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13 NO THANKS

alkyrie clung on to Skulduggery and she wasn’t screaming any more. She was laughing. He was in a standing position and he moved them quickly through the air with an unnerving casualness. This was what he must have meant by the new tricks he’d taught himself. She looked down. All that empty space beneath them, added to the reality of what they were doing, took her breath away. Then she looked up, at the red sky, and saw the winged beasts swooping down.

Skulduggery altered course, avoiding the claws of the nearest beast. They spun in place then shifted left and a second beast missed them, screeching its displeasure. It was dangerous up here, even more so than in the city, and they flew back over the streets. They dodged another flying creature and passed over the riders, until Skulduggery found a suitable place to touch down. They landed and hurried through a door, into the quiet gloom.

“You can fly,” she whispered.

“I got bored walking everywhere,” he said.

“Can you teach me to fly?”

“You’ll need to master everything else about Elemental magic first, but yes. If we live through this, and if you continue your training, and if you’re real, then yes, I’ll teach you to fly. I’ll teach every Elemental to fly. It’s fun.”

“What else can you do?”

He looked at her and cocked his head. “Lots.”

A shape loomed in the doorway and Valkyrie’s smile vanished. They backed away as the Faceless One came through. Skulduggery clicked the fingers of both hands then thrust them out straight. Twin streams of flame hit the Faceless One, enveloping it completely. Valkyrie stared in amazement. The flame streams were continuous, like two flame-throwers. She’d never seen Elemental magic used like that before – she hadn’t even known it could be. But it wasn’t enough to stop the Faceless One or even slow it down.

Skulduggery cut off the fire and retreated. “It never works,” he muttered. “Nothing I do ever works.”

Something bright caught Valkyrie’s eye and she looked past the shambling form that had once been Batu, through the door it had come through, and saw the yellow portal.

“The gateway!” she said. “It’s open!”

“You better get going then,” Skulduggery said dully. His hands had dropped by his sides and he’d stopped walking backwards.

“Come on!” she yelled.

“The mind plays such cruel tricks,” he murmured.

Valkyrie ducked past the Faceless One. It turned its head to her then refocused on Skulduggery. She had a clear run to the portal. “Skulduggery!”

“You’re not real.”

“Please!”

The Faceless One held up its hand and Skulduggery moaned a little. His legs buckled and he dropped to his knees, his bones shaking.

“I have done terrible things,” he managed to say.

The riders were running through the streets towards them. The ones out in front had almost reached the portal. She couldn’t let them go through. Fletcher would shut it all down if they started coming through.

Valkyrie put on her coat and ran into the sun. She pushed at the air, throwing two riders off their feet. A third slashed at her with his dagger, but she blocked with her sleeve and fed him a faceful of fire. She kicked him back and whipped the shadows at another, catching him across the chest and sending him to the ground. A rider fell on her from behind and got her in a headlock. She kneed the muscle of his thigh and brought her fists crashing against his kidney and groin, then flipped him over her leg and stood on his throat.

She turned and a fist smashed into her cheek. She staggered, overbalanced and fell. The rider came in to kick her, but she jammed her left foot against his shin and swung her right foot over and back so that her heel connected with the back of his knee. She twisted and he yelped as he fell forward, his leg caught in a lock. She rolled over him and heard his leg crack. He screamed.

She threw a fireball that ignited the furs of a rider who was about to touch the portal. He shrieked and danced away, but now there were riders everywhere, coming in from all sides, and Valkyrie turned and turned again, fists raised.

“Skulduggery!” she shouted. “Help!”

And then China Sorrows appeared through the portal.

Tattoos glowed as she flung a wave of blue energy into the riders before they had a chance to even react. She hurled daggers of red light and dodged a rider who came at her with a sword. She slammed her forehead into his face and then went to work on his friends.

Valkyrie launched herself at the rider who tried to sneak up on China from behind. She snatched the knife from his hand and pushed at the air to shoot it straight into the leg of another.

“Skulduggery?” China demanded, breaking a rider’s wrist and jabbing her fingers into his eyes.

A rider yanked Valkyrie’s hair and she stepped back and rammed her elbow into his nose. “In there,” she panted. “With a Faceless One.”

“Skulduggery Pleasant!” China roared. “Get out here at once!”

Valkyrie covered her head as two riders leaped at her, but when they didn’t land she looked up. They hung in the air, quizzical expressions on their faces, and then hurtled back as Skulduggery stumbled from the doorway, his arm outstretched.

“Two of you,” he said, sounding surprised. “But my hallucinations never travel in pairs…”

Valkyrie grabbed his hand and pulled him from the door as the Faceless One reached out to drag him back. China kept the riders away then she took hold of Skulduggery’s other hand and all three of them jumped into the portal.

Yellow flashed bright and was gone, and something tangled with Valkyrie’s legs and she fell. Instead of falling on to hard ground and sand though, she fell on to grass, still wet from hours-old rain.

She blinked her sight back, realising she had tripped over Skulduggery’s feet and that they had both fallen. China had stayed upright of course, and she was commanding Fletcher to close the gateway. Valkyrie watched the portal shrink down almost instantly, then vanish.

They stood up and Fletcher stepped out of the circle. They all watched Skulduggery as he looked around at Aranmore Farm.

“Good God,” he said softly. “I’m home.”

“How are you?” China asked. For the first time Valkyrie noticed the blood on China’s clothes and how pale she was.

Skulduggery’s head tilted and he paused a while before answering. “I’m fine,” he said. “You’ve been shot.”

“I’m OK now.”

Fletcher walked up and handed over the Murder Skull. “I think this is yours.”

Skulduggery took the skull in one hand and looked at it. “Handsome devil,” he murmured. And then, “Why are there unconscious people lying around the place?”

“Guild sent some of his agents to stop us,” China said. “There are probably more on the way.”

“Then let’s not be here when they arrive.” He looked at Valkyrie and took a moment. “You saved me,” he said.

“I did,” she said.

She was expecting a hug. She didn’t get one.

“Good job,” said Skulduggery and started walking.

Skulduggery Pleasant: Books 4 - 6

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