Читать книгу Baby for the Midwife: The Midwife's Baby / Spanish Doctor, Pregnant Midwife / Countdown to Baby - Anne Fraser, Anne Fraser - Страница 12

THEY rose and crossed the room and strolled out through the French doors to the veranda. A soft breeze blew tendrils of hair across Georgia’s cheek and she felt Max’s gaze on her as she sat down on the swing seat. He sat next to her and his strong thigh brushed hers as they swung.

Georgia took a sip from her glass and tried to retrieve the light mood they’d shared in the dining room.

The focus had shifted suddenly so that she was aware of Max’s weight against her and the subtle scent of his aftershave even with the breeze carrying scents from the garden her way.

She remembered those crazy fantasies she’d had on the mountaintop and shifted a little on the seat.

She cleared her throat. ‘Meeandah Hospital is certainly grass roots. You might change your mind when you’ve had ten nights’ broken sleep in a row from callouts.’

Max spread one arm to encompass the vista and the other he dropped around her shoulders. ‘A hospital like we have here has fewer than one hundred and fifty births a year. That leaves me two hundred nights with sleep at least—not counting the quick births in the night that I’m told about in the morning.’

What a dream life as far as she was concerned. Imagine living here, Elsa growing up in this wonderful environment, Max as a true companion and lover, plus the best of doctors to work with. They were damned attractive thoughts but Max could never settle here.

‘Somewhere like this is a big step down,’ Georgia said as she thought of the high-powered position he’d held in the city, and even the subtle state-wide ramifications of what he achieved now, along with his visits to the hospital. His position was important to the whole scheme of obstetrics in New South Wales.

Max looked across at her. ‘Could you be happy working in a facility like this?’

‘Of course.’ Couldn’t he tell? She glanced around them at the idyllic lushness of the garden and the endless sky, and thought of the birth she had already been privileged to share. ‘If the health system will sustain it, I’d stay here for ever.’

Georgia exhaled a long blissful sigh and looked across at him. ‘This is what I love to do. Before I worked at Lower Mountains Base, I had my own home-birth practice, but nowadays I couldn’t make that kind of availability commitment with Elsa.’

‘Why is that?’

She loved it that Max seemed so interested. ‘I need the framework of other midwives around me and this sort of situation is the nearest I can get to the ideal world.’

Max sat back. ‘I would never have imagined this sleepy town could be an ideal world.’

She sighed. ‘For you it wouldn’t be. You’d miss not having the city to call on for amusement.’As she said the words, disappointment washed over her. Of course she was being unrealistic.

That was sad but true. Max would move on and she might even think about staying here when the time came for them to part, if she could be safe. Suddenly she didn’t want to think about the time when Max had moved on.

Max closed his eyes and felt her words slice into him. They hurt. When had he been bored in the last four months? When had he wanted to be anywhere but coming home to Georgia?

‘Do you know so little of me that you imagine that? Do you think me so needy of the bright lights?’ Sometimes he despaired he’d ever have a hope with this woman. She didn’t even try to understand him.

He sighed and watched her reflect back over what she’d said, but judging by her expression she still didn’t get it.

‘How could I know more about you?’ she said. ‘You don’t exactly talk about yourself. Apart from the last few weeks, I’d barely seen you except for night relief from Elsa.’

He supposed it was true, though to his mind she seemed to be everywhere. When they had rare time to talk his choice would be to hear about her, not himself.

If that was the price for her to really see him then maybe it was time he began to pay. ‘What do you want to know?’

She laughed and he wanted to kiss her—not talk about himself. Her infectious chuckle had been there since Elsa’s birth and he treasured these moments more each day.

She poked him gently with her elbow. ‘Do you realise how dangerous it is for a man to offer to tell all?’

He tilted his head. ‘I asked what you wanted to know—I didn’t promise I would tell you.’

‘Now you are being mysterious.’

And you are delicious. He swung the seat gently and she was carried with him back and forth. She wasn’t in his arms but it was better than nothing. ‘I’m not intentionally mysterious.’

‘So start with Tayla.’ Georgia folded her hands. ‘How did you meet her and what made you think you would be happy together?’

Max shook his head. ‘Why do women always start with another woman?’

‘Fine.’ She shrugged. ‘What do you want to tell me, then?’

His gaze locked with hers. ‘I’d rather tell you that I have enjoyed the last four months with you more than any I can remember.’

Georgia’s eyebrows rose in disbelief. ‘Sure,’ she said. ‘It must have been a hoot for you. You enjoyed being woken up by a colicky baby ten times a night and having a grumpy, sleep-deprived housemate to live with.’ Why on earth would he?

‘Absolutely.’The tilt of his lips confirmed that he had only pleasant memories and though he spoke quietly, his tone of voice indicated it was the truth. ‘I became acquainted with Elsa and she’s gorgeous, like her mother.’

Georgia tilted her head. ‘Same temperament, you mean?’

Max nodded. ‘She’s determined and independent, yes.’

‘Ah.’ She had him. ‘So living with me is like living with a baby with colic. I can see why you’d be attracted.’

They were teasing each other and she was beginning to enjoy it too much. This was far too dangerous for her peace of mind and she tried to steer the topic away into more general waters. Maybe he did have an agenda with her after all or he’d managed to beam in on one of her fantasies.

‘It is a glorious night,’ she said.

Max wouldn’t be diverted. ‘I appreciated each and every vision of you at night since Elsa was born.’

Georgia thought back over the range of short cotton nighties and men’s T-shirts and boxer shorts she’d worn, with her hair a mess. Not much to admire there.

He hadn’t finished and his voice brushed her skin with his breath as he turned to face her. ‘And I was privileged to see your hair wild and loose and the real you without the public face of composure that keeps me at arm’s length so very efficiently.’

This was serious stuff and she wasn’t sure where it had come from. The mood on the veranda had deepened to one of charged closeness and she couldn’t help softening against him. Georgia forced her arms to cross to block out the intimacy. To block it out because suddenly she wanted to reach across the seat and hug him for seeing a real person and not an object to own, like Sol had.

Obviously Max recognised the moment too and she must have given away more than she’d intended because she saw his surprise and the next thing he’d acted on the impulse she’d denied herself.

Very slowly but with intent his hand slid up her spine to the back of her head to hold her in place and then he leaned across and kissed her gently.

His lips savoured hers in a long slow exploration and his breath was warm as it mingled with hers.

Suddenly boneless, she sighed into him because it felt so damn wonderful and right and what she desperately wanted, and just for a moment she followed Max’s lead as she felt her fingers tighten on his shirt and she pushed her hand against him back and forth just to feel the hard heat of his chest.

But this wasn’t right. She forced her fingers open and then his shirt slipped away, just like the moment had to. The last thing Max needed was a clinging vine, he’d said himself he admired her independence, and she pushed the feelings away along with his chest because she already owed this man too much.

She could not get involved with Max. Not while Sol’s presence in her life hung over her.

She sat back and, Max being Max, he let her go. Which was a shame but the right thing to do.

For her to offer something that wasn’t really there wouldn’t be fair to Max and she was beginning to think if she let down the barriers and allowed him into her own rapidly beating heart, she would never find herself when she left.

‘Thank you, kind sir,’ was all she said, and she leaned forward to stand up. ‘I think I’ll check on Elsa.’

Max’s hand caught her wrist and the strength in his fingers halted her rising.

‘I’m sorry if I embarrassed you.’

She looked at him, at his strong jawline and then his warm golden eyes, and she said quietly, ‘You didn’t embarrass me, Max.’

‘Then why are you running away?’ His voice, too, was barely audible.

She breathed in and the faintest tinge of his aftershave remained on her skin. ‘You had a nice life before I came along.’

He laughed cynically. ‘I nearly married the wrong woman before you came along. You saved me from a fate worse than death. I’ve been very happy with you, Georgia.’

‘Tayla offered what you wanted, Max. A free life without the dramas of a family. Elsa and I have plenty of dramas. You haven’t married the right woman yet. I’m only the stopgap.’

Just when he thought they might have made progress, he’d lost her. He could see it. ‘What if it doesn’t feel that way to me?’

‘Then you would be thinking with another part of your body, not your brain.’

Ouch. She definitely wasn’t ready to change their relationship. He’d like to get his hands on that ex-husband of hers and throttle him. He was beginning to think there was more to his nastiness than she’d said. He let go of her wrist and she stood up.

She nodded and left almost at a run, and Max gazed out over the veranda. He’d scared her—but for a moment there he’d thought she was on the same wavelength as he.

Max watched a tiny meteorite arc down towards the ocean and disappear before it reached the water, a bit like the opportunity that had just passed him.

He could wait. He would have to. He would wait until she was secure in herself.

He guessed that wasn’t going to happen until she knew Elsa was safe from her father, but he hoped he, Max, wasn’t too old to enjoy it by then. It was so damn hard to keep his hands off her.

He wondered what he could do differently to dissipate the awkwardness he’d created between them.

For someone who had never had a problem with come-hither lines, he’d botched it badly. No doubt the difference being this time he was emotionally involved and becoming more so every second.

The feel of her lips against his had been as poignant as he’d anticipated. The need to feel the rest of her against him rose like Mount Warning in the distance and just as appropriately named. He would have to be patient.

Georgia gently pushed open the door to Elsa’s room and moved to stand beside the cot. Her tiny daughter lay in a shaft of moonlight and her rosy cheeks glowed with health as she sucked her lip gently in her sleep.

Why couldn’t she and Elsa have the wonderful life she had begun to suspect Max could offer her?

Because even now Max might be hurt when the time came that she had to leave with Elsa because from what he’d said tonight, he could certainly become attached to her daughter.

Max had told her he’d planned not to have children with Tayla so the same reasons were still there. Yet here she was with a baby that was anything but easy at times. The upheaval in Max’s life had been caused by a child he wasn’t even the father of.

Apart from recently, the poor man hadn’t even left the house except for work because of her and Elsa. Even Mrs White saw that.

But she, Georgia, was a mess and Max didn’t deserve that or the danger she would bring in the future.

Max had no idea how much trouble Sol could be and although she really needed to leave now, before she did any more damage, she couldn’t. It wouldn’t be safe to leave while she was still vulnerable to Sol with Elsa so young.

She glanced down at her defenceless daughter again and reality slapped her with the obvious she had begun to forget. What was she doing even contemplating her own happiness before the safety of Elsa?

As a mother she should be concentrating on her baby and setting up her future life, not fantasising about a man she could bring to ruin by association.

Her problems were not Max’s, though he obviously was beginning to think they were. They needed to avoid the type of comments and moves he’d made tonight or it was all going to become much harder. She would never be free to take on emotional issues with any man and Max didn’t deserve that.

On Tuesday morning Georgia stayed out of the kitchen until Max had gone to work.

Cowardly, but she hadn’t been able to face him, because some time in the night she had discovered that with all the reasons for not staying with Max the one that loomed largest was the fact that she’d fallen irresponsibly in love with him.

She was a fool. Though this time, at least, she had fallen for a worthy man. Which was all the more reason not to drag him into the danger she knew was ahead.

What was becoming obvious was that Max wanted more, wanted to move their relationship onto a whole new plane, and she had too much baggage to drag him down with her.

She’d just have to be careful to keep him safe by maintaining her distance. And she’d make sure Max did, too.

That night at dinner, sitting across from Max, she tried really hard not to glance out to the swing seat on the veranda and think of Max’s kiss at this time last night.

From the way he kept glancing at her, she had the feeling Max was remembering too.

‘How’s your sawdust?’ Max said conversationally.

‘Fine,’ Georgia said, as she tried to rationalise with herself about how she was doing the right thing to block Max out. Then his words sank in.

‘What did you say?’

‘We’re both chewing away diligently but I had to look again to see what I was actually eating. I think we should both accept that while it is very nice to kiss it causes problems in our day-to-day world for the moment.’

Georgia could feel the heat in her cheeks but she was glad Max had had the courage to clear the air before she’d had to.

‘I agree,’ she said, which was pretty lame but that was the best she could do at the moment. She forced herself to meet his eyes. ‘Thank you, Max, for understanding.’

‘You’re welcome. Now let’s talk of something else. You didn’t miss any obstetrics at the hospital today so I hope you have someone to play midwife with tomorrow when you go in for your next shift.’

She followed his lead gratefully. ‘You did say your statistics pointed to one birth every two days.’

‘I’m infallible. I know you enjoyed your first day.’

Georgia thought back to her first shift and smiled. ‘They even paid me to have fun and brush up on my emergency obsterics. And it worked well because I was home by three in the afternoon and still had a few hours to feed and bath Elsa before you came home. Mrs White is looking forward to tomorrow with her.’

‘So you are happy to be back at work?’

‘As long as Elsa is fine, I love it. I should at least be able to do next week and if possible a short stint full time to allow Karissa her holidays, which would give me a good basis to refresh my skills for the future.’

He raised on eyebrow in disbelief. ‘I don’t think your skills need much refreshing, Georgia. I’m extremely comfortable that you would cope with anything.’

Max’s approval meant a lot. She had been surprised how at ease she’d felt at Meeandah, but Max’s presence had been that extra insurance she’d needed to make it easier. ‘Thank you, Max.’

She avoided looking at the swing again and decided she did feel a little easier already.

‘So tell me about your day at home,’ Max said. ‘What exciting things did I miss?’

He even looked interested. ‘Big news. Elsa opens and shuts her hands now.’ Georgia smiled reminiscently. ‘You wouldn’t think something so small would captivate both of us but she lay there for ages, watching her fingers open and shut, and I had to watch, too.’

Max smiled. ‘I’ll have to ask her to show me in the morning. When you go to work she shares her breakfast with me and I read the paper to her.’

‘She’d like that.’ Not many men would do that for a child that wasn’t even his own. Georgia fell more in love with him than ever and went back to eating her sawdust to avoid his eyes.

At Meeandah hospital Georgia had agreed to three staggered morning shifts in the first week.

The idea had been to see how Elsa and Mrs White got along and how Georgia coped with being away from her daughter for the first time since Elsa’s birth.

Her second shift was uneventful.

Max came in and discharged Mel to go home. He’d issued a prescription for double-strength iron tablets to increase Mel’s red blood cell count because she hadn’t wanted the blood transfusion Max had offered after her haemorrhage.

‘Don’t expect to do much except breastfeed Billy for the first two weeks to keep building up your milk supply,’ Georgia said.

Max stood beside her to wave them off with a few cautionary words for Mel. ‘Your low blood count will slow your lactation so Billy will be extrademanding and you will be tired.’

Mel shrugged. ‘I’m too excited to be going home to worry about that. Tim’s going to do everything except feed. He’s got three weeks off work.’

‘Good man,’ Georgia said, and she slanted a sideways glance at Max. ‘Max is excellent with Elsa, too.’ The two women smiled at each other as Tim looked proudly down at his son tucked under his arm.

Max shook his hand. ‘Good luck, mate. At least the men outnumber the women in your house.’

Tim grinned and carried Billy carefully to the car and strapped him into his new baby seat next to his brother, Andy.

Both Caesarean patients, Leanne and Tanya, had decided to go home too, and after Max left the ward Georgia worked in the medical end of the hospital.

She enjoyed the challenge to brush up on the medications and treatments she didn’t deal with in obstetrics. It also gave her a chance to get to know the other nurses she might have to call on in the future.

She gathered that Flo and her colleague didn’t feel as comfortable as they’d like at the obstetric end and Georgia could see why if they only went there for the last minutes of labour or in emergencies.

‘When it’s quiet, would you be interested in practising some obstetric emergency procedures, just so you would have more of an idea what we might want you to do?’

‘That sounds great.’ Flo was in her sixties, round and energetic with a host of grandchildren she loved to talk about. Georgia loved the way she and Gerry, the other nurse, were keen to update their skills and be as helpful as they could.

Gerry was tall and thin with a mournful face, but her wicked sense of humour appeared at the strangest times. Both women’s interest in learning about obstetric emergencies encouraged Georgia to go on. ‘If you find it helpful, we could do a different emergency each shift that I’m on.’

Later that day, when all the patients were resting, Georgia went through the postpartum haemorrhage tray with Flo and Gerry.

‘I thought we’d start with the emergency we’ve already had.’ She couldn’t help thinking of the way Max had so competently directed the emergency. No doubt it was still very fresh in the minds of Gerry and Flo as well. So she was pretty sure she’d have their attention.

‘With a postpartum haemorrhage the excessive blood loss can happen for different reasons. You can have a sudden heavy bleed, like we had with Mel the other day, where the woman bleeds quickly and things need to happen fast before she goes into shock from blood loss.’

Flo nodded. ‘Shock is when the body makes changes to ensure enough blood goes to the brain isn’t it?’

‘Yep. Like Mel’s pulse rate going up because her heart has to circulate fewer blood cells faster to get enough oxygen to her brain. That’s why the patient feels faint. If a person faints, they automati-cally lower their head and make gravity at least push blood to their brain. That’s why I raised the foot of the bed for Mel’s feet to be higher than her head.’

Georgia saw that they had the concept and moved on. ‘Or you can have a woman go back to her room and bleed quietly in a steady trickle until she is in just as much trouble. They’re usually the ones who buzz because they feel faint when they get up to go to the toilet.’

‘We had a lady do that…’ Gerry nodded soulfully ‘…at my training hospital back in the bad old days. When we went to make her bed she’d trickled steadily under the covers over a couple of hours and we nearly had a fit when we went to help her get up. She nearly died.’

Flo’s mouth formed an ‘O’ of surprise. ‘So that’s why we check postnatal women for the first four hours, just like a post-operative patient gets checked in Recovery.’

Georgia nodded. ‘But remember it’s not normal for a healthy woman to do that. The body has mechanisms to prevent it, but some women don’t know they are in trouble. Basic observation is very important. Rapid emergency treatment can save lives, and that’s where having everything ready to go is so important.’

Georgia removed the haemorrhage tray from the cupboard. ‘Let’s have a look at the tray we have here. You obviously need your IV fluids, a tourniquet, your cannulas to insert into the vein for access, and connection tubing for administering the fluids. You both remember Doctor connecting these to Mel. Then there are the drugs that can help with contracting the uterus.’

Georgia held up a sheet of paper in a plastic sleeve. ‘This is the order and dose of the drugs you would need, and that can be very helpful if no one has time to repeat what they asked for.’

Gerry snorted. ‘Typical. I wish I’d known that was there, even though I did manage to get them all in order.’

Gerry acknowledged she’d worried the previous day and Georgia was glad they were talking about it again. She realised Gerry had probably been rehashing the events and needed this discussion to debrief after Monday’s excitement.

‘An emergency is a stressful time. Extra reminders are always helpful. These trays save everyone from running to find different things, too.’

Flo nodded enthusiastically. ‘Boy, do I know what you mean. Every emergency I’ve ever been in I seem to be hunting for things other people want.’

Georgia smiled. ‘The most important thing to get is help. Even the kitchen lady to write down what you gave and when and what steps you’ve taken can be good if you are short-staffed. That’s why the pad and pen are here.’

She held up a pen with a long cord attaching it to the pad. ‘We all find it difficult to get the time drugs were given exactly right even if we record an event immediately afterwards.

‘The beauty of recording events at the time is that we can make fine adjustments when we go over our treatment and actions and review later.’

Gerry snapped her fingers in enlightenment. ‘Is that what a critical review is? I thought it was when you were critical of what people did or when they’d done something wrong.’

‘No. It’s feedback to make the next situation run even more smoothly. Max is going to sit down with us later today and we’ll go over it together and see if we missed anything.’

‘I don’t think there was anything anyone could have done better,’ Gerry said dryly. ‘I thought you guys were amazing.’

‘We were a team and you and Flo were an important part of that. I think you both were pretty wonderful, too.’

On Thursday Max was called into Maternity just as he was about to go home for the evening meal and he didn’t return until after Georgia had gone to bed. They’d had a sick baby with congenital heart problems and Max had waited for MIRA to arrive to stabilise and take the baby to Newcastle Hospital with her mother.

He’d rung and let Georgia know he’d be very late and she’d sat in the dining room by herself and had then gone to bed early. She couldn’t believe how much she’d missed his company for that one evening.

She had geared her day off to when Max came home. Things she’d planned to tell him. An article she’d thought he might be interested in. And the extra time she’d taken with her appearance.

These were all warning signs that Max was assuming a larger part of her life than she’d promised herself she’d let him be.