Читать книгу Blaming No One - Dan Inc. Whitman - Страница 8

I swear I did not pass this picture through Photoshop or any other type of trompe-l’oeil process.

Do dogs read English? If they did, would they follow the dictates of messages directed to them? Papua New Guinea has 0.01 percent of the world’s population, but 25 percent of the world’s languages. Could it be that American dogs are conversant in one or more of the latter?

My point here is that someone argued a case and came to a resolution. The bark lobbyists met the anti-barks, and a town hall process came up with a consensus, allowing all parties some measure of comfort.

I won’t say, “We are a litigious nation.” That is a commonplace. But it seems we reserve our rage and passions for trivia. Could this be a dark scheme to distract us from the real threats to our species, like climate change, children trafficked, Stinger missiles in the hands of drugged prepubescent boys, and intractable ethnic conflict?

I don’t begrudge people’s need to argue and find common solutions. I’m even glad that the town hall meeting has replaced, mostly, the use of the shotgun as a way of settling disputes. Neighbors within view of the sign in the photograph, however, have actually said to dog owners, “The value of my property is going down!” As well it might. Enmities remain and bitter feelings infiltrate the neighborhood. Man’s Best Friend poops recklessly in the space provided to do so. People reach new paradigms in finding things to differ over.

Humans are split into dualities: male-female, nomadic-sedentary, anima-animus... The one we deal with here, however, is...how to say...those who would live and let live, versus those who would tell us (and dogs) how and when to do their business, and at what decibel level. Call them orthodox versus laissez-faire, I guess.

For me, the orthodox are the enemy, but I would never say so to one of them, as I know I’d go straight to the wheel for breaking, or to the stake. I’m not saying they break and burn just for pleasure – surely they do so as a last resort after exhausting other means of convincing us to be like them.

But don’t they realize that a thousand girls a minute are being impressed into slavery world-wide, and that we will all die?

I would say they are stupid, but what do I know? I only know one to see one, and always try to step aside when they come after us laissez-faire people with a cleaver.