Читать книгу Holiday Defenders - Debby Giusti - Страница 19

NINE

As the rising sun cast a pink glow across the horizon, Nick raised binoculars to his eyes and studied the surrounding terrain. The snow had stopped falling, and a surreal stillness had settled over the mountain.

He breathed in the cold morning air, appreciating the beams of sunlight that brightened the day and his mood. Last night, he’d anticipated trouble. This morning, he felt upbeat and encouraged. Maybe they’d eluded the killers, after all.

Nick checked his watch—7:00 a.m. Over the past few hours, he’d thought about Jeff and what had happened in Afghanistan. Needing closure, he pulled out his cell, inserted the battery and found the number in his phone log—a number he never thought he would call again. He tapped in the digits and waited for Mr. Santori to answer.

“It’s Captain Nick Fontaine, sir. Jeff’s friend. We were together in Afghanistan. I hope I didn’t wake you.”

“Not at all. I’m an early riser. I’m glad you called, Nick. I need to apologize.”

“How’s that, sir?”

“For the way I treated you. I was grieving and not thinking straight at the funeral, which I hope you can understand. Jeff was my only child. He...” Mr. Santori’s voice faltered. “He was my life.”

“Jeff was an outstanding solider and a great friend, sir.”

“And the best son a man could have. I miss him, and for that reason, I struck out at the army, and I’m afraid you got my wrath, as well. I talked to Jeff’s wife. She helped me see the truth.”

“The truth, sir?”

“That you only wanted to protect Jeff. You traded your own vest, the new model, for his older one, never realizing the new vest was substandard.”

For a second, Nick didn’t know how to reply. How could the man be so forgiving? Nick’s intent back on that awful night didn’t matter—what mattered was that his actions were the reason Jeff hadn’t been protected. Uncomfortable with the direction the conversation had taken, Nick tried to turn it to the reason why he’d called.

“I believe the problem was with the ceramic plate inserts, sir. Some of them failed. The vests were made by Stratford and Castings.”

“They’re an East Coast company?”

“Yes, sir. Their main plant is outside Baltimore. With your connections, I hoped you’d be able to determine if they made the ceramic plate inserts, as well, sir.”

Mr. Santori hesitated, and when he spoke again his voice was thick with emotion. “Jeff was a hero. He died protecting our country.”

“You’re right, sir. Your son was a hero. Focus on that, and forget anything that brings pain.”

“The pain comes from knowing our soldiers are fighting with vests that don’t offer enough protection. I’ll contact a friend in Congress and pass on what you told me.”

“Thank you, Mr. Santori.”

“Please accept my apology. Men like you are few and far between, Nick. You chose to sacrifice your own well-being for my son’s safety. I will be forever grateful.”

“I was just doing my job. I wish I could have done more.”

Mr. Santori’s involvement might bring the substandard vests with the faulty plates to the attention of the powers that be. Hopefully, before more soldiers were injured.

He was pleased with Mr. Santori’s promise to help, but still bewildered by the rest of the call. Did he really believe that Nick had done the right thing, even though the results had been so unexpectedly tragic? Others had tried to reassure Nick—his commanding officer, the men in his unit, even Jeff’s wife—but he hadn’t wanted to listen. Mr. Santori’s anger at the funeral had only bolstered his opinion that he was to blame for making the wrong choice.

He didn’t know what to do with Mr. Santori’s apology, or his explanation that his words had come from his grief rather than a genuine belief of wrongdoing on Nick’s part. He could definitely relate to the anger and pain Jeff’s dad had described. Nick had felt them himself at losing his friend. Had he allowed his own self-chastisement to get out of hand, to build into a weight of guilt he wasn’t meant to carry?

Mr. Santori had forgiven him. Was it possible for Nick to forgive himself?

* * *

Lizzie woke to find Nick gone. She crawled from the sleeping bag, careful not to wake Joey. The coolness of the cave and the cloying scent of the musky earth surrounded her. Wanting to ensure Nick was okay, she headed to the entrance and blinked at the bright sunlight as she stepped into the clearing outside.

The beauty of the new-fallen snow and the sparse landscape of pines and jagged rock greeted her. No wonder Nick loved the mountain.

“Lizzie.”

At the sound of his voice, relief swept over her.

“You’re up early,” he said from a rock perch to her right.

“And from the looks of the rolled-up sleeping bag, you didn’t rest at all.”

“I’ve been checking the valley.” He held up the binoculars in his hand. “Everything looks calm this morning. They’ll probably wait until nightfall before they return.”

“But you expect them to come back?”

“I’m sure they’re still looking for whatever it was they wanted to find. Now that it’s daylight, let’s check Zack’s files again. We should have a few hours of battery life left on his laptop.”

“The children will sleep for a bit longer. They’ll be hungry when they wake.”

“I’ve got a small camp stove we can light. There’s enough draft in the cave and it’s large enough that we don’t have to worry about fumes. I’ll boil water for coffee and make something hot for the children. Instant oatmeal sound okay?”

“Perfect.”

After a quick glance at the valley, he lowered the binoculars and hopped down from his perch. “Let’s head inside.”

He put his arm on her back, and together they walked into the cave where, good to his word, he quickly prepared instant coffee that provided warmth. Adding sugar and dried creamer made it more than palatable.

The oatmeal filled a hole in her stomach, although it did little to ease the nervous anxiety she felt each time she thought of Zack. Did he have food and shelter and something warm to wrap his hands around?

“Oh, please, God,” she whispered, surprised when Nick looked up.

“I know you’re worried.” His gaze was filled with concern.

She nodded. “I was thinking about Zack.”

“I tried to call him this morning but didn’t get a response.”

“Do they have him?” she asked, almost afraid to hear Nick’s answer.

“He’s okay.”

“How can you be sure?”

“I know Zack.”

“You knew him years ago, before he lost his wife and became so reckless, despite his two children, who should make him be more cautious.”

“Zack was born to be an investigator, Lizzie. His work gives meaning to his life.”

“His children should come first,” she insisted.

“And they do, but he has a job to do. For me, that’s the military. For him, it’s exposing corruption and righting wrongs.”

“You mentioned the military.” She pulled in a ragged breath. “Aren’t you afraid when you go into combat?”

“Of course I worry about what could happen. Everyone does. Anyone who says otherwise isn’t being truthful. My mission is to defend my country. To fight for what’s right, for freedom, for truth. I wouldn’t be able to look myself in the eye if I didn’t do my job.”

Nick was telling her that he lived with danger and always would. Was this the way life would be if she were with Nick? Always afraid? Always looking over her shoulder?

Lizzie shook her head ever so slightly. Why was she even thinking about a future with Nick? He’d just told her how important the military was to him. He had a job to do that didn’t include her. Was that why he’d left her behind all those years ago—because he’d known that he wanted to go serve his country, and that that would mean letting her go so his mission could come first?

Mary Grace stirred. Her eyes blinked open, and concern momentarily clouded her face. She dug her hand into the sleeping bag, pulled her Nativity set free of the bedding and smiled at Lizzie.

“Morning, Sunshine. We’re having a campout and a special breakfast.” Lizzie kept her voice light. “How about something warm to eat?”

“My tummy’s hungry.”

“I’m sure it is. Get up quietly so you don’t wake Joey.”

Mary Grace climbed from the sleeping bag and gave Liz a hug. “When will Daddy come to get us?”

“Soon, honey. I hope very, very soon.”

If only Zack would think of the children and stop placing himself in danger.

She glanced at Nick. He wouldn’t change, either, and she could never ask him to be anything other than the brave man he was. Nick was good and strong and determined to make a difference.

She had to stop blaming him for hurting her in the past. He’d chosen a path that didn’t include her, but it was a noble and honorable path. She shouldn’t blame him for choosing it over her. As soon as the danger had ended, he’d return to Fort Rickman and the military. Future deployments and assignments around the world would take him far from Lassiter and far from Lizzie. That was the reality she needed to accept. No matter how much she wished their reunion could grow into a relationship, her time with Nick would be short-lived.

She needed to steel her heart. Nick Fontaine would walk out of her life again.