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Chapter Two New Arrival

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‘Hi. How are you? Have you enjoyed your rest?’ Jill, my support social worker from Homefinders, asked the following day.

It was mid-morning and I’d just returned from taking Adrian and Paula to school, having stopped off at the shops on my way home. I’d answered the telephone in the hall. ‘I’m fine, thanks, Jill,’ I said. ‘Very rested. Donna telephoned at the weekend and she’s doing well.’

‘Good. I’m pleased. She’s a nice kid. So you’re ready for your next placement? Raring to go?’

I smiled. ‘Yes, I am.’ For although I enjoyed a short break between fostering placements, I was always ready to welcome the next child. I foster because I want to; it’s what I do and love.

‘Great,’ Jill said. ‘How would you like a teenager who is seven months pregnant?’

I fell silent. I didn’t know how far into her pregnancy Jade was – Meryl hadn’t said – but surely this was too much of a coincidence? ‘She wouldn’t be called Jade, would she?’ I asked.

‘That’s right. The very same. I understand a teacher from her school has taken Jade under her wing and visited you last night.’

‘Yes, Meryl. I told her I couldn’t help her and she should telephone the duty social worker.’

‘She did. First thing this morning. Jade’s family is already known to the social services, and Meryl asked the family’s social worker if Jade could stay with you. She thinks you’ll take good care of her, and living in the same street she feels she’ll be able to offer some support, which may be a help or a hindrance. I’ve told the social worker that although you’re approved to foster teenagers you don’t normally do so – you’ve enough to cope with, and you certainly wouldn’t want a mother-and-baby placement.’ Jill, as always, was forthright in her manner and, as my support social worker, could be relied upon to have my best interest at heart.

‘Thank you,’ I said.

‘However,’ Jill continued, ‘Jade’s social worker is asking if you can look after Jade until they find a mother-and-baby placement: four weeks at the most. She’ll be moved before she has the baby. Jade won’t be going to school any more but they’re hoping to arrange some home tutoring. I said I’d ask you, but clearly it’s your decision, Cathy. Feel free to say no.’

‘I see,’ I said thoughtfully. ‘Just for a month?’

‘Yes.’

‘Can I think about it?’

‘Unfortunately no. They need a decision straightaway. Jade’s mother has thrown her out and Jade spent last night in Meryl’s bed while Meryl slept on the sofa. But Meryl’s husband is back tonight from a business trip and they don’t have a spare bedroom.’

‘I see,’ I said again. I felt sorry for Jade: it was bad enough to be pregnant at seventeen but to have no family support must be devastating. ‘And the social services will have found her a mother-and-baby carer before the baby is born?’

‘Yes. Absolutely.’

‘All right then, Jill,’ I said with a small flush of relief. ‘I’ll do what I can to help her. I’ll be pleased to.’

‘Great. I’ll tell Rachel, her social worker.’

‘I thought Meryl said Jade wasn’t having anything to do with the social services?’ I queried.

‘To be honest, Jade hasn’t got much choice,’ Jill said. ‘Rachel is already involved with the family and although Jade is adamant she wants to keep the baby, she’s going to have to prove she can look after it properly. Otherwise it will be taken into care.’

While this seemed harsh, it was in the best interest of the baby; babies are fragile, vulnerable little beings and if parenting goes badly wrong there is often no second chance.

‘Jade needs to start cooperating with the social services,’ Jill added. ‘She also needs their help. I think she’s starting to realize that.’

‘Good. So when do I meet Jade?’

‘I’ll phone Rachel now and tell her you’ve agreed to look after her, and then I’ll get back to you with more details. I think we’ll probably move Jade in late this afternoon or early evening. I want to be there and obviously Rachel will need to be there too. Are you in today, apart from the school run?’

‘Yes. I can be.’

‘I’ll phone you as soon as I’ve spoken to Rachel, then. Thanks, Cathy.’

‘You’re welcome.’

We said goodbye and as I replaced the receiver I felt a frisson of excitement: a new child and a new challenge. Although Jade wasn’t exactly a child, and she would only be staying with me for a short while, I would do all I could to help her. I felt sure she would benefit from some stability in her life and my TLC (tender loving care), which I prided myself on offering to all the children I looked after, and wouldn’t go amiss even with a teenager. A wiser, more experienced teen carer might have asked some appropriate questions – for example, about Jade’s boyfriend, the father of her unborn baby, and what involvement, if any, he would be having in Jade’s life. But for me at that moment, elated by the prospect of doing all I could to help Jade, such questions never crossed my mind.

Leaving the hall, I jogged up the stairs and to the spare bedroom to make some last-minute changes so that it was suitable for when Jade arrived and she felt comfortable. I didn’t think she’d mind the soft toys dotted around the room, but I removed the toy box. Then I changed the duvet cover and pillowcase, replacing the pictures of Batman with plain pale yellow. Satisfied the room was clean and welcoming, I returned downstairs. As a foster carer and an individual I try not to be judgemental, and if I thought Jade was far too young to be having a baby and that she should have been more careful I didn’t dwell on it. Who knew what past experience had brought Jade to this point in her life and self-righteous recrimination is never helpful. My role was to look after Jade and her unborn baby, which I intended to do to the best of my ability, and if she left me feeling less alone and better able to face the world then I would be delighted.

Jill telephoned again two hours later, by which time I had vacuumed the carpets, dusted the shelves, tidied the house and begun the preparation of the spaghetti bolognese for dinner. Although it was only lunchtime, I knew from experience that when a new child arrives time evaporates; I’d been caught out before by suddenly finding it was seven o’clock and no dinner was ready. Now, having been fostering for eleven years, I was better prepared. However, the only news Jill had was that she didn’t know when Jade would be arriving, as Rachel hadn’t been able to contact her. Apparently Jade wasn’t in school and Meryl didn’t know where she was.

‘I’ll phone as soon as I know more,’ Jill said.

Such uncertainty isn’t unusual in fostering, so I wasn’t fazed. Plans change and I knew enough about teenagers to know that their timekeeping was fluid and their appointment keeping variable.

As the afternoon was cold but bright I put the washing on the line to dry, and then with some time to spare I began a new fostering folder in preparation for Jade’s arrival. In this would go the forms the social worker would bring with her, as well as the daily record all foster carers have to keep of the child they are looking after. This includes medical, education and social-care appointments, any significant events, details of contact and the child’s general disposition. This record keeping allows the child’s progress to be monitored so that additional help can be accessed if necessary. The notes are confidential and when the child leaves the foster carer they are placed on the child’s file at the social services. Even though Jade would be with me for only a short while I had to start a file, although I couldn’t include much at present other than her name, age and today’s date. More information would follow with the social worker when she placed Jade.

Having heard no more from Jill that afternoon, I left the house at 3.00 to collect Paula from school. Adrian, as normal, would make his own way home from secondary school; usually he walked with his friends. I knew I needed to prepare both children for Jade’s arrival. Although they were used to children suddenly appearing and starting to live with us, a heavily pregnant teenager was something different – as new to them as it was for me.

I took the opportunity to talk to Paula on the way home. Once she’d finished telling me her news from her day at school, I said: ‘Jill phoned today and she’s asked us if we can look after a teenage girl for about a month.’

‘Good, I’m pleased we’re having a girl,’ Paula said. She always preferred fostering girls so that she had someone to play with, while Adrian preferred boys for the same reason, although in the end they usually all played together, and of course we had no choice as to which sex the child would be: it was matter of which child needed a foster home.

‘Yes, a big girl,’ I said. ‘She’s seventeen.’

‘Will she still want to play with me?’ Paula asked.

‘I am sure she will sometimes, although she’ll need a lot of rest. She’s expecting a baby.’

Paula went quiet for a moment and I could almost hear her thought processes ticking. I would wait for her next question rather than rush in.

‘Is the daddy coming to live with us too?’ Paula asked. Aged eight, Paula knew that babies had daddies, although they didn’t always live with their child.

‘No. It will just be Jade,’ I confirmed.

‘And the baby is still in her tummy?’

‘Yes. That’s right.’

‘Will it come out while she’s living with us?’ Paula asked, pulling a face. She also knew where babies came from and that giving birth was a messy business, from seeing baby rabbits being born.

‘No. Jade will leave us before the baby is born,’ I said. ‘Although there’s nothing to be squeamish about. Giving birth is perfectly natural.’

‘I’d rather be a bird and lay eggs,’ Paula said.

I smiled. ‘And have to build a nest each year? And then sit on the eggs until they hatch?’

Paula laughed and then fell silent again. I could see she was thinking again. ‘Do teenagers normally have babies?’ she asked. ‘Our teacher said you had to be an adult.’

‘It’s best to be an adult,’ I said, ‘although a teenager can have a baby. But it’s a big responsibility, so it’s much better to wait until you are older and have a nice home and a husband to help you.’ It might have sounded as though I was lecturing Paula, but I thought it was important she knew what was generally considered the better option. Paula was young and impressionable and looked up to older girls. I didn’t want her using Jade as a role model; pregnant at seventeen with nowhere to live – what mother would?

We’d just got home when the telephone rang. It was Jill. She said that Jade had been found and was now with her social worker, Rachel, and they would be with us at about five o’clock. Jill also said she was aiming to be with us just before then. As my support social worker, whenever possible she was present when a child was placed – to check the paperwork and that I had everything I needed to look after the child, and generally to be supportive and give advice where necessary.

Adrian arrived home at 4.30, and as he helped himself to a glass of milk and a banana I quickly brought him up to date.

‘Is that the girl that teacher wanted us to have?’ he asked. After Meryl had left the evening before, Adrian and Paula had asked what she’d wanted and I’d briefly told them.

‘Yes, the same one,’ I said. ‘Meryl – the teacher – phoned the social services first thing this morning. I’ve said we’ll look after Jade just for a month, until they’ve found her somewhere else to live.’

Adrian nodded and, having finished his snack, went off to play with his Nintendo in his room, which was far more interesting than a teenage girl coming to stay. Paula watched some children’s television. Then at 4.50 the doorbell rang and it was Jill. Paula knew we would need the sitting room and scampered off upstairs to play – either with Adrian or in her own room. Jill called hi to her and then came with me into the kitchen while I made her a cup of coffee.

Jill didn’t have any more details about Jade, so we’d have to wait until Rachel arrived with Jade. We went through to the sitting room with the coffee and Jill commented that snow was forecast, and also that it was good of Meryl to take such an interest in Jade. I agreed, although I didn’t tell Jill that Meryl’s interest was partly due to her having experienced something similar, as I thought she’d told me that in confidence.

At just gone 5.00 the doorbell rang and, feeling a little nervous and apprehensive, I left the sitting room and went down the hall to answer it. As I opened the front door the cold air rushed in.

‘Hello.’ I smiled. ‘I’m Cathy.’

‘Hello, I’m Rachel,’ the social worker said, shaking my hand and stepping into the hall first. ‘This is Jade, and this is Tyler, Jade’s boyfriend.’

‘It’s nice to meet you.’ I smiled again. Then, without thinking, I added to Tyler: ‘I wasn’t expecting you.’

‘No, nether was I,’ Rachel said pointedly.

‘I wanted him here,’ Jade put in a little grumpily.

‘OK,’ I said. ‘Welcome.’

‘He’ll just be here for a short while,’ Rachel said. ‘So he knows Jade is all right, and then he’ll be leaving.’

Tyler looked about aged twelve and beside Jade looked more like her son than boyfriend. Not only was she taller than him by a good two inches, but she was also about twice his width and matronly. I thought she’d probably been a bit overweight before her pregnancy but now with her stomach distended she was certainly a big girl and, to use a saying, looked as though she could have eaten him for dinner. She was plain but not unattractive, with chin-length brown hair. She was dressed in black leggings and a long jumper, which was stretched tightly over her bump.

Tyler was carrying a zipped holdall, which I assumed contained Jade’s belongings, and I suggested he left it in the hall. I then showed the three of them through to the sitting room, where Jill stood to greet them. I asked Rachel, Jade and Tyler if they would like something to drink but they didn’t want anything. Jade and Tyler sat close together at one end of the sofa and Rachel sat at the other, while Jill and I took the single chairs. Rachel was tall and slender and I guessed in her late twenties. She had a pleasant manner, warm and vibrant, although I thought she could be firm when necessary.

‘Thank you for agreeing to take Jade,’ Rachel said, removing a wodge of papers from her large bag-cum-briefcase. ‘She’s promised me she’s going to behave herself.’ Which suggested she might not have behaved herself in the past.

I smiled at Jade. She linked her arm through Tyler’s but didn’t smile back and concentrated on the carpet.

‘I’m pleased to be able to help,’ I said brightly. ‘I’m sure Jade and I will get along fine. I’m looking forward to having a teenager in the house.’

Tyler glanced at me, while Jade continued staring at the carpet.

‘Everything you need should be in here,’ Rachel said, passing a set of paperwork to me and then another to Jill. ‘Essential information and consent form – for the fostering. I’ve run through the contents with Jade and at her age she’ll sign the consent as well.’

I nodded and quickly flicked through the papers, which included the contact details of the social services; Jade’s mother’s address, which Jade had given as her permanent home; the names and dates of birth of Jade’s siblings; and the names and date of birth of the baby’s father, from which I quickly calculated Tyler to be only sixteen. Jill was also glancing through the paperwork.

‘Cathy,’ Rachel said after a moment, ‘I would like you to make sure Jade attends her antenatal appointments. She’s missed some in the past and they are important.’

‘Absolutely,’ I said. ‘When is the next one due?’

‘Next week,’ Rachel said. ‘She attends the Lakeview Health Centre for her antenatal care.’

‘I want Tyler to come too,’ Jade said, finally raising her eyes from the floor to look at Rachel.

‘That’s fine,’ Rachel said, ‘as long as he doesn’t miss school. You’ve got exams this year, haven’t you?’

Tyler shrugged. ‘Maybe. Dunno. I’m leaving school as soon as I can.’

‘When exactly is the appointment?’ Jill now asked.

‘Jade has the appointment card in her bag,’ Rachel said.

‘It’s in the hall. I’ll get it later,’ Jade said.

‘Make sure you tell Cathy the date in plenty of time,’ Jill said to Jade. ‘Cathy has two children and she has to work around their commitments too.’

Jade nodded sullenly, but I appreciated she had a lot to cope with and how difficult all this must be for her.

‘Jade has some of her clothes with her,’ Rachel said, moving on, ‘enough for tonight and a couple of days, but she’s hoping to collect some more of her belongings from home tomorrow. Aren’t you, Jade?’

Jade nodded.

‘Jade won’t be attending school any more,’ Rachel continued, looking at me, ‘so perhaps the two of you could go to her home tomorrow and pick up her things? Jade has a front door key if no one is in.’

‘That’s fine with me,’ I said. ‘We’ll go in my car.’

‘Will Jade’s mother be home?’ Jill asked, mindful that some parents are angry towards the foster carer when their child is taken into care.

Rachel looked at Jade, who shrugged. ‘Dunno,’ she said.

‘Jade’s mother works part time,’ Rachel said. ‘But she’s all right with me, so there shouldn’t be a problem meeting you. She’s happy for Jade to visit whenever she wants to.’

‘Are you comfortable going?’ Jill asked me.

‘Yes,’ I said. I was usually able to work with the parents whose children I fostered. However, I was becoming increasingly aware of just how different it was going to be fostering a teenager compared to a younger child; for example, children in care normally only see their parents at supervised contact, whereas Jade could go and see her mother any time. Another reminder followed quickly, as Rachel said: ‘I’ve told Jade that this placement is for her only. She can see Tyler but he is not to stay here overnight.’

Please Don’t Take My Baby and I Miss Mummy 2-in-1 Collection

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