Читать книгу Emma Ever After: A feel-good romantic comedy with a hilarious modern re-telling of Jane Austen - Brigid Coady - Страница 17

Chapter Nine

‘Do we have any ice?’ Emma said, her head in the freezer in the kitchen.

‘What?’ Gee had his feet up on the battered sofa that they kept in the corner of the room.

‘Ice.’ Emma slammed the freezer shut. She was sure she’d seen some in there last week. Maybe she was imagining things. Her head was all over the shop since the meeting earlier in the week. Maybe having the party wasn’t such a great idea?

‘Johnnie and I used the last of it for Margarita Monday.’ He had his phone in his hands holding it over his face.

She hoped it dropped on him, squishing his nose.

Sometimes it was annoying to be faced with someone who had once won the vote for ‘most perfect smile’ on Sugarscape (RIP).

‘Well, go out and buy a couple of bags,’ she said. Did she have to think of everything?

If she was having this party then it was going to be perfect. Work would see what a great place she lived in. She could take her mind off the presentation she had to give next week and she could get Jamie’s mind off Rob. He had been way too excited about a small chat they’d had in the print room on Thursday. She needed to stop it now before it went any further.

Man, if she left it any longer she’d actively have to break them up. And no one wanted to do that. It wasn’t fair, it was much messier and took longer. Easier to never let it get that far.

No, it was best she diverted Jamie with Dan now. Head off all the heartbreak.

Which was why she needed ice.

Because how else could she make sure the drinks were perfect if she didn’t have ice? She needed Jamie and Dan just inebriated enough that they would fall in love.

Okay, she’d take lust for the moment. Either way, as Ogden Nash said, ‘Liquor was quicker’. Admittedly he’d been talking about icebreaking at parties but romance worked the same way.

‘Gee.’ She walked over and snatched the phone from his hand.

She could just casually drop it on him…

He looked up, his face all confused and grumpy.

The violence melted away like the ice they didn’t have. She hated that he had that effect on her when she was in the right, her annoyance was justified wasn’t it?

She wanted to scream.

‘Ice.’ She reiterated.

‘Ice?’

‘Party. Ice. Cocktails.’

‘Okay, okay…’ He was suddenly off the sofa and standing next to her, and in another movement, he’d taken back the phone.

How the hell did he do everything so stylishly? So easily? She said it out loud without realising.

‘Yoga,’ he whispered in her ear.

She shivered. It was a lie, he didn’t do yoga, and she almost called him on it. Instead she said, ‘Stop it,’ pushing him away and rubbing her ear as if it had cooties. No way did Gee need to know he could still give her goose bumps when she wasn’t expecting it.

Mind you, she thought, she’d never come clean and told him he’d been her teen idol.

‘You know what I like about you most,’ a drunk Gee had said to her on the night they finished their last exam in their first year at uni.

‘No, what?’ Emma was staring into the bottom of her plastic cup. Had she really finished another pint of beer? How many was that?

Everything felt a little fuzzy and blurred around the edges, like someone had smeared a coating of Vaseline on life.

‘You don’t care that I was in a band. Not once have you squealed or asked whether I’d snogged Johnnie.’ He patted her cheek. ‘That’s nice, that is.’

Emma looked up and tried to bring his face into focus.

He was so pretty. She shook her head and felt dizzy. No, not pretty, but beautiful. She’d always thought that ever since she’d first seen him on the TV in that reality show.

Hold on, what was he talking about?

‘You treat me like I’m Gee,’ he carried on.

‘Yeah, Gee.’ She could feel words bubbling up in her. Maybe she should tell him? That actually she had a massive crush on him, that she had done since she was sixteen and ever since they’d started uni… well, he was the only one. The only one who made her feel safe.

‘Gee,’ she began. Should she do this? She was about to throw away some of the only stability she’d had in her life but… he was worth it. Wasn’t he?

She was never going to have the guts to say it sober and as she didn’t get drunk very often because she hated feeling out of control, this was her chance,

She could do this.

‘Gee…’

‘Yeah?’ He got closer, his hand resting on her hip. She wondered whether he’d kiss like she imagined when she was sixteen.

‘Hey, Gee.’ A slight man slid between them, causing him to let her go. The strange man’s hand slid down Gee’s arm possessively. ‘Haven’t seen you since that night.’ His emphasis on ‘that night’, dripping with innuendo, had her reeling back.

Oh…

‘Hey…’ Gee furrowed his brow. ‘Erm…’

‘Andy,’ the guy purred.

‘Yeah, Andy, nice to see you mate.’ he said. ‘I’m in the middle of something.’ He manhandled the guy out of the way and looked back at Emma.

‘What were you going to say, Ems?’ He asked seriously, as if the answer was extremely important.

No, because if she told him it would be ruined. Because Gee came with complications and she would be just another fan who wanted him for who he was. If she told him things would be messy and out of control. Okay, so he made her feel as if she were flying sometimes, especially when he looked at her like she mattered, like she was worth everything. But those feelings were only fleeting highs with lows. With him she would be on a rollercoaster. Love was a series of moments that faded. But friendship… that was steady. Safe. No, it was better if she kept things as they were, told a little white lie, and kept him as a friend.

‘Johnnie was always my favourite,’ she said with what she hoped was humour, while inside it was as if all the moments that they could’ve shared as something more faded away to nothing. She grabbed the nearest drink to wash the bitterness away.

For a second he looked blank, then he smiled ruefully. His hand came up to touch her cheek before falling away.

‘How could you?’ His voice held a laugh that died quickly. ‘And he didn’t even win best celebrity smile.’

So no, Emma hadn’t ever told Gee that she’d had a whopping crush on him both before and after meeting him. That was the closest she’d ever got. And it was for the best… after all, they were still here a decade later. Friends.

She shook her memories away. It was old news. Everything was as it should be and nothing had changed. And it wouldn’t. Except they still didn’t have any ice.

‘George Knightley, move your arse and go get us some ice.’

‘Fine.’ He grabbed a hoodie and pulled it over his head.

Automatically she moved so she didn’t see the way his back lengthened and the small patch of skin that flirted at the top of his jeans. It didn’t stop her mind filling in the images, mind you.

But it wasn’t conscious these days.

Ten years of learnt behaviour. A decade of control.

Gee was on her plan, of course. How could he not be? He headed the column for best friend and potential ‘man of honour’ in the wedding.

Yeah, all completely under control.

***

‘I love your house,’ Jamie breathed as he came through the door, a few hours later.

Good, he’d come early.

Emma took a good look at him.

No. It just wouldn’t do.

‘Yes, it is a great house.’ She spun him round so she could see him from the back.

‘Eh, Emma, what exactly are you… you do know I’m gay?’ Jamie said worriedly.

‘What? Of course I do.’ How could he think she didn’t know? She had a very highly developed gaydar.

‘What I’m doing is making sure we make the most of your “assets”,’ she said as she spun him back to face her.

He sniggered.

She could feel her eyebrows rising. Did Jamie not know that this was a big deal tonight? He was going to make Dan Elton fall in love with him. And it would be as if Rob never existed.

They would become one of those cute couples like Harry Harville and Lewis Deakin, and then they would become PR power couple, she extrapolated in her head. They’d always be thankful that she had brought them together. She’d stop short of a double wedding with her faceless husband to be.

‘Don’t you mean “arse-ets”,’ Jamie giggled wiggling his eyebrows.

Emma’s plans cracked. What the… he was an idiot. She had to do this if only to save him from himself.

She watched as his smile fell when she didn’t laugh back and felt a pang. He didn’t get how important it was to have a plan which would take him places.

And, admittedly, he was a very pretty idiot.

‘Yeah, funny,’ she laughed half-heartedly. Would he buy it?

There was an uncomfortable pause as they stared at each other, Jamie biting his lip and starting to wrap his arms around himself like a pretzel.

‘Okay.’ She clapped her hands together like a demented kindergarten teacher. ‘I think we need to rethink that outfit.’ She could’ve have been less blunt with her opinion but they were operating on very little time. The party was almost about to start plus she needed to raid Gee’s wardrobe before he came back and put up some opposition.

‘But…’ he started, pulling his arms further around himself as if to stop her from ripping his clothes off.

‘No buts.’ She caught his arm and dragged him up the creaky staircase to the second floor where her room was.

She ignored the wide-eyed scared look he gave her and shoved him into the centre of the room. She stared at him appraisingly.

Well, that floral shirt needed to go. It was too fashion forward for Dan. He would be put off by anyone who looked quirky or too out there. He looked like the sort who wanted someone who was more conservative and sleek. Well-dressed but not showy.

The jeans however could stay, which was good because Jamie was a few inches taller, and a little slimmer, than Gee and she wasn’t sure his jeans would work. Besides, she didn’t have the guts to borrow Gee’s jeans. It seemed sacrilege to have someone else wearing them.

‘Hold on,’ she said, racing back down to the first floor where Gee’s room was.

Where was it? She threw herself into his wardrobe.

Why wasn’t he organised? It wasn’t messy, it was that he mixed his jeans and his shirts. Unlike his anal organisation of books downstairs.

She flicked through the hangers, clicking them back, one ear open for the front door to say that Gee was back. It wasn’t like he could tear the top off Jamie once he was wearing it, could he?

There it was! She smiled as she looked at the top she’d been looking for. He wouldn’t mind, would he? It wasn’t super expensive. Well, it wasn’t the most expensive thing in the wardrobe. Maybe the second.

Emma grabbed the long-sleeved T-shirt, which was wonderfully soft, and for a moment she remembered how it had felt to hug Gee in it, the way it fitted over his shoulders. She couldn’t stop bringing it to her nose.

Taking a deep breath in the silence, there was a noise. Was that a key in the lock? Taking the shirt from her face, she knew she was blushing even though no one had seen what she’d been doing. She took off at a run and rushed upstairs.

Bursting into her room and trying to catch her breath, she pushed the top at Jamie. ‘Put this on,’ she gasped

‘But…’ Jamie stood there letting it dangle from his hand, looking confused.

Honestly, were they letting just anyone work in PR these days? It was a shirt. Did he not get it? That you had to dress for the job you wanted. Although it might be great to express yourself exactly how you wanted, it didn’t get you places. You had to fit into the picture the way you were supposed to, otherwise you’d be overlooked.

She wondered how he’d gone through life not knowing this. Obviously, he didn’t have a life plan. She made a mental note to talk, him through that as soon as possible. Of course, she’d need to know what Dan’s plans were… okay they didn’t have time for this.

‘Jamie, the shirt you have on is lovely. Gorgeous in fact, but it doesn’t say “sophisticated” does it?’ Emma hated the hurt look that came over his face. He looked like a puppy that had been kicked. By her. Why was she the bad guy this week?

‘But it has a pussycat bow?’ His voice went high at the end.

‘Which is lovely, but I just think you should be a bit more neutral, go low key but high class.’

He looked uncertain.

‘Just try it and if you don’t feel comfortable…’ She let the sentence string out.

‘Okay.’ He flashed a smile and pulled off his shirt.

Yeah, Dan would be happy with that chest, she thought, objectively. That wasn’t a body to be wasted on Rob in Tech Dev.

‘This is very soft.’ Jamie’s voice sounded muffled. ‘But… this is Gucci. This is too expensive I can’t wear someone else’s Gucci shirt?’ He popped his head out of the top of the shirt and looked scared, patting the seams to make sure he hadn’t split them.

‘It’ll be fine. My housemate won’t mind you borrowing it,’ she lied. Because even if Gee did, he wouldn’t say anything to Jamie. Emma wondered if she could bribe him with some of that expensive peanut butter from Whole Foods, it might stop him muttering too much.

There, she thought, as she came to stand behind Jamie while he looked at himself in the mirror. Peeking over his shoulder, she smoothed the shirt down over his ribs. His curls were wild but his cheeks were flushed. He would be breaking hearts all over the house this evening, and the dark charcoal shirt looked almost as good on him as it did on Gee. Jamie didn’t quite have his breadth of shoulder but… Dan was going to be a very lucky man.

‘Ems, I’ve got the ice!’ Gee shouted up the stairs as the front door opened and then slammed.

‘Housemate?’ Jamie asked.

‘Housemate. Come on.’

He followed her downstairs, where she could hear Gee in the kitchen.

Please let him be okay about the top, she thought, as they clattered down the stairs to the kitchen.

‘I’ve put it in the freezer,’ Gee said with his back to them. ‘More ice than you can shake a stick at. Enough for you to make as many of those fancy arse cocktails as you want.’

‘Thanks,’ she said as he turned around. She twisted her fingers together hoping he wasn’t going to get pissy with her.

She knew the moment Jamie clocked who Gee was from the way he froze beside her, his muscles locking.

‘Hi, I’m Gee, the housemate,’ he said with his disarmingly charming smile, one that he’d been using on unsuspecting members of the public for years. She tensed to see if Jamie was going to parrot the usual nonsense people said when they saw Gee.

‘I’m… J… J… Jamie,’ he stuttered.

It seemed he wasn’t going to ask the usual ‘didn’t you used to be Gee Knightley?’ that everyone always asked. Jamie went up in her estimation. Maybe this would work.

‘Good to meet you, Jamie. I see Emma’s been helping you feel at home. If you’ll excuse me I’m off to get changed before everyone else arrives. Although it looks like I’ll have to find a different shirt.’

How did he wink at Jamie with one eye and seemingly glare at her with the other? Maybe he learnt that at boyband school?

‘Oh.’ Jamie looked down at his shirt. ‘Shit, man. I’m so sorry.’ He began to take it off.

‘No, you can wear it. Just give it back to Emma afterwards,’ Gee said sweetly and pulled on the hem of the shirt, so it came back down and left the kitchen.

‘Oh my god, I just almost stripped in front of Gee Knightley,’ Jamie said loudly.

‘Nothing I haven’t seen before,’ Gee called from upstairs.

Emma wondered whether Jamie was going to self-combust with the way his face glowed.