Читать книгу The Rancher's Secret Son - Betsy St. Amant - Страница 13

Chapter Four

Emma swung on her mom’s front porch swing the next afternoon, her bare feet pushing off the wooden deck. Clanging dishes sounded through the screen door, where her mother was cleaning up from lunch, erasing all evidence of their chicken salad sandwiches. She’d offered to help, but Mom insisted Emma stay outside and enjoy the afternoon.

Sort of how she’d insisted she do the laundry that morning without help. And cleaned the kitchen last night after their snack without help.

Day two, and already Emma wondered if her welcome was fading. That was her mom, though, especially since she became a widow—routine, routine, routine. And Emma wasn’t fitting inside it. Maybe that answered her question about Thanksgiving.

She sighed. Could they really make this last a month without driving each other crazy? They had a temporary routine figured out when Mom visited them in Dallas. Everyone had their own room, their own space. They kept a busy schedule so they wouldn’t be on top of each other all day. Home, however, was a different story.

Did she really just think of Broken Bend as home?

She didn’t want to go there.

Emma tilted her face to the sunlight streaming across her lap and released a deep breath, trying to erase the tension of the past forty-eight-plus hours. The verdict at court. Seeing Max, leaving Cody. The secrets, the burden. She still had to figure out what to tell Max, and when.

Later looked pretty appealing.

She closed her eyes, letting the warmth of the October afternoon sink into her skin. This entire situation left a bad taste in her mouth, and it had nothing to do with the fact her mom had used a little too much mayo in the salad. Her past had caught up to her—and not only caught up, but taken over. She had to deal with it. But what was best for Cody right now?

Tires crunched gravel and she opened her eyes to see a red, extended cab truck pulling into the drive. She squinted at the driver, drenched in shadows as he exited the vehicle. Surely her mother didn’t have male visitors... No.

It was Max.

They really had to stop meeting like this.

“What’d he do?” The question sprang from her lips and carried across the yard before she realized how heavy it sounded. Heavy with fear, with accusation. With expectation of failure. How ugly of her. She swallowed the rest of it, clamping her teeth on her lower lip. Max being here didn’t automatically mean bad news.

But it probably didn’t mean good.

“Hey.” Max took the steps in a single hop and came to face her, pausing to remove his hat. His brown hair wilted across his forehead and he shoved it back before replacing what she always thought of as his natural appendage. Max always had two arms, two legs and a hat. Some things never changed.

And some things did.

“Did something happen?” She crossed her arms over her chest, willing away the heartbroken girl from thirteen years ago that rose inside, urging her to run to the safety of her room and lock the door. Shut him out. Convince herself she hadn’t made a mistake and wasn’t making another one by trusting her son to Max’s supposed expertise.

But the professional adult stood her ground and forced what she hoped was a natural-looking smile. At least forming her fears as a generic question made them sound more approachable. Less assuming.

“Happen to who? Cody?” Surprise lifted Max’s brows. He shook his head, and relief melted her from the inside out. If Cody got kicked out of the program...

“Sorry. I didn’t think how my showing up would seem.” He did look sorry as he adjusted his hat for the second time. Worry wrinkled the skin above his nose, and his smile faded to a half quirk. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“It’s okay, I wasn’t scared.” Terrified was more like it. The adrenaline abandoned her limbs, and she sank back on the porch swing. “Just concerned.”

“Cody’s fine. Doing great.” Max edged closer to the swing, though he chose to lean against the porch rail instead of join her. Which was as he should. She wouldn’t remember the times they’d sat on that same swing well after midnight, while her parents were asleep, and laughed. Whispered. Kissed.

Wouldn’t remember that at all.

“We took a trail ride this morning, and now the campers are having a rest time in their room before we introduce them to barn chores.” Max shook his head, as if he realized he’d been stalling. “That’s not why I came, though, obviously. I had a question, and it wasn’t one to ask on the phone.”

Nerves twisted her stomach, and she gripped the rusty chain of the swing. Surely he hadn’t come for her. To talk about the past. What if he’d somehow noticed how similar he and Cody—

“I need help.”

The blatant admission took her off guard, and she snapped her gaze to meet his. “With what?” Max Ringgold never needed anyone. Except maybe his dealer, back in the day. He’d made that clear more than once. He didn’t need family. God. Her.

Maybe some things had changed since then, but how much could a person really transform?

He tucked his thumbs in the front pockets of his jeans, another signature Max move that threatened to sweep her back in time. She kept her gaze riveted to his, determined to ignore the memories desperate for review. She was here for Cody. Her son. Not for some traumatic, tormenting stroll down best-left-forgotten lane.

She straightened slightly, steeling herself for his request. Whatever it was, she had no obligation to answer. He would treat Cody—and her—like any other camper or parent on the ranch. Just because they had a past didn’t mean she owed him a thing.

“My lead female counselor went into early labor.”

Well that wasn’t what she expected. She frowned.

“Nicole will obviously be gone the rest of the camp, whether she has the baby early or not. And that leaves me shorthanded with the men, but completely—well, unhanded I guess you’d say—for the girls.” Max let out a slow breath. “So, I was thinking...with your degree, and all, with counseling, you said...that...”

Oh, no. No. She knew what he wanted now, despite the fact he didn’t seem able to get the words out. And with good reason. Of course she’d say no.

“No.”

He didn’t seem to hear, just took the spot next to her on the swing. She shifted automatically, hating the alertness that rushed her senses at his proximity. If she’d heeded those warning signs thirteen years ago...but no. Cody wasn’t a burden. He was a gift. Even now, through this struggle. He was the best part of her life.

And the most painful.

“Emma, there’s no one else.”

“In this entire world?” She was exaggerating, a telltale sign of panic and loss of control, but she couldn’t help it. She couldn’t do this. Not for myriad reasons, namely her secret. Even now she felt it bubbling within, churning her insides like a cauldron of lies. But it wasn’t her fault. She’d done what was best for her son. Mothers protected their children.

Even from cowboys.

“Well, sure, there’s probably someone even right here in Broken Bend, but not right now. Not qualified. Not sitting on their mother’s porch with nothing to do for a month.” He gestured to the house, and suddenly she was embarrassed over its chipped, faded condition. What was wrong with her, still caring what Max Ringgold thought all this time later? “The girls at the camp need someone they can talk to. I don’t just need a chaperone in the dorms at night or another body on the trail rides. I need someone I can trust with them.”

“Trust me? I’m the mother of one of your campers.” And you’re the father. The words practically burned her lips. “No. You don’t want me.”

Not the words she meant to use. Her cheeks flushed, and she looked away, across the yard, staring at his red truck until her vision blurred. “I mean, I’m clearly not much help.”

“You’re still a professional.” Max pushed the swing off with his boots, and the gentle breeze stirred by the sudden motion cooled her heated face. “I’m sure it’s different when it’s your own child acting out, anyway. Hasn’t someone told you that?”

Of course they had—everyone in her clinic had for that matter—but that didn’t mean she believed them. Or that they were right. She shook her head. “What about Cody? I don’t need to be there, cramping his style or getting in his way. He has to come first.”

“The boys and girls typically keep separate schedules, besides mealtimes. I’ll make sure he doesn’t see you more than necessary.” Max’s eyes tried to draw her in, and she pointedly looked away, though there was no avoiding the familiar scent of his cologne. “He’ll know you’re there, of course—I won’t lie to him. But it won’t be a problem.”

It was actually starting to make sense. That was the scary part. Emma shook her head again, though she didn’t know why. She couldn’t actually do this. But hadn’t she just been wondering how she and her mother would make it through the month? Still, awkwardness for a few weeks was a thousand times better than keeping her mouth shut around Max for that long.

“Please, Emma. You’re here. You’re available.” He paused, and she risked a glance. He was frowning as if hit with a sudden thought. “You are available. Aren’t you?”

Now. Here it was—her out. But no, she was completely, totally available. With zero reason to turn this opportunity down other than the one reason she couldn’t reveal. Her secret. Hadn’t she chosen this profession to help others? What would happen if she turned her back—would Max have to send the female campers home? Then what—juvie? Jail? Probation? House arrest? They deserved more than those options.

Because Cody deserved more than those options.

She pressed her lips together, unable to believe she was even considering this. “You can’t pay me. It’d seem unethical given my relationship to an existing camper.”

Max held up both hands in surrender, grinning as if he knew he had her. But then again, he’d always known. That was the problem. “Not an issue there, trust me. The extended staff is volunteer, anyway.”

Volunteer. Right. Volunteer to put herself in Max’s presence every day, ministering to kids she wasn’t worthy of teaching. Qualified, sure—but not worthy. Not with her own failures slapping her in the face every time the police showed up with Cody. Every time the phone rang with another telling of his misadventures. Every time he smarted off to her and snuck out of the house.

But if she didn’t offer what little she had, who would? Were the girls better off without her? She thought back to the list of “or else” options the judge had provided Cody and shook her head. No, she was the lesser of those evils for sure. Everyone deserved a second chance.

“So? What do you think?”

Well, maybe not everyone. She darted a glance at Max, at his hopeful mask permanently pressed in place, then at her mother’s silhouette in the kitchen, obviously listening to their every word. She pressed her lips together to hold in her sigh and nodded before she could talk herself out of it. “I’m available. I’ll do it.”

She might be available. But when it came to Max Ringgold, her heart was one hundred percent obligated elsewhere.

* * *

That hadn’t been as hard as he thought. Well, in some ways, maybe harder.

Max drove slowly away from Emma, refusing the urge to stare in his rearview mirror at her reflection still settled on the porch. Sitting next to Emma on the swing had been a blast from his past he’d never dreamed of reliving. Well, he’d dreamt of it all right—memories that refused to die, visiting him in his sleep—but he never imagined he’d actually be there again in person.

Though this time she’d squeezed as far away from him as possible. Definitely not like the last time they’d swung on her parents’ front porch, late at night while her parents slept, Emma tucked under his arm so closely that he barely had to move his head to plant a kiss on her strawberry-scented hair.

Max tightened his grip on the steering wheel. Those days were gone. Emma had obviously moved on since then, having a kid with someone who apparently wasn’t in the picture anymore. That was too bad for Cody, though he had to admit—deep down, he was a little relieved Emma was single. Clearly she’d been with another man at some point in her life, but at least he didn’t have to see the guy who’d stolen the only woman he’d ever loved.

But now he had to see her every day for a month.

He pulled back into the ranch drive a few minutes later and stopped to send a few quick text messages to his team members about the temporary change in staff. Thankfully Faith, his part-time worker, had agreed to stay the night instead of leaving after dinner as was her usual routine. She could supervise the girl campers until Emma arrived the next day.

Less than twenty-four hours.

He hit Send on a group text and tossed his phone on the seat beside him, pausing to take a deep breath and focus. Reset his mind away from Emma and back on his duties. Rest period would be about over by now, so it’d be time to introduce the kids to barn chores. Some of the teens would have never held a pitchfork in their life—never lifted so much as a finger, for that matter, toward real labor. Other kids in this camp probably had worked so hard as children because of their family’s financial circumstances, they’d been worn down and burned-out by age fourteen or fifteen. There were always different reasons for the rebel heart.

For him, it’d been a matter of history repeating itself.

He slammed the truck door shut just as Brady rode up the drive on his favorite horse, Nugget. Oh, man, Brady would have a time of it hearing Emma was back in town. After all the teasing he’d doled out to Brady a few years ago about his wife, Caley, when they were dating, Max would be in for an earful. He’d wait a bit, make sure the timing was right before telling him—and make sure Cody wasn’t nearby. The last thing the kid needed was to discover his temporary guardian had a history with his mom.

This was getting a little more complicated than he’d realized. No wonder Emma had been so hesitant to take the job. Still, it had to be done.

A quick glance confirmed the ranch was quiet, the barn not yet teeming with the afternoon activities. He probably only had a few minutes before the counselors rounded up the teens and brought them out.

Max squinted up at Brady against the afternoon sun, grinning as Nugget stomped and snorted beneath his friend. “Cut it out, Nugget. You’re not so tough.” He reached up and rubbed the horse under his mane. “I’ve seen you run away from a bull.”

Brady swung easily from the saddle, the leather creaking beneath his displaced weight. “Yeah, I saw it a little too closely. From the ground up.”

“Not that you’re holding a grudge against me for being gone that time Spitfire got out or anything.” He crossed his arms and attempted a stern expression, but it was hard not to laugh at the story that never got old—Brady being chased across his pasture by an ornery bull who’d escaped his pen a few years ago.

“Actually, no. Not bitter at all.” Brady gathered Nugget’s reins over his head and looped them in his fist. “That was one of the things that brought me and Caley together.”

Max grinned. “Then you’re welcome.”

Brady shoved Max’s shoulder, and he laughed as they led Nugget toward the barn. “What brings you by, besides boasting about your marital bliss?”

“Not boasting. Just appreciating.” Brady tugged at Nugget’s reins to prevent him from nibbling the grass near the red structure. “Though I do hate to admit when you’re right.”

“Get used to it, pal.” Despite all his teasing along the way, Max had encouraged Brady, a former widower, to act on his feelings toward Caley when she’d worked as his daughter’s nanny. “Caley still volunteering at the fire department?”

Brady nodded. “Only when they get overworked, or when there’s a big fire.”

“So only during the times it would make you the most nervous.”

His friend rolled his eyes with a groan. “Pretty much. But it’s working out. She’s good at what she does.”

“No doubt.” Max looked again toward the dorms, halfway eager to tell Brady what had transpired in the past two days, and halfway dreading it. Though he’d never met her, Brady knew the whole story about Emma—the whirlwind relationship, the way Max fell faster than a steer during a team roping competition. Her desertion. If anyone would “get it,” it’d be his friend.

But admitting he was still so affected by her didn’t come naturally.

“I actually came to borrow your wire puller.” Brady gestured toward the general direction of his property. “Have a fence to repair and Ava broke mine last time I let her help.” He cut his eyes at Max. “And trust me, I say help lightly.”

Max snorted. But Brady was letting his young teen daughter, who he’d kept on a tight leash since her mother’s death years ago, spread her wings on the ranch, and for Brady, that was huge. Another hats off to Caley there. “Sure, no problem. It’s in the barn.” Finding the puller would give him more time to decide how to break the news of Emma’s return—and that she had a son—to his friend.

And time to figure out how to say it in a way that wouldn’t put Brady on the alert to Max’s not-so-dormant feelings for her.

Brady tied Nugget’s reins to the hitching post and Max led the way inside, blinking to adjust his eyes to the dimmer light. He opened the supply room door. “Here it is.” The wire puller lay on the top shelf, just where it should be. He never imagined in his years of working for Brady that one day he’d have his own spread—and that it would be organized, no less.

“Top shelf. I trained you well.” Brady helped himself to the tool and stepped back, grinning as he shut the door. “Seriously man, this is awesome what you’ve got going here. As much as I hated to lose your help at the Double C, you’ve done well.”

“You gonna need a tissue?” Max joked, but the compliment sank in deep. Praise from Brady always meant a lot. They’d seen each other through some rough times.

Hopefully that wasn’t an omen of what was coming along with Emma.

Brady clapped his shoulder as he passed him in the aisle. “Maybe marriage made me a little soft, but whatever. I still recommend it.”

“I hear you.” They walked in silence back toward Nugget. Max was running out of time to talk before the teens descended on the barn. It was now or never. He drew a deep breath, fighting to keep his voice casual. “So, turns out Nicole went into labor a little early. Guess who’s filling in with the female campers?” Not that Brady could ever actually guess.

“Someone from church?” Brady turned at Nugget’s side and handed Max the wire puller so he could mount.

“Not exactly.” He hesitated. “Someone who recently came back to town.”

Brady’s brows lifted. “I’d guess one of your exes, but there’s too many to keep up with all their geographical locations.”

Max passed the puller to Brady in the saddle. “Ha-ha-ha, very funny.” Yet true. So what if Max had dated a lot—or more than a lot—back in the day? Including the local veterinarian, which hadn’t gone over well with Brady when Max had been in his employ. It didn’t matter—he wasn’t like that now, despite his former reputation. Besides, all those women had just proved one fact to him over and over again.

They weren’t Emma Shaver.

“So it’s not an ex.” Brady gathered the reins and turned Nugget toward the road.

Max rolled in his bottom lip, stepping back to give the horse room. “I didn’t say that.”

“I really need to get this fence repaired, man. What’s with the guessing game?” Brady shifted his hat back on his head as he peered down at Max. Nugget snorted his own impatience, and Brady’s eyes slowly narrowed. “Unless it’s—”

Gravel crunched as an SUV parked a few yards from where they stood. Brady’s head swiveled to look just as Max recognized the vehicle. Emma was early. They’d agreed for her to show up first thing the next morning, Wednesday, yet here she was. And from the way she grudgingly heaved her suitcase from the backseat and blew her hair out of her eyes, she was tired. Maybe even grumpy.

This wasn’t good. He hadn’t had a chance to talk to Cody or do more than text the other counselors the news of the fill-in help. Hadn’t had a chance to tell Brady the turn of events.

Hadn’t had a chance to wall up what was left of his heart.

“I’m here.” Emma set her wheeled suitcase on the dusty ground at her feet, looking as if she thought simply being there would have to be enough. Good thing Max had turned off the idea of more a long time ago. Somewhere around the time she disappeared from his life, maybe. But no, it’d taken a lot longer than that.

Still was taking time, if he were painfully honest.

He shot a glance at Brady and let out a long sigh. The inevitable had arrived, right on time. “Welcome back.” He focused his smile on Emma, hoping he successfully hid the nerves wringing his stomach. “This is Brady, a neighbor and friend. And, Brady, this is the temporary counselor I was telling you about—Emma.” He swallowed, darting a glance as Brady automatically reached down a hand to shake hers. “Emma Shaver.”