Читать книгу Primal Heat - Crystal Jordan - Страница 10

Hours passed as they ghosted through the trees, dawn lightened the sky, and Farid’s clothes went from uncomfortably clammy to merely damp. His muscles throbbed, and the slight stagger to Bren’s stride told him she fared no better. The scent of water reached him long before the sound of a babbling brook. Thirst wrenched deep inside him, the hunger and fatigue he’d been pushing away suddenly demanding notice. “Let me see if the water is safe. Then we need to find food.”

Bren nodded. He heard her stomach gurgle loudly and she pressed her palm to her belly. “I like that plan.”

He noted the paleness of her face, the way stress pinched the skin around her mouth. She looked worn, battered. He wanted to take her in his arms and tell her he’d make everything right. He refused to let it shake him, this need to protect. It hadn’t been this strong since his family was still alive, but that meant little. It was mere possessiveness. It would pass once he tired of her. No lover had ever kept his interest long, and while fucking his One had been excellent, the novelty would surely wear off. It had to. He dismissed the concern from his mind.

Sighing, he stared into the rushing water for long moments before he settled on his haunches and dipped his fingers into the cool liquid. Scanning it with his senses, he found no living organisms. Bringing it to his nose, he smelled it for impurities, flicked his tongue out for an experimental taste. It was different from the water on Suen, but he found nothing wrong with it. “I believe it stems from the same source as the river. It should be safe to drink.”

“You’re sure?” Her voice had more than a hint of doubt in it. “We should probably boil it first.”

“You cannot bring yourself to trust me about whether or not the water is drinkable?” Irritation scraped over his nerves and he knew it shouldn’t. She’d spent months considering him her vilest enemy, only dropping her guard when his dreams melded with hers. It wasn’t as though he wanted her trust. Of course not. That would be irrational, and the rational side of him was what controlled the beast that always sought its mate. It was necessary to keep a tight grip on his animalistic nature, a constant struggle for his kind. He refused to fail, not the way Cilji had. Not the way his parents had.

“Fine, I’ll drink the water.” She knelt beside him, dipping her cupped palms into the brook. “If I end up sick and they overtake us because of it, I will find a way to get loose just to kick your ass. I didn’t go AWOL for nothing. I’m getting Emperor Kyber to agree to help before this is all over.”

He glanced at her. “I will do everything I can to help you convince him, Bren. I swear it.”

She blinked, a smile that was both shy and sweet crossing her face. He hadn’t even known she was capable of such an expression. “I…thank you. For coming, and for being willing to help.”

He liked that smile, liked that her gaze shone with something besides disdain and distrust, and hated that he liked any of it. He shouldn’t like her or want her to like him in return. He would use her for sex as she used him for his influence with the emperor. Nothing more. He arched an eyebrow, shoving any warmth he might feel for her to the deepest, darkest corner of his soul. “There, now, did you choke on those words before you got them out?”

A laugh bubbled out of her and she rolled her eyes at him, throwing her hands in the air. “You make it so hard to be civil with you.”

“So do you.” He shook his head when she stuck her tongue out at him. “Thus far, your entire planet has been an odd combination of fawningly welcoming and catastrophically vicious.”

“We’re a complicated bunch.” She smirked. “You don’t want to deal with us. Go away.”

He snorted and scooped up another handful of water to drink. “Yes, that’s going to solve your problems with Arthur now.”

“We wouldn’t have had these problems if you hadn’t shown up.” She sighed, and a wave of her powerless frustration billowed out from her like a cloud.

“I know.” He nodded, feeling some of that dissatisfaction himself. After all these months of futile negotiating, he understood her position very well.

A flicker of surprise crossed her expression. “You…know?”

“Of course. I am not stupid or unaware of the consequences of our arrival on your planet and people.” He leaned toward her, her delicate, feminine scent as heady to him as ever. He forced himself to consider the discussion at hand, not something that he’d had to do often as a diplomat. “You seem impervious to the damage you have caused to us though. Why is that, do you think? Is it truly that you think we brought it upon ourselves?”

“No. Yes. No.” Her slender, dark brows contracted, the inner conflict roiling out to touch him. “I don’t know.”

“A definitive answer. I like those.” He let a small smile tuck in one side of his mouth, wanting to soothe her, but not knowing how, and knowing that he shouldn’t care either way. What was so simple with other people in his profession was always complicated with his One. He didn’t like it.

She huffed out a breath and pushed to her feet. “Quit politicking me.”

“Quit oversimplifying the situation to make it suit you,” he retorted. He rose with her, towering over her. “There is no one who is entirely innocent here, but also no one who is entirely to blame. The nuances aren’t mere inconveniences; they are vital to understanding the true meaning of the problem.”

Which he’d been unsuccessful at discussing with any of the heads of state on Earth who would see him. America, especially, was stubborn in its need to have a clear right or wrong, winner or loser, black or white. It bespoke a young culture, not yet matured to a full grasp of their own place in the order of things.

“You can do all the detailed navel-gazing you want, but don’t miss the big picture…lives are at stake. Your people’s, my people’s. People have died and more are going to die unless we do something. You get to run off into space whenever Kyber finds his soul mate or whatever, but you leaving won’t solve the problem. Not anymore. Arthur will still be in power after you’re gone, and he’s not going to give up that power without a fight. And again—the big picture—that means innocent people will die.” She sighed, crossing her arms and drawing his gaze to her breasts. He could see the outline of her nipples through her shirt and his cock rose in eager response. She closed her eyes and shook her head. “I don’t…think you brought this on yourselves. It’s just that, as a soldier, it’s never a good thing to think too long or too hard about the damage you do to the enemy. You have to have some emotional distance from that or it’ll make you crazy. You don’t survive in the military long if you can’t make that separation between us and them.”

“You’ve survived as a warrior a long time, haven’t you?” He’d wager a great deal that she’d never had to struggle with this kind of gray area before, and he hated seeing the distress reflected in her expression.

“My entire adult life.” She nodded, eyes the color of the bluest ocean on Suen moving over his face. She looked so lost, nothing like the hardened soldier he knew her to be. He reached for her, wanting to protect her from this pain, but she flinched away. “Don’t. I can’t stand it when you touch me. It makes me want things I won’t do again. I’m not sure I can hold out if you put your hands on me.”

It shook him that she confessed such a thing to him, made herself vulnerable, and gave him information he could use against her. The beast within him grappled for control, willing to take whatever she offered. His muscles tightened as he fought his conflicting urges. The man wanted to run as fast as he could from the sweetness of her vulnerability because he liked it too much, and the more he learned of her, the more he liked her. Not good. Not good at all.

The man won the struggle and he forced himself to step back out of arm’s reach. He needed to get away from here, from her, before he gave into the feline’s desire to convince her how often what they’d done the night before would happen again. And again.

“You lost your weapon in the river, yes?” He pulled the razer out its holster and tossed it to her.

She caught it but gave him a questioning glance. “Unfortunately.”

“Keep my razer with you.” He jerked his shirt over his head, folded it in precise quarters, and set it on the ground.

“Wh-what are you doing?” Her fingers tightened on the gun, but her gaze locked on his bare chest, a throb of pure want passing from her to him and shredding his tenuous grasp on his self-discipline.

He unfastened his pants, shoving them down and stepping out of his boots at the same time as he pulled his legs free of his clothing. “Undressing.”

“Why?” Her gaze dropped to his hard dick, her lips parting. A pulse of her desire hit all his senses at once. The scent of her wetness, the need trickling through the mental connection he hadn’t been able to let go of entirely after they’d made love.

He was so close to dragging her to the ground whether she was willing to admit she wanted him or not that his hands shook. That kind of abandoning of self-restraint was his worst nightmare realized, was a step toward the kind of disaster that had claimed the entire Arjun line—everyone he had loved the most.

Rolling his shoulders forward, he stooped to let the beast within loose. A low buzz filled his ears, his psychic power melding and shifting with the feral instincts. White and black fur crisscrossed his arms in stripes. Dirt shoved under his claws as he hit the ground. His body twisted, his bones popped, and some of his muscles tightened while others loosened as he reformed into a feline.

He hissed, shaking from head to tail as he settled into the new shape. Turning on his haunches, he launched himself into the waiting brush. He sent Bren a final thought to answer her question. I am hunting. You wanted food, yes?

An hour later, Bren checked the waterproof watch strapped to her wrist for the twelfth time. Her body still scraped, bruised, and aching from the wild river ride and hours of hiking, she sat alone beside a small fire. She’d used the driest wood she could find to keep the smoke to a minimum. No need to advertise their location. A headache throbbed at her temples, hunger gnawing at her gut. She’d found some berries to eat, but other than that she was going to have to wait for Farid to return. If he did. She closed her eyes. At this point, she wasn’t sure what she’d do if he didn’t come back. He’d been her only plan, and a half-baked one at that.

If Emperor Kyber wouldn’t help her, she had no idea who else to turn to or how to get the whole world out of a pile of shit that was hip deep and only going to get messier from here. She didn’t even know how they were going to get to the emperor’s ship with Farid’s shuttle gone. How long would it take for his people to come looking for him? Would Farid and she be able to evade Arthur’s men long enough for them to hook up with the Sueni rescue party? So many complications, so many ways everything could and probably would go wrong.

She pulled in a deep breath, forcing herself to remain calm. This plan would work. It had to. People who didn’t even know the danger they were in yet were counting on her.

God, she was tired. Her eyes were gritty, her body heavy and sluggish. A chill mountain breeze whipped through her clothes, and she stretched her hands toward the fire for warmth. Farid’s razer lay across her lap, within easy reach. She needed sleep, but she couldn’t let her guard down while Farid was gone. Hell, she wasn’t even sure she could let her guard down while he was with her. A shiver ran down her skin, and she did her best to squelch it. She was too old to be this twitter-pated over a guy—the better part of two decades dating military men should have cured her of any illusions she had left about them.

He’d seen the opportunity to fuck her and he’d taken it. She hadn’t done a damn thing to resist him. The power of it still shook her, scared her, and pissed her off even more. At him and at herself. She shouldn’t have wanted it so much, but they both clearly had, and their lack of focus had almost gotten them both killed. More than their lives were at stake here, so they couldn’t afford to lose it again. This was one mission that could not fail. She wouldn’t let her sacrifice of everything she’d ever worked for be in vain.

A twig snapped to her left, and she had his gun in her hand before the feline Farid broke through the trees. His black-and-white-striped fur made him stand out in stark contrast to the rich brown earth and deep green leaves of the forest around them. He didn’t belong here. Alien.

Two rabbits hung from his mouth, blood dripping from his fangs. His gaze locked on her in that unsettling way only cats could manage. Her heart tripped and then raced. She felt trapped, hunted. Swallowing, she fought the urge to flee and slid his razer into her ankle holster. It was an awkward fit, but it stayed, and she felt better for having the weapon. Then she lifted her chin to stare back at him. The feral side of his nature shone from his eyes, and they gleamed like mirrors when the firelight hit them.

He approached her and dropped the rabbits at her feet. Take care of these, if you would.

The smooth, polite voice in her head was so at odds with the wildness she saw before her. She swallowed. “I wasn’t sure you’d come back.”

He tilted his head, a subtle tension running through his muscles. I said I was hunting for your food. Would I not have to return to give it to you?

His tone made her insides twinge with guilt. Clenching her teeth, she fisted her fingers in the legs of her jeans. His feelings were of no concern to her. “Why don’t you go wash up in the stream? I’ll get the food ready.”

Fine. The betrayed timbre turned icy and clipped, and she knew he was not happy with her.

It shouldn’t have bothered her. She shouldn’t want to make the man happy, but she couldn’t deny—at least to herself—that it disturbed her.

Considering he’d been her enemy only hours before, she had no real reason to trust him. Getting rid of Arthur was a benefit to him, and she wasn’t going to fool herself by thinking that a little sex, mental or physical, would change that he and his emperor would keep her around only as long as she was useful in achieving their aim. They’d said they were here to get a woman, a very specific woman that they hadn’t found yet. She could only pray that wasn’t a lie and that she wasn’t handing her planet over to a worse fate than Arthur had in mind for it. However, if they were lying, why hadn’t they attacked yet? Or counterattacked after Arthur had brought one of the Sueni ships down?

Her headache gave an especially vicious throb, so she gave up on going over what she’d already been over a million times.

When she looked up, he was gone, splashing into the brook to wash the crimson stains away. She shook her head and dealt with the rabbits, refusing to admit how deep her relief was that he’d returned safely. He was just her ticket to getting help from Kyber.

It wasn’t personal.