Читать книгу You Know You've Been in Japan too Long... - Bill Mutranowski - Страница 6

Having a little trouble pronouncing those Rs and Ls? Is your speech devoid of idioms, slang and words longer than five letters? Are you losing it linguistically? Well, you could find an English conversation teacher and take a little refresher course. What's that you say? You are an English conversation teacher?

Ahh... laid back, mellow, stop-and-smell-the-roses of Tokyo. In your dreams! Not only is it one of the most densely populated cities on Earth, people there always seem to be in a hurry and busy with something or other. The pace slows down a bit on weekends, though—when the trains come 6 minutes, 17 seconds apart.

Ittai is Japanese for "ouch," and otto translates as "oops." But how to say yoisho in English? In the U.S.A., where obesity is practically the national pastime, it would have to be something like "grunt," immediately followed by "groan... creak... pop" and finally, "call 911! "

Strikes, pickets and other such public demonstrations are pretty rare in Japan. It's not that everybody's happy about the way things are; they just think confrontation is something to be avoided. You know, the group harmony thing. It adds ups to a stable, well-ordered and politically inert society. So go ahead and have your sit-in. Just don't expect anyone to join you.

Native English-speaking newcomers to Japan can get in a tizzy about how their mother tongue is twisted beyond recognition. There are cryptic English song lyrics, meaningless English ad slogans, hilarious English signs and incomprehensible English instructional manuals. But you've gotta admit that anything makes more sense than nihongo.

Nature in Japan is great, if you can find some. That's not to say it doesn't exist. You'll just have to put some distance between yourself and the densely populated mega-cities of Tokyo and Osaka first. Meanwhile, don't expect to frolic barefoot through the grass at a nearby park during your lunch break. But you can always park yourself in the shade of a vending machine.

The pace in Japan can be downright frenetic. But those escalators are like speed bumps. Curious, the way some people just stand there, when mere moments before they were meteors hurtling through space. But hey, go with the flow. So you'll be a little late for your aerobics class. It's better than the stairs, right?