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Chapter 1

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In the village of Carlisle, which is located in the depths of modern England, near the summit of the mountain Dweormount, and surrounded by a wood called Fey Forest there was born a boy called Alfred Perkins. There was nothing particularly remarkable about Alfred’s birth. He was born on 25 March with no pomp or circumstance. There were no shining stars in the sky that day that ought not to have been there. Nothing particularly special happened in the village to signify the birth of this boy. No, he was born like any other child.

His parents’ named him Alfred after stories an old man in the village told. They loved this old man, a certain Mr. Oliver Cyning, and made him Alfred’s godfather at his christening. The priest who presided over the christening was an elderly man, a certain Fr. Nicholas. He was aided by his curate, Fr. Stratford. Fr. Nicholas, bathed the boy Alfred and blessed him. Alfred’s parents then held a celebration at their home.

The Perkinses were the landlords of an old fashioned style inn, which was well known for the quality of its beer and the scrumptiousness of its food. The Broken Spoke, for so the inn was named, did not have any of those trendy things one finds in pubs throughout the rest of England, or that can be found in nearly every bar in America. It lacked televisions, gambling machines, and loud music (unless it was one of the local bands who played there on occasion). The layout was more like a mismatched home than a restaurant and that is just how George and Jessica, Alfred’s parents, liked it.

Most nights, if you were to enter The Broken Spoke, you would likely hear Mr. Cyning telling one of his stories. They were typically stories of the fantastical and dealt with local myths and legends. As Alfred grew into boyhood, he came to love these stories. Most days would either find him sitting in the pub listening to Mr. Cyning or running about in Fey Forest pretending he was having his own adventures.

Typically when he returned from these jaunts he would make his parents and godfather sit down and listen to his stories. One day, when Alfred was about ten years old he came home with a rather different story. He gathered his parents and godfather into one of the rooms of the pub and began: “You’ll never guess what I saw today.”

“A bird,” said his mother.

“A deer,” said his father.

“A mushroom,” said his godfather, “as big as your head.”

“Nope,” he replied, looking pleased that they had not guessed. “You’ll never guess.”

“Well then, tell us, Alfie,” his mother replied.

“Today, I saw a fairy or maybe it was a pixie. I don’t know the difference yet, but I saw one all the same. It was taking care of some wild flowers in the forest. It had tiny little wings and very long arms.”

“Did it, now?” his father said with a grin.

“What did it say, Alfie?” asked his mother. His godfather sat in silence.

“Why it didn’t say anything, Mum. It just went about its business until it noticed me and then flew away fast. I tried to follow it, but it went up, up into the trees where I could not follow.” He said this with a hint of sadness.

“Don’t fret, my boy,” said his father clapping him on the back. “I’m sure there will be more opportunities for you to hunt fairies in the forest.”

“Oh no, Father. I would never hunt them, I only want to watch them and learn what they do.”

“Quite right,” chimed in his godfather. “It wouldn’t do to go hunting fairies, you never know what might happen. They can be mighty mischievous. Why I know one story about a group of brownies who had something to say about the name and running of this inn.”

“I’ve never heard that one. Do tell it, Mr. Cyning,” said Alfred excitedly. His parents smiled, having heard the story many times before themselves.

Mr. Cyning, sat up straight and began the story, “The Broken Spoke had just been finished. It was not, however, called The Broken Spoke to begin with. Originally, it was called The Tarnished Bell. It was called Tarnished Bell because the tavern owner Henry Bucklin, great grandfather of the Mr. Bucklin who sold The Broken Spoke to Thomas Brandy nearly thirty-five years ago now, has it really been that long. . . Where was I?”

“It was named The Tarnished Bell because Henry Bucklin—”

“—Because Henry Bucklin used an old, lacklustre bell to let people know when the tavern was open. He hadn’t quite set on a name until he heard two of his patrons out and about in town say, ‘Oi, are you going to the tarnished bell this evening?’

“‘You know I am, Wilfred, we go there every evening and enjoy a few pints. I tell you, I don’t know what I’d do if it weren’t for the tarnished bell. I sometimes think I live to hear it ring in the evenings, work bein’ what it is and all. Well, I see you there after work Wilfred.’

“‘Right then, I’ll see you tonight, Franklin.’

“‘The Tarnished Bell,’ thought old Henry Bucklin to himself, ‘that isn’t a bad name for my tavern, not a bad name at all.’ So the next day Henry set about making the sign. He worked well into the evening to the point where he fell asleep with the sign unfinished.

“Now, there happened to be a group of brownies that lived near the tavern.”

“What exactly are brownies?” asked Alfred.

“Brownies are small creatures, not more than six inches high, most of them. They’ve got little mouse like tales and long whiskers on their faces. Other than that they look much like miniature versions of people. Now, the thing about brownies is they don’t have proper surnames when they’re born.”

“Why not?” asked Alfred.

“It’s just the way brownies are, they’re proud folk and prefer to make it on their own. So, instead of each father passing his surname on to his children, the young brownies must find their own surname. And before you ask how, I’ll tell you. Brownies have to earn their surnames by doing something for a human. I see you’re still confused. Have you ever heard the story about the old cobbler who was working on a fancy pair of shoes and fell asleep with them unfinished?”

“Yes,” replied Alfred.

“Well, as most people tell the story who is it that helps the old cobbler?”

“Elves, I always heard it was elves.”

“And that is where everyone gets it wrong, it was not elves that helped the old cobbler, but brownies and that old cobbler was more then likely none other than Alfgar’s father. You remember Alfgar, the lad in the story about the goblin attack on this very city. Very good. Anyway, on top of all this Father Christmas’s helpers aren’t elves, elves aren’t even tiny, no, Father Christmas’s helpers are brownies.”

“Really?” said Alfred with excitement in his eyes.

“Yes, really. Now then, the brownies had been watching for some time to see if there wasn’t a way they could earn their names, and this was it. “The old man has finished carving the sign, it simply needs to be painted we could become Painters and have our surnames, finally,” said Alan, who was the leader of this small group of brownies. The brownies agreed that this was their best chance, so after Henry Bucklin fell asleep they sneaked into his room in the tavern and finished painting the sign for him. They toiled all through the night creating beautiful colors as only a brownie can. You see brownies, as soon as they set to a task, become extremely efficient at it. It’s why a brownie must choose carefully what job they want to do, because once they choose they’ll only be good at that job and it is very hard for them to change vocations, but that is a story for another time.

“The following morning, when Henry awoke, he looked down and saw the finished sign. ‘I must have finished it during the night and have forgotten about it,’ said Henry to himself. Now this greatly angered the brownies—”

“Why?” asked Alfred.

“Well, you see lad, there are actually two parts to a brownie’s receiving his surname. The first is doing something helpful for a human. The second, however, is the human thanking the brownie or brownies involved by acknowledging their work as their own, or simple confusion over who has done all the work for him. When Henry did neither, but assumed he had finished the work, the brownies grew outraged because they had notreceived their surnames. ‘All right lads,’ said Alan in a hushed voice. ‘If this old codger isn’t going to recognize us as the finishers of his work then we’ll have to cause him some mischief.’

“I highly recommend, if you can ever help it, lad, never anger a brownie. He takes on many impish tendencies when you do and he will find a way to cause you harm or at least extreme annoyance.

“Well, for the first week or so after the brownies had finished Henry’s sign, things went well for him, people were frequenting the Tarnished Bell, travellers liked the rooms enough to recommend them to others, everything was running smoothly. It was at the height of his success that the brownies struck.

“It started with a few horses getting knots in their tails, right outside the Tarnished Bell. Then horses’ shoes would come loose while they were tied up outside of the Tarnished Bell. When this did not produce the desired effect, the brownies decided to make matters worse. ‘Here’s what we’ll do,’ said little Alan the brownie, ‘we’ll start breaking the wheels of both passing and standing carts in front of the tavern,’ and break them they did. Men would come out of the tavern and find all of their spokes broken. Carts that were driven past the tavern would first have their horses spooked and then the cart would come crashing down as the wheels shattered under their own weight. Upon inspection, they would notice tiny little nicks in the spokes. The brownies used the little knives that all brownies keep to do the dirty work.”

“Why do brownies keep little knives?” asked Alfred.

“They keep the knives much like we do pocketknives, you never know when one might come in handy. The only difference is that a brownie’s knife is much stronger and sharper than our pocketknives and can cut through almost. anything. Now where was I?”

“The brownies were using their knives to cut the spokes of cartwheels.”

“Ah yes, this caused Henry much trouble, as he was unsure as to the reason of these occurrences. On top of that, patrons of the tavern visited less often and most. spoke of the tavern as the home of the broken spokes.

“Henry was unsure of how to handle this problem and called upon Alfgar to help him. While these events took place before the great Goblin attack, Alfgar was still noted as an individual who understood these strange occurrences. ‘Alfgar, my friend, I’m at a loss, I don’t know what’s going on.’

“‘I’ve seen this before,’ said Alfgar. ‘So have you, Henry.’

“‘I have?’ questioned Henry.

“‘Yes, Henry, remember a few years ago when my father, Hedley, had problems with the shoes he was making? The stitching would come undone as people walked away. Sometimes as they put on their new shoes, they would go to leave the store and find their shoes had been tied together by the lacing. It was awful.’

“‘Yes, yes, I remember. What happened, had your father angered some spirits?’

“‘Spirits? Not exactly. Brownies. Father went to sleep one night working on a particularly difficult pair of boots for the mayor and they were to be finished by morning. Well, a couple of brownies undertook it to help my father. In the morning, he assumed that he or I, without remembering, finished the boots and thought no more about it. This made the brownies angry, so they plagued the devil out of my father until he realized what happened.’

“‘What did he do? How did he get them to stop?’

“‘Simple, he walked up to the mayor and told him that brownies had finished the boots. The mayor was confused, but my father was adamant and that was enough for the brownies. In your case, however, more drastic measures may be needed.’

“‘I’ll do whatever it takes to make the little devils stop.’

“‘I wouldn’t recommend you start by calling them names, they’re no more related to demons or angels than you or I. Anyway, here’s what we must do. You say that they have been breaking the spokes of your customers’ and passers’ by carts and wagons?’

“‘Aye, that they have. It’s gotten so bad some people are beginning to call my tavern home of the broken spokes.’

“‘That’s it. That’s perfect.’

“‘What is? Tell me, please, Alfgar.’

“‘We’ll rename the tavern. Tonight, you and I shall make a new sign for the new name of your tavern.’

“The following day, when people heard the old tarnished bell being wrung to announce the opening of the tavern, they were astounded at what they saw. Below the sign of the Tarnished Bell hung a new sign, that of a cartwheel with a broken spoke. The people were confused and when they asked Henry he simply said, ‘Credit where credit is due.’

“It’s said that Henry later met with the Painter brownies and that they made him a new sign in place of both the one they made and the one Alfgar and Henry put together, and that that is the sign we see today protected by the brownies’ magic from wear and tear.

“It’s also said that Henry made a deal with the Brownies never to change the name of the tavern out of respect for them.

“And there you have it lad, the story of The Broken Spoke Brownies.”

Alfred was delighted with the story and he clapped loudly. His parents smiled, loving that the inn they had purchased not long after arriving in Carlisle was so storied. Life went on in much this way for some time, Alfred telling stories of seeing all manner of fantastical creatures in the forest, and Mr. Cyning telling them fairy-stories about the village of Carlisle. It was not, however, to last.

On the Edges of Elfland

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