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Chapter 2

Beau sidled into the Parents Flying Solo meeting almost a week later and scanned the room. He exhaled with relief. Nancy McGuire wasn’t there.

He’d have been able to spot her halo of long, blond hair anywhere. Or her smile. Or her extremely lovely body.

Beau shook his head. He had a young, impressionable daughter to raise. His playing days had to be firmly in the past. But Nancy made him respond physically whether he wanted to or not. Worse, she challenged every brain cell he had. Contrary to his rough exterior, he read voraciously and could carry on a conversation about world politics or great philosophers as well as the next guy. He just chose not to let on most of the time.

No, it was better if he didn’t run into Nancy. A man had only so much self-control, and he, it seemed, had less than most. He had three ex-wives to prove it.

Beau absently fingered the business cards in the breast pocket of his western shirt. His reason for joining Parents Flying Solo was to network, plain and simple. If he wanted to hang on to the job that allowed him to stay in town with his daughter, he needed to keep generating more sales than the owner’s cousin.

So Beau concentrated on his personal three Ms: mix, mingle, make eye contact. “Hey, how’s it going?” He greeted a man he’d met the week prior. Chip? Trey?

They chatted for a few moments when the group leader, a balding, middle-age man, signaled for quiet. “I attended a Parents Flying Solo summit last weekend and gleaned a few tips on increasing participation. It’s been brought to my attention that some of the members are too shy to utilize the group phone list. This is an important resource during those times when you need to talk to another adult or you think you’ll lose your mind.” The leader chuckled and so did Chip or Trey or whatever his name was.

Beau found himself nodding. He sure could have used another adult to talk to when he’d first found himself the sole parental unit responsible for a teenage daughter.

“A few other groups in the region have had success with the buddy system. Each member is assigned a buddy to help him or her through the rough spots.” He picked up a basket and held it aloft. “Here are names of all our members. Pairs will be assigned randomly. I’m asking you to leave personal likes and dislikes at the door and make the buddy system a success. Each and every member has the potential for learning and teaching.”

Glancing around the room, Beau was relieved Nancy still hadn’t appeared. And a little disappointed, too. But that was the old Beau. The new Beau was all business.

Yeah, right.

The group leader pulled names from the basket. Some announcements were met with dead silence, as if Snidely Whiplash had been paired with Dudley Do-Right or worse, the lovely, innocent Nell. But nobody protested aloud.

“Beau Stanton.”

Beau glanced around and mentally catalogued the people still available. Emily Patterson hadn’t been paired yet and seemed relatively safe. Maybe he’d get her. He liked her cheerful, down-to-earth attitude. And there was an underlying layer of steel that might be helpful when dealing with Rachel. Somehow, he knew Emily could whip Rachel into shape in five minutes flat.

Shoving his hands into his pockets, he rocked back on his heels while he waited for the other slip of paper to be drawn.

“Two cookies,” a child screeched from the direction of the ladies’ restroom.

Beau was pretty sure he recognized the voice.

An adult female admonished the girl to be quiet as they exited the restroom.

He would have known that honeyed accent anywhere.

“Nancy McGuire,” the leader read from a slip of paper. “You’re buddies with our newest member, Beau Stanton.”

Beau cleared his throat. “Um, are you sure that’s right?”

The hostile glances sent in his direction would have wilted a lesser man. But Beau was a three-time loser fighting for his life. “I mean, um, my daughter’s fourteen. It might be more beneficial if I was paired with another parent of a teen.”

He could feel the crowd turning on him. They’d stoically accepted their fate, why couldn’t he accept his?

“Certainly not. Again, all members have the ability to teach and learn. Our next name is....”

The roaring in his ears drowned out most of the rest. He was aware of Nancy handing him her business card, as if he didn’t already have access to her phone number from her loan documents. As if he hadn’t copied it to his desk calendar, toying with the idea of asking her out.

He automatically withdrew a card from his pocket and handed it to her. She mouthed something about calling him later and pulled Ana, kicking and screaming, toward the door.

He was a dead man.

Beau had a vision of God somewhere above, laughing his ass off.

Nancy held Ana’s warm, little frame close to her chest and inhaled the scent of baby shampoo and freshly scrubbed little girl. Her heart did a flip-flop of joy. These were the times to be treasured.

Easing into the antique bentwood rocker, she sighed at the pure luxury of sitting. She pushed gently with her foot.

Ana snuggled close and murmured, “Mama.”

“Yes, sunshine, Mama’s here.”

She continued rocking long after Ana’s eyes had fluttered closed and her breathing slowed. Having a child was a miracle Nancy had given up on long ago.

Sighing, she rolled her neck to work out the kinks. The power struggles and tantrums would ease in a few months. Tatiana would grow out of them, she was sure. Nancy just wished she was half as sure she’d survive her first year of motherhood. Nobody had told her how all-consuming it was. And rewarding. And frustrating. And how she wouldn’t change a minute of it.

She’d joined Parents Flying Solo at the urging of Ana’s pediatrician. After two sleepless nights for both mother and daughter, and one ruptured eardrum for Ana due to an infection, Nancy had surrendered to her doubts. Would she ever get it right?

The kindly doctor had told her there were no right or wrong answers with parenting. Children, even children who weren’t adopted from a foreign country, didn’t come with instruction manuals. With the initial cultural and language barriers and the fact that Nancy was single and had no one to help pick up the slack, she had been severely in danger of burnout. And what would have happened to Tatiana then?

That’s how he’d convinced her to join the support group for single parents. For Ana, not for herself.

But then she’d met Emily and a few other parents and she’d enjoyed talking with people who understood what she was going through. No one seemed to look down on her because she, a single woman, had chosen to adopt a child and now was experiencing the trials that went with it.

It was a much different scenario from some of the people back home in McGuireville, Arkansas. Many of those had made veiled comments about her suitability as a parent. As if having a man in the house would guarantee a bright, normal, carefree childhood for Ana. She’d be willing to bet those narrow-minded folks would feel she deserved to struggle in her new role as a mother.

So how to handle her new parenting buddy? Her concentration had been so focused on getting Ana outside before a full-blown tantrum, she’d barely heard her name and the fact she’d been paired with Beau Stanton. She’d only had time to fling her business card in Beau’s direction, accept his card and leave.

As she placed Ana in her crib, the phone rang.

It was Beau.

His accent brought memories of another man, another place. And a sense of loss so intense she sucked in a breath. No, she couldn’t allow memories of Eric to somehow get tangled up with Beau, urging her to rewrite history by trying to get another restless man to change.

Beau’s words seeped through her distraction. “I’m quitting.”

“You’re dropping out of the group?” Her voice was shrill.

“I’ve given it some thought. I, um, joined the group under false pretenses and it wouldn’t be fair for me to be a buddy to anyone.”

Just as she’d suspected. Beau was a lying, cheating charmer, just like Eric. Her voice was cool when she said, “Oh, and what false pretenses would those be?” A wife at home?

“Um, well, I figured it would be a good way to meet people.”

“There are bars and singles groups for that.”

“No, not that way. Lord, no.” His voice held a convincing note of horror. “It seemed like a good way for the new guy in town to drum up business leads.”

Nancy couldn’t help but chuckle. “If that’s the case, I joined under false pretenses, too. I only went because Ana’s pediatrician suggested it. I did it for Ana, not me. And I have to admit, I always make sure I have plenty of business cards in my purse before I leave for the meeting. Hey, it’s a reality of sales.”

“But you see why it’s not a good idea for us to be buddies?”

The man was giving her an out. So why didn’t she pounce on it? Because she was afraid her unofficial buddy, Emily, might not have as much time for her now that Emily had an official buddy. And that made her feel terribly alone. “I appreciate you being honest with me. The brochure says honesty and trust are the key components to a successful buddy friendship.”

“But it doesn’t say how often we have to talk.” He hesitated. “Maybe we could ease into this whole thing?”

Nancy smiled. She’d had several impressions of Beau and easing into things wasn’t one of them. The man jumped into life without worrying about consequences. “Yes, we can ease into it. We don’t even have to see each other face-to-face except for meetings.”

She could hear the relief in his tone, when he said, “Yeah, that’s right. We just call each other once in a while, no big deal.”

“No big deal.”

Nancy was still smiling after he ended the call. Beau Stanton was afraid of her. The thought lifted her most pressing doubt about him. He wasn’t about to try to seduce her. As a matter of fact, he seemed to prefer not to be anywhere near her.

Shaking her head, she realized her analysis of him remained sound—Beau would definitely be bad news in the romance department. But since she seemed to scare the heck out of the man, it wasn’t a problem.

Nancy led Ana by the hand. “You’ll get to play with the other kids. It’ll be fun.”

They entered the Parents Flying Solo meeting and Ana made a beeline for the toys. As usual, children were everywhere. It was one of the things she liked about the group. Children were always welcome at the meetings. Otherwise, she might have hesitated to take the time away from Ana.

The group was small enough, though, that she could keep an eye on her daughter as she joined some little friends.

“There you are,” Emily said. “I’ve been waiting for you.”

Curiosity shone in her friend’s eyes. “So dish. How’s your buddy?”

“Beau is fine. We’ve decided to be phone friends.”

“Oh.” Emily sounded disappointed.

“What did you expect? Wedding bells? Fireworks?”

“I was hoping you’d had great sex. Since I don’t get any, I figured I could live vicariously through you.”

“I’m not sure I’ll ever trust enough for that kind of intimacy again, so you’d better live vicariously through someone else.”

Emily patted Nancy’s arm. “I have confidence in you. I took a vow of celibacy after Jason was born.” She winked. “And you see how well that worked.”

Jason was Emily’s oldest, followed a year later by Jeremy, with a gap of several years before two little ones stair-stepped behind him.

Nancy frowned. “I mean it though.”

“Ah, yes, the widow in mourning. I know you too well, Nancy McGuire. I know for a fact there’s a part of you that would dance on your husband’s grave.”

Fanning herself with a napkin, Nancy deepened her accent to Gone With the Wind proportions. “Ah’m shocked. Genteel Southern ladies do not dance on their husbands’ graves.” Nancy chuckled. “At least not while anyone’s looking.”

“I’ll second that.”

Nancy turned to see Beau approach. He looked amazing. His smile was wide and infectious, his hair slightly damp from a shower. She inhaled. And he smelled absolutely wonderful. Some sort of subtle aftershave with a hint of danger.

Emily nudged her with her elbow.

Yikes! She’d been caught staring. Emily would never let her hear the end of it. There was absolutely no reason she couldn’t have a good-looking male friend, Nancy reasoned. Shoot, she could pretend he was gay.

Except for the testosterone that seemed to ooze out every pore.

He said, “Family legend has it that my great-aunt Charlene poisoned her husband, and every full moon she tiptoed out to the family cemetery and waltzed on his grave. Or did the Lindy or whatever dance they did.”

Nancy pursed her lips. “And your point is?”

“Great-Aunt Charlene would have been drummed out of polite society if she’d danced on his grave during daylight hours. But at night, well, that was a different matter. My grandpa always said what went on after dark was nobody’s business.”

“Hmm, I’m pretty sure I married into the same family. Your grandfather’s name wasn’t McGuire, was it?”

“Nope. He was a Stanton.”

Nancy waited for the overwhelming sense of betrayal she normally felt when recalling her late husband. When it didn’t come, she murmured, “That’s the first time I’ve been able to laugh about Eric. I do believe you two helped me reach a milestone today.” Raising her plastic cup of soda, she toasted, “To friends.”

Emily smiled. She knew the whole story and undoubtedly realized what an important step this was for Nancy. She raised her cup and touched it to Nancy’s. “To friends.”

They both turned to Beau and waited. He looked like he didn’t feel well. “To friends,” he added weakly. Then he turned and strode from the meeting room.

Emily shrugged. “Must’ve needed some air.”

“Must have.” Nancy thought of following him, but decided against it. When he hadn’t returned ten minutes later, she knew she had to do something. What if he was ill?

After making sure Ana was with Jason, Nancy worked her way to the door. She hoped Emily wouldn’t notice; her vivid imagination would be off and running.

Crisp air and a hint of snow tickled her nose as she went out to the garden. She didn’t see Beau anywhere. But as her eyes adjusted to the dusk, she located him seated on a bench in the butterfly garden.

His shoulders hunched, he was staring off into the forest beyond the property.

Stepping close, she tentatively touched his shoulder. “Hey, is everything okay?”

“Um, yeah.” His voice was husky.

Nancy missed his ready smile. This new, somber Beau was an enigma. “The meeting’s started.”

“I’ll be there in a minute.” Yet he appeared welded to the bench.

Nancy sat next to him. It was a small bench, so she clung to the edge.

“Did I say something to offend you?” she asked.

“Offend me?” He glanced up. “No, why’d you get that idea?”

“Because you left so suddenly. I know some people don’t always appreciate my humor.”

“No, I enjoy talking to you. Your sense of humor is a little screwy, but I can handle that.”

“What, then? Something happened. Is it Rachel? Is she in trouble again?”

He sighed heavily. “It seems like Rachel’s always grounded, but this time it had nothing to do with her. All of sudden, I could visualize each of my three ex-wives dancing on my grave.”

Nancy felt her jaw drop open. “Three.”

“Uh-huh.” He nodded glumly. “I saw myself through their eyes and it wasn’t pretty.”

Shaking her head to clear it, she contemplated the number of failed marriages Beau had put behind him. Three. In her book, that made him nearly as bad as a bigamist.

Nancy swallowed hard. She’d been there, done that and bought the T-shirt. There was no way in Hades she’d ever get on that merry-go-round again.