Читать книгу Ludell - Brenda Wilkinson - Страница 8

2.

IT SEEMED THAT the rain would never stop, but it finally did just before time to leave school. The minute Mis Rivers said “dismissed,” Ludell took off, hoping to get a leadway on Willie Johnson and the other boys in the sixth grade, who lately were running all the fifth grade girls home.

She was lucky today; they weren’t out of their room yet and man was she flying! When she got to the corner, she could tell they were coming from Ruthie Mae’s screams. A safe distance away, she stopped to look back and saw them catching Ruthie Mae.

“I told her to be ready to take off when the bell rang, but she had to keep messing roun,” Ludell thought, smiling triumphantly. “Maybe she’ll follow my advice tomorrow.” She laughed watching Ruthie Mae struggle. “Better her than me, cause they aine gon do much to her nohow.”

Ruthie Mae always got off light, being her brother Willie was one of the girl-beaters. All they ever did to her was maybe pull her hair like they were doing now, or something of the sort, depending on what Willie would let them get away with. The main thing was to show her that she had to run like the other girls—brother, or no brother.

Ruthie Mae was screaming her head off, when Willie finally came running up, signaling for the boys to let her go. Then he grabbed her and demanded that she carry his books the rest of the way home. She hollered that she wouldn’t and found herself back in the hands of the two boys who’d caught her. One held on to her, while the other one tickled her. In between laughing and screaming, she begged Willie to make them stop, promising she’d take the books now.

He shoved them into her arms so hard and fast, she almost slipped in the mud. They were all just laughing at Ruthie Mae, and instead of Ludell getting on along while she could, she stood at a distance cracking her side too. Then in a fit of flurry they were after her! She tried her best to outrun them but couldn’t. Willie had her left arm, twisting it round in back of her and she was screaming madly.

“Now what you mean taking off from me so fast today young lady?” he said all bossy. “Don’t you know I starts the running roun here firse? Th-een, you take off and try to get away!”

“She musta jumped out the window or something!” shouted one of the other boys. “Cause she was all the way up here when we got roun the comer!”

Willie stood still, holding her arm somewhat loosely, but not enough for her to jerk away. She felt as though he didn’t really want to beat her, but she knew he would regardless, to show off.

“I’m gon give you a couple of licks to teach you a lesson young lady,” he said, pulling a switch from a bush.

“Willie Johnson I done already told yo mama on you now boy! If you beat me wit that switch, I’m going straight to the principal tomorrow and tell her bout how you be chasing and beating up all the fifth grade girls everyday!” she shouted.

“I ’on care,” he said. “Evon Jenkins already did, and I just tole Mis Stevanson that yall be flirting with me. She said it’s probably true cause she know how fresh girls can be! Then she tole ole Evon to git on back to her room, and she let me go just like that!” he said laughing. “Now you just hold still so we can get this over with.”

“Swish, swish,” he went with the switch, brushing her lightly across the legs. It wasn’t hurting that much, but she felt so shame—him standing there whipping her like he was somebody’s mama! She began kicking at him wildly, and he laughed and said, “Look at them ashy legs!” The other boys laughed harder now. “Betch they don’ know what lotion is!” Willie added, and they all went crazy laughing while she screamed and kicked.

“Turn me loose, you big-headed ba-boon! Leave me lone you ole stanky gopher you!” she cried.

Ruthie Mae came dragging up, all weighed down with two sets of books.

“Willie whon’t you leave that girl lone boy? I’m telling mama on you time she git home! And HERE! TAKE YO BOOKS!” she shouted, throwing them down on the wet ground and taking off!

“Girl I’m gon kill you now!” he hollered, letting go of Ludell in his anger. He bent down, picked up the books, and started wiping off the mud, looking cheap. His own buddies couldn’t help laughing. Ludell was dying to but was too scared. Mad as he was already, she figured he might turn and beat her brains out on the spot. She started running, and as soon as it was safe, began shouting back to him, laughing and teasing him about his muddy books. Then as he and the boys came closer, she began making it for her door.

Heading up the steps, she could see Ruthie Mae over next door. “You sho fixed him good-fashioned,” she hollered over to her, as Ruthie Mae rushed inside. Though their mother Mis Johnson wasn’t there, Mattie their oldest sister was, and she wouldn’t allow Willie to beat up Ruthie Mae.

“You-you,” Ludell stuttered, trying desperately to think of something extra bad to call the boys as they passed her house. Unable to think of anything super, she settled for plain “ole black dogs” to which one boy responded, “Ya mama!”

“Yours,” she said softly, feeling licked. She started for the door and suddenly remembered that she hadn’t taken off her tennises. Rushing back off the porch and tipping around to the side of the house, she eased underneath and changed into her shoes.

Mama hadn’t left for work this morning on time, so she’d had to hide her tennises under her jacket until she got outside. She knew well that she had taken a big chance, because Mis Henley could have pulled up and blew for mama while she was switching shoes. Had she, mama would have surely had Mis Henley wait while she whipped her, because mama wasn’t one for putting off a whipping.

Ludell was hurrying, realizing that she could still get caught. She didn’t know how she was going to get the sneakers inside. She couldn’t put them under her jacket now because they were wet and would mess up her dress that she had to wear again tomorrow. She was sure of one thing though, and that was that she’d better hurry and get in that house before mama came looking for her. Unable to think of anything else to do with them, she stuck the tennises inside her notebook, and slung her jacket over it.

Walking into the house she was thinking, “Lo-oord what if mama be sitting on the porch one day when I come strutting up not wearing my shoes!”

“The chances I’m taking,” she said shaking her head. “But it’s worth every risk I take—not having to wear them boy-looking shoes and have everybody at school picking at me. Specially ole Willie! He always saying something bout me!”

“I know he’d just have himself a field day if he ever saw these,” she thought, looking down at the brown oxfords as she stepped into her room. “Dessa must be crazy sending these thangs down here to me,” she said, taking them off. “Maybe they the style in New Yawk, but they sho ain’t in Waycross!”

She took off her dress and started putting on some playthings; then bent down to stick the tennises under her bed to dry out.

“Hey!” mama said, easing up on her and making her jump up from the floor.

“Oooh! H-hey mama,” she went, turning around to face her.

“What you jumping for chile?” her grandmother asked.

“You scared me mama, that’s why. I didn’t hear you coming.”

“I was in the kitchen there, sprinkling down my ironing,” mama explained. “I thought it was past time for you to be in, so I was going to the front to look. I didn’t even know you was back here already. I guess you finally learning how to walk inside without slamming the door,” she said laughing. “That’s how I can use-ually tell you here!”

Ludell smiled, then asked, “You want me to help you with the ironing today mama?”

“Naw, mostly I got Mr. Henley’s white shirts to do,” she answered. “Rich as they is, you’d thank he’d send them thangs to the cleaners! You can gone play—but don’ git carried away and let the streetlights catch you out there again. If you aine here ’fore dark, I’m gon come beat you rat there in fronta everybody—you hear?”

“Yes mam,” she said heading for the door, then running on out.

“And stop slamming that dev-lish door!” mama hollered, after Ludell forgot and did it again.

She headed straight next door to Ruthie Mae’s. Carefully avoiding the places where her foot could slip through on the Johnsons’ ragged wooden porch, Ludell thought, “Be kinda tough hiding shoes under the porch over here man.”

She knocked on the door and lil snotty-nosed Cathy came running to see who it was. When Ludell asked if her sister was home, Cathy got smart with her and said, “Which sister? I got two!”

“You know I’m talking bout Ruthie Mae, girl,” said Ludell.

“And you know she home,” replied Cathy. “Ruthie Mae, YOU-KNOW-WHO is here!” she shouted.

Ludell rolled her eyes at Cathy, and she in turn stuck her tongue out at Ludell and went running on toward the back of the house.

“Ludell?” Ruthie Mae said walking to the door.

“Huh?” she went.

“A-I-I-I!” shouted Ruthie Mae. “I caught you, I caught you! You didn’t say ‘yes-my-darling!’”

They had joined in “yes-my-darling” a week ago, along with three more girls in their class. Anytime someone you had joined in with called your name and you said “huh” like Ludell had, or “what” “yes” or anything but “yes-my-darling,” you had to do whatever that person told you.

“Well it don’ make no difference your catching me, Ruthie Mae, cause you still owe me one from that time I caught you in school and Mis Rivers came back in the room before I could make you do anything.”

“Okay then,” she said. “We even.”

“Let’s go jump some sprangboard,” suggested Ludell.

“All right, but we gotta make a new one. Know that good sprangboard we had all this week?”

“Yeah,” said Ludell as they walked around back. “What about it? Where’s it at?” she asked, looking where they’d jumped the day before.

“Well,” began Ruthie Mae. “Mr. Willie had the devil in him bout me throwing his books in the mud, and since Mattie wouldn’t let him beat me, he came out here and chopped up ou-r sprangboard for spite. Took the boards and used them for firewood in our room. Alllll the wood we got back here, and he had to chop up our sprangboard. Firse place he didn’t need to start no fire, cause it aine cold. He got it justa blazing in the front room fireplace! Mattie she asked him why he started a fire, and he come talking bout to take the dampness off the house. Mama gon dampness him, cause I’m sho gon tell! Him wasting that wood like that! When it really git cold and we be short o’ wood he gon be wishing he hadda saved it! Come on over here behind the wood shack, there’s some long pieces stacked back there. Maybe we can find another good wide board like we had. He-eey, there go a good piece right over yonder! Come on, help me pull it outta there.”

They pulled the board out from under the stack, then took two short blocks of wood and placed them beneath it, and their new sprangboard was ready.

Willie walked out the back door just as they were finishing and looked at them and laughed.

“You thank you hurt somebody, don’t ya?” hollered Ruthie Mae. “But we got a better one than we had before!”

“Oh I aine stutting bout yall,” he said, going on about his business picking up pecans.

Willie was always getting into it with Ruthie Mae, but he never messed with Ludell except going or coming from school. The rest of the time he just ignored her, even when she tried to be friendly. He’d pass by her in their house just like she was a chair, and outside like she was a tree or something standing there. He was so innocent at home! Ludell was sure that was why Mis Johnson didn’t do no more than fuss a little when she’d told about him chasing her from school. She knew Mis Johnson probably thought she started it all, the way that boy was so quiet around her. Other than hollering at Ruthie Mae—which he did very little of in front of his mama—he hardly said a word. Sometimes Ludell would catch him looking at her out the corner of his eye; then he’d quickly turn the other way. He was so-ooome strange to her, that Willie.

Ruthie Mae stepped on one end of the sprangboard and Ludell on the other. As they bounced each other into the air they sang, “My mama gave me fifteen cent, to see the elephant jump the fence . . .”

“Sure wished I had some money for real,” Ludell said as they continued to bounce each other higher and higher.

“Me too,” said Ruthie Mae. “Mama was short of money this morning, so she said to eat all ou-r breakfast and that would hold us till we came from school. I thought she was gon have something good waiting, but she just left word for Mattie to heat up some peas and rice from las night if we wanted something ’fore supper. Shoot, I just rather starve till this evening myself, cause I aine in the mood for no heated-up mess like that!”

Ludell laughed and went, “I know what you mean chile.” She paused, then said, “On the way over here I was looking down wishing I could find me a nickel or something.”

“Onetime I found a whole dollar!” Ruthie Mae shouted. “And gir-rl,” she said, starting to jump slower, “I bought me so much good can-deee! And ya know them big pickles roun to Mis Kelly’s that come in the package with the juice?”

“Yeah,” said Ludell.

“Well I used to always say when I got me fifteen cents at one time, I was gonna git me one of them sw-eeeet big juicy lookin pickles! Well, girl, I bought one and foundt out they wasn’t no sweet pickles! That thang was so sour! I couldn’t even git that greedy Hawk to eat it, and you know that Hawk! He usually eat ANY-THANG!” she shouted, causing them both to laugh so heartily that they missed and jumped completely off the springboard.

“Oooh, I nearly bout broke my leg chile,” cried Ludell. “I ’on wanna jump no mo! Yeeah, I really do wish I had some money,” she said, rubbing her leg as they walked around front.

“No more than I do,” said Ruthie Mae. “If Willie hadn’t picked up them las lil pe-cans, we coulda at least got them together and traded for a quarter’s worth o’ candy. And I’d ’ave made sure to ask for the candy insteada the money too, cause one day las week, me, Buddie Boy, and Hawk had picked a big-o bag fulla pe-cans, and when we went roun to Mis Kelly’s to sell them, she come giving us a dime apiece. One thin dime!” she shouted. “Willie said we shoulda waited and went to the pe-can factory. He said he bet we coulda got bout two dollars for all them pe-cans we had. He say that’s what Mis Kelly do when she git enough up from all the Colored children roun here dumb enough to take their pe-cans to her—like me and Hawk nem. Willie say she take em rat uptown and sell em!”

“That’s a shame!” Ludell said as they flopped down on the steps.

“I hate to see pe-can season leaving,” went Ruthie Mae. “At least you could trade them when you be hungry.”

“Or eat em one,” Ludell added. “All of em gone offa ou-r tree for the season already.”

“Them got to be the last of ou-rs what the rain knocked down today,” said Ruthie Mae. “Willie would have bout a whole croker sack full by now, if the rest o’ us hadn’t been stealing em—running roun to Mis Kelly’s like fools, plus eating em up. That’s why he took em inside. Got em way in back of mama’s chiafarobe wit all kine o’ junk piled round em, where aine no way you can git in em wifout making some noise!”

“Hee, hee,” laughed Ludell. “You must be done tried.”

“You know that!” she shouted. “I’ll sure be glad when he do sell them,” she continued. “So I can get my money. I wish it was today. We could go roun to Mis Kelly’s and git some of them new kind o’ creme cookies she got. You only get ten for a dime, but they worth it! They got thick creamy lemon iceling in the middle, and . . .”

“Oh hush, don’t talk about them no mo girl!” went Ludell. “I caine stand it! You making me so hungry, and I aine in no hurry for supper cause we had stewbeef left over from supper las night, and wit mama ironing she aine bout gon stop to cook nothing new for tonight. And chile, nothing in the worle taste worse to me than some leftover stewbeef!”

“That’s cause you aine never tried Mattie’s heated-up peas and rice!” Ruthie Mae laughed.

“Girl you crazy,” Ludell said, shaking her head as they continued to sit there with their elbows propped on their knees and their chins cupped in their hands.

“Sho is something how the sun came out so bright like this after it rained so hard today, ain’t it?” Ludell asked.

“Sure is. I thought the steps was gon feel damp, didn’t you?”

“Uh-huh,” Ludell answered.

Then they just sat there all quiet for a while until Ruthie Mae went, “Ludell?”

“Yes-my-darling,” she answered.

“Oh I wasn’t thanking bout no ‘yes-my-darling,’ chile,” Ruthie Mae said. “I’m figuring out something.”

“What?” Ludell asked.

“Would you be scared to go roun to the store with me to put something on my mama’s bill?” Ruthie Mae whispered.

“Girl, Mis Kelly aine gon let you do that!” Ludell said.

“Yes she will,” said Ruthie Mae. “Mama done sent me for stuff before. All I gotta do is sign our las name on the back o’ the slip, after I say, ‘Mama say put it on the bill.’”

“For real?” Ludell asked.

“Yeah, that’s all I hafta do,” she answered.

“Well if you aine scared, I ain’t,” Ludell said.

“Okay, come on then,” Ruthie Mae said rising.

On the way there, the plan was laid. Instead of just crediting creme cookies, Ruthie Mae was going to get some bologna and something to drink, because, she explained, “It would look kinda funny just crediting two ten-cent packages of creme cookies.”

Hurrying along they soon reached the store, then walked inside looking innocent and got everything. When Mis Kelly rang it all up, Ruthie Mae said what she planned to, and Mis Kelly passed her the slip to sign, without comment.

Ludell was scared until they got outside, but was glad she’d come as she eyed the goodies. They took the long way back home down Sicamore street, and began eating right away. When they came to the Kangaroo man’s house Ruthie Mae said, “Come on, let’s go roun in back of here and finish eating.”

“You crazy?” Ludell shouted, stepping back. “I ’on even like to have to pass here, let alone go up close to that house. They say the Kangaroo man come back and haint people if he ketch em roun here!”

“Oh, I ’on believe that mess Ludell! Aine no such thang as ghosts, and hainting, and all that junk!”

“Well my grandmama say,” Ludell began.

“Well yo grandmama just ole-timey,” Ruthie Mae snapped, cutting her off.

“Girl don’ be talking bout my grandmama; I ’on play that,” Ludell firmly stated.

“Oh chile, I aine trying to talk bout nobody’s grandmother. I’m just trying to tell you that the older people still believe in ghosts and stuff like that. Mama say when she was a girl, the old people would sit roun at night talking bout men wit no heads riding horses and stuff; then they’d make the children go out to the pump for water cause they’d be too scared to go theirselves. Mama say when they put you in that ground, you is there to stay till judgment day, don’ care what nobody say!”

“Just what you thank we gon do if we don’ go back there?” Ruthie Mae asked. “We got a lot o’ stuff to eat. I shouldn’t ’ave got no whole pound of bologna,” she said looking down at all the meat remaining. “Well, what you gon do?” she repeated like Ludell was really starting to get on her nerves. “We look kind o’ stupid just standing here in the middle of the road eating!”

“Okay, okay,” went Ludell. “You can hush your mouth—I’ll go.”

As Ruthie Mae began to lead the way in back, Ludell followed cautiously, looking in every direction. She’d never been this close to the Kangaroo man’s house. It was brown, or used to be. Now it was all faded. The porch was about to fall in and the house had started to lean. There was a big oak tree on one side of the place and around front were rows and rows of bushes growing wild. All that could be seen of the front from the street was a rusty porch-swing chain hanging from the ceiling, giving Ludell chills each time she passed.

The Kangaroo man had been dead a long time now. When Ludell was smaller she’d been convinced that his mama was really a kangaroo like all the children at school said. The only times she’d seen him were coming from the store. He’d be all bent over with whatever he had cupped in his hands, like a kangaroo holding its baby. Whenever any children saw him coming they’d say, “Hey Mr. Kangaroo Man!” and he’d start chasing them. However if you didn’t pick at him, he would keep walking and talking to himself and not bother you. He never had to worry about Ludell messing with him! After he died she’d asked mama all about him. Mama said:

“Never did know the man’s real name, but they tell me he was in World War II and got shot down in a airplane. Folks had done give him up for dead. Then bout five years later, some mens was hunting and they came up on this straaange-looking creature. Hair down clean to his back, face all hairy, butt-naked! Firse they thought he was a caveman left over from earlytimes, being that he looked like he did—plus he was down on all fours! They say he was making funny sounds, eating grasshoppers, weeds, and some o’ everything! Wee-ll, the mens got a net and caged him. They tell me he really went wild then! Then they looks and see he got this here dog tag what they wear in the army hanging roun his neck, and bless my soul they discovers he’s a soldier. They placed him in the hospital for the longest, but soon as he learned how to talk again, he begged em to let him go. Tell me the army paid him allll his back pay and gave him a big check every month rat up till he passed.”

Fascinated with the story on him, Ludell would ask her to tell it time and time again; and she would, always adding something new.

“You ever been in the back before, Ruthie Mae?” Ludell asked, standing behind her trembling.

“Shoot yeah!” she answered.

“For real?” said Ludell. “When?”

“Chile, me and Willie nem came roun here and peeped ’fore the Kangaroo man even died!” she shouted, strutting over to a stump. “Come on, we can sit here,” she said.

“I ’on believe you ever came back here girl,” Ludell said, getting as close to her as possible. “Specially not wit him living,” she added.

“Yes I did,” went Ruthie Mae. “Ask Willie and Buddie Boy if you don’ believe me—but don’ slip up and mention bout us being roun here today now!”

“I aine gon even ask em,” said Ludell. “I just remembered how you was crazy enough to pick at him when you were little, so you was probably crazy enough to come roun here peeping too. Yall see anything strange?”

“Naw,” she said. “But he came out here and gave us something though.”

“Gave yall something?” Ludell asked, her eyes stretched and waiting for more. “Gave yall what?’

“Well,” began Ruthie Mae, “we was standing right over yonder by the edge of the porch trying to peep in that there window when we heard him coming. It was too late to run, so we all scooted down under the porch. He walked out the door and the next thang we knew, some greasy dishwater was landing on us!”

“Oooh, that musta been funny,” Ludell said. “What yall do next?”

“Funny nothing!” shouted Ruthie Mae with her mouth full. “We had rice and junk all over us and was all wet and slimy. What we do?—What else could we do but take our lil dumb butts on home. Mama tore all us up when she foundt out we’d been snooping roun here.”

Her story was so funny that Ludell had just about forgotten all the scarey ones about the place, when she heard Ruthie Mae shout, “A GHOST!”

“I-I-IIIII!” Ludell screamed, taking off, dropping cookies and all, as she ran toward the front. Wondering why Ruthie Mae wasn’t coming, she glanced back and saw her all bent over, cracking up.

“Oh Lordy,” Ruthie Mae went, walking to the front. “I aine never been so tickled in all my born days! Girl I didn’t know you could run so fast—I aine know an-ti-bodie could run so fast!”

“Ha, ha, ha,” Ludell said sarcastically. “So you got me! You know you made me drop the rest o’ my stuff, don’t you?”

“Well I’m sorry bout that part,” Ruthie Mae laughed. “But whatever lil bit you lost was worth the joke! Plus now I done got you back.”

“Got me back for what?” she asked her.

“I saw you up there laughing when Willie and them boys had me after school.”

“Oh that?” went Ludell as they headed on up Highsmith street. “Them boys git on my nerves. I told Willie I was gon report him to Mis Stevanson and he just laffed at me. He say Evon already did and he toldt Mis Stevanson that we be bothering him first. Said she believed him too!”

“That’s how every las one o’ them teachers at Hunter Hill are,” remarked Ruthie Mae. “They so quick to believe girls are always being fresh! Seem like with them being ladies and us girls, they’d be on our side, but they rather take the word of them story-telling rascals like my brother!”

By the time they got back Mattie was calling Ruthie Mae to come eat. She looked and saw that Ludell was still around and offered her some dinner, expecting her to say yes, but to Mattie’s surprise she said no thank you. Mattie turned around and stretched her eyes in disbelief, smiling. Her gesture made Ludell pretty mad. Although she ate there plenty, she didn’t feel like her saying no had called for all that out of Mattie!

Mis Johnson always let Mattie take charge of supper and everything since she got in so late. Mattie was like a younger mama around the house—well actually she was a mama. She had a little baby boy. It was just hard for them to think of her being a mama when just three summers ago it was thirteen-year-old Mattie who’d take Ludell and Ruthie Mae’s “last” when they played baseball; then fourteen-year-old Mattie trying to teach them how to jitterbug. Now she was sixteen, with a baby, and getting fatter and meaner by the day.

Mattie was a good cook. Ludell knew she should have been shame of herself always eating at their house, when there were so many of them, but sometimes it would just be smelling too good to say no. Especially when Mattie made that big iron pot full of spaghetti! She’d mix the spaghetti and sauce of meat and onions together; then serve it piled deliciously on rice, making it impossible to turn down! However, Ludell didn’t feel that Mattie minded much about her eating when they had something like spaghetti, because she could stretch it; but then this afternoon was another story! She was certain Mattie was glad she wasn’t joining them, for they were having fried chicken! In spite of the fact that she wasn’t hungry, Ludell was sorry she’d said no when her nose caught a whiff of what they were having. For a second she thought of asking Ruthie Mae to tell Mattie she’d changed her mind, but was too shame to do it.

Especially considering that look Mattie had given her before.

“Mmmm, man-oh-man look at that chicken,” she thought as it was placed upon the table. “Wonder what they doing having chicken on Thursday?” she asked herself.

Buddie Boy and Hawk were fussing about both wanting two breasts and two short thighs; and Ruthie Mae and Cathy were arguing about who was going to get to sit by the window. Mattie, who had one arm around her baby on her hip, took her free hand and grabbed the broom from the corner. Aiming it toward the table, she hollered that she was “gon bus all their brains out if they didn’t shut-up!”

While they carried on, Willie stood quietly at the stove fixing his plate to take out the kitchen. There had been a time when Ludell thought it was on account of her that Willie did that, but Ruthie Mae explained to her one day that he wouldn’t eat in front of anybody but them.

Ludell stood over in the corner smiling, watching everything. Even not eating, it was a treat being part of suppertime with the Johnsons. They were joking about how Hawk wasn’t leaving any gristle on the bones; talking about who pulled the biggest piece off the pullybone; fussing about who already had two glasses of Kool-Aid.

Mattie had her baby on her lap, feeding him from her plate, giving him one mouthful to about every four she was taking. He looked like a little bird with his mouth all stretched open waiting for her to get back to him.

Ludell wanted to stay until they finished so she could watch the fight when Mattie started trying to make them do the dishes, but it was getting late and she hadn’t forgotten mama’s warning. She’d seen Willie going in the front room with his plate, so she went on out the back way home after saying good-bye to the rest of them. She figured she’d spare him the misery of her passing him eating. Once she had, and he’d nearly choked.

Walking home she looked down at the remains of an anthill that the rain had washed down, thinking about how often the poor ants must have had to rebuild—not just from a rainy day, but all the times mean people stepped on their homes on purpose. All those times of building back up, that is, the ones who weren’t completely washed or squashed away. Once when Ruthie Mae was about to step on some ants that weren’t messing with her, Ludell had pulled her back shouting, “DON’T!” Naturally Ruthie Mae asked what was wrong with stepping on a stupid ole anthill. Ludell then explained her feelings about breaking up a whole family, had Ruthie Mae stepped on the mound. “I ’on even step on a ant walking by itself if I see it,” she added. “It could be a mother or father on the way home with food for their children, and the lil babies would be there waiting and wondering, never even knowing their mama or daddy dead. Or it could even be a ant child out playing and the mother never knowing it’s outside gone.”

Ruthie Mae had laughed at her and told her she was crazy. Then when Ludell looked hurt, she changed it from “crazy” to “too soft-hearted.”

As Ludell swung open the back door, the smell of stewbeef hit her in the face. She entered the kitchen and saw mama scooping it up from the pots and placing it on their plates with rice. After washing up and saying the grace, she began forcing her supper down.

“Heard from your mother today,” mama said, sitting across from her.

Ludell remained silent and kept eating, trying to hurry and finish the stuff.

“Say she sending a TV,” mama added.

“A whaat?” Ludell screamed, dropping her fork.

“Thought that would get yo attention!” mama uttered. “She say the lady she work for gave her one and that since she already had one, she was sending it to us.”

“For real?” exclaimed Ludell. “Oh man, a TV! When she gon send it, mama?”

“She claim sometime next week, but don’ hold yo breath, cause you know yo mama when it come to sending stuff when she promise. Had me worried to death sending yo Easter stuff at the las minute las year. Still writing bout she gon come git you and take you back to New Yawk City. Caine half take care of herself. Wasn’t nothing but skin and bones last time she was here, with all her fancy wigs and fancy ways! Hee, hee, that’s a good joke—fancy wigs and fancy ways! Hee, hee. Thank she taking you somewhere, she crazy! I aine letting her take you up there to starve. Hmph!” mama went, clicking her tongue.

Usually it got on Ludell’s nerves when mama got to preaching about Dessa, but tonight nothing could upset her. They were getting a TV, a TV, a T—VEE!