Читать книгу The Man Behind The Mask - Barbara Hannay - Страница 18

“FALL? ON MY watch? I don’t think so. Relax. Trust me.”

Nora giggled. Then relaxed, and then trusted him.

And at that exact second of giving her trust completely, his arm went behind the small of her back and she was literally swept off her feet.

Just like that she found her back arched, totally supported by his strength. Just like that they were in balance. In harmony. He held her suspended there. She gazed into his eyes. And then he pulled her in hard to his chest.

She leaned against him, feeling the steady, solid beat of his heart. They were both breathing hard, and she started to laugh. She laughed until the tears flowed.

“OhmyGod,” she said. “I haven’t laughed like that for so long!”

He was watching her intently, a little satisfied smile playing on his lips.

As if he had planned this. Give the poor beleaguered aunt a break from the monotony of her life.

It had been a nice thing to do.

But while she’d been losing control, he’d been gaining it.

And that was enough of that.

“Brendan, that was so much fun. I hardly know how to thank you.”

Except that she did. She knew only one way to bring him totally into this place of light with her.

And before she could stop herself or think of the consequences, letting the momentum of the dance carry her, she was on her tiptoes, taking his lips with hers. And that’s when the bottom really fell out of her world.

Brendan Grant’s lips were like silk warmed through with honey.

Nora considered herself something of an expert on energy, but nothing could have prepared her for this exchange.

His energy was pure and powerful.

It swept through her, until it felt as if every cell in her whole body was vibrating with welcome for what he was.

A life force. Compelling. All-encompassing.

And that was before his kiss deepened. Taking her. Capturing her. Promising her. Making her believe…

…in the breadth and depth and pure power of love.

She broke away and stood staring at him, her chest heaving, her mind whirling, her soul on fire.

She didn’t want to believe! Belief had left her shattered. Her belief in such things had left her weak and vulnerable and blind.

And she was doing it again.

Love! How could the word love have entered the picture? She hadn’t given it permission! She hadn’t invited it into her life! If anything, she was actively avoiding such a complicated twist to her already overwhelming life.

Realistically, she knew next to nothing about this man.

Except that he had known sorrow.

And that he was good to his deceased wife’s grandmother.

And had given her nephew a chance.

And could hold a bunny with tenderness.

And could turn an ordinary moment into a dance.

And had made her laugh.

And was afraid of crumbling along with the walls that came down.

The truth was that Nora felt she knew more about Brendan Grant in less than twenty-four hours than she had known about Dr. Vance Height in more than two years.

“I don’t know wh-what got into me,” she stammered, and could feel the heat moving up her cheeks. She had kissed a stranger. It didn’t matter that she felt she knew him. That was crazy. That was the illusion!

“I need to go. I need to go check on Luke. And Charlie. And your grandmother. And—”

“Hey!” He stepped in close to her, touched her cheek, looked deep into her eyes. “Don’t make it more than it was. A spontaneous moment between a healthy man and a beautiful woman.”

She stared at him.

It was nothing to him. Well, of course! No matter what she read into it, they did not know each other. While she was falling in love, he was building his walls higher.

“I—I’m not beautiful,” she stammered. Of all the things she could have said, why that?

“Yes,” he said, his voice husky, his thumb moving down her cheek and scraping delicately over her lip. “Yes, you are.”

Because she had needed to hear that. Had needed someone to see the woman in her.

And for a moment she thought he was going to kiss her again. And she knew, despite her attempt at resolve, she would not do a single thing—not one single thing—to stop him.

But then he stepped back from her, shoved his hands into his pockets.

“How about if I start on the chores? While I wait for Deedee?”

Pride and a need for self-protection made Nora want to refuse. But if she said no, he would know that something he had dismissed as nothing had shaken her right to her core.

And practicality took over. As he had pointed out, her volunteers were largely little old ladies. Here was someone who could do the heavy work. She couldn’t turn it down.

“Do you think I could get you to move some hay bales?”

“Sure, just show me what you need done.”

Trying to shake off that awareness of him—a need that he had unleashed within her and that she intended to fight with her whole heart—Nora led him through the small-animal section.

She was going to pretend nothing had happened.

But it was harder, as she watched him walk through her world with easy familiarity, pausing to scratch a cat’s ear, to stick his finger through mesh to tickle a kitten. Even the hamsters seemed to recognize him, and scurried to the wire to say hello.

They stopped in front of the colorful parrot, which at once swore loudly at Nora, using a term so derogatory to females it made her flush. Then the parrot switched to French.

Brendan’s lips twitched. His voice stern, he said, “Lafayette, fermez la bouche.”

“Ooh,” she teased, unable to resist, even though she knew the dangers of teasing, “you speak French. What did you say?”

“Romantic gibberish,” he said, wagging a fiendish eyebrow at her. “It means shut your mouth.”

And the tension that had been building between them since their lips met exploded into laughter once again.

“What do you do with animals like Lafayette?” he asked when the laughter stopped. “The ones that won’t be adopted for whatever reason?”

“I’m pretty new at this. I’ve only had the shelter open for six months. Demand for adoptable pets has outstripped animals coming in. I even found a home for a white rat! So far, that’s a decision I haven’t had to make.”

“Maybe you should have a plan,” he suggested.

She decided it would make her feel way too vulnerable to let him know how she dreaded the day she would have to make that decision, let alone plan for it.

They continued through the barn, and the dogs went crazy when they saw Brendan. With easy confidence, he moved into each pen and opened the door out to the run.

There were three dogs in residence, a black Lab with only three legs, which had been found out wandering. The cocker spaniel, Millie, had been brought in because her owner couldn’t afford the diabetes medication. The puppy was of an unknown breed. A week ago he’d been a matted and flea-infested mess, wary of people. Now he gamboled after Brendan.

“I don’t suppose you want to take one home?” Nora asked ruefully. “The dog with three legs?”

“You had me pegged right as a guy who wouldn’t even have a plant.”

It was a warning to her, whether he knew it or not.

Not a man to pin any kind of romantic dream on.

But she already knew that. She was so done with romantic dreams. Though there was something about being dipped over a man’s arm that could breathe them back to life in anyone, even a more hardened soul than her.

And there was something about seeing him with animals that told the truth about who and what he was, even if he didn’t know that himself.

“You’ll have no trouble finding a home for this little guy,” he said of the enthusiastic puppy. “I’m not so sure about Long John Silver over there. Really, you should have a plan.”

“I don’t want a plan!” she said. “What? After six months get rid of him? How could I walk by that cage every day if time was counting down?”

“That sounds a bit like attachment to me.”

“Well, it isn’t!”

It felt so much more powerful to be annoyed with him than it had felt being in his arms.

Finally, they arrived at a large stack of hay, and without being told, Brendan got a wheelbarrow and began to pull bales down. Nora went back to cleaning cages, putting in food and changing water.

Her annoyance, unfortunately, could not be sustained in light of how hard he was working for her. The awareness was roaring in her ears, sizzling through her veins. She could not help sneaking peeks at him. There was a certain poetry to a male body hard at work, and she was sworn off romance, not dead! Still, these kind of temptations—dancing, laughing, watching him pull eighty-pound bales down and shift them effortlessly to the wheelbarrow—were going to chip away at her resolve.

Thankfully, her cell phone buzzed, and when she took the call there was a rescue she needed to go to. That was going to do double duty by rescuing her from the tingles on her skin and on her lips.

“Gotta go,” she said, her tone deliberately breezy. “Iguana found on the loose in Hansen Lakeside Park.” She ordered herself to thank him, and then to tell him not to come back. Diplomatically, of course. Nothing here that Luke and I can’t handle, especially now that school is out for the summer.

But, weakling that she was, she found herself looking at Brendan’s lips. She decided she needed to think about it before doing something rash and irrevocable.

Which probably described her decision to kiss Brendan Grant! Rash and irrevocable. Everything she did around him, from here on out, had to be measured and thought out carefully.

Everything she did around him now? From here on out? Hmm, not exactly the thoughts of a woman who was going to look at a man and tell him never to come back!

Three days later, Nora was scowling at her computer screen. Iguanas did eat dark, leafy greens. Except not the one she had. He was probably ill, and his owner had not been able to afford the vet bills. She made a note to pack up the iguana to take to her appointment with Dr. Bentley this afternoon. The vet was good enough to donate a few minutes to the animal shelter one day every week, and could also be counted on for emergencies.

She was aware that even as she did these routine tasks, her mind was not on them.

It was on Brendan Grant. He had brought his grandmother out every day for a few minutes, quite early in the morning, before he had to be at the office.

Nora couldn’t very well tell him to stay away when Deedee wanted to see Charlie, refused to take him home, and couldn’t drive herself.

Without being asked, without checking in, Brendan headed for the barn, and every morning after he left, Nora went out to see all the bales moved, the horse pen cleaned, the large bags of dog food organized, the aisle swept.

He didn’t come to the house.

And she didn’t go out. In fact, knowing now what time he came, she would sometimes scurry for cover just as he was pulling into the driveway.

Though it felt as if she was fighting her inner demons. That spontaneous dance haunted her. As did the laughter. And his lips on hers. He was out there right now. She could just go down…

She heard the front door open, flicked her curtain back. She saw Deedee making her slow way back to the car, Luke holding her arm and helping her in. Brendan was nowhere in sight, but if she waited just a minute, Nora knew that he would be.

Then Luke came back in the house, and she heard him taking the stairs two at a time. She quickly flicked the curtain down and stared at her computer screen.

He stopped off in his room, and when he came up behind her a minute later, Charlie was drooping over Luke’s crossed arms as if doing an impression of a leopard in a tree.

“Do the animals ever talk to you?” her nephew asked in a troubled voice, scratching Charlie’s ears. “I mean, not in words, but you get, like, a feeling from them and know exactly what they’re thinking?”

“Give me an example.”

He took a deep breath. “Charlie is ready to go. He’s tired. And he hurts. And he’s a cat. Cats are clean. He doesn’t want to be losing control of himself, if you know what I mean. You know why he’s staying?”

She shook her head.

“Because he loves her. Deedee. And she’s not ready to let him go.”

In the past few days it was becoming apparent to Nora that Luke shared her gift, only his was a more intense version. Were animals really talking to him? Or was it just one more example of how her crazy decisions were affecting him?

Karen would not have approved of Luke being certain he knew what animals were thinking! She had certainly never approved of Nora’s abilities.

“Remember Mr. Grant said I had to make a mend?”

Nora nodded, not correcting him that it was “amends.”

“That’s how I’m going to do it. By getting her ready.”

“How are you going to do that?”

“I don’t know. But she thinks it’s by mowing her lawn. I’m going to bring Ranger with me.”

Nora gazed at her nephew, and he had a look of resolve on his face. Not like a boy, but a man.

For the first time in a long, long time, Nora didn’t feel worried, even though to someone looking in it might seem as if she should.

Luke was communicating with animals! Or thought he was. That probably needed a psychiatrist, not what she was feeling.

He was taking on the gargantuan task of getting Deedee ready to lose her pet. It was a failure getting ready to happen.

Protect him.

But this was probably why her sister had wanted her and Vance as Luke’s guardians. Because Nora felt proud of him for taking on the impossible. And as if there was a slim hope, after all, that her nephew was going to leave the world better than he found it.

Somehow the changes in Luke and her own feeling of optimism seemed linked, not to the wonderful summer weather they were suddenly enjoying, but to this man who was in her life while not being in it.

It was all beginning to feel like the scariest thing that had ever happened to her. In that nice scary way like anticipating someone jumping out from behind a bush at you on Halloween, or riding the biggest roller coaster at the amusement park.

Luke went to the window. “Brendan’s coming up from the barn now. I’ll catch a ride with him into town and mow Deedee’s grass.”

Nora wanted to scream no, the very same way she wanted to scream no as the roller coaster was inching up that final climb. But just like then, it felt as if it was already too late. She could see all their lives getting more and more tangled together.

Besides, when she looked at the simple bravery revealed in her nephew’s face, Nora knew she had to be as brave as he was.

She joined him at the window and saw Brendan striding across her yard.

“He must change for work later,” she said out loud, admiring the way faded jeans clung to his legs, to the leanness of his hips. A plaid shirt was tucked into his belt, but open at the throat. Her eyes skittered to the firm line of Brendan’s lips.

She had to be brave. Whether she wanted to be or not.

“It’s Saturday,” Luke chided her.

“Oh. Now that you’re on summer holidays, I forget sometimes.”

“That’s my flaky aunt. Who doesn’t know what day it is?” But he said it with gruff affection, then added, “Gotta go. I’ll call you later.”

Luke put his hand on her shoulder, dropped a casual kiss on her cheek. He squinted at the computer screen.

“It’s not because we’re giving him the wrong diet. Iggy ate something,” he said.

“Iggy? Luke, we try not to name the animals.”

“It’s not really a name, just short for iguana. Dr. Bentley’s going to have to x-ray him. How could an iguana swallow a house?”

And on that note, her nephew was gone, Ranger peeking out his hoodie pocket. He went back outside, and moments later, she heard him calling, “Brendan? I’ll come with you. I’m going to mow Deedee’s lawn. That’s if Deedee can look after my kitten.”

Nora twitched back the curtain just in time to see Luke hand Ranger to Deedee.

The old woman stared at the kitten. For a moment, she looked mad, as if she might give it back. But then her face softened, and she tucked Ranger into her breast and got into the car.

Brendan looked up at her, as if he’d known she was watching all along. He gave her a small smile and a thumbs-up. As if they were raising this boy together. She let the curtain fall back into place.