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Foreword

By Alexandra Franzen

Founder/Editor, the Tiny Press Author,

You’re Going to Survive and The Checklist Book

As a writer, I spend a great deal of time Googling all kinds of random, interesting topics—going down hundreds of spiraling internet rabbit-holes.

Occasionally, I stumble across a piece of information that leaves a permanent, forever-and-ever impression on my mind. After discovering this new piece of info, I perceive the world—and myself—differently.

Here’s one of those.

Years ago, I came across a research study from a top university—a study about men, women, and confidence.

The premise was very simple.

First, the researchers divided their test subjects into two groups: male and female.

Everyone was given a fairly simple math test. Ten questions to complete.

After the test—before revealing the scores—the researchers asked the men, “So, how did it go? How well do you think you did on that test?” Generally, the men were quite confident about their scores. On average, the men replied, “Pretty good. I think I got about 8 or 9 out of 10 questions correct.”

The women got asked the same question. On average, the women replied, “Oof, yikes, not so good. I think I got maybe 5 or 6 out of 10 questions correct.”

Then the researchers revealed the actual scores. Turns out, everyone—male and female—performed about the same. The average test score was around 7 out of 10, regardless of gender.

Moral of the story: Often (not always, of course, there are exceptions to every rule…but often!) men tend to slightly overestimate their abilities (“I’m gonna do great!” “I’ve got this!” “I’m going for it!” “I’m a great candidate for this position!”), whereas women tend to slightly underestimate their abilities (“I don’t think I’m qualified,” “Why would they choose me?” “I’m not ready.”)

What does this mean?

It means that, as a woman, you are actually more awesome than you think.

It’s just that your tricky, annoying brain tries to convince you that you’re not.

This pattern is prevalent in our world—not just with math tests, but in all realms of life.

Say, applying for a job. Studies on job-hunting show that women typically won’t apply unless they meet close to 100 percent of the job criteria listed by the employer, whereas men will apply even if they meet far less than that.

Same with money. Surveys show that women are more reluctant to invest their money because they figure they won’t be good at it, but then once they do, they tend to outperform male investors by .4 to 1.2 percent. (And when you’re investing thousands, that slight percentage really adds up!)

Across the board, in so many areas of life, women tend to doubt their abilities more than men do, even when both are equally qualified. (And, even when women are more qualified!)

Google: “gender confidence gap” to read tons of fascinating articles on this topic.

To close this frustrating confidence gap, we need to re-train our brains. We need to release old beliefs and build new, better ones. This book can help with that.

Keep this book on your desk or bedside table. Open it often. Flip to a fresh page and read a few paragraphs or an inspirational quote. Let the words sink in. Let this book remind you, daily, that you are smarter, more capable, more creative, and more competent than you initially think.

Keep reminding yourself of this, daily. Remind your daughters, nieces, aunties, and girlfriends, too. Whenever you hear a woman doubting herself—“Can I really do this? Should I? Who cares what I have to say? I dunno, other people could probably do this better. I’m not strong enough. I don’t have enough willpower. I don’t think it’s realistic…”—look her in the eyes and say, “Yes, you can. You are more prepared, more ready, and more qualified than you think. Go for it. Because you’re awesome.”

It’s true. She is.

And you are, too.

Just like the title of this beautiful book affirms:

You are an awesome woman.

Even more awesome than you might realize. And lightyears beyond.

Alexandra Franzen

October 29, 2019

Hilo, Hawaii