Читать книгу A Maverick under the Mistletoe - Brenda Harlen - Страница 12

Chapter Three

Sutter said goodbye to Collin and Willa and headed back to the Triple T. He bypassed the main house and went directly to Clayton’s residence on the property. Since Clay had moved to Thunder Canyon, his place had become a guest house for visitors, and although Sutter wasn’t technically a guest, he felt more comfortable there than in the main house.

Mostly he appreciated the privacy and the solitude, and he was grateful for both tonight. He didn’t feel like making idle conversation with anyone, especially not his well-meaning but undeniably interfering mother, and especially not if she’d somehow gotten wind of the fact that Paige had been present at the town hall debate.

Ellie had always liked Paige, and despite the breakup with Sutter she hadn’t yet given up hope that they might somehow find their way back to one another. So she made a point of keeping him apprised of what was going on in Paige’s life—including the fact that she was dating the mill foreman.

Sutter knew that the information hadn’t been intended to hurt him but to spur him into action, his mother expecting that he would charge into town and sweep Paige off her feet and into his arms again. Even if he’d thought such a grand gesture might be successful, Sutter knew that he had no right to interfere in her life now. Five years earlier, they’d made their own choices and gone their separate ways.

And now she was dating Alex Monroe.

That fact was more difficult to accept than he wanted to acknowledge. He didn’t know Alex well, but he knew who he was and he had nothing against the guy. He just didn’t like the idea of Paige with anyone else.

Which was admittedly hypocritical considering that he’d hardly lived like a monk in the five years since he’d left Rust Creek Falls. But the truth was, he hadn’t been with anyone since Paige who had made him forget about her.

He’d fallen in love with her when he was barely seventeen, and with the innocence and conviction of youth, he’d been absolutely certain that he would love her forever. They’d talked about their future together, when they would get married, where they would live, how many children they wanted. And he’d believed that she loved him, too—right up until the moment she’d told him she couldn’t marry him.

Even five years later, the memory of that impulsive and rejected proposal stung. Because even now he knew he wasn’t completely over his feelings for Paige, while she seemed to have moved on without so much as a backward glance in his direction.

The fact that she’d bought a house proved to him that she still wanted most of the same things they’d talked about. That she hadn’t let him get past the front door proved that he wasn’t a factor in any of her plans.

Which, of course, made him wonder if Alex Monroe was. Had she invited him in for coffee? Had he been given a tour of Paige’s house? Had he seen her bedroom? Spent the night in her bed?

Sutter scowled, acknowledging that those were questions he probably didn’t want to know the answers to—even the speculation was making him crazy.

He deliberately turned his thoughts to why she’d moved out of her parents’ house. Maybe she’d wanted to be closer to her job, although a couple of blocks hardly made a difference. In a town like Rust Creek Falls, commuting times were never a concern.

More likely she’d wanted her own space, more independence. Paige had always been close to her family, but she’d often chafed at their rules and restrictions. It was a common complaint of many teenagers, but she was a grown woman now, an incredibly beautiful woman living alone in a house that was probably just waiting for the children she’d always wanted.

He poured himself a glass of whiskey and swallowed it in a single gulp. The liquor burned a path down his throat and into his belly, but it didn’t touch the aching emptiness in his heart. So he poured himself a second drink and was considering a third when he realized what he was doing. He pushed the bottle aside and headed to bed.

It had been a lot of years since he’d drunk himself into a stupor over a woman, and even that hadn’t helped him forget either the pain or the loneliness. Of course, it had been Paige then, too, and he wasn’t going to go down that path again.

It was a decision he found himself questioning later. If he’d consumed enough alcohol to pass out drunk, maybe he wouldn’t have been able to dream. Because when he finally did fall asleep, his dreams were filled with images of Paige, past and present. Memories mingled with fantasy in an enticing montage that teased and tormented him through the night.

When he finally woke the next morning with his heart pounding and the sheets twisted around his body, he actually ached for her.

* * *

Teaching wasn’t an easy job at the best of times, and these were definitely not the best of times. There was so much going on in the town, so many families who had been displaced and so many demands on Paige’s time and attention that she sometimes didn’t know which direction to turn. As if all of that wasn’t enough, Sutter Traub had planted himself in the middle of everything by getting involved with his brother’s mayoral campaign and churning up a lot of feelings she’d thought were long dead—or at least deeply buried.

She walked around the long table that had been set up in her living-room-turned-classroom to check on the mock campaign posters her students were creating. Early on in her teaching career, she’d realized that kids learned more easily and maintained information more readily when they could relate the lessons to real life, so she’d talked about the recent flood during a unit on environmental studies and had worked the upcoming election into their discussion about governments.

The latter had certainly given her some insights into the political leanings of many local families, and though the class seemed fairly evenly divided between “Team Crawford” and “Team Traub,” she was optimistic that Collin would emerge victorious. But right now she tried to focus her thoughts not on the upcoming election but on the current lesson.

She really did love her job and looked forward to the start of every day, approaching each subject with equal enthusiasm. She had her own personal favorites, of course, but she tried not to let that bias show. She wanted her students to experience and enjoy everything. She loved being able to open their minds, to encourage their curiosity and nurture their creativity, and gloried in each and every one of their successes. And because she was so completely engaged with her students, she hurt when they were hurting.

And she knew that Ryder Traub was hurting. Sutter had been right about the fact that Dallas’s eldest son was having a hard time adjusting to his mother’s abandonment. He wasn’t acting out, as was often the case with children going through difficult transitions. Instead, it was as if he’d drawn into himself, disengaging from the other students and the activities in the classroom. He wasn’t uncooperative—he always did the work that was required of him—but Paige could tell that he was just going through the motions.

She tried to draw him out, but that wasn’t an easy task when she had sixteen other students to attend to. Not that they all came to class every day, which was another reason teaching in her home was a challenge. It was as if the parents figured it wasn’t an actual school, therefore, she couldn’t actually be teaching. And that only made it harder to impress the importance of every lesson upon her students.

When the day was over and the last student had gone, she realized she needed more markers and stickers to replenish her cupboard. Sometimes she would go to the specialty classroom resource store in Kalispell, but for everyday supplies she could usually find what she needed at Crawford’s General Store.

Unfortunately, she sometimes found more than she wanted, as was the situation when she realized it was Nate Crawford behind the counter instead of his sister.

She forced a smile as she emptied her basket. “Where’s Nina?” She wasn’t just making conversation but was genuinely concerned about the woman, who was nearing the end of her pregnancy.

“She had an appointment—” he automatically began to scan Paige’s purchases “—so I said I would cover the store. It gives me a chance to connect with the people of our town on a more personal basis.”

Which Paige interpreted to mean that any poor soul who wandered in for essential grocery items was likely getting a healthy dose of Nate’s campaign propaganda along with every loaf of bread and quart of milk. “It always helps the voters to know their candidates,” she agreed.

He totaled her order and she gave him her money.

He made change, but didn’t immediately pass it across the counter. “I feel as if I should warn you about something.”

“I’m sure that’s not necessary.”

“I know you have...a history...with Sutter Traub,” he continued anyway. “But your public declaration of allegiance could make you unpopular in this town.”

“I don’t need to be popular—I’m not running for office.” She picked up her bag and held out her hand for her change.

“No,” he agreed, finally giving her the money. “But maybe your new boyfriend needs to know that you’re running around with your ex.”

* * *

Paige knew that she’d done nothing wrong, that there was absolutely no reason for her to feel as if she had, but that knowledge didn’t succeed in alleviating her guilt. Because the truth was, the whole time she’d been with Sutter the night before, she hadn’t once thought about Alex—not until Sutter had specifically asked her about the other man.

She didn’t know if that said something about her relationship with the mill foreman or if it was simply a side effect of being near Sutter. She’d been dating Alex for a couple of months now and, after fifteen minutes in Sutter’s company, she’d barely remembered his name. It was embarrassing to admit, even if only to herself, and Alex certainly deserved better than to be an afterthought.

So when she got home, she surveyed the contents of her refrigerator to ensure that she had the groceries she needed to put together a decent meal—because she was not going back to Crawford’s for another dose of Nate’s self-righteousness—then called Alex to invite him to come over for dinner. Though he seemed surprised by the impromptu invitation, he immediately accepted.

She set the table, even putting out candles and a bottle of wine, then set about preparing the meal. She was going to spend some time with Alex tonight and forget about Sutter Traub once and for all.

* * *

Sutter figured he must be a glutton for punishment. Why else would he have decided to drive down Cedar Street before he headed home the following night? It wasn’t as if it was on his way. It wasn’t really out of his way, but the most direct route would have been to continue along Main to Sawmill, since he had to cross the river at the Sawmill Street Bridge. Instead, he turned onto Cedar, then North Pine, so that he passed by Paige’s house.

And in passing by Paige’s house, he couldn’t possibly miss the battered truck parked outside of it. He knew that the Cruze parked in front of it belonged to Paige, and he suspected that the truck belonged to Alex Monroe, because he’d seen the same vehicle in the parking lot at the mill every day. His mother had warned him that Paige was dating the foreman, and Paige herself had confirmed it, but he still hadn’t wanted to believe it. But the truth was hard to deny when it was right in front of him.

She hadn’t invited Sutter in for a cup of coffee the night before because it was a school night. Well, it was a school night tonight, too, and she didn’t seem to have any qualms about having company. Or maybe she didn’t consider Alex company. Maybe—

Don’t go there.

He sharply reined in his wandering thoughts and continued on his way.

He’d honestly thought he’d let her go. When he’d driven away from Rust Creek Falls five years earlier and Paige had decided to stay, he’d known that was the end for them. And yet every time he was near her he felt the chemistry that had always sizzled between them. That sizzle warned Sutter that they weren’t as over as he wanted to believe.

Except the fact that she was at home tonight with her new boyfriend suggested that he might be the only one who felt they weren’t over. And that really sucked.

His mother had said that she was making pot roast for dinner, one of his favorites, but he’d declined her invitation to join the family—as he’d declined most of her invitations since returning to Rust Creek Falls. Too much had been said and done for Sutter to pretend otherwise, so aside from working with his father and brothers on the ranch, he usually kept to himself and prepared his own meals at Clay’s house. Tonight, he pulled into the parking lot of the Ace in the Hole instead.

He climbed the rough-hewn wooden steps and opened the screen door beneath the oversize playing card—an ace of hearts—that blinked in red neon. The bar was dimly lit and buzzing with conversations that mostly drowned out the Johnny Cash song emanating from the ancient Wurlitzer jukebox that still played three songs for a quarter. A long wooden bar ran the length of one wall and the dozen bar stools that faced the mirrored wall reflecting rows of glass bottles were already occupied, with several other patrons crowded in between the stools and leaned against the bar.

The booths that lined the outer walls were also filled, as were most of the wooden tables that surrounded the small dance floor in the middle of the room. Discarded peanut shells crunched under his boots as he made his way to one of those tables near the mostly unused stage in the far back corner. He pulled out the ladder-back chair and settled onto the creaky seat. The round wooden table was battered and scarred but appeared to be clean.

“What are you doing here?”

Sutter looked up, startled to see Paige’s sister Lani standing at his table. She was wearing a pair of jeans and a plaid shirt, so it was only when he saw the apron around her waist and the order pad in her hand that he realized she was his waitress.

And not a very happy one, judging by her tone, so he kept his deliberately light and said, “I was hoping to look at a menu.”

She tossed a single laminated page on the table. “That’s the menu—look all you want.”

“You probably don’t get very many tips with an attitude like that,” he mused.

“I’ll give you a tip—stay away from my sister.”

He looked around. “Is Lindsay here, too?”

Lani’s eyes narrowed. “You know very well that I’m talking about Paige.”

Ellie’s roast beef with a side of gentle prying suddenly seemed infinitely more palatable than substandard pub fare with prickly attitude, but no way was he going to let Paige’s little sister run him off.

“And I’ve barely seen her in the three months that I’ve been back in Rust Creek Falls,” he pointed out to her.

“You saw her last night,” Lani noted.

“Yeah, and here’s a news flash for you—it was a public meeting at town hall.”

“You walked her home.”

He didn’t bother to ask how she knew. This was Rust Creek Falls, where anyone might have seen them and no one could ever keep a secret for very long. “Actually, she would probably say that she was walking alone and I just happened to be beside her.”

“Good.”

“How about a beer while I try to decide between the cheeseburger and the bacon burger?”

“We’re out of bacon.”

“In that case, I’ll have the cheeseburger and a draft beer.”

She nodded and took the menu back, but she didn’t move away from his table. “Alex Monroe is a good guy—and he’s good to Paige.”

“Have I said anything to the contrary?”

“The fact that you’re still in Rust Creek Falls says plenty.”

“I’m here because I’m helping Collin with his campaign.”

“Then you’re going back to Seattle after the election?”

“Not that it’s any of your business,” he felt compelled to point out. “But yes, I’m going back to Seattle after the election.”

“And that’s why she’s better off with Alex,” she said triumphantly. “Because he won’t leave her.”

“But does he love her? And does she love him?”

“She’s with him,” Lani said firmly. “That’s all that should matter to you.”

He didn’t want to admit she was right, so he only shrugged, as if he was bored by the whole conversation. “Are you going to get my drink now?”

“Maybe.” She turned away and went to another table, where a young couple had just sat down. She took their order, immediately returned with their drinks, then went back to the bar again and finally brought Sutter his beer.

The election was in two more days, and then his job here would be over. He should probably hang around a little while longer to tie up any loose ends, but he figured it was safe to assume that he’d be back in Seattle within a week. Back to the freedom and contentment of being anonymous, back to the big city where there weren’t memories of Paige Dalton in every direction he turned.

He should forget the burger and get back to the ranch to start packing so he didn’t have to spend any more time in Rust Creek Falls than was absolutely necessary. Except that leaving this town meant leaving Paige again, a prospect that was just as unappealing now as it had been five years earlier.

She’s better off with Alex.

Sutter suspected that Lani was right, but he wasn’t going to believe it was what Paige wanted until he’d heard it directly from her lips.

* * *

Paige really liked Alex, but she wasn’t in love with him. And while she’d hoped that her feelings for him might grow and deepen with time, as she dished up the peach cobbler she’d made for dessert—using canned fruit in the recipe because there were no fresh peaches to be found in Montana at this time of year—she realized that wasn’t likely to happen. At least not so long as Sutter was in Rust Creek Falls.

Not going to think about him, she reminded herself sternly.

The admonishment snapped her attention back to the present but failed to banish all thoughts of the other man from her mind. Which probably wasn’t so surprising, considering her extensive history with Sutter. But that was what it was—history. He was her past, and Alex was her future.

Except that she was starting to question whether that was really true. She might want to think she and Alex could have a future, but the more time they spent together, the more difficult it was to imagine they would ever be anything more than friends.

He was an attractive man—objectively she knew this was true—but she wasn’t attracted to him. Her heart didn’t start to pound as soon as she saw him, her blood didn’t hum when he was close and her knees didn’t go weak when he kissed her. She guessed that Alex probably felt the same way, because he’d never tried to push her for more than the few kisses that they’d shared.

So why had she invited him to dinner tonight? Had she been hoping that he would say or do something to somehow change her mind about their relationship? That he would take her in his arms and kiss her until she was breathless and panting and wanted nothing more than to haul him upstairs to her bed?

As she poked at her dessert, she acknowledged that was what she’d been hoping. And when he’d walked through the door, Alex had kissed her. The kiss had been warm and pleasant...and over almost before it began.

“That was a fabulous meal,” Alex said, pushing his empty plate aside.

She forced a smile. “I’m glad you were able to make it on such short notice.”

“It wasn’t a hard decision, considering all that I had waiting at home was a frozen dinner.”

“So it was the home cooking and not my company that compelled you to accept my invitation?”

He reached across the table and linked their fingers together. “I always enjoy spending time with you, Paige.”

“Why do I feel as if there’s a but coming?”

His lips curved, but the smile didn’t reach his eyes. “But lately I’ve found myself wondering if there’s any hope for a future between us so long as you’re still hung up on Sutter Traub.”

“I’m not hung up on Sutter,” she immediately denied. “In fact, I’ve barely even seen him since he came back to Rust Creek Falls.”

“Because you’ve been avoiding him,” Alex guessed.

She pulled her hand away and stood up to clear the dishes from the table. “Because I don’t want to see him.”

He followed her into the kitchen. “Why would it matter if you didn’t still have feelings for him?”

She hated that he could so easily see a truth that she’d only recently acknowledged to herself. “Our relationship didn’t end amicably,” she admitted. “So there are probably some unresolved issues.”

“Then you need to resolve them,” Alex said gently.

“I need to move on with my life.”

“You’re an incredible woman, Paige. And I’ve enjoyed the time I’ve spent with you, but you’re never going to move on with your life until you put your history with Sutter behind you.”

“It’s five years behind me,” she protested.

“I stopped by town hall on my way home from work to catch the last part of the debate last night,” he told her. “And when you stood up to defend Sutter Traub, there was more passion in your words than in any of the kisses we’ve ever shared.”

She didn’t know how to respond to that except to say, “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” he said. “And don’t ever settle for less than everything you want.”

“You’re dumping me, aren’t you?”

He shook his head. “I’m letting you go so that you can figure out what you want. If you decide that’s me, you know where to find me.”

He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, then lowered his head and touched his lips to hers. It was a nice kiss. Light and friendly, and completely uninspiring. She wanted to feel heat or tingles—anything—in response to his touch, but there was nothing.

As she watched Alex drive away, she silently cursed Sutter Traub and the possibility that his kisses had ruined her for any other man.