Читать книгу Forget Me Not - Brenda Jackson - Страница 13

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY, ASHLEY.”

Ashley smiled across the breakfast table at Emmie, Kim and Suzanne. Three women whom she considered her closest and dearest friends. She honestly didn’t know what she would have done without them for the past three years. They had been her rock and, in some cases, her sanity. Yesterday Kim and Suzanne, whom she’d known since her high school days in Topeka, Kansas, had arrived in town to celebrate her thirtieth birthday with her.

What she appreciated more than anything was that none of them ever said the words “We know just what you’re going through.” Because they didn’t. No one did. But at least they had given her their shoulders to cry on and there had been a lot of crying times.

Emmie was the only one who lived in Hardeeville. Suzanne lived in Atlanta and Kim in Dallas. “Go ahead and open your gift,” Kim was saying, smiling brightly.

Ashley smiled back. The box was wrapped so prettily, she hated untying the bow. There was no telling what these three had bought her and she decided to try to guess. “Is it something I can eat?”

Emmie laughed. “No.”

“Umm, something I can wear?”

“Nope,” Suzanne said, grinning. “Just open the darn box, and I’m telling the waiter to bring us another bottle of wine.”

“Open it, Ash, before Suzanne drinks the whole bottle by herself,” Kim said, chuckling.

“Oh, all right.” Ashley began untying the bow and used the edge of her polished fingernail to carefully ease off the wrapping paper. Inside the box and buried beneath tissue paper was an envelope with her name sprawled across it in beautiful cursive. Ashley Ryan. Sometimes her mother would suggest that she go back to using her maiden name of Hardwick, and it upset her every time—as if she could just erase those five years with Devon from her life.

She slid her fingernail along the flap to open the envelope. “Ohh, wow...”

It was a gift certificate for a two-week stay at Shelby by the Sea. She’d heard reservations at the exclusive bed-and-breakfast in Catalina Cove, a quaint shipping town an hour’s drive from New Orleans, were booked for a full year in advance.

“We’re doing a girls’ trip,” Ashley said, smiling over at them.

Suzanne shook her head. “No, it’s not a girls’ trip.”

Ashley’s forehead bunched in confusion. “It’s not?”

“No,” Kim said.

“We know how hard these past three years have been for you, Ash,” Emmie was saying in a soft voice. “And we know you have decisions you need to make about a number of things.”

Since they were her best friends, they were well aware that her mother was determined to get her back into the dating scene. Ashley was satisfied just being left alone. It seemed no one but her best friends understood that. Her mother, Imogene Hardwick, certainly didn’t. All she was concerned about was becoming a grandmother while she was young enough to enjoy her grandkids. Ashley had even overheard her mother whisper to her father that if Devon had to die at least he could have left her pregnant.

Her parents’ moving to Hardeeville from Topeka was supposed to be temporary to give their daughter support, but Ashley saw it as just the opposite and wished they would return home. At least she’d gotten them out of her house after she’d come home from work one day to find her mother had removed all the framed photographs that Ashley and Devon had taken together. That had been the last straw and she’d asked them to leave that night.

Her father had given her an appreciative nod. Although he hadn’t supported his wife’s foolishness, he was a weakling when it came to standing up to her. Instead of returning to Topeka like Ashley had hoped they would do, they had moved to an apartment across town, and three years later Imogene was still in Hardeeville, causing havoc in Ashley’s life.

Ashley studied the gift certificate. “What will I do there for two weeks by myself?”

“Definitely not what I’d do for two weeks by myself,” Suzanne said, wiggling her brows. Since Suzanne was a divorcée who swore never to marry again but to just have fun with men, they could imagine what she’d do.

Emmie rolled her eyes before giving Ashley a pointed look. “For starters, you’ll get a break from your mother.”

“True,” Ashley said, taking a sip of her coffee. Everyone chuckled since they all knew what a handful Imogene Hardwick could be.

“You can relax and enjoy yourself.” Kim smiled and then added, “Jon Paul and I went to Catalina Cove for our honeymoon and loved it. I understand the original owner died and the owner’s niece inherited it. I heard she’s kept those things that made the bed-and-breakfast unique, yet she modernized some things that you can appreciate.”

Ashley nodded. Since Kim and Jon Paul had gone there for their honeymoon, she wouldn’t be surprised if there were a number of honeymooners there. How would she feel sharing space with them when they were starting their lives together, and hers had ended the day she lost Devon on their fifth anniversary? However, Ashley knew why they were sending her there. She couldn’t grieve for Devon forever. At some point she needed to get on with her life. A life without the man she loved. But she wasn’t sure she’d ever be ready to move on and allow another man into her life.

“We know what you’re thinking, Ash, and it’s okay if you come back with the same mind-set that you have now about things. But you can’t continue to work as hard as you do,” Emmie said, reaching out and touching her arm. “You haven’t taken any time off. You can’t continue to do so without giving your body and mind a break.”

Ashley drew in a deep breath. Emmie was right. Since losing Devon, she’d thrown herself into her work. StayNTouch had become her lifeline. She had started the company with Emmie six years ago. They connected friends as most social media companies did. But they went a little further by planning periodic trips for their members; sending reminders of important events such as birthdays, weddings and reunions; and becoming a huge support group when needed. And for the past three years it had been a support for her as well.

The membership was growing by leaps and bounds with Emmie handling the day-to-day operations and Ashley handling the daily blog pieces. They were a great team that worked well together. Throwing herself into her work meant less time to dwell on her pain. But the hurt was still there when she went home to an empty house. She’d thought of selling but she couldn’t when the place contained so many memories of her and Devon’s time together.

“We want you to be happy, Ash.”

She tried smiling through the heartache she still felt. “I know, but two weeks is a long time.”

Suzanne chuckled. “If we could have gotten away with giving you a month, we would have. You need time to yourself, Ash. Away from your job, your house, your mother and those men she’s trying to shove down your throat every chance she gets.”

The latter in and of itself was enough to make her want to pack tonight and leave for two weeks. She glanced at the gift certificate and then back at her friends, smiled and asked, “So, how soon can I leave?”

* * *

RAY SULLIVAN EASED up to sit on the side of the bed and rubbed his hand down his face. The morning sun was shining bright through a slit in the blinds as he glanced at the calendar pinned to the wall. The date was June 10. Why did he feel this date should have some meaning to him?

It was days like this that he hated with a vengeance the situation he’d been in for the last three years. He was a man without a memory, and the sad thing was that he had no clue as to why or how he’d gotten in this predicament.

The only thing he remembered was waking up in a hospital room after being told he’d been in a coma for three weeks. According to the doctor, he had been found by a jogger in a wooded area severely beaten. From the depth of his injuries, specifically the condition of his hands, wrists and knuckles, he’d put up a good fight, but in the end, he’d been pistol-whipped into unconsciousness. Massive brain trauma had resulted in retrograde amnesia. In other words, he had awakened from his coma a man with no memory of his past life.

Due to the severity of his head injuries, there was a chance that he would never regain his memory. And since he hadn’t had any identifying articles on him, they couldn’t even contact the family who might be looking for him. The indentation on the third finger of his left hand led them to believe he was a married man. In fact, the doctors had told him that whoever assaulted him had almost broken Ray’s finger in forcing the ring off his hand.

He had no recollection of a wife. There was a strong possibility she believed he was dead and there was a chance after all this time she had moved on with her life. If that was the case, what was stopping him with moving on with his?

He’d asked himself that question countless times and always came back to the same answer. The last thing he wanted was to meet someone and fall in love, only to get his memory back and be in love with another woman. It wouldn’t be fair to either woman. So he’d made the decision to remain a single man with no involvements.

He had remained in the hospital three months before he’d been well enough to leave. He’d been well physically, but he doubted he would ever be well mentally again. How could he when he couldn’t remember anything...but one thing? He loved being out on the water.

That was how he’d ended up in Catalina Cove, Louisiana. One of his doctors had reached out to a college friend who owned a shipping company in the small town. He’d been given the new identity of Ray Sullivan and was hired by Chambray Seafood Unlimited Shipping Company without so much as an interview.

He had arrived a few days later in what Ray thought had to be the most breathtaking town he’d ever remembered seeing, but since he had no memory, that really hadn’t meant much. But still, he knew the job here was a godsend.

From the townsfolk, he’d learned the parcel of land the cove sat on that backed out to the gulf had been a gift to the notorious pirate Jean Lafitte, from the United States of America for his role in helping the states fight for independence from the British during the War of 1812. Some believed he wasn’t buried at sea in the Gulf of Honduras like history claimed but was buried somewhere in the waters surrounding Catalina Cove.

For years because of Lafitte’s influence, the cove had been a shipping town. It still was, which was evident by the number of fishing vessels that lined the piers in what was known as the shipping district. The Moulden River was full of trout, whiting, shrimp and oysters. Tourists would come from miles around to sample the town’s seafood, especially the oysters. Ray had been hired by Chambray to harvest all that seafood from the ocean.

The man who’d picked him up from the airport that day had been Kaegan Chambray, the owner of the company. Ray hadn’t a clue to his real birthday, only the one he’d been given before leaving the hospital, but he figured that he and Kaegan were pretty close in age.

Over the past three years Kaegan hadn’t just been his boss but had become a close friend. In fact, Kaegan and the town’s sheriff, Sawyer Grisham, were the only two people in Catalina Cove who knew about his memory loss. Everyone else assumed he was a thirty-four-year-old divorcé whom Kaegan had known prior to returning to the cove to take over his family’s shipping company.

That assumption worked in Ray’s favor, although most people—namely, the single women in town—couldn’t understand why he wasn’t interested in dating even if remarrying wasn’t on his mind. For him there was no way he could ever commit to a new life with a woman when he knew nothing about his old life. To avoid being caught in such a situation he’d decided the best thing for him was to avoid all personal involvements with women. So far that situation suited him just fine, even if it was a little lonely.

He stood and stretched, knowing that except for the loss of his memory he had a lot to be thankful for. For the past two and a half years he’d work hard for Kaegan and saved most of his earnings. With Kaegan as cosigner, two months ago Ray became the owner of Ray’s Tours, a company that offered private ocean tours around the cove.

Now he woke up every morning with a purpose and before going to bed at night he would record that day’s activities in his journal. As he headed for the bathroom he was again bothered by a niggling thought that although he didn’t have a clue why, for some reason he believed that today used to be an important one for him.

* * *

“I CAN’T BELIEVE you aren’t telling me and Dad where you’ll be for two weeks. What if an emergency comes up? What if I want to tell Elliott where you are in case he wanted to join you? What if—?”

“How dare you think you can invite a man I barely know to join me anywhere,” Ashley said, not able to control her anger as she moved around her bedroom, packing. She knew she’d made the right decision in not telling her parents where she would be for two weeks.

“Honestly, Ashley, I don’t understand why you’re getting upset. According to Elliott, the two of you have talked on the phone a couple of times.”

Ashley’s anger escalated. Elliott Booker was the latest single guy her mother was trying to shove at her. She’d met him a mere month ago when he’d conveniently shown up at her parents’ place for dinner one Sunday. Since then the man had called her a couple of times after getting her phone number from her mother.

“You turned thirty last week,” her mother was saying. “I read those magazines for today’s women and know casual affairs are the thing now for single women your age. Do you really think your friends expect you to spend two weeks alone?”

“Yes. In fact, I know they do, and do you know why?” Without waiting for her mother to respond, she said, “Because they know what I’m ready for and what I am not ready for, which is something you evidently don’t know about me, your own daughter.”

“It’s been three years, Ashley. I think it’s time for you to move on.”

“I decide when it’s time, Mom, not you or anyone else. I’ll call you after I get back. If an emergency comes up and you need to reach me, Emmie will know how to contact me. Goodbye, Mom.” She hung up the phone.

Ashley continued packing, refusing to dwell on yet another argument she’d had with her mother. Instead she wanted to think about the two weeks she would be spending in Catalina Cove doing whatever she wanted to do. And unlike what her mother thought, it wouldn’t involve a man.

Ashley twisted her wedding ring on her finger. A ring she refused to take off even after three years. She would never forget that night when instead of Devon returning home, she’d gotten a visit from her local police department after having been contacted by authorities in Cincinnati. Because of heavy rains and icy roads, the rental car Devon was driving had skidded and he’d lost control on the Langley Memorial Bridge and gone through a guardrail to plunge into the Ohio River.

Ashley had screamed so loud that her neighbors had come to see what had happened. When her parents had arrived in town the next day, Ashley was still in a state of shock. To this day she didn’t know how she’d managed to get through the following week. Traffic cameras had shown the exact moment Devon had lost control. Because of the depth of the river, they never recovered the car or Devon’s body. However, his briefcase with all his papers inside, including the anniversary card he had gotten for her, had floated to the top a couple of weeks later. It was only then that she accepted her husband was not coming back.

Deep down she, of all people, knew it was time to move on and Devon would have wanted her to do so, but she couldn’t. His clothes were still in his closet and his belongings were where he’d left them. The only person it bothered was her mother, who was ready for her to move on, but Ashley didn’t care what her mother was ready for because she wasn’t.

Ashley went into the living room and glanced around. The plants she’d managed to keep alive since Devon’s funeral would be taken care of by Emmie, who had a key to her place. Emmie would also collect her mail while she was gone. Now more than ever, Ashley was glad her mother had no idea where she was going.

She paused before going into the kitchen to gaze at the sunflower, the last one Devon had given her for their anniversary, the one that had been with all those roses. Emmie had gotten the huge sunflower freeze-dried and placed in a beautiful crystal case for her to have forever. A constant reminder of the love she and Devon had shared.

After eating dinner, Ashley put on the videos she’d been watching a lot lately. The one of her and Devon’s wedding. She also watched a video Suzanne had had made, which contained a collection of every photograph Ashley and Devon had ever taken together, set to some of their favorite songs.

An hour later after watching the videos, Ashley’s shirt was wet from her tears. She knew she couldn’t continue on this way. Maybe she should have done as the grief counselor suggested and retained a therapist to help her through the healing process. But a part of her hadn’t wanted to heal because doing so meant moving on without Devon and she wasn’t ready for that.

But maybe the two weeks she would spend at Shelby by the Sea would be a start.