Читать книгу One Night Of Consequences Collection - Ким Лоренс, Annie West - Страница 47
ОглавлениеIN THE END it took her an hour to put Nadeena to sleep and when she went looking for Nadir she wasn’t expecting to find him barefoot and shirtless with a dark-haired woman bending over his lap.
The sight shocked her and suddenly a long-lost memory of her fifteen-year-old self flew into her mind. She’d been with a bunch of friends on a school excursion when they had come across her father in a passionate embrace with a woman who wasn’t her mother. The woman’s hands had been in her father’s hair, his hand close to her breast, his mouth devouring hers. Imogen had been stunned. Sickened. The girls with her had giggled nervously and her father hadn’t even looked contrite. He’d scowled at her and asked her why she wasn’t in school. God, she hadn’t remembered that in years.
The woman in the white abaya straightened and Imogen saw she was holding an empty silver tray and a tumbler of Scotch sat on the low table beside the sofa.
Imogen did a double-take when she realised that the woman was a servant who was now retreating from the room. Her mind had put two and two together and come up with ten. Maybe she was more tired than she’d realised...
‘You must be Imogen?’
Whirling around at the sound of a deep male voice, Imogen saw a man bearing a striking resemblance to Nadir standing over by the keyhole windows. He looked tall and imposing in his traditional white robes and matching headdress and Imogen knew that there was no way she would have missed him if she hadn’t been so riveted by the sight of Nadir’s impressive chest.
‘Imogen, this is my brother, Zachim. Zach, this is Imogen.’
Zachim nodded, his eyes glinting amber-gold in the softly lit room as he regarded her. ‘I remember you from the dance hall and it’s a pleasure to finally meet you.’
Feeling trapped by her pent-up emotions and unsure what Nadir had told him, Imogen was uncertain as to how to proceed. It seemed highly improper to let rip with the frustration and angst clawing at the inside of her throat and yet she didn’t want to wait till morning to discuss things with Nadir. It seemed important to do so now. ‘I’m sorry; I didn’t mean to interrupt. Perhaps you can let me know when you’re free.’
‘I thought you were going to bed?’
The easy familiarity with which Nadir spoke to her in front of his brother made her instantly defensive. ‘Why—because you told me to?’
‘No. Because you look like you’re about to fall over with exhaustion.’
Imogen glared at Nadir and felt even worse when his brother cleared his throat discreetly from behind her. ‘I think I should leave you both alone.’
‘No, please.’ She was horrified at what he must think of her. ‘I didn’t mean to interrupt you.’
Prince Zachim smiled but it was weary. ‘You didn’t. My brother is being his usual obstinate self. Maybe you can talk some sense into him. He won’t listen to me.’
Imogen was about to say that Nadir didn’t listen to her either when he rose from the sofa and the sight of all those hard muscles rippling across his abdomen as he moved made the words fly out of her head.
‘I’m not going to change my mind, Zach.’
‘It’s your birthright.’
‘If you’re feeling guilty about taking something from me then don’t. I don’t want anything to do with Bakaan.’
‘Nadir, I know you’re still angry about the past but—’
Nadir made a motion with his hand that cut his brother off. ‘Goodnight, Zach.’
Zachim scowled. ‘All right, Nadir, You win this round.’
‘Hallelujah.’ Nadir’s voice held no enthusiasm and Imogen wondered what it was Nadir was still angry about and what exactly Zach was taking from him.
‘I have to fly to the mountains early tomorrow,’ Zachim said as he turned to go. ‘But I’ll be back by noon.’
‘I’ll be waiting.’
Zachim gave her a weary smile. ‘Lovely to meet you, Imogen. I’m not sure if I should congratulate you on your impending marriage to my brother or offer commiserations.’ His smile held a touch of irony. ‘But I definitely look forward to getting to know you and to meeting my niece over lunch tomorrow.’
Imogen smiled warmly. As handsome and dashing as he was, this brother didn’t tie her insides up in knots like Nadir did. ‘I look forward to it.’
Zach looked back at Nadir as if he wanted to say more but Nadir gave him a faint smile. ‘Give it up, Zach. You’re perfect for the role and you know it. And stop flirting with my fiancé.’
‘Nadir!’
His name left her lips in an appalled reprimand but Zach just laughed heartily.
‘You might not like being back in Bakaan, brother, but I like you being here’
* * *
Nadir watched his brother give him a mocking salute and stride out of the room and knew that he was doing the right thing in giving Zach the leadership role. They had different mothers and therefore vastly different experiences of their father and their homeland. And it wasn’t just anger or resentment at the past that stopped Nadir wanting to be the next King; it was also the painful memories that haunted him every time he was here. It was the sense of guilt his brother would never understand because Nadir had never told him of the cowardly role he’d played in his mother and sister’s deaths. The feelings of shame and ineptitude. A feeling of emptiness.
If he’d thought the people of Bakaan really needed him, if he thought he could add some value Zach couldn’t as leader then he might do it. But the fact was Zach was a capable military leader and was perfect for the job.
‘I apologise if I ruined your conversation with your brother. It wasn’t my intention.’
He eyed Imogen still standing in the middle of the room and picked up his Scotch, hoping it would distract him from his bleak thoughts. He knew a way she could distract him as well but he didn’t think she’d be as biddable as the Scotch. Unfortunately. ‘You didn’t; he was leaving anyway.’
She chewed the inside of her lower lip and he couldn’t take his eyes off the little movement.
‘Are you okay?’
Her soft question made him gulp a mouthful of the fiery liquid and he relished the burn of it down his throat. No, he wasn’t okay. ‘Concerned for my welfare, habibi? I’m touched.’
He saw her posture stiffen and regretted taking his frustration out on her. But hell, she was partly to blame. Sorting out the leadership issue would be over and done within a matter of hours. Sorting out the rest of his life with a wife and child... He didn’t want to contemplate how long that would take. Particularly given the light of defiance burning hotly in Imogen’s eyes. A defiance he had yet to fully understand.
‘Don’t be,’ she responded smartly. ‘It was an aberration that won’t happen again.’
He smiled. He hadn’t realised she was so feisty when they’d been together back in Paris. Back then she’d always been thrilled to see him, delight written all over her expressive face. And it had been catching. For those all too brief weekends he’d been happy too. Perhaps that had been her allure. That and the red-hot chemistry between them. ‘Whatever you’ve got to say can wait until morning.’
‘Really?’ Her eyebrows arched skyward. ‘Because you decreed it, My Lord?’
No, she definitely hadn’t been this feisty in Paris but part of him—the part that turned caveman every time she was around—liked it a little too much for comfort. ‘Yes. That and the dark circles under your eyes which suggest you need sleep more than conversation.’
‘I’m sorry you don’t approve of the way I look.’ She dipped into a mocking curtsy. ‘I’ll try to do better next time, My Lord.’
‘I wouldn’t use that term too often,’ he advised softly, tossing back another finger of Scotch. ‘I might like it.’
She scowled at him but her eyes followed his hand as he rubbed it across his chest and his blood surged as he saw the breath catch in her throat. He’d forgotten Zach had interrupted his shower. Did the sight of him bother her? He’d sure as hell be bothered if she was standing before him half naked. Hell, he was bothered anyway and she still had on her crumpled clothes from earlier.
A spike of conscience needled him. She might still be as beautiful as ever but she really did look worn to the bone. His eyes scanned over her body and came to rest on her chest. And she was braless.
‘So, anyway...’ She cleared her throat and his eyes rose from her round, full breasts to the pulse point beating like a small trapped bird inside her creamy throat. ‘I’ve looked up some options I’d like to go through with you.’
With his instincts pulling at him to go to her and haul her up against him and tame that defiant look in her eyes until she softened and became once again pliant and wanton in his arms, Nadir forced his mind to recall her words. ‘Options’ was the only word that had stuck but he knew she wouldn’t want to discuss the options he was presently interested in. ‘Now is not a good time.’
‘I disagree.’
Of course she did. ‘You had ample opportunity to talk on the plane. You chose not to.’
She perched on the edge of the sectional sofa and faced him. ‘Nadeena was awake the whole time. I didn’t want her to realise how tense I was. At this age babies feel everything the mother feels.’
He gave a short laugh. ‘If that’s true you wouldn’t have fooled her. Even a blind man could see you were about ready to snap in half.’
‘And whose fault is that?’
‘Mine, no doubt. Did she go to sleep easily?’
Her lips tightened. ‘Yes, thank you.’
‘Thank you?’
‘For asking, I suppose.’ Frustration flashed in her green eyes. ‘I...can we just stay on topic?’
‘By all means. But you can stop treating me like a stranger. I’m not.’
‘You are.’ She rubbed the back of her neck as if it ached and rolled her slender shoulders. ‘But I didn’t come out here to argue with you.’
Nadir took another swallow of Scotch. ‘What did you come out here for?’
The air between them thickened and he nearly said to hell with arguing; it was time to relieve some of the tension between them.
‘To talk.’
‘I’ve got a better idea.’
She frowned and he saw the moment the meaning behind his rough words became clear because her gorgeous eyes widened in shock. ‘I hope you don’t mean what I think you mean.’
‘Oh, I definitely mean exactly what you think I mean.’
She gasped softly. ‘How can you think about sex at a time like this?’
He thought about sex with her all the time. ‘Too soon for you, habibi? That’s okay. I’m a patient man. I can wait.’
‘Look, Nadir—’
‘Look, Imogen.’ He scrubbed a weary hand across his face. ‘I’m not in the mood for a discussion. We can talk tomorrow after one o’clock.’
‘Why? What happens at one o’clock?’
At one o’clock one of his pesky loose ends would be resolved. ‘It’s not important.’
Her eyes narrowed. ‘Does it have to do with what your brother was talking about before?’
‘It doesn’t matter.’
‘It seemed to matter to him.’
‘He’ll get over it.’
Her lashes fluttered down to hide her frustrated gaze. ‘Keep your secrets. I don’t want to know them anyway.’
‘It’s not a secret. I have business to sort out in Bakaan that doesn’t concern you.’
‘Fine.’ Her tone implied it was anything but fine. ‘Let’s stay on topic and discuss something that does concern me.’
‘By all means let’s stay on topic. Tomorrow.’
* * *
Imogen didn’t like the way his gaze swept over her and wished she’d kept her bra on after Nadeena had gone to sleep because every time his eyes dropped to her chest her nipples peaked. She just hoped that the lighting from the lamps was low enough that he wouldn’t notice. Not that she couldn’t see every muscle shifting on his torso. He raised his hand to rub at the smattering of hair on his chest again and Imogen barely resisted the urge to fan herself. Stay on topic yourself, she admonished silently.
The last thing she needed right now was to think about the offer he’d just made. Which only reinforced his playboy mentality.
I’m a patient man. I can wait.
So much for her earlier assumption that he didn’t want to sleep with her. The man would obviously sleep with anyone but he’d be waiting a long time if he thought he could use her to slake his hunger for a night. Been there, done that and now had the baby to prove it! A baby who didn’t need him.
Deciding that starting with that statement would be like waving a red flag at an irritated bull, she went straight to the second half of her plan instead.
‘So.’ She cleared her throat yet again. ‘Given that you said that you wanted to be part of Nadeena’s life, I looked up some alternative options for us that don’t include marriage.’
‘Good for you.’
His response was frosty but at least it cooled the air between them and she wouldn’t let it put her off. She narrowed her eyes as he crossed his ankle over his knee and then she calmly folded her hands in her lap. ‘So it’s obviously not an in-depth analysis, but from what I can tell there’s legal custody and physical custody and they’re quite different from each other.’
‘Are they?’
His laconic response reeked of disinterest and Imogen did her best to cap her irritation. ‘Yes. They are. Legal custody is about who makes decisions for the child and can be sole or joint and physical custody is about seeing the child. Again, that can be either sole or joint and that breaks down into supervised and unsupervised and even virtual visits nowadays.’ She took a deep breath and rushed on before he could interject. ‘There’s also the issue of how to split the time and it seems that the most popular is for the father to visit the child every second weekend and on public holidays. Unless you want to go the virtual route, of course.’
‘Of course.’
Imogen waited for him to say more. When he just smiled and curved his hands behind his head she suspected he was toying with her. ‘Well?’ she prompted stiffly.
‘I can see you’ve put quite a bit of effort into this.’
Imogen sucked in a litre of air and released it slowly. Perhaps she’d been wrong and he wasn’t toying with her. Perhaps he was going to be cooperative and let her go. ‘Not really.’ She gave him a small smile that seemed to stretch her dry lips to the point of cracking. ‘But it’s a start.’
And, perversely, the possibility that he might agree with her didn’t thrill her the way she had imagined it would. Instead, she felt unaccountably disappointed and realised just how much she still wished that their relationship in Paris could have progressed like so many other happy couples did. Couples like Minh and David, who loved each other so much they would do anything for the other person.
She sighed. What had her mother always said? If wishes were horses, beggars would ride. Such an old-fashioned saying, passed down through the generations. Would she pass it on to Nadeena with that same air of inevitability?
‘Tell me,’ he began conversationally, ‘did the Internet mention the custody arrangements for a woman who kept her child’s birth a secret from its father?’
No, he was not going to be cooperative and icy shivers tripped down her spine as she saw that she had angered him again ‘No,’ she bit out tersely.
‘Then you’re right—’ his smile was even tighter than hers ‘—when you say that your analysis isn’t very complete. And furthermore,’ he drawled with icy control, ‘while you might be happy sharing custody of our daughter, I am not.’
‘I’m not either,’ she replied hotly. ‘But you’re not giving me any other choice.’
‘On the contrary; I’ve given you the best choice there is,’ he drawled arrogantly.
‘Marrying you?’
She could see instantly that he’d taken offence to her contemptuous tone from the stillness of his big body but dammit, he didn’t love her. If he did...if he did then things might be different...
‘This is all something you should have thought about before you ran away,’ he bit out contemptuously.
‘I did not run away,’ she retorted. ‘I left.’
He made a low noise in the base of his throat that startled her. ‘I told you I would return and we’d talk about options.’ His eyes glittered dangerously. ‘You weren’t there.’
‘Like abortion?’ she spat, remembering how cold she had felt reading his missive. How icy she had felt in his apartment when he had confirmed that yes, he’d have preferred not to be an expectant father.
‘No, not that.’
He lost colour and tugged a hand through his hair as if the thought truly horrified him.
‘Well, it probably would have happened if you had pushed for that horrible paternity test you told me I had to take.’
His brows drew together. ‘A paternity test made sense.’
‘Do you have any idea how dangerous those tests are?’
‘No, I—’
‘About one in three hundred amniocenteses end in miscarriage and I would have needed the earlier test. With the CVS you can double the chance of a miscarriage. But then that would have worked a lot better for you than this, wouldn’t it?’
Nadir jumped to his feet, his movements lacking their usual grace. ‘For the love of all things holy, Imogen, I would never have put you or our baby’s life at risk. You must know that.’
Imogen wrapped her arms around her stomach, all the anger leaching out of her as he stood before her all ferocious and earnest as if he meant what he was saying.
Did he?
She didn’t know. What she did know was that she didn’t want to be forced to do something stupid that they would both later regret because Nadeena would be the one to pay the ultimate price when things turned bad. Still, a twinge of regret spiked inside her chest. The way he’d said ‘our baby’, as if he really felt something for Nadeena already. ‘And you would have just accepted that I not take the test, I suppose,’ she scoffed.
‘Of course I would have accepted it.’ He settled his hands on his hips. ‘At what stage in our relationship did I ever show you that I was unreasonable?’
Imogen tapped her foot and wanted to say all the time. But the truth was that he had never been unreasonable towards her. Ever. He had always been thoughtful and kind. Loving. A lie she couldn’t afford to be swayed by again. ‘Now. You’re being unreasonable now.’
‘That’s a matter of opinion.’
‘Damn it, Nadir.’ A flash of renewed irritation surged inside her. ‘You can’t keep me here against my will.’
‘Actually, I can,’ he said with all the arrogance of a man born to privilege. ‘But I won’t.’ He paused, ran his hand across his stubbled jaw. ‘I will, however, stop you from taking Nadeena away from me again.’
Imogen’s insides seized and she knew her face went pale, her breathing laboured. ‘I hate you.’ Because he’d just effectively narrowed her choices down to marriage to him or give up her child.
He nodded as if this was normal. As if she hadn’t dreamt of him and wished in her darkest moments that he wouldn’t come for her. Tell her that he missed her. Tell her that he loved her. Tell her that he couldn’t live without her. Dreams not worth the sleep they had interrupted.
‘A child deserves to be raised by both parents.’ He regarded her steadily. ‘Or are you going to argue with me about that too?’
‘Only if both parents love and want her.’
‘I agree.’
Imogen clamped her mouth mutinously closed and turned her attention to the intricate patterns on the Persian rug at her feet before she said something she’d truly regret.
Nadir sighed. ‘Believe it or not, Imogen, I only have Nadeena’s best interests at heart.’
‘Do you?’
‘Yes.’ She heard a hardness enter his voice at her scepticism.
She looked at him and all the fight left her and a great sense of doom pervaded her limbs. ‘And what if a marriage between us is the worst thing for her?’
He looked genuinely perplexed by her question. ‘I don’t see how it could be.’
‘Because it would be nothing but a marriage of convenience.’
‘I don’t see it that way.’
She blew out a frustrated breath. ‘How can you not?’
He stepped in front of her, breathing as hard as she was. ‘Because there’s nothing remotely convenient about marriage and ours will be real.’
Real? Imogen swallowed heavily and lost her breath. ‘I hope you don’t mean what I think you mean.’
‘We will be man and wife in every sense of the word, habibi,’ he said softly with the same confidence she had once loved.
Imogen’s chin jutted forward. ‘I didn’t think you were into force.’
She knew that if she revealed just how badly he affected her it would be akin to lying down and waving a white flag. So she held her breath as his eyes ran over her face and down over her throat and willed herself not to move, silently urging her racing heartbeat to slow to a moderate gallop.
As if he couldn’t help himself, he raised his hand and brushed his thumb across her lips in a whisper-soft caress that made every one of her nerve endings tingle. For a long moment they just stared at each other and then he ruined the moment by speaking. ‘Force, habibi?’
The gentle words mocked her and she jerked back and stepped away from him, doing her best to ignore the way the blood pounded heavily through her body and highlighted her inability to control her attraction to him. No man had ever affected her so deeply that she forgot who she was and where she was and she refused to give him that kind of power over her again. It made her feel helpless to follow her own will. It made her hungry to taste him. It made her willing to risk everything. Almost...
Forcing herself to take another slow step backwards, she banked her confused emotions as best she could and reached down deep for reason. ‘Be serious, Nadir. A child will completely cramp your lifestyle. They’re inconvenient and messy and exhausting and...and...’ Wonderful and joyous and funny and loving... She swallowed. ‘And smelly. Really smelly at times.’
Nadir paced away from her and then turned sharply on his heel. ‘I don’t understand you. Most women would be jumping for joy at the prospect of having a rich man take care of her and her child.’
‘Except I’m not most women and I know this is a mistake. My parents married because my mother was pregnant with me and it was a miserable affair for everyone. They stayed together even though my father was seeing another woman because my mother believed a child should be raised by two parents. My father resented being tied to us and after a while I stopped wishing he would pay me attention.’
‘I won’t resent you.’
Embarrassed at having revealed her deepest wounds to him, Imogen scoffed. ‘How can you say that? You have a reputation of being the unobtainable playboy that spans continents.’
His lips thinned into a flat line. ‘People see what they want to see. But if you think love is some sort of guarantee of a happy union, it isn’t. My parents were the poster children for that particular misconception and they didn’t last.’
Imogen frowned. ‘I find that hard to believe if it was true love,’ she said huskily.
‘Believe it. They separated when my father took a second wife and—’
‘Took a second wife!’
‘Yes, it is the custom that men in Bakaan can take more than one wife.’
‘You can definitely forget marriage then.’
He smiled wearily. ‘Don’t worry. I am not a masochist.’
‘Is that supposed to be funny? I think it’s appalling that men are allowed to have more than one wife. I bet the women aren’t allowed more than one husband.’
‘No. And it bothered my mother just as much. In the end they hated each other so much there was never any joy in visiting either one of them. My mother was always trying to get us to prove our love by feeding her information about our father and our father was constantly derogatory about her and wanting to know what she was up to behind his back. It was as if they couldn’t let each other go and frankly it was exhausting.’
And no doubt emotionally crippling, Imogen thought. Which was so unlike the picture she had formed in her mind about his childhood. For some reason she had assumed that his life had been full of opulence and fun and the security of belonging to an ancient dynasty. It seemed she had been wrong. At least about the fun and security.
Curiosity made her pause and she wanted to ask him more but he got in first.
‘Forget it.’ His flinty gaze seemed to penetrate deep into her mind. ‘And forget shared custody, Imogen.’
At the reminder of their earlier argument Imogen’s spine straightened. ‘You’re impossible to reason with.’
‘That’s because you know I’m right.’
Shaking her head, she would have turned away from him then—anything to put some distance between herself and his half-naked body that seemed to beckon her to reach out and touch it—but his hands came down on her shoulders and held her immobile.
Imogen trembled and knew he felt it by the satisfied gleam that seemed to soften his gaze. ‘I’ve never stopped wanting you, Imogen, and that kiss back in my apartment proves we share an incredibly strong chemistry. Why fight it?’
Realising with a pang that she was held captive under his unwanted spell, Imogen wrenched herself out of his hold and swung away from him. Embarrassed at how easily she became enthralled by him, how easily she succumbed to his words, his touch, she let anger at him, at herself, at the whole world take hold. ‘You want to know why?’ She squared off in front of him. ‘Because, no matter what happens, I have no intention of marrying you and because, despite what you believe, a marriage based on sex will always be weak.’
‘Perhaps. But you’re a smart girl and you must realise that a marriage based on mutual chemistry and shared interests has strength.’
Imogen didn’t feel very smart right now. She felt wrung out and beaten. ‘And what do you think that we share, Nadir?’ she all but spat at him, desperate to lash out at him in any way that she could. Desperate to alleviate the giant ball of emotion welling up inside her and threatening to burst right out of her. ‘That could possibly hold a marriage between us together?’
She slapped her hands on her hips and waited for his response but she should have known that he’d have an answer poised on his lips that would floor her. She should have known that a man whose negotiation skills in the business world were second to none would have something up his sleeve to make her feel as big as a thimble.
‘Nadeena.’ He paused to let his words sink in. ‘We have Nadeena.’
