Читать книгу How to be Your Doctor’s Favorite Patient - David Claytor - Страница 14

“I’ve got one whopping case of heartburn, doc,” said Jasper Maycomb as he leaned forward on the examining table.

“Are you drinking again, Jasper?” asked Dr. Laura Bradbury, his physician, who had followed his successes and relapses with various drug rehab programs for the past twenty years.

“Not for the last two days. It feels like my stomach’s on fire if I drink anything, even beer. I need some of that acid-blocking medication you gave me a few months ago.”

“So you can get better, or so you can resume drinking?” Her patient’s hesitation gave her the answer. “I don’t want to prescribe the medication unless you agree to enter rehab again,” she told him.

“I promise,” he said, holding up his right hand, Boy Scout-style. “That last program at Mt. Cedars was pretty good. They said I could just call them if I ever needed more help.”

“Okay. I’ll put you back on the medication, but I’ll need to see you again next week.”

She did see Jasper the next week: not in the office, but in the emergency room, where he was found to have a bleeding ulcer. (His stomach had been feeling so much better on the medication that he didn’t think a quart of bourbon would hurt anything!)

Doctors like to help people get better and stay that way, so it’s frustrating when patients do things that defeat their efforts. It’s like digging a hole while someone else keeps shoveling dirt back into it.

Sometimes people think that they can continue to drink, smoke, and do drugs because modern medicine will always have a means to rescue them from the consequences of their behaviors. It’s not true. If you keep swimming with sharks, we can throw you a lifeline time after time, but sooner or later–you’re gonna get eaten.

 Don’t use illegal drugs.

 Don’t drink alcohol excessively (more than one or two drinks per day).

 Don’t smoke at all.

 Do expect your physician to counsel you (or, perhaps from your point of view, “lecture” you) regarding the above, even when you come into the office for unrelated reasons.

 Do ask your physician for her help if you’re trying to stop smoking, drinking, or using drugs.