Читать книгу All or Nothing - Catherine Mann - Страница 9

With Jayne’s agonized confession echoing in his ears and resonating deep in his gut, holding himself still was the toughest thing Conrad had ever done—other than letting Jayne go the day she’d walked out on their marriage. But he needed to think this through, and fast. One wrong move and this confrontation could blow up in his face.

Every cell in his body shouted for him to scoop her out of that leather chair, take her to his room and make love to her all night long. Hell, all weekend long. And he would have—if he believed she would actually follow through on that wish to have sex.

But he could read Jayne too clearly. While she desired him, she was still pissed off. She would change her mind about sleeping with him before he finished pulling the pins from her pale blond hair. He needed more time to wipe away her reservations and persuade her that sleeping together one last time was a good thing.

Pulling back his hand, he grabbed the bottle instead and poured another drink. “As I recall, I didn’t ask you to have sex with me.”

If she sat any straighter in that seat, her spine would snap. “You don’t have to say the words. Your eyes seduce me with a look.” Her chin quivered. “My eyes betray me, because when I look at you … I want you. So much.”

Okay, maybe he could be persuaded not to wait after all. “Why is that a bad thing?”

A clear battle waged in her light blue eyes that he understood quite well. The past three years apart had been a unique kind of hell for him, but eventually he’d accepted that their marriage was over. He just refused to end it via a courier.

Call him stubborn, but he’d wanted Jayne to look him in the face when she called it quits. Well, he’d gotten his wish—only to have her throw him a serious curveball. She still wanted him every bit as much as he wanted her.

Granted, sex between them had always been more than good, even when they’d used it to distract them from their latest argument. One last weekend together would offer the ultimate distraction. They could cleanse away the gnawing hunger and move on. He just had to persuade her to his way of thinking

The battle continued in her eyes until, finally, she shook her head, a strand of blond hair sliding loose. “You’re not going to win. Not this time.” Standing, she demanded, “Give me my clothes back, and don’t you dare tell me to go into our old bedroom to get them myself.”

He’d been right to wait, to play it cool for now. “They’re already in the guest room.”

Her mouth dropped open in surprise. “Oh, I’m sorry for thinking the worst of you.”

He shrugged. “Most of the time you would be right.”

“Damn it, Conrad,” she said softly, her shoulders lowering, her face softening, “I don’t want to feel bad for you, not now. I just want your signature and peace.”

“All I ever wanted was to make you happy.” Tonight might not be the right time to indulge in tantric sex, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t start lobbying. He shoved to his feet, stepped closer and reached out to stroke that loose lock of hair. “Jayne, I didn’t ask you to have sex, but make no mistake, I think about being with you and how damn great we were together.”

Teasing the familiar texture of her hair between his fingers, he brushed back the strand, his knuckles grazing her shoulder as he tugged free the pin still hanging on. Her pupils went wide with awareness and a surge of victory pumped through him. He knew the unique swirl of her tousled updo so well he could pull the pins out of it blindfolded.

He stepped aside. “Sleep well, Jayne.”

Her hands shook as she swept back the loose strand, but she didn’t say a word. She spun away on her high heels and snagged her purse from the wine rack before making tracks toward the spare room. He had a feeling peace wasn’t in the cards for either of them anytime soon.

Jayne closed the guest-room door behind her and sagged back, wrapping her arms around herself in a death grip to keep from throwing herself at Conrad. After three long years without him, she hadn’t expected her need for him to be this strong. Her mind filled with fantasies of leaning over him as he sat in that monstrously big chair, of sliding her knees up on either side until she straddled his lap.

There was something intensely stirring about the times she’d taken charge of him, a scenario she’d half forgotten in their time apart. But she loved that feeling of sensual power. Sure, he could turn the tables in a heartbeat—a gleam in his eyes would make that clear—but then she would tug his tie free, unbutton his shirt, his pants …

She slid down the door to sit on the floor. A sigh burst free. This wasn’t as easy as she’d expected.

At least she had a bed to herself without arguing, a minor victory. She looked around at the “tomato-red room” as Conrad had called it. He’d left this space unchanged and the relief she felt over such a minor point surprised her. Why did it mean so much to her that he hadn’t tossed out everything from their old life?

Shoving back up to her feet, she tapped a vintage bench used as a luggage rack and skimmed her fingers along the carved footboard. He’d even kept the red toile spread and curtains. She’d wanted a comfortable space for their family to visit. Except Conrad and his older sister only exchanged birthday and Christmas cards. Since his parents and her mother had passed away, that didn’t leave many relatives. Jayne definitely hadn’t invited her father and his new wife …

Had she let some deep-seated “daddy issues” lead her to choose a man destined to break her heart? That was not the first time the thought had occurred to her—okay, how could she dodge the possibility when Conrad had tossed it in her face at least a dozen times? She’d forgotten how he had a knack for catching her unaware, like how he’d sent her clothes here rather than demanding she sleep in their old room.

Like the way he’d tugged the pin from her hair.

Her mind had been so full of images of them together, and she’d actually admitted how much she still wanted him. Yet, he’d turned her down even though it was clear from his eyes, from his touch—from his arousal—how much he wanted her, too. She knew his body as well as her own, but God, would she ever understand the man?

She tossed her purse on the bed and her cell phone slid out. She snatched it up only to find the screen showed three missed calls from the same number.

Guilt soured in her stomach, and how twisted was that? She wasn’t actually dating Anthony Collins. She’d been careful to keep things in the “friend” realm since she’d begun Hospice care for his aged great-uncle who’d recently passed away from end stage lung cancer.

She’d seen a lot of death in her job, and it was never easy. But knowing she’d helped ease a person’s final days, had helped their families as well, she could never go back to filling her time with buying furniture and planning meals. She didn’t even want to return to working in an E.R.

She’d found her niche for her nursing degree.

While there were others who could cover her rounds at work, she wanted to resume the life she’d started building for herself in Miami. And to do that, she needed closure for her marriage.

She thumbed the voice mail feature and listened …

“Jayne, just checking in …” Anthony’s familiar voice piped through with the sound of her French bulldog, Mimi, barking in the background since he’d agreed to dog sit for her. “How did your flight go? Call me when you get a chance.”

Beep. Next message.

“I’m getting worried about you. Hope you’re not stranded from a layover, at the mercy of overpriced airport food.”

Beep. Next call from Anthony, he hung up without speaking.

She should phone him back. Should. But she couldn’t listen to his voice, not with desire for Conrad still so hot and fresh in her veins. She took the coward’s way out and opted for a text message instead.

Made it 2 Monte Carlo safely. Thanks 4 worrying. 2 tired to talk. Will call later. Give Mimi an extra treat from me.

More of that remorse still churning, she hit Send and turned off the power. Big-time coward. She pitched her phone back in her purse. The clink as her cell hit metal reminded her of the ring Conrad had slipped back inside. She’d won a battle by delivering the divorce papers, and she could think of plenty of charities that would benefit from a donation if—when—she sold the ring.

She may not have gotten to place her bet, but she’d won tonight. Right?

Wrong. She sagged onto the edge of the bed and stared at her monogrammed carry-on bag. Good thing she’d packed her ereader, because there wasn’t a chance in hell she would be sleeping.

Parked on the glassed-in portion of his balcony, Conrad thumbed through the Zhutov document on his tablet computer.

Monte Carlo rarely slept at night anyhow, the perfect setting for a chronic insomniac like himself. Beyond the windows, yachts bobbed in the bay, lights glowing. No doubt the casino below him was still in full swing, but he’d soundproofed his quarters.

The divorce papers lay beside him on the twisted iron breakfast table. He’d already reviewed them and found them every bit as frustrating as when his lawyer had relayed the details. And yes, he knew the contents even though he’d led Jayne to believe otherwise.

She was insistent on walking away with next to nothing, just as she’d done the day she’d left. He’d already drawn up an addendum that created a trust for her, and she could do whatever the hell she wanted with the money. But he’d vowed in front of God and his peers to protect this woman for life, and he would follow through on that promise even beyond their divorce.

He hadn’t made that commitment lightly.

Frustration simmered inside him, threatening his focus as he read the Zhutov report from Salvatore. He’d given up his marriage for cases like this, so he’d damn well better succeed or he would have lost Jayne for nothing.

The world was better off with that bastard behind bars. Zhutov had masterminded one of the largest counterfeiting organizations in Eurasia. He’d used that influence to shift the balance of power between countries by manipulating the strength of a country’s currency. At a time when many regions were struggling for financial survival, the least dip in economics could be devastating.

And from all appearances, Zhutov had played his tricks out of an amoral need for power and a desire to advance his son’s political aspirations by any means possible.

Helping Interpol stop crooks like that was more than a job. It was a road to redemption after what Conrad had done in high school. He’d committed a crime not all that different from Zhutov’s and gotten off with a slap on the wrist. At the time he’d manipulated the stock market, he’d deluded himself into thinking he was some sort of dispenser of cosmic justice, stealing from the evil rich to give to the more deserving.

Utter crap.

At fifteen, he’d been old enough to know better. He’d understood the difference between right and wrong. But he’d been so caught up in his own selfish need to prove he was better than his crook of a father, he’d failed to take into account the workers and the families hurt in the process.

He might have avoided official prison time, but he still owed a debt. When Salvatore had retired as headmaster of North Carolina Military Prep and taken a job with Interpol, Conrad had been one of his first recruits. He’d worked a case cracking open an international insider trading scam.

The sound of the balcony door opening drew him back to the moment. He didn’t have to turn around. Jayne’s scent already drifted toward him. Her seabreeze freshness, a natural air, brought the outdoors inside. She’d told him once she’d gotten out of the practice of wearing perfume as a nurse because scents disturbed some patients. And yes, he remembered most everything about her, such as how she usually slept like a log regardless of the time zone.

That she was restless now equaled progress. It was already past 2:00 a.m.

He shut down the file and switched to a computer game, still keeping his back to her.

“Conrad?” Her husky voice stoked his frustration higher, hotter. “What are you doing up so late?”

“Business.” The screen flashed with a burst of gunfire as his avatar fought back an ambush in Alpha Realms IV.

She laughed softly, stepping farther onto the balcony silently other than the swoosh of her silky robe against her legs. “So I see. New toy from your pal Troy Donavan?”

Conrad had the inside track on video games since a fellow felonious high school bud of his now ran a lucrative computer software corporation. “It’s my downtime, and I don’t even have to leave town. Did you need something?”

“I was getting a glass of water, and I saw you’re still awake. You always were a night owl.”

More than once she’d walked up behind him, slid her arms around his neck and offered to help him relax with a massage that always led to more.

“Feel free to have a seat.” He guided his avatar around a corner in dystopian city ruins. “But I can’t promise to be much of a conversationalist.”

“Keep playing your game.”

“Hmm …” Alpha Realms provided a safe distraction from the peripheral view of Jayne sliding onto the lounger. The way the silky robe clung to her shower-damp skin, she could have been naked.

Her legs crossed at the ankles, her fuzzy slippers dangling from her toes. “Why do you keep working when you could clearly retire?”

Because his fast-paced, wealthy lifestyle provided the perfect cover for him to move in the circles necessary to bring down crooks like Zhutov. “You knew I lived at the office when you married me.”

“I was like any woman crazy in love.” She cupped a water glass between her hands. “I deluded myself into believing I could change you.”

He hadn’t expected her to concede anything, much less that. He set aside his tablet, on top of those damn divorce papers. “I remember the first time I saw you.”

The patio sconce highlighted her smile. “You were one of the crankiest, most uncooperative emergency room patients I’d ever met.”

He’d been in Miami following up on a lead for Salvatore. Nothing hairy, just chasing a paper trail. He would have been back in Monte Carlo by morning, except a baggage handler at the airport dropped an overweight case on Conrad’s foot. Unable to bear weight on it even when he’d tried to grit through the pain, he’d ended up in the E.R. rather than on his charter jet. And he’d still protested the entire way.

Although his mood had taken a turn for the better once the head nurse on the night shift stepped into the waiting room to find out why he’d sent everyone else running. “I’m surprised you spoke to me after what an uncooperative bastard I was.”

“I still can’t believe you insisted you just wanted a walking boot, that you had an important meeting you couldn’t miss because of what you called a stubbed toe.”

“Yeah, not my shining moment.”

“Smart move sending flowers to the staff members you pissed off.” She scratched the corner of her mouth with her pinky. “I don’t believe I ever told you, but I thought they were for me when they arrived.”

“I wanted to win you over. Apologizing to your coworkers seemed the wisest course to take.” He’d extended his stay in Miami under the guise of looking into investment property.

They’d eloped three months later, in a simple ocean-side ceremony with a couple of his alumni buddies as witnesses.

Jayne sipped her water, her eyes unblinking as if she might be holding back tears. “So this is really it for us.”

“Nice to know this isn’t any easier for you than it is for me.”

Her hand shook as she set aside her glass. “Of course this isn’t easy for me. But I want it to be done. I want to move past this and be happy again.”

Damn, it really got under his skin that he still hurt her even after all this time apart.

“I’m sorry you’re unhappy.” Back when, he would have moved heaven and earth to give her what she wanted. Now it appeared all he could give her was a divorce.

“Do you really mean that?” She swung her feet to the side, sitting on the edge of the lounger. “Or is that why you held off signing the papers for so long? So you could see me squirm?”

“Honest to God, Jayne, I just want both of us to be happy, and if that means moving on, then okay.” Although she looked so damn right beside him, back in his life again. He would be haunted by the vision of her there for a long time to come. “But right now, neither of us seems to be having much luck with the concept of a clean break.”

“What are you saying?”

Persuading her would take a lot more savvy than sending a few dozen roses to her friends. “I think we need to take a couple of days to find that middle ground, peace or closure or whatever the hell therapists are calling it lately.”

“We’ve been married for seven years.” She fished into the pocket of her robe and pulled out her engagement ring and wedding band set. “How do you expect to find closure in two days when we’ve been trying for the last three years?”

He did not want to see those damn rings again. Not unless they were sitting where he’d put them—on her finger.

“Has ignoring each other worked for you? Because even living an ocean apart hasn’t gone so well for me.”

“You’ll get no argument from me.” Her fingers closed around the rings. “What exactly do you have in mind?”

He sensed victory within his sights. She was coming around to his way of thinking. But he had to be sure because if he miscalculated and moved too soon he could risk sending her running.

“I suggest we spend a simple night out together, no pressure. My old high school buddy Malcolm Douglas is performing nearby—in the Côte d’Azur—tomorrow night. I have tickets. Go with me.”

“What if I say no?”

Not an option. He played his trump card. “Do you want my signature on those divorce papers?”

She dropped her rings on top of the computer that just happened to be resting over the divorce papers. “Are you blackmailing me?”

“Call it a trade.” He rested his hand over the five-carat diamond he’d chosen for her, only her. “You give me two days and I’ll give you the divorce papers. Signed.”

“Just two days?” She studied him through narrowed, suspicious eyes.

He gathered up the rings and pressed them to her palm, closing her fingers over them again. “Forty-eight hours.”

Forty-eight hours to romance her back into his bed one last time.