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Chapter Two

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“THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE, Russell.” Jane sounded calm. The only sign betraying her agitation was the end-over-end rotation of her pen as she jabbed it again and again on a blank page of her notepad.

Matthew recognized the nervous habit from years of observing Jane in court. It was something she fell back on when she felt cornered.

The three of them were alone in the conference room now. The other partners had scattered at the official closing of the meeting. Jane and Matthew had moved to sit on either side of Russell.

“She’s right,” he said, hoping his composure was a match for hers. “We can’t work together.”

“Aren’t you being dramatic? A year has passed, guys. The divorce is behind you, Matt. We can’t do anything about that now.”

Russell made it sound so cut-and-dried. From a legal standpoint, Matthew supposed he was correct. But emotional wounds couldn’t be healed with a court document. A year had passed but they were all still hurting.

“Come on, Russell. You’ve made Jane the lead lawyer. She might as well handle the case on her own. I’ll just get in her way.”

“Wally Keller is scared, Matt. Can you imagine how it feels to be accused of something like this? What do you suppose he’ll tell his wife? His kids? He knows you and he trusts you. Can you blame him for wanting a familiar face on his team?”

Matthew paused, thinking about how Wally had gone out of his way to help his son at the beginning of the season. Unlike most of the other boys on the team, Derrick hadn’t started his adolescent growth spurt yet and was self-conscious about his size. At the team’s first practice, the coach proposed a strategy for dealing with the bigger boys on the field. His suggestions had given Derrick a whole new confidence in his abilities.

“If Matt has to be on the case, then let him handle it on his own,” Jane insisted. “Or assign another lead lawyer.”

“No one else has the time right now. And since your Laskin case wrapped up last week, Jane, you’re the obvious choice. Besides, it is your turn.”

She bowed her head, acknowledging the logic of his argument.

“Matt. Jane. Let’s be reasonable adults here. We can’t let a bunch of ugly rumors—and I have no doubt they were just rumors—destroy two excellent careers. Everyone remembers how well you two used to work together. Your skills complement each other, and I have every faith in your ability to provide Wally Keller the best defense this firm can offer.”

With that, Russell rose from his chair. He slid a file to the center of the table. “This is all I have so far. Mr. Keller is scheduled for an initial consult at one o’clock tomorrow. I’ve taken the liberty of booking the small conference room for your meeting.”

He left the room, diplomatically closing the door behind him. Matthew fixed his gaze on the folder. As he watched, Jane reached for it and pulled it across the table.

Their eyes met.

“I suppose Russ has a point,” Matthew began tentatively. “In a firm this size we can’t avoid each other forever.”

“Really? I thought we were getting damn good at it.”

He laughed. Then quickly sobered. “Not that I ever wanted to avoid you. I hate that you were stuck in the middle of my personal disaster.”

“It wasn’t your fault.”

“There are some who would disagree.”

“I can’t believe Gillian actually spied on you.” Jane clapped her hand to her mouth. “Sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. But it’s just so wrong. You’re the most honest person I know.”

“I appreciate that. But I’m not sure it’s true.”

She gave him a doubtful glance. “Who have you ever lied to?”

Acknowledging the churning feelings inside himself, Matthew knew the answer. “The most important person.”

“Your wife?”

He shook his head. Despite Gillian’s accusations to the contrary, he’d never deliberately told her anything but the truth. His deceptions had gone much deeper.

“Myself.”

BEFORE SHE’D MET Matthew Gray, Jane had assumed that men like him didn’t exist anymore. Regardless of the progress women had made in the workforce over the past few decades, she still encountered sexism on a regular basis: biased judges, condescending prosecutors, and clients who thought only a man could handle the job. Jane had seen it all.

Matthew displayed none of those prejudices. From her first day at the firm, he’d treated her with the same respect he accorded all his colleagues.

His underlying gallantry had nothing to do with male dominance, but was simply a manifestation of his good manners and consideration.

It hadn’t taken long for him to become her favorite lawyer to work with at Brandstrom and Norton.

She’d always known he was married, and it had never occurred to her that that might cause any problems. Unlike some of her other married colleagues, he did not flirt with women, not even in so-called harmless ways.

Jane had felt perfectly safe putting in late hours with him, and had never expected that the real danger didn’t lie with him, but with her.

She still couldn’t pinpoint the moment she’d fallen in love with him. Maybe it was when she’d seen how tenderly he’d interviewed a scared young mother fighting for custody of her child. But it might just as easily have been as Jane watched him shred the testimony of a prosecutor’s star witness who’d traded away the freedom of Matthew’s client.

Now, as she tried to focus on the case notes in front of her, she wondered if it truly was possible for the two of them to work together again.

She cleared her throat. “So what do you know about this guy?”

Matthew seemed surprised, then amused. “That’s how you want to handle this? Straight to the business at hand?”

“Do we have another choice?”

“You could tell me what’s been going on in your life over the past twelve months.”

Through various internal channels he would have heard about the professional stuff. “You mean my personal life?”

“Well…yeah.”

Her cheeks turned hot. She was blushing. How ridiculous was that? His interest meant little. Matthew probably felt a measure of responsibility for her happiness. Not that he ought to, but he was that sort of man. Probably he wanted reassurance that her life hadn’t fallen apart the way his had.

And of course it hadn’t.

You needed to have a personal life in order for it to fall apart. And she didn’t. She hadn’t had a serious romantic relationship in years. The last one had ended so badly it had taken her over a year to recover. And then, just when she’d been ready to start dating again, she’d realized she was falling for Matthew, a married man.

Ever since, work had been her only safe outlet.

But she couldn’t tell him that.

She struggled to think of something to say. “I joined a health club last September.”

He laughed. “That’s your news?”

“Hey, it was a big step for me.”

“Do you ever go?”

“To use the sauna and the hot tub,” she confessed.

“I joined a health club, too.”

“The Executive Club downstairs?”

“Yes.”

“I thought I saw you there the other day.” She’d gone to unwind in the sauna after a grueling day in court. As she’d headed for the change rooms, she’d noticed Matthew running laps, his face so tense she’d ached for him.

“We’ll have to meet for a workout sometime.”

She nodded, assuming they wouldn’t. “How are your brothers?”

“Nick’s still busting his butt, hoping for that promotion to detective. And Gavin’s living the small-town dream in New Hampshire, with his new wife, Allison, and his daughter, Tory.”

Though she’d never met anyone in Matthew’s family, Matthew talked about them a lot. She had a soft spot for Gavin, who had lost his daughter Samantha, Tory’s twin, in a terrible accident about two years ago. “I heard that Gavin remarried. That’s good.”

“Yeah, it is. Allison’s been great for him. And for Tory. Even Mom likes her.”

“And how’s your mom? Is she handling the changes in your life okay?”

“She’s not happy about the divorce. But since she sold the house and moved into a condominium for seniors, she’s doing a lot better. She’s made friends and isn’t so anxious anymore.”

Matthew gave her a speculative look tinged with sympathy. “How’s your dad? Have you visited him lately?”

“Two Christmases ago.” Back in the days when she and Matt had worked together often, she’d confessed how ambivalent she felt about her dad’s second marriage. She was glad he was happy, but his life was so full now he didn’t have much time left for her.

Oh, boo-hoo, Jane. You’re an adult. Stop feeling sorry for yourself. She straightened her back. “So. Are we all caught up now? Can we finally discuss our case?”

Matt laughed ruefully. “Back to business, huh?”

“You said you met Coach Keller at a party for your son’s soccer team. So you know him quite well then.”

“Not really. This is the first year he’s coached Derrick’s team. It’s a volunteer position.”

She flipped a page in the file Russell had left for them. “The notes say Wally Keller is new to Hartford.”

“That’s right. His family moved from Maine for the start of the school year.”

“We’ll have to find out why.” Any hint of scandal behind the relocation wouldn’t bode well.

“Yes. He told me he was transferred through the accounting company where he works, but of course we’ll need to check that.”

They went through a list of discussion points regarding their new client. He’d been married fifteen years, had a son Derrick’s age and a younger daughter. His work history was solid, and he had no priors.

“He sounds like your average upstanding citizen,” Jane concluded at the end of half an hour.

“Let’s hope appearances aren’t deceiving.”

When they left the conference room, it was almost noon. In the old days they would have gone to the deli downstairs for a quick sandwich.

But times were different.

They stood in the hallway looking awkwardly at each other, before Jane finally broke away to catch the elevator. She thought Matt was watching her, but when she glanced back, he was gone.

He was probably planning to eat lunch in his office. That was what he seemed to do most days.

Down in the lobby she picked up a chef’s salad at the deli. But as she sat at a small table for two and tried to eat, her stomach refused to cooperate. She set down the plastic fork and gave up the effort.

Her career meant everything to her, and it hung in the balance. Russell Fielding had been tactful, yet he’d made it clear that this past year had put a strain not only on her and Matt, but on their coworkers, too.

For twelve months she’d been resisting the truth, but now she faced it. If she couldn’t get past this thing for Matthew, she would have to find another job.

AFTER THE MEETING with Jane, Matthew ordered a sandwich to be delivered to his desk. Work had been his sanctuary in the past, he certainly needed the escape today. He opened the top file from a stack and stared at lines of type that blurred into illegible scratching.

How did Jane feel about working with him again? Was any part of her, however small, happy at the prospect?

He was divorced now, so it wouldn’t be the same as before. He wouldn’t have to hide his admiration…or fight his attraction.

Yeah, right. Who was he kidding? After all he’d put her through, he was lucky she’d consented to work with him. Let alone anything more.

His phone rang. A client was in trouble. He’d been driving under the influence of alcohol when he’d had a traffic accident. His second that year.

Silently, Matthew swore at the stupidity of some people. “Here’s what you need to do…” he said.

Hours later, Matthew was talking to another client, this one in an even deeper mess, when he noticed the time. Ten minutes to seven. He scrolled down on his BlackBerry, then groaned. Derrick had a soccer game tonight, at seven-thirty.

In the past, Matthew had missed a lot of Derrick’s soccer games. But no longer. He’d vowed that this spring he would catch every game he possibly could.

He offered his client one last piece of advice, then scheduled a meeting for the following day. Quickly, he closed down his computer, then left the office. Derrick hated it when he came to the games dressed in his business attire, so he took the time to change at the Executive Club in the basement. That he might see Jane here crossed his mind, but he didn’t.

Finally, dressed in casual jeans and a sweater, he rode the elevator to the parking garage. Once he was behind the wheel of his Audi, he punched the address of the soccer field into the GPS.

Now that his son was in the league for older kids, he was expected to play all over Hartford. Matthew wasn’t familiar with most of the fields anymore, and the GPS had kept him from arriving late more than once.

As he drove past a burger joint, he realized he was starving. Hours had passed since that sandwich at noon. He longed to stop, but was afraid that if he did, he’d miss the opening kickoff. In the end, he arrived at the game five minutes early. The spring sky was cloudy, but rain didn’t appear imminent. As he headed for the bleachers, he spotted Gillian amid a group of other soccer moms. He settled on a bench as far away from her as possible.

He didn’t want his relationship with his ex-wife to be hostile—it wouldn’t be healthy for his kids. Yet he felt powerless to change things. Every conversation he tried to have with Gillian ended in an argument, with her making the same accusations and drawing the same—erroneous—conclusions as ever.

She hadn’t reacted to his arrival, yet he knew that somehow she had seen him. If ever he missed a game, she would be the first to call him on it.

His son’s team, the Blazers, was wearing blue-and-yellow uniforms. He searched for lucky number six, Derrick’s number, and spotted him goofing around with another kid, rough-housing on the sidelines.

Stuff like that never went on when Coach Keller was in charge, but of course Wally Keller wasn’t present today, and neither was his wife, Leslie. Andy Crosby, another of the soccer dads, was attempting to fill in. Judging by the flustered expression on his face as he jogged from one boy to another, giving instructions that were largely ignored, he wasn’t finding the job easy.

Coach Keller’s son, Daniel, was among the boys on the field, but Robert, Sarah Boutin’s brother, was absent. Matthew watched as Daniel, a large, athletic boy, took shots at the net. Matthew wondered if he’d been told what his father had been accused of. Did the other kids on the team know, too?

The referee blew his whistle and play began. The Blazers came out disorganized and weak, and five minutes into the game the opposing team scored. The team was hurting without their usual coach.

But something else was going on, Matthew realized. One of the Blazers’ midfielders went out of his way to jostle Daniel, who was playing center.

Well, that answered his question about how much the kids knew.

Poor Daniel.

By halftime the team was down two goals. The sun was low on the horizon and Matthew decided to use the short break in action to run to his car and grab his sunglasses.

To his discomfort, his ex-wife followed him.

Matthew's Children

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