Читать книгу Bring Me Back - B A Paris - Страница 17

EIGHT

Before

The night you came back, I’d been at another party, half-heartedly pretending to enjoy myself. Harry had wanted me to go with him because he was fed up with me moping – as he called it – around the flat over you. I didn’t like being at odds with him so I’d agreed to go. But as I looked around me at the party that night, I felt like shooting myself.

Caroline was there. She kept throwing me glances while flirting with other men and I knew she was waiting for me to admit that I’d made a mistake in breaking things off with her. A sudden rush of loneliness made me wonder if I had, and I searched inside me for something which would tell me I should take her home with me. But although I tried, I couldn’t drum up the slightest bit of jealousy, or desire, so I left.

It was almost three in the morning when I walked back through St Katharine Docks. As I approached the flat, I saw someone huddled in the doorway of the building, sheltering from the cold. I didn’t realise it was you until you raised your head.

You were so cold you could barely stand. As I half-carried you into the entrance hall, I saw that your lips were blue. It took forever for the lift to arrive and while we waited, I thanked God that I hadn’t stayed at the party any longer. You won’t remember this but it took about an hour to get your body temperature back to normal. I wrapped you in a duvet, massaged your feet and hands to get the circulation going and gave you warm sweet tea to drink. It was as you were drinking it that you began to cry. I didn’t ask you any questions and you didn’t offer any explanation but I guessed it must have gone horribly wrong for you at the hostel. It was only later that you explained you hadn’t been able to find a job and that, a few days previously, all your money had been stolen while you slept.

I was going to put you in your old bed in the study, where you’d slept before, but I decided to leave you on the sofa because you were warm and comfortable there. I slipped a pair of my socks over your feet and tucked the duvet tightly around you. It felt so right looking after you; for the first time in weeks I felt I had a purpose. I told you to call me if you needed anything but as I left the room you called me back, and the sound of my name on your lips made my heart start beating faster because there was something in your voice that I’d never heard before; a sort of yearning, a longing, almost. I told myself that all you wanted was a glass of water but, your voice breaking, you asked me not to leave you. So I sat down on the sofa and wrapped my arms around you while you slept.