Читать книгу The Secret Between Them - Cathryn Parry - Страница 12
ОглавлениеKYLE HAD A long list of plans for his new life. Before the first week was out, he gave notice to his landlord and packed up what few clothes and personal items he’d accumulated.
He also announced his intention to close out his Maryland employment commitments. Nobody in his office was surprised, least of all his manager. He asked Kyle where he planned to go, and Kyle replied, “Home.”
The Wallis Point Twin Rinks had always been Kyle’s real home. And now he was so close to running it that he could taste the excitement in his mouth—he could barely wait.
By the time he drove back to New Hampshire—seven-plus hours of motoring northeast up turnpikes surrounded by darkness—he still had another ten days before his Monday morning meeting with Natalie. Then he would finally have the keys to the rink pressed into his hands. He wasn’t ever letting them go.
Antsy, impatient, he aimed for the rinks, rather than 18 Linden Lane, his childhood home, to crash in his old bed. He wasn’t eager to check out how Joe had changed the digs. Even in the zero-dark-hundred hours, he was reminded that the terrain on this side of town looked different from when he’d lived here.
The road had been widened to accommodate more local traffic. They’d squeezed in a new convenience store between the old pizzeria and the landscape and gardening center. And, they’d put up a traffic light.
But the strangeness disappeared when Kyle turned into the twin rinks’ lot. Security beacons illuminated the familiar concrete building with the low, flat roof. The parking spaces were freshly plowed—a good first sign that things were being taken care of.
Eager to do some interior reconnoitering, Kyle scanned for the handicap spaces. He was grateful for the installed ramp that ran the length of the building leading to the glassed-in entranceway. It meant that Kyle could avoid the awkwardness of using the stairs. He’d spent much time practicing climbing stairs in rehab, but he hadn’t completely rid himself of the limp, and occasionally he still had a slip.
He didn’t want to slip—and definitely not fall—in front of Jessica. Just the thought made his heart stop in his chest.
Jessica would be present during the rink walk-through and key exchange with Natalie. No way could Kyle risk her seeing him having any difficulties getting around.
Long ago, he’d decided he’d let no civilian form prejudices against him based on his being weak. That went double for Jessica, or anyone else he worked with.
He parked in the closest unmarked spot beside the ten handicapped spaces, and then hoofed it as fast he dared along the barely lit, shoveled-and-sanded ramp that led to the front doors.
Once there, he blew on his bare hands in the cold, frosty, dark morning and cupped them between his face and the glass.
He couldn’t see anything inside. And the entrance doors were both locked and chained. Still, he was home. One step closer in a long and winding journey that was fast closing in a circle, bringing him back to the place he’d started.
Older and, hopefully, wiser.
* * *
JESSICA ROARED INTO the parking lot of the Wallis Point Twin Rinks with a well-thought-out action plan in mind: Tell Kyle the truth so we can survive these six months together without feeling guilty all the time.
She had to tell him—her conscience was bothering her. Her past mistake was tormenting her thoughts, keeping her up at night and driving a new, uncomfortable rift between her and Sebastien because of her refusal to discuss it with him.
And her guilt had only gotten worse since reading Joe’s letter.
Her neck muscles tightened as she faced the familiar building. Gripping the steering wheel, she aimed toward the only two cars in the lot, on the farthest edge beside the handicapped spaces. As a physical therapist, she appreciated these aids for people who needed them, like her clients. She slowed to a stop and parked beside what she assumed was Kyle’s big, black pickup truck with the Maryland plates.
Her little orange Volkswagen seemed so beat-up and old beside the hulking, gleaming monster. Her car was used. Ten years old, with over two hundred thousand miles on the odometer. It broke down all the time, and on cold days it didn’t always start. Like today.
Outside, she secured her tote bag across her shoulder and wrapped her scarf more tightly around her neck. She was freezing. Worse than that, dread swirled in the pit of her stomach.
She pulled open the double glass doors to the rink lobby. Kyle stood there, big and gruff, wearing a poker face. He didn’t meet her eyes—not good.
She swallowed, focusing on Natalie, all dressed up in a long wool coat and high-heeled boots, with a smart skirt-suit beneath it. Very lawyerly looking.
But it was the sleepy child in Natalie’s arms that made Jessica truly relax.
“Aren’t you a sweetie?” Jessica smiled at the toddler, bundled into a pink snowsuit and wearing cute boots with princess decals.
“Sorry I had to bring Hannah along to the walk-through.” Natalie shifted the child to her other hip. “I’m dropping her off at my mother’s house before I head into court this morning, but seven o’clock was a bit early, even for Mom to take her.”
Kyle glanced at his watch. Jessica knew she was twenty minutes late. Her cranky car had needed a jump start from her neighbor.
“I’m sorry I couldn’t be here on time,” she said.
“That’s all right.” Natalie pulled out a huge key ring, with what seemed like dozens of keys on it, and handed it to Kyle. “How about if you do the honors, Kyle? We’ll head into the receptionist’s office and I’ll get you both started with the paperwork.”
Kyle froze for a moment, staring at the keys in his hands as if he couldn’t quite believe he was holding them. He was in awe, like a kid at Christmas.
Another reminder of how sad it was that she’d been responsible for unfairly poisoning Joe toward Kyle. Jessica dipped her chin inside her wool scarf, her heart sinking.
“Hi!” the toddler suddenly said. “Who are you?”
Jessica glanced up. The toddler was speaking to her.
“I’m Jessica. And you’re Hannah, right?”
“Hi, Jessica.”
She smiled at little Hannah. As she followed Natalie into the rink, Hannah grinned at Jessica from her position over her mom’s shoulder. Jessica winked at her, and the toddler giggled, her chubby fingers over small pink lips. Sweet.
Once they were in the office, Jessica found it helpful to watch Hannah while Natalie gave them the rules of the road, so to speak.
“Even though I’ve passed over a set of keys to Kyle,” Natalie said, “I have the master set in my office because, technically, I’m acting as executor until the terms of the agreement are fulfilled. I’ve made up sign-in sheets for both of you to record your hours.” Natalie leaned over, reaching into her bag for a blue notebook, and in doing so she set Hannah on her feet.
“Do you mind if I hold her?” Jessica asked.
Natalie straightened, glancing first at her daughter and then Jessica. “Sure, go ahead.”
Jessica lifted Hannah into her arms. The child was heavier than she looked. Immediately, she reached for Jessica’s necklace, which was swinging free over Jessica’s turtleneck.
“I wear this?” Hannah asked, holding the pendant between thumb and forefinger.
“Hannah, we don’t ask people for their things,” Natalie said gently to her daughter.
Jessica laughed. “It’s just an abalone shell I picked up at a crafts fair.” A yard sale, actually. And the shell was encased in sterling silver, which Jessica had cleaned and polished. “Of course, honey, I’ll let you try it on if you’d like.”
Hannah put her chubby arms around Jessica’s neck and buried her cheek inside Jessica’s unzipped jacket.
Jessica lowered her nose to Hannah’s wispy-fine curls. She smelled like talc and baby shampoo. It was the most comforting, heartwarming scent she could imagine.
The room turned quiet. Jessica glanced up and noticed Kyle staring at her with a strange look on his face. Natalie just seemed pensive.
Natalie cleared her throat. “Kyle, why don’t you sign yourself and Jessica in, since she has her hands full?” She turned to Jessica. “Every time you come in, I’ll need you each to clock in and out on this sheet. We’ll leave it on the honor system. Don’t worry, I trust you—the paperwork is for your safety, in case anyone ever challenges that you kept to your bargain. It will be proof you were here when you said you were. Then, every few weeks, I’ll come and pick it up. I need to file a report with the court every month as part of the trusteeship, and we want to make sure our records are unimpeachable. Does that sound all right to you both?”
“Fine,” Kyle gritted out.
“Great,” Jessica said, smoothing Hannah’s curls.
“I’d like to see the rest of the rink,” Kyle said. His gaze was looking everywhere around the office except at Jessica and Hannah. Up at the ceiling. Down at the floor. Studying the faded Formica countertops.
“Well, I do need to warn you again,” Natalie said, picking up her bag. “Since the facility was partially shut down during Joe’s illness, it’s in rough shape.”
“That’s okay,” Kyle said gruffly. “I’ll fix it.”
Jessica had no doubt that he would. She gently rocked the toddler in her arms, which helped Jessica stay calm. Except for the present conversation, she’d barely noticed she was back in the rink she’d sworn never to set foot inside again. She’d been dreading this day since the meeting in Natalie’s office.
If she could keep Hannah with her every day for six months, she might be okay. She laughed softly to herself. Yeah, Natalie would love that, she thought, shaking her head at her silliness.
“I’m not going to sugarcoat it,” Natalie was saying. “As I understand it from the assessors, the rink is in crisis. Much of the old machinery is falling apart. The second Zamboni isn’t working. The compressor in the big rink is on the fritz. That’s a direct quote from Joe. The small rink—the figure-skating rink—isn’t working at all...”
Jessica tried to tune out what Natalie was saying. She had no intention of having anything to do with any of it. She thought she was doing pretty damn great as it was. She felt calm, no longer filled with anxiety and guilt. Hannah quietly played with Jessica’s abalone pendant, chattering to it in sweet toddler talk, distracting Jessica and settling her nerves.
“...in addition, two of the toilets are inoperative and one of the sinks is cracked. A plumber needs to be consulted.”
“I’ll do it,” Kyle said in his quiet, authoritative voice. “I’ll fix all the equipment.”
He actually seemed happy about the challenge, and it was the one thing about this whole scenario that Jessica was grateful for—that Kyle was happy. It helped ease her guilt. Somewhat. She still needed to talk to him about her letter. To get it off her chest...
Natalie unlocked a door beside the desk clerk’s counter, and a musty odor filled the room. Jessica wrinkled her nose.
“The place just needs a good, deep cleaning,” Kyle said, not to Jessica but to Natalie, who was standing stoically by. “I washed this place from top to bottom every season as a kid.”
Jessica remembered that. The rink used to shut down for a week in June. One time she’d been inside with her mother, meeting with Joe, and she’d noticed that Kyle had seemed to be assigned a lot of the messy janitorial duties. Painting, cleaning rubber matting, disinfecting the locker rooms, shining exterior windows...
“I’ll take care of it,” he repeated.
Jessica swallowed. Her guilt was kicking in again.
“Why don’t we take that walk-through?” Natalie suggested, glancing at her watch. “I have about ten minutes before I have to leave if I want to make it in time for court.”
Jessica’s heart sped up. She had no intention of venturing past this entry area, certainly not into the heart of the rink with the ice surfaces or locker rooms.
She hugged Hannah, but the toddler squirmed and Jessica set her down on her feet.
Jessica glanced through the glass doors and across the hallway. Joe’s old office was located there, and it was where Jessica planned to stake out her thirty hours per week for the next twenty weeks or so. That was their agreement, and she was sticking to it.
“I’ll stay here, in Joe’s old office and watch your little girl for you,” she said to Natalie.
“Are you okay?” Natalie asked, peering into her face.
Jessica nodded, glancing away. Once she’d been prone to panic attacks, and she well knew how they started. Flushed cheeks. Rapid breathing. Fixation on an unwanted result.
“I’m fine,” she insisted, more to herself than to Natalie. She opened the glass door and prepared to head out to the hallway again. “Where’s the key to Joe’s old office?” she asked, turning...
And as she turned, she saw a bare, rectangular spot of faded paint on the old concrete wall above the double doors that led to the twin rinks.
The office door closed behind her. Jessica froze, alone in the hallway, staring at the wall above the double doors. This was where her poster-sized portrait had been. Her smiling image had greeted everyone who’d entered the Wallis Point Twin Rinks during all the years she’d trained here.
The office door clicked open and shut behind her, and she heard the heaviness of Kyle’s work boots on the rubber matting beside her.
From the corner of her eye, she saw him gazing at the empty spot, too, and then at her. He’d worked and played at the rink during the same time she had. He would remember that poster. He would be thinking exactly what she was thinking, except that he wouldn’t know that her smiling face had been a lie.
He exhaled, darting a glance her way. Maybe he did suspect she’d been lying back then. Sometimes the way he used to meet her eyes when they’d had a rare moment alone had made her wonder what he thought. But he’d never said a word about any suspicions he might have had regarding her real feelings. He’d made kind gestures—a small favor here or there, a cup of coffee or a kind look. Actions, but not words.
That’s who Kyle was—the strong and silent type. He didn’t avoid unpleasant situations, as Sebastien tended to, but he didn’t dwell on things, either.
She turned her back on the rectangle of faded paint, breathed slowly in and out. Focused her attention on the lobby floor. On the peeling rubber mats that had seen better days. The dirty, scuffed interior walls and a limp plant, dead in its pot.
She felt a gentle pressure on her shoulder, a comforting human touch.
Kyle. She wasn’t prepared for him to touch her—he’d barely glanced at her all morning—but when she looked into his face, she saw understanding, the gaze of someone who’d known and remembered her.
In all the years of their awkward teen acquaintance, she’d never been physically close to him before. They’d never touched skin.
She reached across her chest and pressed the back of his knuckles with the palm of her hand. She meant it as a thank-you, but the shock of his heat and strength struck her at once.
Her heart made a trembling pitter-patter in her chest.
“It will be okay,” he murmured.
Her breathing sounded loud, even to her. “I hope so.” She stared at the glass doors that led to the twin rinks. “I don’t ever want to go inside those rinks again, Kyle, so I hope you don’t expect me to.”
Kyle’s eyes were green and earnest, as if making her a promise. “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do, Jessica. I’ll protect you from all of that.”
As opposed to Sebastien, who’d made her agree to things that she didn’t want to do, just to keep their future on track.
Jessica glanced away. Her mother had never cared about Jessica doing what she wanted, either. Hedley Jackson had been all about the long view. “Day-to-day discipline,” she’d insisted to Jessica. “Be practical in your choices.” Everything her mother had achieved in her own star-studded figure-skating career had come from dedication, denial and hard work. She’d expected the same of her only child.
“I appreciate your saying that,” Jessica said to Kyle. She tried to laugh, but it came out as a choke.
“I remember how hard it was for you.” Kyle’s face darkened. “But these are new days. I meant what I said back in the lawyer’s office.”
Partners, he’d said.
She nodded, swallowing. She should take her hand off his now. If Sebastien suddenly walked into the rink and saw them, it would look disloyal of her. But she knew what Kyle was doing. He wasn’t trying to seduce her but to reassure her.
“Thanks,” she told him. “I appreciate you helping me.”
There was a cough behind them.
“Jessica,” Natalie said. How long had their lawyer been watching them?
Kyle abruptly dropped his hand at the same time that Jessica stepped away from him.
“I’m giving you the key to Joe’s office.” Natalie pulled it off the large key ring. “You’ll have the only copy, so it will be your private space.”
Had Natalie noticed her discomfort? Jessica took the key, determined to get a grip. “That will be great. Thank you.”
More composed now, Jessica turned to Kyle. More than ever, she needed to apologize to him for her past mistake, and she needed him to forgive her, too, but she’d wait until they were alone to discuss it. “When you come back from your walk-through, could you please stop by and see me, Kyle? I have something I need to speak to you about.”
Gazing at a spot on the wall behind her, Kyle nodded once. Shortly.
That was him being strong and silent in front of the lawyer. She got that.
“Thank you,” Jessica said again, quietly.
Kyle was home, healthy, doing what he was meant to do. Once she apologized for making Joe angry at him all those years ago, causing his departure, then she should be okay. At least, she hoped so.
* * *
KYLE COULD BARELY concentrate on the inspection tour ahead of him.
Natalie held a clipboard and was making notes, matching keys to locks, mainly. Besides Joe and Johnny David, Kyle was probably the only person in Wallis Point who knew all the secrets this old rink kept.
Too bad he was so fixated on Jessica. His guilt meter was through the roof. And now, not just guilt over dragging her back to face the past, but worry for her well-being, too.
Dammit. How could he ask her to come in here every day? Jessica seemed destroyed just by setting foot in this place again.
When he’d seen her face, staring at the faded spot where her picture had been, he’d been seized by the desire to take her under his wing and protect her at all costs. Which explained the touching-her-shoulder bit. That wasn’t his style. Never had been.
Natalie cleared her throat, and he snapped to attention. They were in the garage bay beside the hockey rink, inspecting an aging Zamboni. He glanced at the high driver’s seat, not sure if he could hoist himself up there, given his leg situation.
“Kyle,” Natalie said, “I was just saying that any time you want to confer about anything, my office is open to you. That goes for Bruce, as well.”
Bruce, her husband—the Navy veteran. “Are you saying this because I’m a veteran?” Kyle asked, mildly annoyed. Did she think he was emotionally damaged?
“My husband keeps in touch with a lot of your old classmates. I’m thinking maybe you’ll want to catch up with some old friends as you settle back into town.”
Kyle had new friends, from his time in the service. “Thanks, but I’m okay.” He turned and inspected the electric panel that controlled the rink’s overhead lights.
“Of course,” Natalie said. “I’m sure that you and Jessica will do just fine.”
Kyle thought of the space on the wall in the lobby where her poster had been. Jessa Hughes. World Junior Champion. The Pride of Wallis Point. That had been the caption beneath it. “Did you ever skate here when you were a kid?” he asked Natalie.
“Yes, I did. Many Friday night open skates, back when I was in middle school.”
He nodded. When Natalie was in middle school that poster of Jessica’s had been front and center. Jessa Hughes’s presence had brought in crowds of people to Joe’s old rink. She’d been a celebrity back then.
Slowly Kyle shut the squeaking cover of the electrical box. Everybody in Wallis Point would know about her youthful disappointment. That had to be hard for her. Yet no one knew anything about his leg. No one had been told in Wallis Point. There had been no news stories. It was his secret to tell, when he was ready.
Natalie was staring at him. “I have to go now, Kyle. Will you two be okay?”
They had to be. “Yes, ma’am.”
“Great. I’ll check up on you next week. Remember, my office is always open.”
* * *
AFTER KYLE WALKED Natalie to the front door, he knocked on Joe’s door—now Jessica’s door. He’d dreaded combat less than this encounter.
Bracing himself, he stepped aside as she joined him in the hallway. Through the front windows, they both watched Natalie walk down the ramp with her daughter.
“She’s a great little kid,” Jessica murmured. “Natalie is lucky to have her.”
Kyle stuffed his hands into his jeans pockets and said nothing.
Finally, Jessica tore her attention from the scene outside and gazed up at him. She would always be pretty to him, with her liquid brown eyes and ready smile. But now she had dark circles under her eyes. Her arms were crossed, and she appeared somber.
Automatically, his neck muscles tensed.
“I got a letter from Joe.” She licked her lips and gazed straight at his chest, as if embarrassed to look him in the eye. “I read it when I got home from the law office that day. I’ve been thinking about it ever since.”
