Читать книгу Having Tanner Bravo's Baby - Christine Rimmer - Страница 9

A baby…

Tanner gazed down into Crystal’s wide eyes. She had the face of an angel, he’d always thought. Never more so than now. Her cheeks had flushed pink and a few strands of her long, curly hair had gotten loose from the golden mass and coiled over her left eye. He lifted his hand to tuck them behind her ear.

She caught his wrist, her grip fierce. “It’s yours,” she said, hitching her delicate chin high. “It’s yours and I’m keeping it.”

He waited until she let go, and then he continued the action, catching the soft strands, guiding them back into place. “Okay.”

Her honey-brown eyes flashed at him. “Okay? That’s all? Just…okay?”

“Crystal…” He wanted to comfort her somehow, or at least to reassure her that he would be there, that she could count on him.

But before he could find the words for that, she demanded, “Okay, you believe it’s yours—or it’s okay with you that I keep it?”

“Look, I…”

“What?”

“Both, okay? Both.”

“Both,” she whispered, doubting. Defensive.

“That’s right.”

A silence. Her full lower lip quivered. “I…I’m sorry. Suddenly, I’m kind of being a bitch about this, for no reason I can think of.”

He shrugged. “It’s okay. I can take it.”

“It’s just…” She heaved another ragged breath. “I’ve been trying to tell you for two weeks now. I was beginning to think I’d never work up the nerve. And now, all of a sudden, it’s out, I’ve said it. You know.” She stared at him, as if trying to decide what to say next. And then she added, “I’m sure it’s…hard to accept.” Strangely, it wasn’t. She added, “So, if you want a paternity test—”

“No. I don’t.”

She blinked. “Just like that. You believe that it’s yours?”

“I do.”

It was more than mere belief. Tanner knew the baby was his. Because he knew Crystal. Yeah, she could be irresponsible. She really ought to take life more seriously. As of today she was out of work and he doubted she had more than a few hundred dollars in the bank. She never talked about her family, about her life before she met and became friends with Tanner’s brother-inlaw, Mitch Valentine, down in L.A. Tanner knew she kept secrets. But she wasn’t a liar. If she said the kid was his, it was.

A kid. His kid…

How incredible was that?

She backed up against the sink counter. “We should…sit down, don’t you think? Talk about this a little?”

“Right.” He headed for the futon again. Aside from the dinner table with its two mismatched chairs, it was the only place to sit in the living area. She claimed she owned real furniture—she’d just left it behind for six months when she sublet her Hollywood apartment.

She trailed after him. They sat at either end of the long, lumpy blue cushion. The day was fading and shadows filled the corners of the room. She turned on the lamp that she’d borrowed from his sister.

Then she slumped into the cushion, letting her head rest on the back of the futon, and folded her hands on her still flat stomach. “I…sheesh. I hardly know where to start.”

He felt the same. But then he realized he did have a question. “Who else knows?”

It was a reasonable thing to ask. His sister, Kelly, was Crystal’s best friend—and had been almost from the first day Crystal appeared at Kelly’s front door looking for Mitch. Crystal considered Mitch to be the brother she’d never had; she claimed she’d packed up on the spur of the moment and moved to Sacramento because she “sensed” that Mitch needed her. So she very well might have told either of them—or both—that she was pregnant before she told Tanner.

Until then, she’d been keeping her eyes straight ahead, in the general direction of her small TV screen, which was flanked on either side by brick and board bookcases filled with books on things like reading tarot cards, feng shui and natural healing.

But now she rolled her head his way. “No one else knows yet. Just you.”

Her answer pleased him in some mysterious, deep way. “Well, okay.”

That curl of hair had settled over her eye again. She reached up and swiped it aside. “You keep saying ‘okay.’”

He shrugged. “It’s all pretty new. You could say I’m at a loss for words.”

“Oh, yeah. I hear you there.” She was nodding, her irritation of a moment before gone as fast as it had appeared. “And now that you mention it, well, we are going to have to tell them, sooner or later….”

From the first time they ended up in bed together, Tanner and Crystal had agreed to keep this thing between them a secret. It had made perfect sense to both of them all along—after all, each time it happened was supposed to be the last time. And since Crystal hadn’t told either Mitch or Kelly about the baby, chances were the other couple was still in the dark about the two of them.

It was just too damned weird to try to explain to the family that he and Crys didn’t want to go out with each other, that they had nothing in common, didn’t want to get anything started when it was so clear it was going nowhere—and yet somehow they couldn’t help ending up naked together every time they saw each other.

He suggested, “Maybe we should wait until they get back from their trip to say anything about this.”

“Agreed,” Crystal said. “And I think I’ll wait to mention losing my job, too. After all, it’s their honeymoon. It’s a time that’s supposed to be all about them.”

Kelly and Mitch—recently reunited after years apart—were leaving the next day for two weeks on an island paradise somewhere east of Madagascar. Though they’d tied the knot a month earlier, it had taken Kelly several weeks to clear her calendar at work for the trip. Crystal would be staying at the house while the newlyweds were gone, looking after Tanner’s niece, DeDe. Tanner, whose job often took him away from Sacramento for days at a time, was supposed to be helping out Crystal whenever his schedule allowed.

Crystal stared glumly at the dark TV again. “Strange. For two weeks, all I’ve thought about is how I had to tell you. And now that I have, I feel…I don’t know. Limp. Numb. Like I don’t know what to do next.”

“It’s—” he almost said okay, but stopped himself just in time “—all right.”

She looked at him, forced a smile. “Just think. If I’d only kept my mouth shut, we could be having great sex right now, instead of sitting here on this futon not knowing what to say to each other.”

“I’m glad you told me,” he said gruffly.

Another silence fell between them. He heard her sigh. She stared across the room again as he considered the question of what to do next.

To Tanner, family was everything. And now this woman was having his baby. She wasn’t the woman he’d planned to settle down with. Whenever he thought of getting serious with a woman, which he’d always imagined would happen eventually, he’d pictured a quiet, steady kind of person at his side, a practical, thrifty woman—in short, a woman nothing like the one slumped next to him on the futon now.

Then again, he was thirty-one, and where was this ideal woman he’d always told himself he was looking for? Now and then over the years, he’d met women like the one he’d always told himself he wanted. He’d asked each of those admirable females out. They’d all bored him silly.

Crystal never bored him. Also, she was already more or less a part of his family. Not to mention the only woman he’d had on his mind—or in his bed—since she came rolling into town in that dusty red Camaro of hers two and a half months ago.

Most important, he had to think of the baby’s welfare. Yeah, he wanted his kid to have his name. What man wouldn’t want that? But even more than his name, Tanner wanted him to grow up in a real family, the kind he’d never had as a kid.

Crystal heaved a sigh. “Oh, well. It had to be done. You needed to know. And I’m glad I’ve finally told you.”

He stared at her profile, thinking that even in rippedout jeans and a red-and-white striped T-shirt she looked like a princess in some old-timey fairy tale. Her features were even and delicate, her skin that classic peaches and cream. And then there was all that gorgeous, curly hair. He liked to bury his face in it when they were making love, to wrap it around his fist….

She rolled her head his way again. “And one thing I really do want to make clear to you—I mean, I know how you are….”

He gave her the lifted eyebrow. “Oh, yeah? How’s that?”

“You’re a total traditionalist at heart.”

He already knew he wasn’t going to like whatever was coming next. “So what if I am?”

She reached across and put her hand on his arm, as if to steady him for what she was going to say next. And then she laid it on him. “I need you to understand, right now from the first, that marriage is not on the agenda.”

Should he have known that was coming? Probably. He lowered his arm out from under her touch. “So there’s an agenda, huh?”

“It’s only a figure of speech—meaning ‘in the plan.’ Marriage is not in the plan. I want us to learn to work together to make the best life we can for the baby. I’m hoping that over the months and years to come our…connection as single parents will evolve.”

Evolve? She wanted them to evolve? Like something that crawled up out of the ocean and eventually learned to stand on two legs? Though he had a fine poker face and used it at that moment, it irked him no end that she said ‘in the plan,’ as if there was only one plan—the plan, meaning her plan.

However, it was enough for the moment that she’d gotten the truth out of that beautiful mouth of hers. There would be plenty of time later to discuss the marriage issue. For now he said, in the same neutral tone he’d been using most of the evening, “Well, all right.”

“Great.” She straightened up and gave him a bright smile and a brisk nod, as if their single-parent future was all settled.

It wasn’t. Not by a long shot. True, the two of them were no match made in heaven. But still, maybe the marriage angle deserved at least a little consideration….

The shining black limousine was waiting at the curb in front of Kelly’s house when Crystal arrived the next morning at ten. The windows of the big car were tinted, so she couldn’t see the driver, but she knew there was one in there.

Mitch, an entrepreneur who owned companies in Dallas and in L.A., must have ordered the car to drive him and Kelly to the airport. He often used limos to get around, so the sight of it was no surprise.

Tanner’s car was there, too, parked in the driveway. Not surprising, either. Of course, he’d want to be there to wish the newlyweds a great trip.

Crystal pulled in next to the black Mustang. He’d been so great about everything last night, so gentle and sweet and accepting. And so agreeable, too.

Agreeable. She smiled to herself. It wasn’t a word she would have associated with the tall, dark and devastatingly sexy Tanner—until now. How wrong she had been.

She got out of the car and strolled up the front walk, enjoying the bright May sunshine, so warm on her back, admiring the red roses in bloom near the porch. Such a fine, fine day. And her life seemed to be shaping up. No, she didn’t have a job. But she would find one, soon. And Tanner knew about the baby.

Things could be worse.

Then a harried-looking Kelly pulled open the front door. “You’re here. Good.” Her smooth brows were drawn together in a distracted-looking frown.

“What’s going on?” Crystal stepped up into the entry hall.

“It’s DeDe.” Kelly shook her head. Deirdre was Mitch’s natural child, the result of his and Kelly’s high school love affair. But when Kelly had left town to live with her newfound brother, Mitch had broken off their relationship and disappeared—after which Kelly had discovered she was having his baby.

Ten years had passed before Kelly had found him again. Now Kelly had the man she’d never stopped loving. Mitch had the family he needed more than anything. And DeDe had her father, at last. Everything should have been perfect.

Kelly added softly, “She used to be the most levelheaded, easygoing kid around. But sometimes lately, I just don’t know….”

“Where is she?”

“In her room. Throwing one hell of a tantrum. Mitch is in there with her. She’s decided she doesn’t want us to go.”

Crystal made a low, sympathetic noise.

Kelly gestured toward the living room, and the kitchen beyond. “Tanner’s here.” All the old fondness was back in her voice when Kelly said her brother’s name. Something had gone wrong between Tanner and Kelly when Mitch had come back. Neither of them would talk about it. But whatever the problem was, it seemed to be over now. “Give us a minute or two. We’re trying to settle her down before we go.”

“Courage.”

“Thanks. I’ll need it.” Kelly disappeared down the hall.

Dropping her purse on the low bench by the big bay window as she passed, Crystal went through the living room. In the kitchen, she found Tanner sitting at the table with a full mug of coffee in front of him.

“’Morning,” he said, his deep voice sending the inevitable thrill coursing through her.

“Hi.” She pulled out a chair.

“There’s coffee…” He frowned. “Or is that off the menu now?”

“Pretty much. Not that I mind. I was never real big on coffee, anyway. Kelly’s got some herbal teas—but maybe later.” His hair was still damp from his morning shower. She wanted to touch it, to put her hand on the side of his freshly shaved cheek—but no. Kelly or Mitch might come in any minute. And they were keeping their relationship to themselves until after the honeymoon.

Their relationship. Crystal almost smiled. Now, with the baby coming and his easy acceptance of the fact, it seemed okay to call this thing between them a relationship. True, it wasn’t your usual kind of relationship. They weren’t headed for a lifetime of love and marriage or anything. But they were committed to the baby, and they were going to work together to be good parents. Now, by any definition of the word, they had a relationship. An important one.

And she found that it pleased her, to think of the two of them as more than just matching sets of wild hormones unable to keep from jumping each other at every possible opportunity.

“What’s up with DeDe?” She kept her voice low.

“Acting out,” he spoke out of the corner of his mouth. “Big time.”

“Should we do something, you think? I’d hate to see them postpone their trip.”

“Do something like what?”

She thought about that and shrugged. “Good question.”

“Don’t worry. They’re not backing out of the trip. Or so they said a few minutes ago….”

Right then they heard a door open in the hallway, then Mitch’s voice: “Come on, Kell. We have to get going….”

A cry—from DeDe. “Oh, Dad. How can you do this? How can you just go?”

“Stop it,” said Kelly. “Stop it now.”

“But—”

“Enough.” Kelly’s voice was flat and final. “Your father and I are going on our honeymoon and your behaving badly is not going to stop us.”

DeDe muttered something that Crystal couldn’t make out.

Then Kelly spoke again, in a tone that would tolerate no argument. “Wipe your eyes and blow your nose. And come out and say goodbye to us. Now.”

Footsteps in the hallway. Kelly and Mitch came in through the dining room, looking stressed out when they should have been happy and dewy-eyed, a pair of newlyweds heading off for two weeks of romance in a tropical paradise.

Crystal rose as they entered. She went and hugged them both, Kelly first. When she got to Mitch, she said, “Please don’t worry about DeDe. As soon as you’re gone, she’ll snap out of it, I’m sure.”

Mitch’s brown eyes were full of doubts. “Hold that thought. Because we are going and that’s that. The limo’s packed up and we’re outta here.” He took Crystal’s hand and pressed a check into it.

She looked down at it and shook her head. “It’s way too much. Food is only going to be—”

“Crys.” Kelly stepped in. “We want to be sure that everything’s handled. Extra is better than not enough.”

“Yeah,” Mitch added dryly. “Take the money. For once.” He was always trying to give her money—like the honorary big brother he was to her. He had a fortune and somehow she was always just barely scraping by. He never understood that it was a point of pride with her to pay her own way.

“Thanks,” she said, accepting that now wasn’t the time to argue about it.

Tanner said, “Don’t worry. We’ll take care of DeDe. She’ll be fine.”

We? DeDe’s care, after all, was to be mostly on Crystal. Tanner would be around when he could manage it. She sent him a questioning glance and he gave her a nod. Whatever that meant.

Then again, he would want them to know he had her back. She was glad for that. Truly.

More footsteps in the hall. DeDe appeared, followed by the scruffy brown dog she’d named Cisco, a stray Mitch had found and adopted after the loss of Candy. The dog dropped to its haunches and panted in contentment.

DeDe, on the other hand, had a red nose and a look of pure misery in her puffy eyes. She wore a purple leotard and tights to match.

“Goodbye,” she said glumly and held up her cheek to be kissed.

Mitch and Kelly exchanged bleak glances. But neither wavered. They hugged their daughter and told her they loved her. DeDe bore their attention with the brave determination of a tragic heroine condemned to a horrible and hopeless fate.

Kelly pointed out the calendar she’d made of DeDe’s numerous activities. It was mounted by magnet on the fridge, a list of phone numbers beside it. “Cell phone service will be undependable. But there are landlines in the suite. And if you call the resort’s main desk, they’ll track us down. So you can always reach us,” she said. “Anytime.”

Tanner stood. “We’re on it.” There was that we again. “Don’t worry.”

Kelly grabbed him in a hug. “I just want to be sure we’ve covered everything. You both already have keys….”

“It’s going to be fine,” Crystal promised.

They all moved toward the front door—even the sulking DeDe, who trailed behind the others, still angry but unwilling to let her parents go without giving them a final, reluctant wave goodbye. The dog followed DeDe, taking up the rear.

The four of them—Crystal, Tanner, DeDe and Cisco—stood out on the sidewalk until the limo rounded the corner. DeDe turned for the house first.

Inside, the nine-year-old went straight to her room, the faithful mutt at her heels.

Crystal started to follow, but Tanner caught her hand. He shook his head and said low, “Don’t get all over her now. Let her settle down a little.”

Crystal decided he was probably right. “Good point.” She pulled her hand free. It felt much too good tucked so warmly in his.

“She’s leaving in a few minutes anyway,” he said. “Some lesson or other, I think.”

Crystal went into the kitchen to double-check the calendar. Sure enough, a lesson at eleven and an afternoon at a friend’s to follow.

Tanner stuck his head in the doorway from the living room. “Am I right?”

“Yep.”

DeDe, wearing her purple backpack, trudged back in from the hallway. “I have to go now,” she said loftily. “I have modern dance at eleven. Mrs. Lu is picking me up. Then we’ll go to Mia’s after.” Mia Lu was in several of DeDe’s dance classes as well as in her class at school. The two girls were good friends. “I’ll be back by four. If that’s okay.”

Crystal gave her a smile. “See you at four, then.”

DeDe sniffed, a sound that was followed by a heavy sigh. “Well. Okay, then. Bye…”

Tanner nodded. “Later.”

“Cisco. Stay,” DeDe commanded. The dog gave a low whine and sat. DeDe went out the front door. By silent agreement, Crystal and Tanner moved to the bay window in the living room. They watched as Mrs. Lu drove up in her white van. DeDe got in and the van drove away.

Tanner grunted. “That kid. She used to be so reasonable.” He nudged her gently with his elbow. “Maybe you should chant to make her change her attitude.”

“Ha-ha.”

“Or maybe she needs a hot rock massage….”

She granted him a glance of cool superiority. “How many times do I have to explain to you that enlightenment is a personal journey? She has to want to change. That’s the first, all-important step.”

“Woo-woo,” he said.

“Tease me all you want, but deep down, you know what I’m saying is true.”

He put his arm around her, a fond sort of gesture, as they stood there gazing out the window together. She didn’t pull away. It felt good—companionable.

And he said in a musing tone, “Even as a baby, she would lie there making happy, cooing sounds. Hardly ever cried. I gotta say, the way she’s been behaving lately, I almost wish she was a baby again. I’ll take the loaded diapers and the feedings every four hours, any day.”

That’s right, Crystal thought. Kelly was still in high school when she had DeDe—and living with her big brother at the time. Tanner would know all about DeDe as a baby. The idea pleased her. He might be a tough, private eye type, but he did have experience with babies. More experience than she had, when you came right down to it.

She predicted, “I’m sure DeDe’ll get used to the changes having her dad around has made in her life. She’ll be her old self again in time, just watch.”

Tanner grunted. “I only hope it’s soon. Think. She’s almost ten. She’ll be a teenager before you know it. When that happens, all bets are off.”

Crystal’s thoughts strayed back to the baby—their baby. “It’s not easy, is it, raising a child?”

He put on a dark look. “Hell, no.” And then he grinned. “Haven’t you heard? Only crazy people have kids.”

She laughed. “Crazy. Right.”

“That’s us,” he said low. “Out of our minds in a big, big way.” And they shared a long look of what could only be called mutual understanding. Bizarre. Crystal and Tanner, all bondy together. But then he said, “Well, I guess we ought to bring our stuff in, get settled, all that….” He dropped his arm from around her shoulders and started for the door.

Our stuff? The good feeling fled. He was up to something.

“Wait a minute.”

He turned back to her. “Yeah?”

“You just said our stuff?”

“That’s right.” His expression was way too innocuous—and Tanner Bravo was never innocuous. The vague sense of alarm she felt ratcheted up a notch. Then he said, “I gave it some thought last night after I left your place, and I realized that this was a great opportunity and we shouldn’t let it pass us by.”

She stared at him, not following. “A great opportunity?”

“Oh, yeah.”

“For what?”

“To live together.”

She still didn’t understand. “But…why would we want to live together?”

“Oh, come on, Crys. You know it’s a good idea.”

“No. No, I don’t. There’s no reason we need to share a house.”

“Yeah. We do.”

“No. We don’t.”

“Think of it this way. It’s like an experiment. To see how we get along, being around each other every day. Just in case.”

She fell back a step. “Just in case…what?”

“In case we decide we want to get married, after all.”