjoying herself immensely. Finally Michelle faced the stranger to her right. He turned his head slowly, his square jaw and gray eyes scant inches away.

Oh, no. It couldn’t be.

But it was.

She knew a blush had turned her cheeks crimson, but she could do nothing to hide it. Fighting the urge to get up and run, she held out her hand as Millie finished.

“His name is Kevin. I always liked that name. And now with Kevin Costner and all…well, well…” She fanned herself and the others laughed. All but Kevin, who held Michelle’s gaze and didn’t smile.

“Kevin?” She hadn’t meant for it to sound like a question, but it came out that way.

“Michelle?” He cocked an eyebrow and mocked her response. She was about to drop her hand when he finally took it in his. “And so we meet again.”

“Oh! You two already know each other?” Millie asked.

Michelle pulled her hand back and straightened in her chair. “Not exactly. We just…saw each other on deck earlier.”

Millie pushed on. “We haven’t had much time to get acquainted, but Kevin told us he isn’t married. Are you, Michelle?”

Hazel reached across the table and slapped her sister’s hand. “Really, Millie. You can be such a busybody.”

Michelle took a sip of water and kept her eyes on the glass. “No, I’m not,” she said quietly, not wanting to underscore her answer.

Oh, God. A whole week of sharing meals with this man. How would she ever explain her earlier actions?

The waiter came and asked if anyone cared for a cocktail. What she’d give for a good stiff drink. But after this morning’s visit to the clinic, she’d sworn off alcohol just in case…

“And you, ma’am? Would you care for something?”

“I’ll have a Virgin Mary, please.”

Kevin started to laugh, then turned it into a cough and drank some water.

She wanted to turn on him and ask, “What’s your problem?” but she kept her face forward and smiled at the newlyweds, who had all but forgotten everyone else at the table.

Millie and Hazel kept up a running commentary on the menu until orders were taken. Then, later, between dainty bites of food, they educated the table on the history of the ship.

“She was originally called the S.S. France, you know,” Millie said.

“Did you know she’s as long as the Eiffel Tower is tall?” Hazel asked the group. Heads shook and the pair prattled on, no one seeming to mind, though Michelle hadn’t a clue what Kevin’s expression was. She hadn’t looked at him once since the introduction.

When it was time for dessert, Michelle pushed out her chair and stood. “It was very nice meeting all of you, but I think I’m going to call it a night.”

“Oh, so soon?” Millie pulled an exaggerated frown.

“I think we will, too.” Mark looked into Kathy’s eyes and she nuzzled closer to his side.

“Until tomorrow.” Michelle forced a smile and turned left, purposefully avoiding eye contact with Kevin. She walked away, back straight, gait slow. From the rear, she hoped she appeared relaxed and unruffled. Inside, she wanted to scream and run from the room.

Why did he have to be at her table?

Leaving the dining room, she quickened her pace to her room. Once inside, she kicked off her shoes and dropped onto the bed.

And why did he have to be so damnably good-looking? And Kevin, no less.

She closed her eyes and recalled his reaction when they’d met. What was it she’d seen in the brief moment she allowed herself to look him in the eye? Disdain? Arrogance? Curiosity? She couldn’t be sure. It had happened so fast and so unexpectedly.

Michelle inhaled deeply and blew out slowly. Relax. She had to relax. She stretched out on her back and stared at the ceiling.

“Okay. So it was embarrassing,” she said aloud. “Now what?”

She could ask for a new seat assignment, but then how would she explain it to Millie and Hazel and the newlyweds? Millie would certainly seek her out and ask why she’d moved. Besides, she liked these people. New table companions could be a lot worse.

No. She’d stay put.

So what about Kevin? She could A, explain her actions, or B, ignore it and hope things smoothed over.

She thought a moment about A. How would she explain? Well, you see Kevin, I was artificially inseminated this morning and I was looking for a certain face to use for the fantasy father. yada, yada, yada.

Right. He’d probably swallow that.

B it was. She’d look him in the eye, whenever necessary, and pretend nothing happened.

Michelle pushed off the bed, undressed and went about her nightly routine. Having decided she’d have the breakfast buffet on deck instead of at the table, she found her romance novel and climbed naked between the cool sheets.

Puffing a second pillow behind her head, she found her place and began to read.

She gazed into his steely gray eyes, and in that fleeting moment she knew he was the one.

Michelle slammed the book shut and turned out the light.

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