Читать книгу Create Your Own Yellow Brick Road - Christina PhD Garabedian - Страница 4

Loving Yourself

How can you love yourself? What is meant by loving yourself? You may say to yourself that you are an excellent provider or parent or you have a successful business and feel confident in what you have accomplished and people like you but do you like yourself?

Are you happy with you? You must find your self-worth and know that you are the most important person in your life. You must be first while others come second. This is a hard concept for many individuals to grasp.

As a parent, you may say that my child comes first, which is not uncommon. You must understand that in order for you to be the best parent or person that you can, that you must first know your self and love yourself. Your inner dialogue and feelings within in regards to how you see yourself do reflect on others around you. Begin to explore who you are as an individual outside the confines of your role as a mother or spouse. Think about what makes you passionate about life and try to think about how you best want to express this passion. How would you develop this passion? How would you allow this zest affect other areas of your life?

There are special qualities about each and every one of us. If everybody shared the same characteristics and qualities, the world would be an extremely boring place. Who are you? Are you trying to be or live in way that’s not compatible with your true nature? First, you need to look at yourself deeply. You can change what you perceive to be a negative attribute into a positive one. Sure there are things that you would like to change about yourself and your life, but that isn't necessarily a bad thing and not everything about you needs to be changed. Let’s think about those great qualities that make you who you are.

First, let's examine your good qualities. Take out a pen and paper and actually write down 5 of your best qualities. If you are having a hard time with this, just really dig down deep down inside and think about what you do on a day-to-day basis. Do you cook? If you do, are you good at it? Well there is a good quality; you are a good cook. Are you organized? Are you a dedicated spouse or mother? Do you enjoy helping others? Do you like animals? Are you good with animals? Do you enjoy writing?

Let's take a look at my best qualities list.

•I'm a great listener

•I truly care about people and helping others

•I'm motivated

•I'm a great mother

•I'm attractive

Now that I have it written down on paper, I can glance at it to remind me that I am important and these are the qualities that make me the person that I am today. No one can take these qualities from me because they are mine.

For those of us who have suffered abuse it may be a bit harder to find your best qualities because you have probably been put down time and time again. Just know that the person who made you feel this way did it because they had a lot of issues and most likely never found their self-worth. They were not confident in who they were as a person and felt they must hurt someone else in order to make themselves feel better or have some sort of control. Abusive people usually feel they have no control in some aspect of their life therefore they try to control someone else to make them feel more powerful.

After being in an abusive relationship you must heal and move forward. Do not let the abuser outline what your future will be because that is giving them control all over again. Your future is yours and yours alone, which is why it is important to think about what makes you happy and what will make you love yourself and life again.

Once you have written down your top qualities then place the paper, notebook or journal that you have written in some place handy. Have it in a spot that is easily accessible so that you can view it. If you had a hard time coming up with the list then I would view it on a daily basis.

Be sure to read the list out loud and with confidence as needed. Be loud and proud. By doing this you are hearing positive affirmations about yourself. You may be motivated to make changes in your life but you are also taking the steps to find love within.

You cannot love another until you love yourself first. Imagine how much happier you will be in if you can find comfort from within and do not have to rely on anybody else to help you find comfort.

We just touched lightly on the term “positive affirmations,” which is a very important part of finding your self-worth. By using positive affirmations daily you are taking the steps towards having a positive outlook on life. You are saying that you are changing the negative thinking and replacing it with positive statements.

Let's do another exercise by writing some positive affirmations down; you may want to write them on post it notes and stick them on places that you regularly visit throughout your house. Stick them on the mirror in your bathroom, on the refrigerator, by the computer if you work on it daily or even in your car since a lot of people spend quite a bit of time driving.

This is a psychological technique that works to promote emotional well-being and self-worth. Now let's think of some different positive affirmations that we can write down.

•I am a beautiful person

•I love life

•I will finish my project today

•People love me

•I can handle whatever comes my way

•I am a strong person

•I deserve love

•I am at peace

•I am worthy of good things in life

•I can accomplish anything

The affirmations above are just a few examples. You must create affirmations that pertain to what you intend on working on in your life.

Please repeat the affirmations daily or even twice daily. Say them aloud and believe them. Know that what you are saying is true. You will notice the negative thinking leaving your mind as the positive energy flow replaces it.