Читать книгу Modern Romance July 2018 Books 5-8 Collection - Дженнифер Хейворд, Annie West - Страница 19
ОглавлениеSAYID LOOKED DOWN at the sleeping woman curled up at the very edge of his broad bed. Her pose was that of a child seeking comfort with her limbs tucked tight against her.
But there was nothing childlike about her body. Even now, still stunned by the roaring intensity of that powerful orgasm, his gaze roved over her hungrily. He wanted to slide his hand over those hypnotically perfect curves, taste the dark raspberry nipple that peeked at the edge of her folded arm, tangle himself in the precious silk of her hair and lose himself all over again.
No, there was nothing childlike about Lina’s body. Or about the way she’d wanted him. Another unseen jab to his body, this time lower, as he recalled her declaring she wanted to watch him come. A great shudder tore through him. Sayid had almost lost it when she said that. Only the determination to take her over the edge with him had seen him through.
Nor had there been anything innocent about the way she’d wrapped herself around him, clinging as if to stop him withdrawing. As if! Nothing on this earth could have prevented him enjoying their union to the full. Even the realisation she was, against all expectation, a virgin.
A deep breath stretched him but didn’t alleviate the strange tightness banding his ribs. He flexed his hands then clasped them behind his back, away from the temptation to reach out and touch her.
Why hadn’t she told him?
He supposed that was what she’d been going to say until he’d stopped her words, too impatient to listen.
But how could she be so innocent? She was twenty-two. She’d been living in the west for years and he had no doubt western males were no more immune to her beauty and charm than he. In fact he had proof. Look at the way that American had hung on her every word the other night. For that matter, she’d been a magnet for male attention since her teens.
While overseas, Lina had been free of the strict chaperonage usual in Halarq. Why hadn’t she taken advantage of her freedom?
Innocent she might have been, but there was no mistaking her for anything other than an incredibly sensual woman, with a profound capacity for pleasure. The fact she hadn’t given in to the natural urges of her body before intrigued him.
Sayid stifled the heavy tension brewing in his lower body. Clearly he was not going to wake her for more sex, no matter that he was, if possible, even more desperate for her than he’d been an hour ago. She’d been exquisitely responsive but her body’s tightness told its own story. She’d be sore now.
Yet he moved closer, drawn by a mix of emotions he refused to catalogue. He told himself a simple sense of responsibility topped the list. He’d seduced an innocent—a first for him as he’d scrupulously pursued only experienced women till Lina. He was obliged to care for her.
Obligation. Was that what he felt?
She shifted and his belly clenched. Were those dried tears on her cheeks?
He stood transfixed, struggling to cope with unaccustomed guilt.
She moved again and he told himself it had been a trick of the light. She was exhausted, that was all, and who could blame her? Even he had been stunned by what they’d shared.
Yet a baffling tide of emotion rose, confounding him. He needed to do something, fix things. Except nothing could undo what he’d done.
And, the savage inside him acknowledged, he didn’t want to. A more civilised man would regret stealing her virginity. Sayid couldn’t.
Hell, no decent man would proposition her the way he had!
Yet Sayid wouldn’t change a thing. How could he when his craving for Lina was unchanged? In fact it was stronger than before. At least before tonight he hadn’t savoured her fiery passion, hadn’t watched her come apart for him, or drowned his senses in her welcoming body.
Enough!
He was hard with a carnal hunger that had barely eased, despite the long, cold shower he’d endured. But he wouldn’t act...not yet.
Nor could he let her go. He knew his limits and he was far too selfish for that. But he could at least respect her need to rest.
Sayid bent and picked up the sheet, pulling it up over Lina’s shoulder, covering her nakedness.
* * *
Lina didn’t know what woke her. She was cocooned in the most scrumptiously comfortable bed, content as a cat in the sun. She’d never felt so good.
Lazily she stretched and instantly registered two things. The hint of heaviness inside, up between her thighs, and the fact she wasn’t curled up on a sheet but on a body.
Her eyes snapped open. In the faint grey pre-dawn light she saw her pillow was a male chest, powerful and with a light covering of black hair. A second later she realised the steady pulse in her ears wasn’t hers, but came from that same chest, where she rested her head.
‘Good morning.’ The sound rumbled up from beneath her.
Lina had thought nothing could match the intimacy of making love with Sayid, but waking with him, feeling the throb of his heart and the ripple of his baritone voice, made her experience again the connection that had dazzled her last night.
To her consternation, nerves hit. It was one thing allowing him to sweep her into a firestorm of longing where, in her greed for him, she abandoned any trace of modesty. It was another to face him the morning after.
Hands splayed on his warm chest, she lifted her head.
Even in this dim light he was stunning, his charisma due as much to that aura of strength as the slightly stern yet wholly handsome features. His jaw was dark with the hint of a beard and his eyes mesmerising.
Lina felt them bore right into her, probing her secrets, stripping away whatever layers of protection she retained against him. Her breath caught. Sayid was beautiful in the pared back, almost harsh way of the desert, sculpted by wind and sun yet with a magnificence that stole the breath.
‘Good morning,’ she croaked. It was hard to believe last night wasn’t a fantasy, despite waking against him.
Then, abruptly, his mouth widened into a smile and something contracted deep inside her chest. Last night he’d been serious, his smile tight. Sometimes he’d even looked as if he was in pain. This...this was glorious.
Sayid lifted his head and crushed her lips with his. Instantly Lina opened her mouth, leaning in for more, but he was already pulling back.
‘How are you this morning, Lina?’ Despite the approval in those gleaming eyes, his tone was serious.
‘Fine. And you?’
He shook his head. ‘How are you really? I wasn’t as...gentle as I might have been. Are you hurting?’
Something within her, some shred of the cloistered girl she’d once been, shrivelled in embarrassment. But Lina reminded herself she was a new woman. A woman who made her own decisions. Who reached out for what she wanted. Who wasn’t ashamed of her feelings, or the bargain she’d made with Sayid. Who’d positively revelled in what they’d done last night.
‘No.’ Then, when his eyes narrowed, ‘Not really sore.’ It was more an awareness of part of her body she’d never felt before. But that was too much detail.
‘You should have told me.’ His expression turned grave, his smile fading. ‘Before we went to bed.’
Lina levered herself higher, putting distance between them, till one hot, sinewy arm wrapped around her waist, anchoring her to him. Nerves jumped beneath her skin and suddenly that awareness of her body became a throb of emptiness.
Did it really take so little to make her ready for Sayid? Not just ready but eager?
Of course she’d need more than one measly night to satisfy her greed for him. It was nothing to worry about, despite last night’s fears she was in over her head.
‘Why? Would you have stopped? Would you have withdrawn your proposition?’
His nostrils flared as he breathed hard, his chest pushing up against her. Lina was aware of him all down her body, including, she realised, the solid ridge of his erection against her inner thigh. Restlessly she shifted, discovering a fine layer of cotton separating their lower bodies. Strange how familiar and enticing, yet how shockingly...dangerous they felt together.
Sayid’s other hand clamped her bare buttocks, holding her still, which was when she realised he wore loose trousers. Why? Because he didn’t want more sex? But that erection surely proved—
‘Stop twitching!’ His voice was terse, almost hoarse.
Lina blinked, absorbing the tension in his starkly beautiful features. A tension that hadn’t been there earlier.
Because she’d rubbed against him? The possibility she wielded such power was exciting yet a tiny bit scary. This was all so new. New and, she decided as she tilted her hips just a fraction, delicious.
‘Lina!’ His voice was pure growl this time. She was still absorbing the feral sound when he surged up, flipping her over onto her back and weighing her down with his tall frame, his thighs bracketing hers as if to stop her escaping.
Lina had no wish to escape. Every part of her body stirred and snapped with energy. Her blood fizzed and everywhere they touched she felt tingles of—
His mouth covered hers and instantly she was lost. His mouth, the slow, deliberate, possessive slide of his tongue against hers, was the epicentre of her world. His kiss drew her back into that swirling, sensual realm of pleasure she’d discovered last night.
Lina’s hands moulded his hard chest then insinuated themselves up, over his shoulders, to anchor in his hair, pressing him close.
When he pulled his head up from the kiss they were both breathing heavily. Reluctantly she opened her eyes.
Sayid’s mouth was a thin line, taut as if with displeasure.
‘What is it?’ Lina wanted to smooth away the furrow at the centre of his forehead almost as much as she wanted him to kiss her again.
Because it’s not just sex you want, is it? You care for him.
The truth ripped through her languid feeling of well-being.
As if he needs you to care or look after him.
The idea of Sayid, capable, clever and in command of a whole nation, needing anyone, much less someone like her to care for him was patently absurd.
That didn’t stop her lifting her head and planting a kiss on his jaw, then another, till he reared even further back, creating distance between them. Her head fell back onto the pillow, a discomfiting twist tightening her chest.
He disapproved of her kissing him uninvited?
Sayid shook his head as if clearing his thoughts. When he spoke his voice was harsh. ‘You asked if I’d have stopped last night if I knew you were a virgin.’ He hefted a breath that expanded his chest mightily. ‘It would be nice to say yes, I’d have stopped, but it’s not true.’ His gaze bored into her. ‘I’ve always tried to be an honourable man and deflowering virgins is something I’ve avoided. But with you...’ Again that quick shake of his head as if exasperated. ‘From the moment you appeared in the doorway last night you were destined for my bed, Lina. Nothing would have held me back.’
He didn’t look happy about it. In fact he looked positively grim. Whereas Lina glowed, hearing his words. It had been the same for her. She’d tried so long to argue herself out of wanting Sayid but nothing, neither logic nor pride had stopped her.
‘I’m glad,’ she whispered, lifting her hand to his jaw, fascinated by the way his eyelids flickered as she caressed the roughened skin there. ‘I didn’t want you to hold back. I want you to want me.’
* * *
Sayid’s bark of laughter was short and sharp. Even the gentle touch of her soft fingers across his chin weakened his resolve to take things slow and gentle this morning out of consideration for her untried body.
‘Oh, I want you all right, Lina. The problem is restraining myself.’
That luxurious mouth pouted, making his gut contract and his need spike. ‘I don’t want you restrained.’ He felt the hitch of her soft breasts teasing his chest, and realised he’d forgotten to keep his distance and had sunk down again, lying over her skin to skin. ‘I just want you.’
Her words painted a picture he tried to dismiss and couldn’t. Of giving himself up utterly to his need for her.
‘I’m glad you’re so eager after your first time.’ He’d feared she’d be wary this morning, possibly regretting her decision to come to him, or at least feeling sore and disinclined for sex. Still, she didn’t understand what she was saying. She had no idea what a demanding lover he could be.
Sleeping beside her all night, or more accurately lying awake fighting the urge to have her again, had been one of the most difficult things Sayid had done.
‘But why wait till now to lose your virginity?’ That had troubled him through the long, frustrating night. ‘I assumed you’d had lovers before, especially since you’re not interested in marriage. Yet you saved yourself, as if for marriage.’
Lina’s gaze slid from his, her eyelids dropping to veil her bright eyes. Instantly Sayid was alert. He’d touched a nerve and, judging by her reaction, she didn’t want to discuss it.
‘It’s no big deal, is it? Everyone has a first time.’
Sayid put his weight on one arm and with his other hand tipped her chin up till she couldn’t escape his scrutiny.
‘What are you hiding, Lina?’
Her eyes opened wide. He wanted to read her thoughts, her secrets, but he found himself drowning in that brilliant purple-blue gaze.
‘I’m not hiding anything.’ Yet he caught the thread of agitation in her voice and in her quickening heartbeat, hammering against him.
She must have read his scepticism for she snatched a quick breath. Sayid had to fight to ignore how her nipples scraped against him as her breasts lifted.
‘Look, I grew up in a traditional house, okay? My mother might have been a dancer once, and her reputation suffered with the old biddies in the town as a result, but if anything that made her even more determined to protect mine. The only men I saw growing up were relatives and close friends of the family, usually my father’s age. I had no chance or inclination to go to bed with a man. Especially when I saw the way some of them looked at my mother, despite the fact she was married.’
Sayid experienced a ripple of distaste. He guessed the young Lina hadn’t had a good opinion of the men she’d met. And then there were her cousins, trying to take advantage of her in her own home.
‘I was brought up to think the only man I’d sleep with would be my husband.’
‘Until your uncle sent you here.’ A sliver of guilt needled Sayid. He hadn’t taken advantage of her then, but now—
‘And you gave me an opportunity I could never have imagined.’ Her smile broke his train of thought. ‘For the first time you gave me power over my own life. You gave me my freedom, and the right to choose.’
‘But you didn’t exercise that choice while you were overseas. Why not?’ Increasingly he found it hard to concentrate. Partly because of that sunshine of a smile beaming up at him and partly because lying body to body was too arousing. He wanted to get to the bottom of Lina’s decision but his need to know was becoming obscured by the need for sex.
Her expression sobered, even as she lifted her hand to smooth her palm over the upper slope of his chest. Tingles of want spread through his body.
‘Why should I? It’s not something to rush into. Does it really matter since in the end I chose you?’
Sayid struggled to think, to process the meaning behind Lina’s words. On the face of it, no, it didn’t matter. He should be pleased she’d taken up his scandalous proposition and gave herself to him.
Yet there was something...cagey about her. He sensed an unwillingness to talk on this. A disinclination to discuss something so personal? Or maybe someone had broken her heart while she was away? If he discovered someone had hurt her...
Anger throbbed through him at the idea, but before it could take hold Lina linked her fingers around his neck and tugged, inviting his kiss.
For a moment Sayid withstood the invitation. His gut warned she was holding something back and it bothered him that he had no idea what it was. He didn’t like mysteries, especially as he sensed this could be important.
‘Sayid? Don’t you want to kiss me?’ Her expression grew tentative and he heard the tiniest hint of a tremor in her voice. It was a reminder of her almost total lack of experience.
‘How can you doubt it?’ He moved, angling his body so his erection aligned perfectly between her legs.
Her eyelids fluttered as he tilted his hips, pressing so that, if he hadn’t put on loose trousers, he’d be entering her. His pulse jumped at the thought.
Seconds later he was skimming the trousers down his legs and kicking them off, reaching across to the bedside table for protection.
Postponing the discussion was a deliberate decision, he assured himself as he rolled on the condom. Lina’s reticence was natural modesty, that was all. He didn’t need to understand everything about her to enjoy sex with her.
In the past it had suited him perfectly not to delve too deep into the thoughts and motivations of his lovers. It was all part of keeping a suitable detachment.
Ruthlessly Sayid muted the voice protesting that he wanted to understand everything about Lina. Proclaiming too that his urgency now was proof that his vaunted self-restraint had cracked, if not shattered.
Sayid stilled, trying to summon that restraint.
Then Lina put her hand on his chest, right above his thudding heart. Her fingers slid slowly down, over ribs that tightened at her touch, skimming his belly that twitched and trembled at the caress. Lower.
Explosions detonated through his body as her small hand closed tentatively around him. Sayid’s breath stalled as her fist glided down his length then paused. The arm propping him up on the bed shook like a Bedouin tent in a sandstorm.
‘Harder.’ The word was gruff, almost indecipherable. Yet Lina understood. Her grip firmed as it slid, centimetre by torturously slow centimetre, back to the tip.
Sayid shut his eyes as they rolled back in his head. Her caress wasn’t practised or smooth but he’d never felt such raw delight at a woman’s touch.
Why? The word drummed an incessant staccato beat in his head.
But it was drowned by the rush of blood evacuating his brain and heading lower. He’d been stiff as a board but now he grew in her hand, pressing into that warm caress that slid down his shaft then up, more confident and devastating with each pass.
Dimly Sayid recalled the need for control, but it was swept away as he bucked into Lina’s hold, unable to stop himself.
He snapped his eyes open, falling into her violet gaze. The rich scent of roses and female arousal filled the air.
She squeezed him and he jolted. Any second now...
Gritting his teeth, Sayid plucked her hand away, shuddering at the slide of her fingers against his erection.
He saw a protest form on those plump lips but he wasn’t in the mood for conversation. His mouth crashed down on hers in a kiss that was barely short of brutal, devouring her with a hunger he was past restraining.
Sayid covered her mound with his hand, relishing the way she tilted up into his touch. That was it. He just needed to check... Yes. Triumph stirred. Lina was ready for him.
He’d learned how to make foreplay an art, priding himself on his patience, ensuring his lover’s satisfaction first. But now there was no time for subtlety or patience. He braced himself over her and with one purposeful thrust, pushed hard, harder, only to find himself sliding with incredible ease right to her core.
Stunned eyes, the colour of mountain irises, met his. For an instant the world held steady. Then, before he had time to expend the breath cramming his lungs, or even think about technique, the pressure hit like a runaway train, smashing into him.
Lina clenched around him again and again, a flush tinting her bare breasts, throat and cheeks, a look of astonishment on her face.
Then Sayid was incapable of noticing anything but the unholy tightness in his groin, the rush of volcanic pleasure pulsing through him, and the tug of muscles stretched to breaking point as instinct took over and he pumped frantically into oblivion.
Dimly he heard a guttural cry of triumph and a sob of what he hoped was feminine delight, as his strength gave way and he crashed down on Lina.
He had to move away. He had to get off her. But the strength had seeped from his body. Besides, there was a warm, rhythmic stroke over his back that urged him not to move. His head was in the curve of Lina’s shoulder, his chest crushing her.
Finally, gathering his wits, he lifted his weight onto his elbows. Instantly she murmured a protest, her arms wrapping around his back, pulling as if to tug him down. Sayid pressed a kiss to the slick, perfumed skin of her neck, then forced himself to roll away, onto his side. The slide of their exquisitely sensitive bodies separating made him shudder.
At last he lay on his back, trembling. Undone.
He’d thought last night a pinnacle of physical pleasure.
This was...miraculous. Appallingly, outrageously, infinitely better than he’d experienced before.
His befuddled brain tried to compute a reason for it. His longish stint of celibacy. Muddled perception after a sleepless night. Some secret thrill at bedding a virgin.
No. Nothing accounted for it.
Sayid huffed a laugh. Maybe, after years of practice, he’d just got it right for the first time. The way he felt, anything was possible.
‘What’s so funny?’
‘Me. My brain’s short-circuited.’ Eyes still closed, he reached out and groped for her hand. ‘Are you okay?’
‘I’m not sure.’ Lina hesitated and despite believing he’d never move again, Sayid found himself propped on one arm, looking down at her. Lina’s hair was spread behind her like a dark halo, her raspberry-tipped breasts trembled with each shaky breath she took and her skin was flushed.
‘Did I hurt you?’ His belly crawled at the idea.
Instantly that vibrant gaze meshed with his. Another tiny tremor, like an echo of rapture, wove through him.
‘Of course not. It was...’ She shook her head. ‘I don’t have words. But you didn’t hurt me. I just never knew anything could feel so good. I feel...changed.’ She chewed on her lip. ‘Is it always like this?’
Relief made him smile. ‘Rarely. Obviously we’re very attuned to each other.’
‘Oh. That explains it.’ She rolled onto her side, moving close. ‘Will you hold me please? I feel... I don’t want to be alone.’
Sayid stared down at the woman burrowing into his chest and told himself he didn’t do cuddles. Post-coital snuggling was to be avoided in case a lover began to get sentimental. It had been a problem in the past occasionally, despite his precautions.
But instead of moving away, Sayid slipped his left arm under her head, pulling her across so she was draped over him. His right arm wrapped automatically around her, drawing her snug against him.
‘Nice,’ she murmured in a blurred voice and despite himself Sayid grinned.
But as Lina fell into an untroubled sleep and the rising sun sent shafts of pink and apricot across the room, his smile died.
He’d lost control, spectacularly. And, if he was honest with himself, he’d do it again in an instant if there was a chance of experiencing something like that exaltation as he lost himself in Lina.
Lina. That was what was different.
He’d told himself sex with Lina was like sex with any other woman, but it wasn’t true.
She had some effect on him he didn’t understand. She’d decimated his command of himself. No, obliterated it.
Gut instinct warned of trouble. What sort he couldn’t fathom. But there was something about Lina that threatened more than his tight rein over his sensual nature.
He could walk away from this deal, tell her one night had been enough and a week wasn’t necessary.
Except, he realised as his hold on her tightened and his soul howled silently in protest, he didn’t want to. For the first time in his adult life Sayid found himself unable to master his desire.
He wanted her and he intended to keep her.
For a week. That was all.
What disruption could a single week cause?
