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THE GREAT “BUT”

Every man regards his ways as clean in his own eyes; but the Lord weigheth the spirits.—Proverbs 16:2.

“But” says the wisdom of the Bible. For one who has once heard and understood this wisdom nothing can surpass this panoramic, significant, heavily-contended, biblical “but.” We can never be done hearing and comprehending it. One can divide the readers of the Bible into those who note it and those who note nothing of it. Not all the learned belong to those who note it—nor all the unlearned. All of us belong at times to those who note, oftentimes to those who do not note. “But” means that there is still something that is overlooked and forgotten, still something to be taken into consideration, there is still another possibility at hand. “But” signifies that in all of our thinking and speaking and perceiving and doing we must turn a sharp corner. A ship is traveling at full speed with both happy and sad travellers, with hardworking stokers and sailors aboard, ploughing forward, straight ahead,—“but” the man at the helm swerves the rudder around as he avoids a disaster, because a sandbank lay in the direct path of voyage. One simply cannot always sail straight ahead. A group of hikers are travelling a dusty highway, fretting because of the heat, complaining because of the length of the hike,—“but” one suddenly bends down and in the dust of the highway finds a gold coin. Many times it pays not to fret and complain, but to keep your eyes open; something quite different might suddenly appear. But these are only illustrations and parables. That something different to which the “but” of the Bible points, is the totally different which is expectantly waiting upon us, which comes to meet us, which might instantly appear to us to tell us that it was always there and that it will always be there. It may be that when it meets us we shall be filled with fear, or with joy, but that is not the main issue. Happy is that servant whom the Lord, when he comes, finds awake—that is the main issue.

The “but” in the Bible is the great “but” which is the cause of all these many little and littler “buts” which are to be found in our lives and in the world. It is the reason of all reasons, the reason why we humans must so often turn the corner, the reason why again and again we must learn to see things in a different light, to think differently and to speak differently. It reminds us of the Greatest which is often overlooked and forgotten, but which is to be respected, but not only does it remind us of the Greatest, but rather of the One and Only. Because we overlook this One, we overlook so much. Yet if this One is respected, then everything is respected. The “but” of the Bible reminds us of the sense of God which is prior to, behind and above, yet always in, the sense and the non-sense of man. In every moment it is the altogether new, in every moment it is the totally different possibility: even God! Shall we grow hysterical in the face of it? Shall we rejoice about it? Both are possible, sometimes both at the same time. More important is the question as to whether we will heed it. The Bible can be eye and ear to us whereby we can see what really is contained within our own lives. God is! This is what the people of the Bible say. And they ask us: Who sees? Who hears? Who believes our report, and to whom is the arm of the Lord revealed? That is the Bible’s “but.”

The Lord weigheth the spirits, says our text. One could say that this is just what the Bible tries to say. For the Bible does not always say the same thing over and over again, but it does say this one thing again and again: But the Lord weigheth the spirits. This is the same thing the Bible says on other pages: But he who dwelleth in the heavens shall laugh, he shall have them in derision!… But my words shall never pass away … But he was wounded for our transgressions and because of our sins was he smitten … But Christ is raised from the dead and has become the first-fruits of them that slept … The “but” of the Bible proclaims to us the existence and the deeds of God. Who is God? He who always confronts us as Lord, incomparable, startling, unforeseen, He who possesses all and is all, over against whom we are nothing and possess nothing, and from whom our possessions and existences come as the shadow does from the light. What does God do? He weigheth the spirits. The spirits are the spirits of men. We, too, are on His scales, examined of Him, judged by Him, put to the test by Him to see how much we are worth in His estimation. That is our life-situation, as seen from the point of view of God’s existence and deeds.

The next thing of importance is that we are being weighed. We ourselves weigh and are weighed. We make judgments as to good and evil, truth and falsity; we discriminate between the worth and the unworthiness of our experiences in various situations and achievements which confront us, between the words and the deeds of mankind as well as our own. From day to day and year to year we go through our existence with a scale in our hand more or less observantly testing. But where did we get these scales? How do we know what we simply cannot know? That is the novelty: with our tiny scale in hand we are ourselves in the great scale. Not only do we discriminate but we are being discriminated. We not only judge, but are being judged. We not only apprehend, but are being apprehended. An eye that sees me, an ear that hears me, a master who is proving me, a judge who is judging me, a king who chooses me or does not choose me—that is the final, deepest truth of my life and it is not merely my own seeing, hearing, testing, judging, and choosing.

We humans are apt to pass over this truth very often and with great unconcern. That is why we are so vociferous and forcible, especially in our complaints and indictments, as well as in our boastings and assertions. We overlook the fact that what we say must not be taken so seriously, no matter how serious it may be to us. What we say is not so important, but rather what is being said to us. That is why we are generally so disunited in our weighings, why we mutually contradict ourselves by valuing what we say and thus contradict ourselves and involve ourselves in strife. If we only realized that we are all being judged, then we must and would judge with the greatest reserve and eventually cease judging altogether. That is why there is so much error in our judging and discriminating. Our opinions can be true only when they proceed out of what God thinks about us. But if we build our houses so that the peak of the roof becomes the foundation, we shall surely experience their downfall. Again and again a vigorous, deliberate thoughtfulness is necessary, and perhaps very bitter experiences, to bring us to the consciousness, whereby we will be quiet and perceive that before we weigh, we are weighed, that before we let our little lights shine, we are first in the presence of a great light.

The Lord weigheth the spirits, it says. We humans weigh by the gross, as we say. What is life? It is the journey of man through his allotted time; his infancy and aging; those pieces of good fortune and those of ill fortune which befall him; his appearance which gradually takes on sharper lines until upon the deathbed these lines finally, intuitively indicate what his character actually was; the pleasant or unpleasant impressions which he arouses; his words, whereby we habitually read his thoughts; his achievements from which we think we learn what he is or is not capable of doing; the influence which radiates out from him; his success which he possesses or does not possess. As we look upon all this we judge a human life, and perhaps ourselves, as a fortunate or unfortunate, a good or bad, a worthy or unworthy person. On the basis of these things we respect or neglect, love or hate. What is life? The trek of mankind through the ages; the history of differing epochs or cycles of culture; the variations among mankind; how they labor, feed, clothe and educate themselves; how they separate themselves in war and peace; mankind’s great men; their ingenuity and discoveries; the battles won and lost; their monarchies and democracies; their art and science; the untold possibilities of their faith; and finally their gods and idols.

Viewing all this we speak of world history, of progress and evolution, of the glorious past, tragic present and darker future. But the Lord weigheth the spirits. Is this then life? Or what is life in all this? Do we not err when we weigh in gross? The Lord weighs the true weight, the content. This content is secreted in all sorts of crevices, but what are the crevices without a content? The crevices are not weighed along. The spirits are the essential things weighed. The spirits, the spirits of men are life which surges, moves, creates in all that is called life, whether good or evil. The spirits are the fruits of which it is said—by them shall ye know them, the fruits which are gathered in the eternal granaries of God, as well as the weeds which shall be consumed with eternal fire. The spirits dwell beneath all sorts of countenances, and the countenance does not always correspond to the spirit which dwells beneath. The spirits speak in various languages and not always does the great spirit speak out of the great deed, nor the small spirit out of the insignificant.

All the evil that folks plan does not proceed out of the evil spirit, nor does all good come out of the good spirit. The spirits dwell in the highest as well as in the lowest strata of mankind and where they dwell no one knows. The spirit is the man himself as God alone knows him. He is the man as he is penetrated through and weighed of God, as he stands naked before God, for or against God, honest or dishonest, true or untrue, chosen or rejected. The spirit of man is in the scale of God. The novelty of this fact is: Our sins cannot corrupt us, our righteousness cannot save us, it is the spirit that comes to judgment. The spirit of man that comes to judgment is the tap-root of man in eternity, the spirit is as an open window facing Jerusalem, the spirit is as the question full of answers: how can I gain a merciful God? The spirit is as suffering pregnant with a hopeful hearing: Thy Kingdom come! What is the significance of anything and everything else, what is the significance of progress and decadence of the world’s history in the face of this one thing? How do you stand towards this one thing? There life itself becomes a burning question, there is the difference between life and death, there is the finger which writes upon the wall: numbered, weighed—and perhaps—found too light. And it is the Lord who weighs the spirits. God is the Spirit of all spirits and thus their judge. God’s word is the living, powerful, sharp, double-cutting sword. God is the truth of our lives, of all life. We cannot be respectful enough, we cannot retreat back far enough, we cannot stand distant enough so as to even faintly conceive what it means that God weighs the spirits.

It is possible that whenever we utter the word “God” we think of something high, great and beautiful, as a goal or ideal which we have set for ourselves. But fundamentally that would be a weighing of ourselves by ourselves; we ourselves would be our own judges and emancipate or condemn ourselves. But God dwells in a light which no man can approach. Even the highest which we think about Him when measured by His true self is still an illusion. He himself is God. He alone knows us. He alone accepts us or rejects us. He alone, He only. Wherever man stands before God he faces a “Halt!” which he cannot escape, a “Halt!” that can be compared only with death. Whatever belongs to our natural lives is not yet really of God. And what has come to us from God is no longer of us. When in life we are laid upon the scales of God, we are confronted by a death-line, a boundary line of judgment, and whatever is on this side of the line must pass away.

But the extremity-line at which we stand and face God is also a beginning; the “Halt!” which is directed at us is also a command to march, “Forward!” The death-line of our existence is also a line of life’s beginning, the line of grace. That sharp incision which separates us from God is also the boundary by which we partake of His invisible, everlasting being. Just that quest after God cannot tear us away, it cannot cease, it cannot be discharged, for the quest is the answer. This is the new thing about this truth: we stand in the light of the cross and the resurrection of Jesus, weighed of God, dying His death with Him and living His life with Him. We never come forth from God and yet we are never forsaken of God. We cannot get along with Him and yet we cannot leave off continually questing after Him anew. Flesh and blood cannot inherit the Kingdom of God—and yet this corruption must put on incorruption and this mortality must put on immortality. We are created beings, but we are created by God. We are dust and ashes in his sight, but we are never without hope of salvation and glory. Wanderers between two worlds, travelling from here to yonder, nearing always the yonder from the here. For the Lord, in whose hands we are, is the Lord of life, because he is the Lord of death.

And now: The ways of a man are clean in his own eyes. Here we are in the midst of what we already understand all too well. Here is where all of us live, in the circle of our duties and obligations, the cares and the joys of our life, whether significant or insignificant. Here we live and weigh, each with his own particular character, with his own particular fortune, with his own particular light, or, it may be, with his own darkness which is given him. Here is where we live and compare ourselves unconsciously with others who are either better or worse off than we, or who are faring better or worse than we. Here is where the whole of mankind lives, in the peculiar twilight of the present moment, in which no one knows whether the day will dawn or whether it will now become a darker night; here the nations, parties, classes live with their particular necessities and particular truths, here also dwell the multitudinous individuals who go their lonely ways with their thoughts and aspirations, with that which they would love to promote and proclaim. And every man’s ways are clean in his own eyes. And each one thinks that he is justified in walking his own way and convinced that he must walk in precisely that way in which he is walking, nursing his inner complaints or his joys in his workaday conduct, his love or his hate.

We can quarrel with one another about what we regard in our own eyes. One could say to another: You do not mean well, or, you have no intention of meaning well. It is not right for you to weep and to laugh then and there, to speak and behave thus and thus. Look and take notice how I regard things in my own sight. Behold, how clean my way is. One can also lose his zeal to quarrel about what others regard as good and clean. But what is clean, if every man can regard his way as clean? Does it not all amount to this, that our ways are all unclean? Behold, that is our life, when faced with the great “but” of the Bible. In the face of that “but” all the life of mankind is clean and, yet, nothing is clean. All yes and all no. Whoever is satisfied in this pride and doubt in this twilight and fog, does not hear this “but.” Whoever cannot endure this twilight hears and notices and understands. He places himself in the unambiguous light which falls upon our lives from on high.

But the Lord weigheth the spirits. Are our ways clean or unclean, are we right or wrong in our living, thinking and speaking, if the Lord weighs the spirits? We must say, No, we are not right. Who can be right in God’s judgment? Who can remain calm and self-reliant when he is placed in the scales of God? Who is there that cares to stand before Him? No, in His presence we can but become terrified, become humble; in His sight all this strife about what is clean in our own eyes comes to an end, before Him everything that would stand and remain firm is shattered and dissolved. But we must say Yes, too, for who does not have the right, who could not secure the right through the grace of God? Who could not be secure, calm and hopeful if he is in the scale of God? Who cannot stand in the power of forgiveness? Are we not His own, known of Him, moved by Him? Does not the death-line, which is the life-line, pass through the midst of our life? Why should not our ways be clean before Him?

No and Yes can be said of us, No and Yes is the truth of our lives. In God there is no opposition to us. In God we persevere, for in Him is stimulus, life, hope. There is nothing but Yes and No in God, only because of the Yes. Those people who have heard the “but” no longer are disturbed about the No and the Yes; they pilgrim, they toil, they pray from one to the other; they have, even as prisoners, something of the freedom of the coming world within themselves. Fearful and certain in spirit they are even now God’s witnesses and preparers of the way. Do not let anyone say, “I cannot hear.” Jesus has spoken, even to our life: I am the resurrection and the life!