Читать книгу Modern Romance November 2019 Books 1-4 - Эбби Грин - Страница 21

DRAKON SAT BACK in his chair and twisted the stem of his wine glass between his fingers as he studied his wife who was sitting opposite him in the large dining room of his Mayfair apartment. Candlelight flickered over the polished table and over the dark, coiled gloss of her hair. ‘Did I mention that I need to go to Singapore tomorrow?’ he questioned.

Lucy looked up from her bowl of Greek lemon chicken soup, her spoon suspended in mid-air. ‘No, you didn’t.’ A frown criss-crossed her brow. ‘Tomorrow? Just like that? Without any kind of warning?’

‘That’s business, Lucy.’

‘It seems to be a very demanding business.’ She hesitated. ‘When you always seem to be working.’

He shrugged. ‘Billion-dollar empires don’t just happen without someone putting in the legwork.’

‘It would be nice…’ her voice trailed off and, once again, she seemed to be picking her words carefully ‘…if you could spend a little more time with your son.’

Drakon felt a flicker of irritation because that felt almost like a criticism, and it was not in her remit to criticise him. But why not placate her when he was going away tomorrow, by wiping that look of uncertainty from her face? ‘That will happen,’ he said. ‘When things are a little quieter.’

She looked unconvinced and maybe he couldn’t blame her for that because, in truth, his heart was not engaged in fatherhood. He could see her hesitating, worrying her teeth into her bottom lip as if she was trying not to say something, but she said it all the same.

‘Do you have to go, Drakon?’

She tried to keep the question casual but in this she failed because it was a refrain he’d heard from women countless times over the years and Drakon tensed—because didn’t her words almost justify his intended trip? Didn’t they reinforce what he suspected was her growing emotional dependence on him and make him aware of the subtle ways she was trying to steer him away from his work? But she had to understand that no way was he going to take his eye off the ball, because he’d seen what could happen if you did. He was still his own boss and a man who answered to nobody—not to his adopted baby and certainly not to his wife—and the sooner she realised that, the better.

Steeling his heart against the reproach in her eyes, he shrugged. ‘I’m afraid I do,’ he answered coolly. ‘I don’t know if I mentioned that we’re trying to extend our oil refinery—’

Her voice sounded stiff. ‘No, I don’t believe you did. You don’t exactly encourage me to keep up with what’s going on in your empire, do you?’

Ignoring the underlying complaint in her question, he picked up a piece of home-made pitta bread. ‘Amy hasn’t been able to get anywhere with the government. She keeps coming up against opposition—she suspects it’s because she’s a woman—and I really do need to be there.’

‘Of course you do.’ But Lucy put her soup spoon back down on the plate, her appetite suddenly deserting her. Was that because, although Drakon was going through the motions of sounding apologetic, the anticipation in his voice suggested he really wanted to go off on a last-minute trip to the Far East? And wasn’t the truth of it that he probably felt trapped in a marriage he’d never really wanted?

Because the honeymoon was over. At least, that was how it seemed to her. Within twenty-four hours of returning to London from Prasinisos, life had picked up a new routine and Lucy realised just how much time she was expected to spend on her own. Drakon had resumed what she was to discover were his habitual twelve-hour days at the office, leaving her at home with Xander, Sofia and the rest of his large contingent of staff.

She took to rising deliberately early in order to eat breakfast with her husband before he left for the office, knowing he wouldn’t return until dinner time. Because what was the point of being married if you never got to see the man you’d married? At least when she was pouring strong coffee and offering him a croissant—which he would invariably refuse—she felt as if she was going through the motions of being a married woman. But only at night did she feel like a real wife, when Drakon undressed her and took her into his arms. When he made her cry out with disbelieving pleasure as his lips and fingers and tongue opened up her senses. Her breasts would grow full and aching—her nipples pebbling into tight little bullets as he grazed at them hungrily with his teeth. She opened her legs and took him deep into her body, his hard heat filling her and making her feel, well… complete. Was it crazy to admit that was the effect he had on her? Suddenly she could understand all those things she’d read about successful sex—as if some kind of transformational magic had taken place between two people.

Afterwards she would lie in his arms, her ear pressed close to his chest, listening to the dying thunder of his heart. Their legs would still be entwined and she could feel the sticky trickle of his seed on her thigh as she longed for him to say something—anything—which would make her understand just how he really felt about her. But there was nothing—which made her conclude that he felt nothing. Inevitably, he would fall asleep straight away, leaving Lucy lying there, her eyes adjusting to the mysterious shadows which seemed to be lurking in the corners of the vast room. Was this how it was going to be from now on, or was there a possibility that their incredible physical closeness might eventually lead to some kind of emotional bond?

The signs weren’t promising. At times, she still felt like something he had acquired—in the way he might acquire a new yacht. One morning he presented her with a credit card—a shiny platinum affair which glowed against the starched white linen tablecloth, as he slid it across the table towards her.

‘What’s this?’ she questioned blankly.

‘Surely you can work that out for yourself, Lucy.’

‘A credit card?’

‘I thought you’d be pleased. You need your own money,’ he added, in response to her blank stare.

‘But how can it possibly be my money when I haven’t earned it?’

It was a naïve question and maybe she deserved the answering elevation of his brows.

‘You could work a million hours a week and never earn a fraction of what I do,’ he said, his gentle tone not quite taking the sting out of his words. ‘You shouldn’t have to come to me every time you want to buy something. What if you want to get yourself a new car? Or redecorate the apartment? Put your own stamp on it. That kind of thing.’

Her own stamp. Lucy gritted an automatic smile as she poured him a cup of the strong black coffee he seemed unable to function without. His statement would have been funny if it hadn’t been so sad. Because how could she possibly make her presence felt when her brilliant billionaire husband dominated everything and everyone around him? She had no desire to change a beautifully decorated home just for the sake of it—because that would be a terrible waste of money and that wasn’t the way she had been brought up. But she was certainly going to have to find something to do with her days, other than help Sofia look after Xander.

Xander.

A lump rose in her throat. The child she was loving more with every day which passed. Was it knowing that he was going to be her only child which made her feelings for him so fierce and fundamental? Sometimes when Drakon was at the office she found herself staring down at the infant lying sleeping in his crib. The infant still largely ignored by his adoptive father—unless you counted the perfunctory kiss Drakon sometimes planted on his head if ever his return from the office managed to coincide with Xander being awake, which wasn’t often.

Sometimes Lucy found herself wondering if he timed his arrival home deliberately, to make it so. If he was determined to keep his distance. Why, even on Sundays—Sofia’s and the rest of the staff’s day off—the workaholic tycoon didn’t go out of his way to bond with his baby son, did he? He still managed to absent himself for long periods of time, going out for a sprint around Hyde Park and returning covered in spatters of mud with his black hair clinging in damp tendrils to his neck. Or holing himself up in his home office to read through long contracts with horribly small print.

True to his word, Drakon went to Singapore the very next day and was gone for two weeks. Two whole weeks with phone calls his only method of communication. He blamed their sporadic nature on the time difference between London and Singapore and maybe that was true. But to Lucy it felt as if they were a million miles apart, rather than six and a half thousand. All he seemed to want to talk about was how brilliantly the talks about extending the oil refinery were going. He even sent a photograph of him and Amy sitting in some plush restaurant in the famous Botanic Gardens of the city, having dinner with a load of government ministers. Lucy felt as if he were standing on the deck of a ship which was moving further and further away from her. And all she could wonder was whether this was how it was going to be from now on.

‘So, when are you coming back?’ she asked.

‘Tomorrow lunchtime. I’ve asked for the plane to be ready at midnight.’

Lucy spent the day trying to contain her state of excited expectation, but at the appointed hour she heard her phone ringing, rather than the welcome click of Drakon’s key in the lock.

‘Where are you?’ she said as his name flashed up on the screen.

‘Agape, forgive me.’ He paused. ‘A last-minute meeting was scheduled with the trade and industry minister.’

‘And you had to be there?’

‘Yes, of course I did,’ he said coolly. ‘Do you have a problem with that?’

Too right she did, but Lucy held back from saying so because the sensible side of her knew she was being unreasonable, while instinct told her she was only going to make matters worse if she turned this into a battle. Yet Drakon was worth fighting for, wasn’t he? For Xander’s sake mostly, but for hers too.

Because no matter how much she tried to tell herself it shouldn’t be happening, her feelings towards the man she’d married were growing—feelings which had never been part of their marriage deal. Unstoppable emotions which had been nurtured during their brief honeymoon and taken on a life of their own. She tried blaming it on her lack of experience, convincing herself that a woman who’d reached the age of twenty-eight without ever having sex would be in danger of mistaking physical pleasure for something else. Something which felt uncomfortably like love. And she didn’t want to love Drakon. The last thing she could afford to do was to waste her emotions on a man who’d told her right from the start that he didn’t believe in love. Because that would be a self-destructive course and would detract from something she could do. Something positive and good—which was to strengthen the bond between father and son.

Because if Drakon wanted their marriage to endure, which was what he said he wanted—then he couldn’t keep the baby at arm’s length the whole time, as he’d been doing until now. She didn’t think he was necessarily being unkind to Xander. It was just that he didn’t know how to love him because he had no experience of parental love to fall back on. Maybe he had to learn to be a good father another way, and maybe she could help…

So just do it, Lucy thought to herself. It’s no good complaining about the state of your life if you don’t do anything to try to improve it.

She spun into action that same day, signing up for family membership at the local gym which she sometimes passed on her way to the park. Mayfair didn’t run to budget gyms so the one she joined was eye-wateringly expensive, but it did have the benefit of a super-sized swimming pool. She tried it out a few times—in fact, her hair was still damp when Drakon arrived back from Singapore, his black eyes faintly bemused as he saw the drying locks of hair clouding around her shoulders.

‘What’s all this?’ he questioned as she went into his arms to kiss him.

‘I’ve joined a gym.’

‘That’s good,’ he said absently as his phone began to trill in his pocket.

She made no further mention of it until the following Sunday morning, just as Drakon replaced his empty coffee cup and told her he was going to read through a new contract in his study, but Lucy shook her head, feeling her heart pounding nervously in her chest.

‘I’d much rather you didn’t.’

There was a split-second pause. ‘I’m sorry?’

‘Not today, Drakon. I wonder…’ she licked her lips ‘…would you mind coming swimming with me and Xander instead?’

‘Swimming?’ he demanded. ‘Don’t be ridiculous. At his age?’

‘They can start lessons as early as four weeks,’ she informed him calmly. ‘In fact, he’s had a couple at the new gym already but they’ve got a class this morning and it would be nice to have some company.’ She sucked in a deep breath. ‘I think you might enjoy it. And before you trot out all the reasons why that’s not possible—can I just ask what’s the point of being one of the world’s most successful men if you take less time off than the average factory worker?’

Drakon met her resolute expression and felt a flicker of mild irritation at the fact that she was so openly defying him. Yet he couldn’t fault her logic, no matter how much he’d like to be able to. In fact, there was little about his new wife he could fault—and hadn’t that been the biggest revelation of all? She was…

He studied her.

She was surprising. She was like the first soft shimmering of spring after the harshness of winter. Like a welcome sea breeze which whispered over your skin on the hottest day of the year. Her skills as a mother had never been in question because Drakon had known exactly what he didn’t want from someone taking on that particular role. His mouth hardened. He’d wanted someone as unlike his own mother as possible—without her brittle exclusion of her own children, and her all-encompassing absorption in her philandering husband, and her preoccupation with her own appearance. He’d wanted someone soft and caring and honest and true. Someone with a heart and someone with a conscience—and Lucy had ticked all those boxes, and more.

He swallowed. Much more.

He hadn’t been expecting her to keep surprising him as a lover, nor imagined he would find it difficult to drag himself away from the seductive sanctuary of her arms each morning. Sometimes he would even find himself glancing at his watch at the end of a working day and itch to get away, but he forced himself to work as late as he’d always done, because independence was key to his success. Wasn’t that one of the reasons why his Singaporean trip had provided such a welcome relief and the space he needed? Because no way was he ever going to rely on another human being and open himself up to pain.

Yet Lucy wasn’t asking for the world, was she? She wasn’t demanding emotional reassurance, or expecting him to bolster her unrealistic dreams about marriage. She simply wanted him to accompany her while she took the baby swimming. Not the biggest ask in the world.

‘What time do you want to leave?’ he growled.

‘In about an hour.’

‘I have a couple of calls I need to make first.’

‘Of course you do,’ she said, with a smile which somehow niggled him.

The gym was only a short walk away, reached through an oasis of a garden square which was new to him, but then, it was a long time since he’d taken a walk in London just for the sake of it. Feeling like a man who had just emerged from a long sleep, Drakon heard the unmistakable sounds of birdsong coming from the bare branches of a tree, before peering down at a carpet of snowy white flowers whose white tips were pushing their way through the grass.

‘Snowdrops,’ said Lucy as she followed the direction of his gaze.

‘I know they’re snowdrops,’ he snapped.

He was slightly disconcerted to discover mixed changing rooms at the upmarket gym—he hadn’t been in any kind of changing room since uni—and by the way Lucy thrust a pair of impossibly tiny armbands at him.

‘Could you put these on Xander?’

He looked at them with a frown. ‘Can’t you do it?’

‘Well, I can, of course—but I thought you might like to.’

What could he say in response? That he had no desire to do so? That the thought of touching the baby filled him with dread because he was so impossibly tiny? Especially as a nearby blonde was openly listening into their conversation, her eyes devouring him in a predatory way he hadn’t come across in a while. Was that because he never really looked at other women any more, other than to compare them unfavourably to Lucy? He shot the blonde a glance before disdainfully averting his gaze. She was practically falling out of some skimpy bikini and he thought how much sexier his wife looked, clad in a sleek one-piece which hugged her toned curves.

He turned back to the task in hand and stared down at the tiny baby who was now cradled in the crook of his arm. It was a nerve-racking experience to slide on the armbands and he wanted to lash out at Lucy for making him do it, when he looked up and met the soft understanding shining from her blue eyes.

‘You’re doing just fine,’ she said softly. ‘Babies are stronger than they look and all dads feel funny at first. I’ve seen men the size of mountains looking completely lost when confronted with a newborn. You just need to do it more often. You know what they say. Practice makes perfect.’

But Drakon could hear his heart pounding. Pounding in a way he didn’t recognise. Xander was wearing a hooded little towel which made him look like a miniature caped crusader, but nothing could detract from his vulnerability, despite the fact that he was over three months old now. Drakon stared into black eyes framed by impossibly long lashes. He had his father’s eyes. Niko’s eyes, he realised with a wrench. But they were his eyes too, for hadn’t he and his twin brother been identical, sharing almost the same DNA? He stared down again at his adopted son and something inside him turned over and started to melt.

And that was how it started. Insidiously at first, but with gathering force—like the fierce Meltemi wind which blew through his homeland every summer—Drakon began an emotional connection with the child he had adopted.

He tried to deny it. To convince himself his life wouldn’t change in any way because he didn’t want it to change. He would play the part of husband and father, yes. That had always been part of the deal. But he would play it from a suitable distance, for that was how he operated. He was there to support Lucy in her role of mother, because that was her primary role. At times he’d started to wonder whether she truly understood and accepted the boundaries within their relationship, then something happened which made it clear he was going to have to spell it out for her.

The episode in question occurred when he was returning from a day trip of meetings in France and found his limousine waiting for him at the airfield. Unusually, the chauffeur remained in the driving seat and Drakon opened the rear door himself, to discover Lucy sitting on the back seat waiting for him—a vision in a silky dress which matched her eyes and suede high-heeled shoes in exactly the same colour.

‘Hi,’ she said.

‘Hi,’ he said, his eyes narrowing as some unknown fear clouded his heart. Something to do with Xander, perhaps? ‘Is something wrong?’ he demanded.

‘No, nothing’s wrong. I just thought it would be fun to come and meet you for a change.’ She crossed one pale, stockinged leg over the other and tilted him a smile he’d never seen her use before. It was a slightly nervous smile but also kind of…predatory.

His senses were on instant alert as he got in beside her, noting the tense atmosphere inside the tinted interior of the car. He could see that she’d floated up the soundproofed and darkened screen which separated them from his chauffeur, so they were in a private world of their own. As the powerful vehicle pulled away she leaned forward to kiss him, guiding his hand up her skirt to illustrate the fact that she wasn’t wearing panties. Before too long she had unzipped him and was straddling him, easing herself slowly down onto his rigid length and riding him as if they were in some kind of erotic rodeo. He felt compromised and manipulated but his desire for her was so intense that he had no choice other than to submit to her sexy ministrations. Even when inside her he tried to hold back—to make her wait for what he knew she wanted—but suddenly his seed was pumping out and he was moaning softly against her mouth.

It was undoubtedly the most stimulating homecoming he’d ever experienced—possibly because it was so unexpected. It was hard to believe this was the same blushing virgin he’d seduced on his Mediterranean island, and that disturbed him almost as much as this sudden reversal of control. He’d chosen her for her suitability and purity. Didn’t she realise that he had chosen her because he had wanted a mother for his son? If he’d wanted a vamp, he would have married one.

‘So what was all that about?’ he demanded, once he’d got his breath back.

She paused in the act of smoothing down her rucked skirt before looking up, and he was caught in the teasing crossfire of her bluebell eyes. ‘You didn’t like it?’

He didn’t respond to the feigned innocence in her voice. ‘I didn’t say that. I just wondered if there was any particular reason for such a mind-blowing homecoming and whether this is something I should expect every time I take a flight in future?’

Something in the repressive tone of his voice sent a shiver down Lucy’s spine. He was looking at her with a stony expression in his black eyes, which somehow contradicted his passionate response, and she felt a worm of worry wriggling away inside her. Should she tell him the truth? Should she confess she’d been concerned he might find too much domesticity and fatherhood stultifying and she wanted to reassure him that she intended to remain as exciting a lover as possible? But that might let too much light into her occasionally paranoid thoughts and make what had just happened seem almost…predictable. Surely it would be better to allow a little mystique to prevail. To keep her gorgeous husband on his toes and ensure he’d never get bored and want to walk away from her, because that was something she couldn’t bear to contemplate.

Still a relative novice to the game-playing of romance, she flicked him a smile. ‘You’ll just have to wait and see, won’t you?’

‘I guess.’

But her attempt to engage him again fell disappointingly flat for he picked up his briefcase and began rifling through it, effectively dismissing her. Quickly Lucy looked out of the window, terrified her gaze would betray her feelings, though he wasn’t actually looking at her. But if he was…

She swallowed. If he was then mightn’t he recognise that she was falling in love with her Greek husband, even though she knew there was no way he would ever return those feelings? Even though he now seemed to be in a strange kind of mood after she’d plucked up enough courage to travel to the airfield to seduce him. She never knew what was going on inside his head, because he rarely told her. Sometimes she felt as if they were growing further apart rather than closer, despite their cohabitation. Yet when he relaxed enough to let his guard slip…didn’t she adore the man who existed behind the brittle exterior he’d formed to protect himself? The man who’d suffered such a loveless childhood, which meant he kept all his emotions locked away. And didn’t she cherish a hope that his feelings for his son were growing—and would continue to grow if she could help facilitate that?

But it was hard to communicate with someone who was increasingly absent and Lucy’s growing sense of insecurity was fuelled by Drakon jetting off again. This time he was travelling to Indonesia with Amy and communication filtered down into the usual snatched phone calls, squeezed in around the time difference. Lucy kept herself busy with Xander and that was always a pleasure. A growing pleasure. With every day which passed the baby was growing more and more aware and when she went in to him each morning, she was rewarded with the sunniest of smiles. Sometimes he nuzzled his silky little head against her neck, and Lucy felt a pure joy which was almost painful in its perfection. He was just gorgeous. The most gorgeous little baby in the world.

She had just put Xander to bed, sung him a small medley of lullabies and was standing beside the crib watching him when she heard an almost imperceptible sound by the door and glanced up to see Drakon standing silhouetted there. Lucy’s heart leapt with instinctive longing but when he made no move to join her, she crept from the nursery to find him waiting for her in the corridor. After days of absence, his powerful body looked especially muscular and virile, though the expression on his dark face seemed much sterner than usual.

‘How long have you been standing there?’ she whispered.

‘Long enough.’

‘I wasn’t expecting you back until Friday.’

‘I know. I tried to ring a short while ago, but you didn’t pick up.’

‘I was bathing Xander.’

‘So I see.’ He smiled then. ‘Your hair is damp.’

Self-consciously, she patted the dishevelled strands. ‘I’d better go and tidy up. Don’t you want…to say goodnight to Xander?’

He shook his head. ‘I don’t want to risk waking him. I’ll see him in the morning.’ There was a pause. ‘Would you like to go out for dinner tonight, Lucy? Just the two of us. I thought we could try that new Italian restaurant in Knightsbridge.’

‘I’d love to,’ she said, a little breathlessly. ‘I’ll go and get changed.’

‘Why don’t you wear that green dress you had on the other night?’ he suggested carelessly, his words fading away as he walked towards one of the dressing rooms.

Lucy hurried away to get ready, wondering if she was just imagining that Drakon’s mood seemed…different tonight. Had something happened during his business trip to Indonesia? Had he met a woman and realised how constrained his life was by marriage to someone he was only with because it happened to be convenient? Was that why he had asked her to wear her admittedly on trend but least sexy dress, with its high ruffled neck and knee-length skirt?

She was silent in the car on the way to the restaurant but Drakon seemed too preoccupied with his own thoughts to notice. And it wasn’t until they were seated at a table at the far end of the discreetly lit eatery in Knightsbridge, with two Bellini cocktails sitting in front of them, that she plucked up courage enough to ask him. Because hadn’t he seemed more distant than usual, ever since that time when she’d surprised him at the airport in the back of the car? Moistening her lips with the tip of her tongue, she stared into the dark gleam of his eyes.

‘Is something wrong, Drakon?’

He paused for long enough to magnify all her unspoken fears. Long enough for her heart to begin pounding painfully hard in her chest. But what he said next made Lucy’s heart pound even louder.